Jessica Simpson, your thoughts?

[lilboo]

So I work at a Walmart, and Jessica was just here yesterday signing her new CD. She is hot. Mmm. But anyway, I have a ton of pictures from the event, and I have like 68 pics on a CD-R. I have a listing on eBay. Do you think anyone will actually buy it? Just curious really..I started it out at $9.99.

Would anyone like a link? I guess post your email address, because I don't want to post the link and make it like spam. I'm trying to steer clear from that. I may of touched the lines of it, but hey.

Though, I wished Britney would of came to Wal-Mart instead :*(

[WhipSmartBanky]

Nice tits, butter face.

[XboxMaster]

JESSICA SIMPSON IS HOTTER THAN BRITNEY AND HALF OF CHRISTINA COMBINED!

[lilboo]

Hahah.. she is SO small! She is like 5 foot, and like 40 lbs! I was like.. wait. WTF? If I sneeze, shes going to fly away.. noooo :(

[SneakyPenguin]

soooo hot.

but why are the pretty ones so so dim

"i know its chicken, but is it fish?"

[minx]

she reminds me of some friends of mine, so I have a soft spot for her:-)

That said, I think the people at the label are idiots as through watching her show I found out that she actually can sing exceptionally well, but they were telling her not to.

apparently if a singer is good to too great a degree, people can't sing along to the song and therefore the album won't sell as much -- or so her label claimed.

personally, I would've actually bought one of her albums if she sang the way she wants to-- she sounds like a rather bluesy Southern Mariah Carey left to her own devices.

[msdmoney]

Hotter and a better voice than Brittany who IMO is just average without all the makeup and styling. But man Jessica got much more in the looks department than brains.

[PaulEMoz]

Hahah.. she is SO small! She is like 5 foot, and like 40 lbs! I was like.. wait. WTF? If I sneeze, shes going to fly away.. noooo :(

Her knockers weigh more than 40 lbs.

Nice but dim, I would say. Not that dim though, she's a rich girl.

[moiety]

She was just at our local Wal-Mart on Friday, and so many teenyboppers showed up that they could only let 30 people in. Then, she had to leave cuz the crowds were so rowdy. Some young woman got arrested for shoving some kids out of the way...I guess all she wanted to do was go in and buy diapers.

My thoughts on JS? She is the prime example for blonde jokes.

And me, being not blonde, can point and laugh :P

Edit: lol that was my 200th post.

[GF_Eric]

I like her less because of her TV show. So so stupid. I see her new video, which is poking fun at herself and the show, and I just cringe.

[lilboo]

Hey, that's where I work at. The one she was at on Friday. It was CRAZY, I can't belive how insane that was. I had a good time being a part of the little security team..and yellin at people :D

Mmm.. her.
In the backroom when she was going out past us to go sign autographs..me and my friend were like "....Hi...OMG!".. lol and she smiled .. Orgasm occured.

Good times.

[magilacudy]

I'd pick Jessica over Britney any day... I'd pick something out of my nose over 'X'tina any day also, shes so damn trashy

[moiety]

lilboo: I had no idea, cuz your location says New Jersey, so I figured she must be traveling around or something.

[lilboo]

She did 4 Walmarts. One on each timezone. Or something like that.

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=3391816204&ssPageName= ADME:B:LC:US:1

Thats the auction I have... was THAT the one you were at when she was wearing that??

[regisphilbi0]

Her TV show is just sad. The whole "do buffalo have wings?" was just funny. Igot a huge laugh out of that.

[lilboo]

I seen so many people yesterday carrying around cans of Chicken of The Sea and wanted Jessica to sign it. I'm not sure if she did or not..but I was laughing my ass off when I seen all of them people with it!

[moiety]

Oh no no no. I didn't go. I saw it on the news. And she was at the Danvers, MA Wal-Mart the same day. It's about 20 minutes north of Boston. So she did at least one in each timezone 8)

I'm sure you'll sell those photos.

[lilboo]

I hope so. If they sell well.. I'm definitly going to put more up. This is just a test really.. ^_^

Lots of CDs sold = money for me
Money for me + cheapassgamer.com = LOTS of games

LOTS of games = bliss

[SneakyPenguin]

arg its too late for math, especially on a jessica simpson thread. we should at least post stuff she could understand

[WhipSmartBanky]

I understand this:

http://www.blender.com/articles/article_665.html

:shock:

[cmndrhavok]

Very Hot. Who knows? maybe shes only playing the fool.

It really makes you wonder when the cameras shut off for her show and she and her husband lie down for an evenings rest and she sits there maniacially laughing and rubbing her hands together saying "THESE FOOLS!"

[jalu6]

Turnersville? Wheres that? I live in NJ too, and it certainly would have been worth the trip to see her.

You know, if I was like, some kind of stalker or something.

Which I'm not.

I swear.

[lilboo]

Its in South Jersey. On Rt 42

[paz9x]

I saw her a couple years ago at snow summit. I was amazed at how much hotter she was in person. Easily one of the hottest girls ive ever seen anywhere.

[bignick]

Id like to slide my finger down the crack of her ass.

[lilboo]

Id like to slide my finger down the crack of her ass.

lmao

[WhipSmartBanky]

Id like to slide my finger down the crack of her ass.

Why? Wanna give her a Dirty Sanchez?

[cmndrhavok]

wow. thats not too far where I live. thats a shame.

what the hell was she doing in NJ?

[TonyC]

Id like to slide my finger down the crack of her ass.

Haha, I feel ya Playboy!

[lilboo]

wow. thats not too far where I live. thats a shame.

what the hell was she doing in NJ?

She has a new CD, well.. it's a re-release of her new album, "In This Skin". This CD is only available at Wal-Mart, and it has a few new songs on it, and has some DVD features. So she made trips to 4 Wal-Marts to promote it and sign it. That's basically it.

[redgopher]

She's kinda meh in my opinion. Speaking of manufactured pop singers, I was flipping thru TV and caught a Hillary Duff vid, thinking "Yeah, I'd hit it" until I realized that she looks like my hellish ex-girlfriend, you know, only not fat.

And Hillary's teeth are straight too.

SHUDDER

[magilacudy]

Haha. I saw a commercial on the news about it, they made it seem like she was just randomly shopping at Walmart.

[magilacudy]

She's kinda meh in my opinion. Speaking of manufactured pop singers, I was flipping thru TV and caught a Hillary Duff vid, thinking "Yeah, I'd hit it" until I realized that she looks like my hellish ex-girlfriend, you know, only not fat.

And Hillary's teeth are straight too.

SHUDDER

el oh elll

[redgopher]

She's kinda meh in my opinion. Speaking of manufactured pop singers, I was flipping thru TV and caught a Hillary Duff vid, thinking "Yeah, I'd hit it" until I realized that she looks like my hellish ex-girlfriend, you know, only not fat.

And Hillary's teeth are straight too.

SHUDDER

el oh elll

Yeah.
I kinda wanted to chop off my own dick after that realization.
It was pretty bad.

[magilacudy]

http://www.blender.com/articles/article_665.html

courtesy of Fark.com

[WhipSmartBanky]

http://www.blender.com/articles/article_665.html

courtesy of Fark.com

Courtesy of me earlier in this thread:

http://cheapassgamer.com/forum/viewtopic.php?p=83029&highlight=#83029

[magilacudy]

Whoops... well she's definitely hot enough to warrant 2 links... =P

[MorganWebbLover]

Listen she's no Morgan Webb Ok. Morgan Webb is the hottest women ever to grace are world remember that folks.


http://textamerica.com/user.images/img_380807/T40403042124250.jpg

[magilacudy]

I read your other posts, I thought Morgan Webb was one of those Wall Street businesses. ehh.. she's aite

[suprsaiyanMAX]

Morgan Webb is pretty good looking, but I'm pretty sure she hardly plays any of the games on that show and X-Play is a pretty awful show too.

[TheRock88]

She's just like all the other pop singers out there. Cant sing but has a nice face and body.

[scuba]

You should have put up

Jessicas Simpsons laugh caught in a jar! And had a jar on ebay, lol and I bet someone would have bid. I am sure someone will bid.

[magilacudy]

I was watching this MTV special about Jessica Simpson at my friend's house a few weeks ago. Apparently she started out as a Christian singer, but got rejected because she was 'too sexual' for her audiences. So, she was able to get auditions with some record exec and the rest is history. I wonder how her parents feel about her posing in magazines and doing strip teases on TV. funny stuff

[Mr. Anderson]

I'll be just like her: I have no thoughts whatsoever, due in part to the fact that I have a brain the size of a pinto bean.

[drfrielgood]

She looks hot in anything.

[Scrubking]

Simpson is a complete and utter MORON. She makes the guys from dumb and dumber look smart.

I find it funny that people on tv think that her stupidity is all an act - she couldn't act her way out of a paper bag.

The worst part is when she tries to use big words on her show - it just reinforces the FACT that she is a complete MORON.

I feel sorry for her husband who has to put up with such stupidity, and you can tell how much it bugs him when you look at his face.

[eatntae]

I think she's talentless, annoying, and unattractive. It's a wonder how she sells any records given the fact that she can't sing and her songs aren't catchy.

[magilacudy]

I just am waiting for the announcement of their divorce. If she truly is that stupid, how can her husband possibly go throughout life leading her like a kindergartener, it must be torture for him. Unless he has as much intelligence as she does, then its a different story.

[JimmieMac]

I want to spray my baby batter all over her neck, chest, face and hair.

[magilacudy]

You can make some baby pancakes with that batter after your done JimmieMac. Sounds like a bad Japanese porn.

[JimmieMac]

From http://www.blender.com/articles/article_665.html

The Hummer approaches its destination, Dallas’s NextStage Arena. “Is this where Chuck Norris filmed Walker, Texas Ranger?” Simpson asks. “Wasn’t he, like, a CIA agent?”

“Um, maybe he’s, like, a Texas Ranger?” Lachey says, and everyone laughs.

“Sorry,” Simpson says in a baby voice.

“It’s not Walker, Texas CIA Agent,” Lachey says.


The dumber she gets the more I want to put my evil inside her.

[metroidkiller9]

The dumber she gets the more I want to put my evil inside her.

ive never heard it called that before...

[JimmieMac]

The dumber she gets the more I want to put my evil inside her.

ive never heard it called that before...

Stick around, I got a bunch of'em.

[SneakyPenguin]

which is exactly why im leaving

[JimmieMac]

which is exactly why im leaving

That doesn't sound like something someone with a photo of "mei dick" would say.

[SneakyPenguin]

ok, you got me there. i wouldnt leave you anyway. you are all my friends!

right?

guys?

why does everyone abandon me :(

[magilacudy]

umm.. ok

[bmulligan]

As the crickets sang about SneakyPenguin's solitude, he dreamed of days past when Jessica would stroke his moist silky mullet. His lonliness, eclipsed only by the vacuousness of Jessica Simpsons cranial cavity, haunts him to this day. She used to call him her "little ducky" until she found out he was just a flightless bird.

[magilacudy]

First she realized he wasn't a chicken of the sea at all, and then eventually, not even a chicken. After consulting the dictionary, and then the local zoo, and then a dogeared copy of Discover for Kids she came to a conclusion. He was not any secretive sharp dressed fowl but a SneakyPenguin. She soon followed everyone else's lead and left in disgust.

[daphatty]

Not sure about the sneakypenguin stuff, but back on topic, Jessica is a hottie. Good christian girl with MASSIVE christian boobs. THAT is why Nick Lache married her. Everytime she says something stupid, all he has to do is look down and remember why he did it. I would give anything to find me a virgin with tits like that over the age of 20.

EDIT: Instead I got a good woman with a J-Lo ass. Good trade off, me thinks. :D

[magilacudy]

I don't mind about the virgin part, I wouldn't mind having a sexpot Britney-like girl with Jessica Simpson looks.

However, if I have a daughter I'd want her to be innocent and virginal like Jessica Simpson (but not as dumb).

[bmulligan]

Instead I got a good woman with a J-Lo ass. Good trade off, me thinks.

Yes, that sounds like a fine trade :wink:

[godhatesjustyou]

bah! Jessica Simpson makes me want to vomit with rage!!

[doraemonkerpal]

jessica simpson is fly! she's got a body, her face is better than average and her voice is real! if she had a brain, she'd have the whole package, lol!

[godhatesjustyou]

if i could, i'd blow sunshine outta my ass to show the digust i have for her.

[magilacudy]

if i could, i'd blow sunshine outta my ass to show the digust i have for her.

That sounds painful, yet would be interesting to watch. :shock:

[scott123456]

I'd do her... but my wife would be pissed.

[ayolykewhoa]

Jessica Simpson.......WHHHOOOOOOO!!!! Sexy!

[MorbidAngel4Life]

Jessica Simpson.......WHHHOOOOOOO!!!! Sexy!

I second that!

[magilacudy]

Nothing brings a community together quite like a hot ditzy blond girl.

[chilly]

I am sorry, but I don't think she is that dumb. We are not REALLY watching their lives...We are watching edited versions of their lives. I really think that when that camera is on. She plays it!

Think about all those stupid thoughts that go through your head, but this time...don't run your "brain filter" and just say them. I think that is what is up. Quite frankly it is pretty smart!

Jessica wasn't going to surpass Britney on the Pop meter, but doing this show and "playing the ditz" have made her a household name, which in turn sells!

She is laughing all the way to bank. I respect her for it too! The whole world thinks she is dumb and she doesn't care. Just giving people what they want!

[Scrubking]

http://www.explodingcigar.com/article1365.html

Jessica is a complete moron. During a visit to the white house she told the secretary of the interior that she did a great job decorating the white house.

[doraemonkerpal]

and to add to what scrubking said...

remember when she thought buffalo had wings? and asked if tuna were fish...? sounds kinda dumb to me :lol: