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Xevious
07-13-2009, 07:08 PM
CNET News

http://news.cnet.com/8301-17852_3-10285281-71.html?tag=TOCmoreStories.0

Manhole swallows teen texter

"OMG!!! You'll never guess what happened next!!!"

"What?!!!"

"OMG!!!! I'm being sucked towards Atlantis!!!!"

Perhaps that wasn't the texting exchange between 15-year-old Alexa Longueira and her friend as she walked along a Staten Island street. But it would
have been lovely if it had been.

Alexa, you see, as so many on the East Coast, had focused all her attention on her cell phone rather than the sidewalk.

According to a report by MSNBC, she did not dedicate the merest glance towards a sewer manhole that was lurking menacingly in her path.

As her eyes focused on her keyboard, her legs were sucked into the sewers of Staten Island, where who knows what vermin and demons scrape
together their survival.

MSNBC quoted the Staten Island Advance, which claims it was told by the teen: "It was four or five feet, it was very painful. I kind of crawled out
and the DEP guys came running and helped me (...) They were just, like, 'I'm sorry! I'm sorry!"

The question is, how sorry exactly.
You see Alexa's family appears to be suing the Department of Environmental Protection, perhaps for not protecting Alexa's environment.

Or her
footwear.
Alexa's mom told MSNBC: "Oh my God, it was putrid. One of her sneakers is still down there."

One can only imagine that one of Staten Island's rats is sprinting a little faster this morning.

You might be wondering whether Alexa suffered any injuries. Reportedly, she suffered only a little scare and a few scrapes. Still, the manhole did not
have cones around it, so how can Alexa have possibly known it was there?

Well, yes, she might have looked where she was going.

But why would you do that when you have a text to send?

FroMann
07-13-2009, 07:16 PM
Her parents are actually gonna sue.

Liquid 2
07-13-2009, 07:31 PM
Personal responsibility is a rare trait these days. :|

slickkill77
07-13-2009, 08:04 PM
Good. They should have kicked her when she tried to climb back up and then closed it.

the_punisher
07-13-2009, 08:35 PM
:rofl:

mis0
07-13-2009, 08:48 PM
I hate dumbass kids.

bvharris
07-13-2009, 11:47 PM
This thread would be sexier if you re-worked the title a bit, all the right words are there.

shadowkast
07-13-2009, 11:47 PM
classic

AgentMOO
07-15-2009, 01:08 PM
She wasn't hurt, there shouldn't be any suit here! Also anyone with a blackberry or iPhone is susceptible to doing something dumb like this. I was once walking down the street checking Destructoid and looked up to see a ladder about two feet from my face...

HowStern
07-15-2009, 01:43 PM
baaaahahahahaa she fell in a sewer!


that's good stuff.

bmachine
07-15-2009, 01:56 PM
People on the West Coast don't send text messages?

JolietJake
07-15-2009, 02:04 PM
Sounds like the beginning of a new ninja turtles cartoon.

depascal22
07-15-2009, 02:35 PM
People on the West Coast don't send text messages?

From what I hear, they still send Western Union telegrams. It's that or Pony Express but those damn Injuns keep stealing letters to my family.

I can't wait to hear the testimony from this case though. I wonder if she'll put the phone down long enough to take the stand.

detectiveconan16
07-15-2009, 02:41 PM
It'll be a hilarious day when they win the trial.

darkdaze73
07-15-2009, 04:23 PM
From what I hear, they still send Western Union telegrams. It's that or Pony Express but those damn Injuns keep stealing letters to my family.

I can't wait to hear the testimony from this case though. I wonder if she'll put the phone down long enough to take the stand.

She'll just text in her testimony. Dumb kids & their texting.