Has anyone actually used ColonBlow?

[BigDirty]

I saw several testimonials on their website and other wacky colon-centric health sites, but only have come across a small handful of negative experiences (in relation to the number of rave reviews of course). Any insight to the functionallity of this product would be appreciated, as for right now, I'm thinking I may be needing it.

[daikaiju]

I saw several testimonials on their website and other wacky colon-centric health sites, but only have come across a small handful of negative experiences (in relation to the number of rave reviews of course). Any insight to the functionallity of this product would be appreciated, as for right now, I'm thinking I may be needing it.



CAG - clogged ass gamer

[zewone]

All the time! I don't go anywhere without my ColonBlow.

[bignick]

I have always wanted to try it too.

[Zenithian Legend]

how about baby's buttpaste? anyone use that...

[The Gifuto]

how about baby's buttpaste? anyone use that...

I use the shit out of it.

[dtcarson]

I have heard that 'colon irrigation' is totally medically un-necessary.
I have used Boudreau's Butt Paste, well, on my baby's butt, and it seems to work prettywell. I haven't noticed any miraculous difference from any other good cream, but it hasn't been any worse. It's basically zinc oxide, which is the same stuff in those nose-specific sunblock creams.

[Journey]

Ok.....I don't know about this colonblow your talking about, but I had to take this fleet stuff one time that you mix with ginger ale......over the counter stuff........if it's anything like that, then be prepaired to be around a toilet for about 2-4 hours :( .....pissing out your ass :shock: ......violently :x .

Yeah....great time.

Why anyone would want to do this on their own is beyond me. I had to do it for a colonoscopy.

Yeah, more of a great time.

[opportunity777]

Goto a nearby colonics center ... it's only like $3000 a week at some of the really expensive spas :P

[Xevious]

I remember Rebecca Roj-Stamos was on Howard Stern a few years ago and she used a simliar system- a high collonic. Apparently things that we eat sometimes get stuck in our intenstines. For example, if you swallowed a piece of gum you swallowed when you were 11 years old may still be stuck in your intenstine.

The system she used flushed out all crap out of her body. She said she felt much better.

I thought this was an interesting show. And Rebecca Rojmain -Stomos was gutsy enough to talk about it on live radio.

[evilmax17]

http://justamessastuff.homestead.com/files/asswipes.jpg

[BigDirty]

Goto a nearby colonics center ... it's only like $3000 a week at some of the really expensive spas :P

I wish I could afford to go, I'd do it in a heartbeat.

[moiety]

I thought this was in reference to the old SNL commercial for ColonBlow cereal. There's actually a product called "ColonBlow"? :shock:

Somethin' new everyday...

[JSweeney]

http://snltranscripts.jt.org/89/pics/89ecolonblow3.jpg
Colon Blow

[ fade in on a man at a table, eating oat bran cereal from a bowl ]

Announcer: Hold it! Is that what you’re having for breakfast?

Man: Sure, haven't you heard? Fiber is really good for you.

Announcer: Well, there's fiber, and then there's high fiber. Try this.

[ offstage hands replace cereal box with Colon Blow cereal box ]

Man: Hmm.. Colon Blow. Sounds delicious. But is it really higher in fiber than my oat bran cereal?

Announcer: Take a guess: How many bowls of your oat bran cereal would it take to equal the fiber content of one bowl of Colon Blow?

Man: Two?

Announcer: Guess again.

Man: Three?

Announcer: A little higher.

Man: Four?

Announcer: Keep trying.

Man: Five?

Announcer: No, you'll have to do better than that.

Man: Seven?

Announcer: Guess again.

Man: Eight?

Announcer: We'll give you one more guess.

Man: Nine.

Announcer: Not even close. [ table starts shaking ] It would take over 30,000 bowls. [ a giant pyramid of cereal bowls shoots up from under the man, who yells in terror as it rises ] To eat that much oat bran, you'd have to eat ten bowls a day, every day for eight and a half years.

Man: [ after the pyramid settles; shouts from afar ] Wow! I think I get the picture! Colon Blow must be the highest fiber cereal on the market!

http://snltranscripts.jt.org/89/pics/89ecolonblow2.jpg

Announcer: Not any more, now that there's new Super Colon Blow.

Man: Super Colon Blow?

[ pyramid rises even higher with the man screaming ]

Announcer: It would take over two and a half million bowls of your oat bran cereal to equal the fiber content of one bowl of Super Colon Blow.

[ pyramid settles ]

Man: [ overwhelmed ]I'm convinced! [ looks down the pyramid in panic ]

[ cut to close-up of bowl with Colon Blow and Super Colon Blow boxes ]

Jingle: "Colon Blow and you-u-u-u in the morning"

Announcer: Colon Blow and new Super Colon Blow.

Voiceover: Warning: may cause abdominal distention. Consult a physician


http://snltranscripts.jt.org/89/pics/89ecolonblow1.jpg

[BigDirty]

I thought this was in reference to the old SNL commercial for ColonBlow cereal. There's actually a product called "ColonBlow"? :shock:

Somethin' new everyday...

www.colonblow.com

and there are some pictures to go with the testimonials......

[greydemise]

colon blow..i wud so buy it just for the same!
my friend worked at a small pharmacy , and they sold RAD-X, or RAD AWAY or sumthing like it, it was anti-radiation pills..i gotta get him to scan a pic one of these days, he keeps it in his car

[DCriminal]

God Bless - Phil Hartman.
RIP, my Brother. RIP.

[dtcarson]

Here's some interesting info about colonic irrigations from Mr Know-it-all himself, Cecil Adams.
http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a900525.html

Key phrases:

"The medical profession today, as you might expect, does not think much of colonics. There is little evidence that the procedure has any genuine therapeutic value, and the idea that it will cure sinus problems, asthma, earaches, migraine headaches, and the like is simply preposterous."
". There is no evidence, however, that dangerous toxins or excess fecal matter or what have you build up in the colons of people whose digestive systems are operating normally. "
"Colonics also have some serious drawbacks. They remove useful bacteria from the intestine, and the tubes can injure the sphincter and tissues. If the equipment isn't properly sterilized it can cause infection. At least 36 people were infected by a poorly designed machine used at a Colorado clinic in the late 70s; seven died."


If believe you may need the services of one, try the old-fashioned solutions first.
* drink a lot of water.
* take a laxative.
* eat some Taco Bell.
* let nature take its course.

[hutno]

Ok.....I don't know about this colonblow your talking about, but I had to take this fleet stuff one time that you mix with ginger ale......over the counter stuff........if it's anything like that, then be prepaired to be around a toilet for about 2-4 hours :( .....pissing out your ass :shock: ......violently :x .

Yeah....great time.

Why anyone would want to do this on their own is beyond me. I had to do it for a colonoscopy.

Yeah, more of a great time.

Yeah that stuff can be fun as hell, just when you thought nothing could be more unpleasant then having to drink it down.......ugh

[Xtreme331]

I saw several testimonials on their website and other wacky colon-centric health sites, but only have come across a small handful of negative experiences (in relation to the number of rave reviews of course). Any insight to the functionallity of this product would be appreciated, as for right now, I'm thinking I may be needing it.



CAG - clogged ass gamer

:rofl: Hahaha!

[Death2Sanity]

Ok.....I don't know about this colonblow your talking about, but I had to take this fleet stuff one time that you mix with ginger ale......over the counter stuff........if it's anything like that, then be prepaired to be around a toilet for about 2-4 hours :( .....pissing out your ass :shock: ......violently :x .

Yeah....great time.

Why anyone would want to do this on their own is beyond me. I had to do it for a colonoscopy.

Yeah, more of a great time.

Yeah dude, colonoscopies suck. Did they at least put you under for it? One of my doctors did...the other didn't. I didn't like him very much.

[Zenithian Legend]

God Bless - Phil Hartman.
RIP, my Brother. RIP.

The Hartman SNL skit is what first came to my mind when I saw the title too. Hmm... I think I'm gonna make my sandwiches and watch some Best of Eddie Murphy.

[ArthurDigbySellers]

The stuff that comes out of you after drinking colon blow looks like something from a Japanese Hentai comicbook. Its just not human looking.

Anyway, we should get a CAG pool going to get BigDirty to take it. I'd kick in a doller to start. We could send the money to Stealthy's paypal account and then he could pay BigDirty once the deed has been done.

[epobirs]

I'm a Horkin' fiber Chunks user myself. It does the job. I'm just near the end of Geneis right now. Aaaah!

[Kayden]

Actually... the best way to fix it is to poop squating. Apparently toilets were designed wrong and pooping while sitting is actually harmful. over 2/3s of the world poops squatting. America, Western Europe and japan only do it because its 'civilized'. I've done a lot of reading on it and its worth looking into... They even sell a platform you can set on your toliet so you can drop bombs from on high in the proper possition.

[ArthurDigbySellers]

Ok.....I don't know about this colonblow your talking about, but I had to take this fleet stuff one time that you mix with ginger ale......over the counter stuff........if it's anything like that, then be prepaired to be around a toilet for about 2-4 hours :( .....pissing out your ass :shock: ......violently :x .

Yeah....great time.

Why anyone would want to do this on their own is beyond me. I had to do it for a colonoscopy.

Yeah, more of a great time.

You got lucky that your Dr. uses Fleet. That shit is much easier than Colyte or Golytely. You have to drink a gallon, yes, a gallon of it and it tastes like vomit. My poor wife had to go through that and could only drink about 1/3 of the gallon. I was trying to encourage her to drink all of it until she told me to take a sip. It was the worst thing I have ever tasted. I didn't argue with her after that.

[Death2Sanity]

Ok.....I don't know about this colonblow your talking about, but I had to take this fleet stuff one time that you mix with ginger ale......over the counter stuff........if it's anything like that, then be prepaired to be around a toilet for about 2-4 hours :( .....pissing out your ass :shock: ......violently :x .

Yeah....great time.

Why anyone would want to do this on their own is beyond me. I had to do it for a colonoscopy.

Yeah, more of a great time.

You got lucky that your Dr. uses Fleet. That shit is much easier than Colyte or Golytely. You have to drink a gallon, yes, a gallon of it and it tastes like vomit. My poor wife had to go through that and could only drink about 1/3 of the gallon. I was trying to encourage her to drink all of it until she told me to take a sip. It was the worst thing I have ever tasted. I didn't argue with her after that.

It depends on how high up the large intestine the doctor wants to go. If it's just the lower part of the large intestine, enemas will do. If it's the whole bastard, well, yeah. One's a colonoscopy, one's called I believe a sigmoidoscopy...I think the colonoscopy is the full thing, but I don't remember for sure.

Done that gallon thing before too. What they gave me was like salt water, only nastier. You're SUPPOSED to drink like a glass of it every 15 minutes until it's gone, but it's so nasty that you either give up, or are forced to drink on it slowly, continuously, until it's gone. About 1/2 of the way through, you're drinking while you're shitting, because it's rushing out of you as fast as you can put it in.

No, I don't enjoy doing these things to myself, I used to have ulcerative colitis before I had surgery to get rid of it.

[Zman310]

I tell ya, there's nothing quite like reading this thread while eating lunch :D

[BigDirty]

The stuff that comes out of you after drinking colon blow looks like something from a Japanese Hentai comicbook. Its just not human looking.

Anyway, we should get a CAG pool going to get BigDirty to take it. I'd kick in a doller to start. We could send the money to Stealthy's paypal account and then he could pay BigDirty once the deed has been done.
Is that a challenge I smell, or just something else? :lol:

[ArthurDigbySellers]

The stuff that comes out of you after drinking colon blow looks like something from a Japanese Hentai comicbook. Its just not human looking.

Anyway, we should get a CAG pool going to get BigDirty to take it. I'd kick in a doller to start. We could send the money to Stealthy's paypal account and then he could pay BigDirty once the deed has been done.
Is that a challenge I smell, or just something else? :lol:

Your nose is correct, it is a challenge. The smell after accepting the challenge will be from the ColonBlow.

[BigDirty]

The stuff that comes out of you after drinking colon blow looks like something from a Japanese Hentai comicbook. Its just not human looking.

Anyway, we should get a CAG pool going to get BigDirty to take it. I'd kick in a doller to start. We could send the money to Stealthy's paypal account and then he could pay BigDirty once the deed has been done.
Is that a challenge I smell, or just something else? :lol:

Your nose is correct, it is a challenge. The smell after accepting the challenge will be from the ColonBlow.

So the gauntlet has been thrown down.... maybe should look into a digital camera for the challenge so there could be pictures, that, my friends, would be a sight to behold....

[Alpha2]

HOLY CRAP!
It's real?!

[mbstuff]

No, I don't enjoy doing these things to myself, I used to have ulcerative colitis before I had surgery to get rid of it.

Are you completely cured or are the symptoms just in remission? One of my friends just got diagnosed with ulcerative colitis and he's been freaking out that it's a lifelong condition.

[Moxio]

I saw several testimonials on their website and other wacky colon-centric health sites, but only have come across a small handful of negative experiences (in relation to the number of rave reviews of course). Any insight to the functionallity of this product would be appreciated, as for right now, I'm thinking I may be needing it.



CAG - clogged ass gamer

:rofl::rofl::rofl:

Nice one!

[Journey]

Ok.....I don't know about this colonblow your talking about, but I had to take this fleet stuff one time that you mix with ginger ale......over the counter stuff........if it's anything like that, then be prepaired to be around a toilet for about 2-4 hours :( .....pissing out your ass :shock: ......violently :x .

Yeah....great time.

Why anyone would want to do this on their own is beyond me. I had to do it for a colonoscopy.

Yeah, more of a great time.

Yeah dude, colonoscopies suck. Did they at least put you under for it? One of my doctors did...the other didn't. I didn't like him very much.

Yeah man, I was out......before I went in, a few people that I talked to told me that they don't put you out. I was not happy about that. When they told me that I was going to be put under I was so relieved.

As far as the taste of the fleet stuff, since it was mixed with ginger ale, it basicly tasted like ginger ale. It took about 45 mins to an hour for it to take effect, but when it did......DAMN!!!!! It was like the scene in Dumb & Dumber X 100.

[Xevious]

This is a great thread...I find this so informative.

[ZeroSupporT]

I gotta hand it to BigDirty, to stand up and demand a colon cleanser and the input of the board takes confidence unmatched by myself.

[rjarmstrong100]

Ok.....I don't know about this colonblow your talking about, but I had to take this fleet stuff one time that you mix with ginger ale......over the counter stuff........if it's anything like that, then be prepaired to be around a toilet for about 2-4 hours :( .....pissing out your ass :shock: ......violently :x .

Yeah....great time.

Why anyone would want to do this on their own is beyond me. I had to do it for a colonoscopy.

Yeah, more of a great time.

You got lucky that your Dr. uses Fleet. That shit is much easier than Colyte or Golytely. You have to drink a gallon, yes, a gallon of it and it tastes like vomit. My poor wife had to go through that and could only drink about 1/3 of the gallon. I was trying to encourage her to drink all of it until she told me to take a sip. It was the worst thing I have ever tasted. I didn't argue with her after that.

It depends on how high up the large intestine the doctor wants to go. If it's just the lower part of the large intestine, enemas will do. If it's the whole bastard, well, yeah. One's a colonoscopy, one's called I believe a sigmoidoscopy...I think the colonoscopy is the full thing, but I don't remember for sure.

Done that gallon thing before too. What they gave me was like salt water, only nastier. You're SUPPOSED to drink like a glass of it every 15 minutes until it's gone, but it's so nasty that you either give up, or are forced to drink on it slowly, continuously, until it's gone. About 1/2 of the way through, you're drinking while you're shitting, because it's rushing out of you as fast as you can put it in.

No, I don't enjoy doing these things to myself, I used to have ulcerative colitis before I had surgery to get rid of it.

Colonoscopy is just the large intestines. And yes, UC does ::explative::..I've got it too...along with Crohns

[rjarmstrong100]

No, I don't enjoy doing these things to myself, I used to have ulcerative colitis before I had surgery to get rid of it.

Are you completely cured or are the symptoms just in remission? One of my friends just got diagnosed with ulcerative colitis and he's been freaking out that it's a lifelong condition.

odds are it just put him into remission, since both Crohn's and UC can become malicious again even after surgery, from what I recall...

[Scorch]

http://www.99w.com/evilsam/ff/krystal.jpg

[Zman310]

http://www.99w.com/evilsam/ff/krystal.jpg

Um...Am I missing something here?

[Scorch]

http://www.99w.com/evilsam/ff/krystal.jpg

Um...Am I missing something here?

You must not have a Krystals in your area.

Krystals is probably the best colon cleaner out there.

[Zman310]

Yup, no Krystals around here, at least not that I know of. I've never even heard of it.

Edit-Checked their website, and the closest one appears to be in Tennessee. And their burgers look suspiciously like White Castle...

[Scorch]

It's the longest running White Castle clone there is. I like them better than WC.. actually, every White Castle here was shut down because of the business Krystal generated.

But man oh man, let me tell you.. some days the Krystals are alright.. but other days.. good god.

[JSweeney]

I've had both.
White Castle's are still better.

But, I've got to say that nothing is better on the morning after a bender on Burbon Street than to hit the Krystal's there

[Death2Sanity]

No, I don't enjoy doing these things to myself, I used to have ulcerative colitis before I had surgery to get rid of it.

Are you completely cured or are the symptoms just in remission? One of my friends just got diagnosed with ulcerative colitis and he's been freaking out that it's a lifelong condition.

odds are it just put him into remission, since both Crohn's and UC can become malicious again even after surgery, from what I recall...

Ulcerative colitis is cured by surgery, but Chron's isn't.

As for the dude who said he had UC and Chrons...man, I feel for you. Good luck with that.

[ArthurDigbySellers]

http://www.99w.com/evilsam/ff/krystal.jpg

Um...Am I missing something here?

You must not have a Krystals in your area.

Krystals is probably the best colon cleaner out there.

LOL. I busted out laughing as soon as I saw that. Krystal's are the cure to pretty much any intestinal problems you are having.

BTW, Scorch, is that a Nashville location? It looks way nicer than any Krystal I have ever seen.