God approves of Oral sex [Mobile/Archive]

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The Shiznit

03-18-2005, 06:50 PM

And he also wants your girl to swallow. Now you can tell your girls this is what God wants.

http://www.sexinchrist.com/oralsex.html

sblymnlcrymnl

03-18-2005, 07:03 PM

We are gratified that so many Christians are hungry for the word of the Lord

So that's what they're calling it now, huh?

javeryh

03-18-2005, 07:06 PM

And he also wants your girl to swallow.

well, duh - you aren't supposed to waste any of that stuff - everyone knows that... :P

Zman310

03-18-2005, 07:13 PM

And he also wants your girl to swallow.

well, duh - you aren't supposed to waste any of that stuff - everyone knows that... :P

There are Jews in the world, there are Buddists,
There are Hindus and Mormons and then
There are those that follow Mohammad, but
I've never been one of them.

I'm a Roman Catholic,
And have been since before I was born,
And the one thing they say about Catholics is
They'll take you as soon as you're warm.

You don't have to be a six footer,
You don't have to have a great brain,
You don't have to have any clothes on,
You're a Catholic the moment Dad came, because

Every sperm is sacred,
Every sperm is great,
If a sperm is wasted,
God gets quite irate.

Every sperm is sacred,
Every sperm is great,
If a sperm is wasted,
God gets quite irate.

Let the heathen spill theirs,
On the dusty ground,
God shall make them pay for
Each sperm that can't be found.

Every sperm is wanted,
Every sperm is good,
Every sperm is needed,
In your neighborhood.

Hindu, Taoist, Morman,
Spill theirs just anywhere,
But God loves those who treat their
Semen with more care.

Every sperm is sacred,
Every sperm is great,
If a sperm is wasted,
God gets quite irate.

Every sperm is sacred,
Every sperm is good,
Every sperm is needed,
In your neighborhood.

Every sperm is useful,
Every sperm is fine,
God needs everybody's,
Mine, and mine, and mine.

Let the pagans spill theirs,
O'er mountain, hill and plain.
God shall strike them down for
Each sperm that's spilt in vain.

Every sperm is sacred,
Every sperm is good,
Every sperm is needed,
In your neighborhood.

Every sperm is sacred,
Every sperm is great,
If a sperm is wasted,
God gets quite irate.

drone8888

03-18-2005, 07:19 PM

Monty ROCKS!!!

:)

bowmanarmy

03-18-2005, 07:21 PM

You people are so going to hell

sblymnlcrymnl

03-18-2005, 07:24 PM

You people are so going to hell

See you there.

nickmad

03-18-2005, 07:29 PM

ive approved oral sex for years, why didnt anyone listen to me?

Scorch

03-18-2005, 07:29 PM

You people are so going to hell

I secured my first class ticket many years ago by finding this (http://www.jesusdressup.com/) site.

beerguy961

03-18-2005, 07:55 PM

alonzomourning23

03-18-2005, 08:25 PM

You people are so going to hell

I secured my first class ticket many years ago by finding this (http://www.jesusdressup.com/) site.

I solidified my position long before I clicked that link, but pretty much now know that I'm going no matter what...

I have an aversion to mocking a guy who is dying, even if it's jesus. I didn't expect that.

Though this is clearly a joke. But, since I'm supposed to be going out with a catholic girl sometime next week, this might be useful :D

onikage

03-20-2005, 03:53 AM

And he also wants your girl to swallow. Now you can tell your girls this is what God wants.

http://www.sexinchrist.com/oralsex.html

Sounds like God's way is the way to go in this case.

David85

03-20-2005, 02:08 PM

All sex is good sex.

Plus cum is good for you, lots of protein.

But girls don't know how to do it anyways, so it don't matter.

Lina

03-21-2005, 03:04 AM

Scum.

Mookyjooky

03-28-2005, 09:33 PM

All sex is good sex.

Plus cum is good for you, lots of protein.

But girls don't know how to do it anyways, so it don't matter.

So I guess that why you get down with the guys....they always know how to do it right.

Ozzkev55

03-28-2005, 09:43 PM

I secured my first class ticket many years ago by finding this (http://www.jesusdressup.com/) site.
a first class ticket from someone on CAG, im hiding in the luggage, on a first class plane to hell

dc snake

03-28-2005, 09:50 PM

Scum.

:rofl: A not so suprising reaction from a girl.

Xevious

03-29-2005, 01:01 AM

Sex and religion should not mix.

alonzomourning23

03-29-2005, 01:14 AM

Sex and religion should not mix.

I guess you don't like nun porn

Pylis

03-29-2005, 04:03 AM

Heh, I actually agree with Lina and Xevious on this one, even though this whole thread is just a bad joke anyway.

Then again, I'm also apparently an emotional pussy.

masha

03-29-2005, 11:43 AM

The Necessity of Swallowing and The Benefits of Swallowing... hmmm.. I don't have to ask anymore.....Thank GOD :mrgreen:

Lina

03-29-2005, 01:26 PM

alonzomourning23

03-29-2005, 01:50 PM

I have no issue with oral sex. I love giving and receiving it.

But, spermazoa has no business being near one's face. It was only created for the purpose of reproduction. And babies don't come out of my mouth.

Ugh... and I don't understand the craze with "facials". It's disgusting, and only serves to humiliate women.

How can something be humiliating if a women enjoys it? Sure, it's not the most popular thing, but if some people like it then it's not humiliating toward them. Is gay porn, where a guy cums on another guys face, humiliating?

Though I have no idea why swallowing would be viewed as humiliating.

masha

03-29-2005, 02:06 PM

I have no issue with oral sex. I love giving and receiving it.

But, spermazoa has no business being near one's face.

Some girls love it, some don't. I'm with one now who does. She also likes when.......nevermind :lol:

It was only created for the purpose of reproduction. And babies don't come out of my mouth.

I thought women were created for that purpose?! :)

Ugh... and I don't understand the craze with "facials". It's disgusting, and only serves to humiliate women.

No it doesn't serve to humilliate anybody. What about bondage?

God just approved it . ENJOY! ..... IKeeDIKeeD.

Xevious

03-29-2005, 10:46 PM

Ugh... and I don't understand the craze with "facials". It's disgusting, and only serves to humiliate women.

I never understood facials either but all pornos feature that. One of my friends told me he likes dropping a load on someones face but he is kinda freaky.

Xevious

03-29-2005, 10:48 PM

I guess you don't like nun porn

Thats funny. I never thought of that.

Sarang01

03-29-2005, 11:40 PM

Ugh... and I don't understand the craze with "facials". It's disgusting, and only serves to humiliate women.

Ahhh so you speak of Bukkake(see a bucket, no I'm NOT joking). Meh some people got freaky tastes(no pun intended), let em' do their thing.
When I first read this title I thought it was about the Sheik on Al Jazeera who ruled that it was cool. Caused quite a stir among Muslims there, well it was either that or Anal.

alonzomourning23

03-30-2005, 12:06 AM

Ahhh so you speak of Bukkake(see a bucket, no I'm NOT joking). Meh some people got freaky tastes(no pun intended), let em' do their thing.

There are women who have that fetish as well, at least being on the recieving end of it.

dcfox

03-30-2005, 12:10 AM

I never understood facials either but all pornos feature that. One of my friends told me he likes dropping a load on someones face but he is kinda freaky.

I'm curious as to how this came about in a conversation but then again I think the answer might scare me.

Xevious

03-30-2005, 01:50 AM

I'm curious as to how this came about in a conversation but then again I think the answer might scare me.

My friend worked as a soundman for some band. As asked him how life was on the road and he started telling me stories.

In one story, He told me how he met this older woman in Denver and she was a slut. He was bragging about giving her a facial.

So thats how it all came about (No pun intended).