Final Fantasy XII Potion Review

[CheapyD]

http://cheapassgamer.com/ymij/finalfantasypotion.jpg

While I was at Yodoboshi Camera (Shinjuku) today trying to complete my 500 yen ($4.25) Robocop Trilogy figure collection (http://www.action-hq.com/cgi-bin/action-hq/oth003062.html), I noticed the Final Fantasy XII Potions on display at the checkout counter. Priced at 200 yen ($1.70) for a measly 120ml (4oz), I wasn't exactly an interested buyer, but I figured at least I could let my fellow CAGs know if it's any good or not.

Review:
Despite the fact that this stuff won't cure you of anything, the Final Fantasy XII Potion must be the most mediciny tasting beverage on the planet. In comparison, Robitussin is a delicious exotic cocktail and Pepto Bismol tastes like a Root Beer Float. The FFXII Potion tastes so bad, you would think it would either get you incredibly drunk or cure Cancer. Being that it does neither makes me wonder why this drink exists.

I can not comprehend how the fine folks at the Suntory Group put such a foul tasting beverage on the market. It's almost as if they are daring Final Fantasy fans to drink it. My guess is that the meetings on the Final Fantasy XII Potion went something like this (translated from Japanese):

Executive A: "Man, those kids sure are crazy about that Final Fantasy."

Executive B: "Yeah, I bet it doesn't even matter what our drink tastes like. If it has a Final Fantasy label on it, it will sell faster than a 14 year old school girl's soiled panties."

Executive A: "Despite the fact that I've been huffing glue all day, I think I've just had a brilliant idea. Let's bottle up some donkey piss and mix it with toxic waste."

Executive B: "Sounds like a plan. Got any of that glue left?"

[mykevermin]

Yeah, well...how many HP did you gain?

[FurryCurry]

I'm sure he gained -10 hp. You didn't drink all of it did you Cheapy (no wonder it's 4 oz)?

Cheapy have you ever had those holiday Jones Sodas? The ones that are flavored after turkey & gravy, cranberry sauce, brussel sprouts, corn on the cob, salmon, etc. If you have, do they compare to the blue bile that you just put in your mouth?

[fatbeer]

I'm sure he gained -10 hp. You didn't drink all of it did you Cheapy (no wonder it's 4 oz)?

Cheapy have you ever had those holiday Jones Sodas? The ones that are flavored after turkey & gravy, cranberry sauce, brussel sprouts, corn on the cob, salmon, etc. If you have, do they compare to the blue bile that you just put in your mouth?

:rofl:

I heard those holiday Jones Sodas is one of the worst drinks of all time.Not even a bum will drink that crap

[slidecage]

are you sure you are to drink it??? maybe it was something to put your skin or soak your feet in...

[1modernboy]

Way to take one for the team, Cheapy! Now go eat some dirt to get the taste of that foul elixer outta your mouth. :)

[twanky]

I just want the bottle it looks cool. Unfortunately, the only place you can get it at the time is at play-asia for 13$ plus 6$ shipping. Only if Cheapy can hook me up.

[CheapyMom]

I was worried that you might have been poisoned Cheapy so I did some googling to see if I could find what the ingredients are. All I learned is that the potion contains 10 "secret herbs" and is being marketed as an energy drink. I also came across this TV commercial (http://web-cache.stream.ne.jp/web/selector/suntory_viewer/user/wmt_b.html?cont=softdrink/ff/battle&band=b&player=wmt).


(http://web-cache.stream.ne.jp/web/selector/suntory_viewer/user/wmt_b.html?cont=softdrink/ff/battle&band=b&player=wmt)

[SpottedNigel]

Would it mix well with anything? Or just bear piss?

[Heyricochet]

While I was at Yodoboshi Camera (Shinjuku) today trying to complete my 500 yen ($4.25) Robocop Trilogy figure collection (http://www.action-hq.com/cgi-bin/action-hq/oth003062.html),

Wow, thats an expensive capsule toy, but badass enough to be worth it. Most expensive I saw was 2 bucks. Isn't there anywhere to just buy the complete set so you don't have to take the risk with the capsule machine?

[CheapyD]

Cheapy have you ever had those holiday Jones Sodas? The ones that are flavored after turkey & gravy, cranberry sauce, brussel sprouts, corn on the cob, salmon, etc. If you have, do they compare to the blue bile that you just put in your mouth? No, but they sound nasty.


Would it mix well with anything? Or just bear piss? It tastes like its already been mixed with piss.

Wow, thats an expensive capsule toy, but badass enough to be worth it. Most expensive I saw was 2 bucks. Isn't there anywhere to just buy the complete set so you don't have to take the risk with the capsule machine? The Robocop figures are not capsule toys. They come in a box and are known as "One Coin Figures", with that "one coin" being 500 yen. They are larger and more detailed than capsule toys. However, you still have to get lucky to get the complete set as the boxes are not marked. There is probably some place you can go to pay a premium and get the complete set, but I do not know where that would be.

I actually got the same 3 figures that I bought the first time I went Roboshopping. It's the Mappy syndrome (http://www.cheapassgamer.com/forums/showthread.php?t=77053) all over again!

[youruglyclone]

...I must have those figures. Leave it to the japanese to show love to something America so neglects.

any interest in selling your dupes?

edit: cheapyd you actually linked to a site that sells the set for about 55 usd in your original post.

[CapAmerica]

How much would it cost me to have you ship me a box of thous? Most site that are selling them are really ripping off people by chargeing them $20+ per bottle.

[Jack]

I'm curious as to what's in it. Could you list the ingredients?

[2Fast]

I've always preferred Phoenix Down anyway.

[Beana Blasta]

those robocop figures are pretty cool

[Dkellar]

Maybe this stuff is used to clean bathrooms?

[mikeohara]

the bottle looks cool ... that's all. I ain't drinking it based on Cheapy's review.

[Eviltude]

Maybe thats why hardly anyone uses em in FFXI and even then it's a last resort thing.

[Moxio]

*CheapyD moves to Ja-Pan!*

*CheapyD has been Zombified!*

*CheapyD uses Potion x1!*

*CheapyD takes 9999 damage!*

Game Over

[RelentlessRolento]

Yeah, well...how many HP did you gain?

http://youtube.com/watch?v=U2of98A86aI

[CheapyD]

any interest in selling your dupes?

edit: cheapyd you actually linked to a site that sells the set for about 55 usd in your original post.Sorry, the dupes are already spoken for.
I'm pretty sure that site is selling a whole case of them.

[2poor]

What kind of drink is it supposed to be? Flavored water, energy drink, etc..?

[thorbahn3]

Ten bucks says someone will have one of those bottles attached to their hip as some FF cos-play costume. Also since Japan loves Capsule toys so much wouldn't they have some kind of trading area or perhaps a website?

[spoo]

How much do the Limited Edition ones cost? They look cool as hell thanks for the review. Now I know I can buy empty ones with out missing anything.

http://www.aaaseller.com/imgs.asp?img_id=200755&listing_id=&sBGcolor=b080f0

[CheapyD]

The Premium Box is about 600 yen ($5 or so).

[CapAmerica]

If I paypaled you some money would you be able to send me a few of thouse Premium versions? =D

[62t]

Those Capsule toys and figures are really neat. When I was in Hong Kong a small shopping center has a whole floor selling those kinds of things.

[Zoglog]

Limited edition Metallica Cock Ring

[Darkside Hazuki]

Limited edition Metallica Cock Ring

What?! :-s

[nickelpin]

When I heard about Potion, I knew that I wanted one like crazy. But not enough to pay $30+ for a $6 item... (http://cgi.ebay.com/Suntory-FINAL-FANTASY-XII-POTION-Premium-Box-JAPAN_W0QQitemZ6042066068QQcategoryZ13667QQrdZ1QQc mdZViewItem)
Sure entertaining watching people on eBay who want it more than I do...

[radjago]

http://img82.imageshack.us/img82/6837/ffxiisuntorytime8fd.jpg

[Scorch]

I really, really, really want one or two of those bottles.

I just wonder how i'd get the taste of that shit out of there.

[RelentlessRolento]

actually the cheapest way to get one of these is by the following:

1. Eat a large pile of blue colored sand

2. Wait, and take a crap

3. Grab your blue crap and heat it at 500 degrees for a fee minutes

4. Pull out crap, let cool

5. Wait an hour and, voila! Poition bottle much joy!

[Apossum]

the FFVI potions were so much better.

[Kain Vincent]

http://img82.imageshack.us/img82/6837/ffxiisuntorytime8fd.jpg

:lol:

[Porject D]

Well, i guess you can get them on ebay too.

http://cgi.ebay.com/Suntory-Final-Fantasy-XII-Potion-Premium-Box-NEW-SEALED_W0QQitemZ6042814971QQcategoryZ13667QQcmdZVi ewItem

I need to get a lot of those to get my HP back. 8-)

[amusedtoe]

Maybe flavor's only inclusded in the premium version? lol

[Graystone]

Am I the only one that thinks thats a scary color blue for a drink to be?

If someone handed me a glass of that I would throw it back into there face.

[CheapyD]

Nice one radjago! You make that yourself?

[amusedtoe]

Am I the only one that thinks thats a scary color blue for a drink to be?

If someone handed me a glass of that I would throw it back into there face.

As you burn their eyes and scar their face. That and I bet it's an amazing metal cleaner that removes calcium, rust, and lim buildup!

[whoknows]

http://youtube.com/watch?v=U2of98A86aI
:rofl: Japanese commercials are so cool

[radjago]

Nice one radjago! You make that yourself?
Yeah, just a little quick and dirty photoshoppery.

[HeadRusch]

The stuff probably goes great with other Asian delacasies like:
Shark Brain and Tiger Testicles.

"GIVE YOU POTENT! YOU HARD LIKE IRON!"

:P

[Squee]

Maybe the blue color and piss taste come from the ammonia in windex. Hmm... I wonder what an ether would taste like.

[SaMiDaDrAgOn]

Looks like listerine! MMmmMmMm

[keiblerfan69]

Well I guess it was a good idea that I didn't buy some.

[Zingela]

I ordered some of the premium bottles a little while back, still waiting for them to arrive. Now I'm not sure I want to drink them. :(

[whoknows]

Pepsi Blue anyone?

[yukine]

Pepsi Blue anyone?

:puke:

[PittsburghAfterDark]

It's got a cool bottle, cool color but tastes worse than Listerine? At just $1.70 per 4 oz bottle!

Damn! Send me a case. I'll peddle them at some geekfest comic book convention for $10 each as "RARE! COLLECTABLE! NOT FOR SALE IN THE U.S.!".

[Spacepest]

Oooh, I want one of those bottles. I'm not going to drink the fluid in it though.

Of course, I could just throw the blue juice out, clean the bottle, and replace it with vodka and blue food coloring instead. Now that's an HP potion!

[sblymnlcrymnl]

http://youtube.com/watch?v=U2of98A86aIWell that wasn't really worth their trouble now was it? :lol:http://img82.imageshack.us/img82/6837/ffxiisuntorytime8fd.jpg:lol: :applause: :applause: :applause:

[DARKiLLUSiON]

....the colour looks like one of those bathtub cleaner >_>
atleast the bottle looks good

[Roufuss]

Gamestop had this potion commercial on one of their TV's, kind of odd to see it there.

[Diiz]

My friend is sending me a box of stuff from Japan, and she said she picked up one of these potions for me... Glad CheapD gave it an awful review so I wouldn't be tempted to drink it :lol:

[Theenternal]

I'm sure he gained -10 hp. You didn't drink all of it did you Cheapy (no wonder it's 4 oz)?

Cheapy have you ever had those holiday Jones Sodas? The ones that are flavored after turkey & gravy, cranberry sauce, brussel sprouts, corn on the cob, salmon, etc. If you have, do they compare to the blue bile that you just put in your mouth?


They were doing taste testing for those drink here at UF, i got to taste them and give my review on tv, the worst one is the brussel sprouts, liquid gag.

[Nirvanaguy777]

CheapyD uses Potion on Sephiroth.
Sephiroth is defeated.
CheapyD is victorious.
CheapyD gains 8948239 Exp.

Glad that potion isnt available in the states.

[RacinReaver]

Hey Cheapy, is that the robocop figurine that has the slot to put the little tabs down his back and there's a hammer there so when you pull the hammer back and release it it'll strick a little gunpowdery looking thing on the paper and make a spark/bang/smoke?

Because, seriously, that was on of the coolest toys I had as a little kid.

[CheapyD]

Nope, these are just recently released in Japan... 500 yen ($4 or so) figures.
http://www.action-hq.com/cgi-bin/action-hq/oth003062.html (for pics).

I am happy to report that I now have the complete collection (even the shameful Robocop 3 figure, which is better than the movie).

[Tybee]

Dude, you drank the fluid they use to demonstrate absorbancy in diaper commercials.

Add milk and pour it into a Tupperware cylinder and you could resell it as "Official Star Wars Tatooine Moisture Farmer Juice!"

[gunm]

Ingredients? Grape extract, sugar, royal jelly, propolis, camomile, sage, tyme, hysop, marjoram, rosemary, basil, lemon herb, amino acid, caffeine, vitamin B6, B1, blue no. 1...

I wonder if it tastes anything like Lipovitan, the original Asian "Red Bull"?

[BIG5]

I hear it tastes like grandma.

[Nintendomaster13]

post ingrediants please.

[Raymond]

After you drink it and still feel nothing, that mean your HP is full. LOL go out and take some damage, and then drink again and see what happen.

[jjmai]

so bad I want to try it.

[Zenithian Legend]

Man, this is why I want to get into marketing this Summer, people will buy anything, you just have to find the right way to package it and the right distribution channels.

[marten]

CheapyD uses Potion on Sephiroth.
Sephiroth is defeated.
CheapyD is victorious.
CheapyD gains 8948239 Exp.

Glad that potion isnt available in the states.

Maybe this is Square's way of saying that "mix" won't be in FFXII...because they've already done it for us :roll::lol:

[mykevermin]

http://www.ncsxshop.com/cgi-bin/shop/SNT-520.html

$20.50 shipped *per* limited bottle. Holy Christmas!

(Their review of the beverage seems to support Cheapy's palate almost perfectly)

[GuilewasNK]

I know the editing sucks but I was tired of fooling with it.

http://img401.imageshack.us/img401/733/billy1el.jpg

[Benisjamin]

What is that Mario thing behind the glass and where did you get it?!

[Zoglog]

we purchased about 3 of the limited editions at softmap. My girlfriend tried it and she didn't think it was too bad haha but my ex roomate. UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. I agree with my ex roomate since my girlfriend has wierd tastes like she likes black licorice and sparkling water....

and me? I've read enough to know not to touch that crap....


http://static.flickr.com/38/121845050_e53e79a5fe.jpg

[Tybee]

we purchased about 3 of the limited editions at softmap. My girlfriend tried it and she didn't think it was too bad haha but my ex roomate. UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. I agree with my ex roomate since my girlfriend has wierd tastes like she likes black licorice and sparkling water....

and me? I've read enough to know not to touch that crap....


http://static.flickr.com/38/121845050_e53e79a5fe.jpg

Why is your roommate wearing a dress?

Okay, okay. I know it's a nightshirt.

Why is your roommate wearing a nightshirt?

[Zoglog]

Why is your roommate wearing a dress?

Okay, okay. I know it's a nightshirt.

Why is your roommate wearing a nightshirt?

dunno, the hotel provided it and he liked to wear it?

[moojuice]

Kinda off topic, but have you tried that "Yogu" stuff? I think its actually pretty wicked good.

[Makenshi]

hey i was wondering my uncle lives in Japan and said he'd send me some does ne1 no where the Premuium bottles are sold? As close to Fusa as possible plz ^^;

[Scorch]

so.. I still want one of these bottles.

[evazerone]

You're just not daring enough, Zog. It's a unique flavor that one can only taste and not describe... a unique cocktail that will awaken your senses. ^^

The Jones sodas, particularly the Brussel Sprout flavor, were *ABSOLUTELY* disgusting. Like waiting for Knights-of-the-Round-Summon-in-FFVII-and-W-Summon-Materia-and-Mimic-bad. FF Potion only tasted like crap.

I'm sure that was a comfortable night shirt. What a loser.

[sinewav]

Nice Super Mario display thingy, I saw something similar when I visited the Philippines, where did you find it?

[Sejad]

Found another Video about the Final Fantasy Postion, this time gamespot made a commercial video/review about it.

http://www.gamespot.com/ps2/rpg/finalfantasy12/media.html

To find the Video it's the seventh one down from the list it is called:

"On the Spot - FF12 Potion Challenge" CLICK IT!!!!

[Chacrana]

I think that video is really, really old, but regardless, it's damn funny. Can't believe nobody posted it yet.

[BryceDraven]

I would still try it because I am crazy/stupid that way. >.> haha!

[Paco]

I'd give this to a lot of my friends. Some of them are real FF nuts and would drink a FF beverage in an instant.

[gmunchkin]

zing! that must of stung. Well, thank you for keeping me from wasting my money on that putrid bottle of donkey piss.

[Emophia]

:rofl:

I heard those holiday Jones Sodas is one of the worst drinks of all time.Not even a bum will drink that crap
Dude... I love those drinks...

[vivafriend5]

That's disgusting... (resumes drinking Bawls)