I remember posting this in the embarrassing moments thread, but I'll post it here anyway. Possibly NSFW due to language.

A while back my mom caught me watching porn. She said " What are you watching? What is that? ". I cut the porn off and didn't answer. That's not all, the movie had a title over it in big letters that said " Girl raped in mouth, pussy, and ass " ( and I swear to god, if you were to search " Rape " on dump.com you'd see this video ). I don't know if she saw that because I was kinda trying to use my head to block the screen, but it was really weird because I was going at it like crazy before she came in. The part that I was on could probably be considered regular sex. He was just on top of her licking her breasts, but kinda forcefully while she wiggled around a bit.

I also have another similar incident that happened. I was watching this Japanese porno ( the Red Hot Fetish Collection with Miko Hukunaga, but these scenes are a dime a dozen anyway ) and there was a scene where this office lady gets bored and starts masturbating. So, I'm jerking and my mom comes in. I flinched. She says " what?". I angrily tell her to let me know when she's coming in, as it was pretty much obvious there that I was embarrassed. I'm wondering if she didn't know it was porno or not, I mean, the closeup was right there on the crotch of the girl's stockings, but maybe she just wasn't paying attention. Either way, I think she got the idea after I got mad at her.

Those are the only " got caught jerking " moments I can think of. Now my computer is in a room with a lock but everyone can open the lock easily just with their fingernails ( I might be blasting music or asleep when they need something from this room). It takes a few seconds though, and that's enough time for me to put it away and close the window.

Last year the final lab project in Biology was dissecting a frog. This would've been sweet had this one girl not been forced into my group. She had predetermined that she didn't want to touch the frog and I even heard her talking to her friend about how she didn't want to touch the frog, so I lunged it at her and asked her if she wanted to touch it. Apparently, I thought this girl was cute, because I was shaking like a cocaine addict while trying to cut this frog open. And I know she, the teacher, and everyone around her noticed. They had to.

She was a girl. That told me that I had to try to portray some of my best traits to her. I made a joke. I said " You know, these frogs [I][B]died [/B][/I]just so we could just mess around in them like this. They were gassed and they didn't even get a chance to have children........You know, they do this to humans too. " She nodded but I'm betting she didn't find that joke funny. Of course not, she thought I was a weirdo. It's like the mirrors thing I mentioned in a previous blog. I came to her mirror dressed like [URL="http://img501.imageshack.us/img501/677/373717648da1c9fabd2et7.jpg"]this [/URL]but it showed me [URL="http://img501.imageshack.us/img501/6732/silenceofthelambsyoushohz4.jpg"]this[/URL]. I also tried to portray manliness to her. She wanted to use gloves, I just went at the frog with no gloves on.

Now, the entire time throughout this I saw her as extremely frigid. She didn't even try to enjoy this. She barely did anything. She couldn't even laugh at my jokes. At one point she goes over and whispers something to the friend she was talking to earlier and I felt like putting my palm over my face and looking downward. That, to me, was the equivalent to not finishing the song in DDR because you missed so many steps. In hindsight, I don't give a shit how she felt because it doesn't mean anything. I should have lunged the frog at her again and asked her if she wanted to see it better when it was cut open and the guts were exposed. I should have said " This was popular in Europe a couple decades ago". I think I get off on freaking people out.

I remember sitting next to this cute Hispanic girl in Biology who kept twirling her hair around, tapping her foot and smiling at me . For some reason I had to smile back, and when she saw she giggled. She asked me the time, I told her, and that was it. Actually, it wasn't it, because I spent hours trying to wrap my head around what that really meant. It's just too suspicious that those are the exact signs of a girl being into you ( so says Maxim).

Later in the year, the teacher asked her if she would like to sit in that seat again, she insisted not to.

I never thought about it after that moment.