Went to my local thrift store, which is owned by Orthodox Jewish people (I think), saw two NES controllers, the RF adapter, the power cable, four games. The games were Final Fantasy, Tengen Tetris and some Sesame Streets. I passed on all of them, since I couldn't find the freakin' console. I could've gotten a reasonable deal on all of them maybe $20, but I just didn't feel like it.
Braving the pillow gauntlet.