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Go Back   Cheap Ass Gamer > Forums > Cheap Ass Gamer Lifestyle > CAG's "vs. mode": Politics & Controversy > U.S. Senate Candidate: Death Penalty For Homosexuals (Oh, he's a Democrat.)
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U.S. Senate Candidate: Death Penalty For Homosexuals (Oh, he's a Democrat.)

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Old 03-08-2006, 12:53 AM   #1
U.S. Senate Candidate: Death Penalty For Homosexuals (Oh, he's a Democrat.)

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Democrat for Senate: Death penalty for practicing 'gays'

Candidate says incumbent Republican not advocating biblical values enough

A Democratic candidate for the U.S. Senate in Ohio wants to make homosexual behavior a capital crime punishable by the death penalty.

Merrill Keiser Jr. is a trucker with no political experience, but he hopes to beat fellow Democrat Rep. Sherrod Brown in the May primary. The winner will try to unseat Republican incumbent Sen. Mike DeWine, assuming he wins the GOP primary.


Merrill Keiser Jr.

"Just like we have laws against murder, we have laws against stealing, we have laws against taking drugs – we should have laws against immoral conduct," Keiser told WTOL-TV in Toledo.

Keiser, 61, says he's running as a Democrat because that's how he was registered the last time he voted.

The trucker, who hails from Fremont, Ohio, says there needs to be more adherence to biblical values in government, business and education – something he claims DeWine is not promoting.

"I believe that the United States has been moved in a Godless direction by the courts," he told the Sandusky Register. "To get good men on the court, we need good senators."

Some of Keiser's other positions include defense of the Second Amendment, securing U.S. borders, lower taxes to stimulate the economy, support of Israel and prayer in public schools.

Keiser told the Register the United States should make conversion to Christianity part of the war on terror to teach Muslims the error of their choice in religion.

The candidate also decries evolution, saying it is contrary to the Declaration of Independence.

"The teaching of evolution works against the liberties we have in the United States," he told the paper. If a person believe in evolution, he or she "has no rights," he's quoted saying.

He also opposes the United Nations, abortion on demand and thinks so-called global warming is a false concern.

Liberal blogger Deborah White was less than thrilled with Keiser's candidacy and the media's response to it.

"What if this hate-filled moron called for the execution of all blacks or all Jews?" she asked. "Would the public outcry be similarly subdued? Would the press still report it as a cute curiosity or merely an alternative viewpoint? Where is moral outrage in 2006?"

White speculated Keiser was planted by the GOP.

"He must be a Republican plant," she wrote. "Please ... someone tell me I'm correct."

Linky Linky!

Priceless, absolutely priceless. I couldn't have written a better spoof if I tried. To think it's actually true!
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Last edited by PittsburghAfterDark; 03-08-2006 at 01:32 AM..
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Old 03-08-2006, 12:59 AM   #2
This line is the funniest:

Quote:
"The teaching of evolution works against the liberties we have in the United States," he told the paper. If a person believe in evolution, he or she "has no rights," he's quoted saying.


Though it seems like he's democrat simply because he wants to challenge republicans, even though he states it has to do with his voting registration.

It's funny, a right wing radical like that is a registered democrat, while I'm an independent.
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Old 03-08-2006, 01:12 AM   #3
Um, technically?

He's a left wing radical.

Just not the kind of left wing radical you're used to.
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Old 03-08-2006, 01:20 AM   #4
what's liberal about him? Everything listed is conservative taken to the extreme.
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Old 03-08-2006, 01:31 AM   #5
I'm just saying by the norms of the American political compass being Democrats being left, Republicans being right he's a left wing extremeist.

It's a joke 'zo, nothing else.

No, this guy hasn't got a prayer. No, I don't think he's at all representative of any political party. Yes, this is something worthy of the Onion.

It's a complete farcical article that was merely fun to post, even by my standards of constantly trying to rub people's noses in their beliefs. I just couldn't help but enjoy the irony of some guy so whacked out on what libs view as right wing issues being a Democrat.

Relax, this one is all in good fun. I'm not at all serious about pushing this one as representative of Democrats.

Oh BTW, maybe Fred Phelps will endorse him.
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Go Back  Cheap Ass Gamer > Forums > Cheap Ass Gamer Lifestyle > CAG's "vs. mode": Politics & Controversy > U.S. Senate Candidate: Death Penalty For Homosexuals (Oh, he's a Democrat.)

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