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Hey Kids! The Hot New Craze - Christian Side Hug!


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40 replies to this topic

#1 Quillion

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 07:45 PM



At the risk of posting something "Old", I'd like to share this delightful video production extolling the virtues of the "Christian Side Hug".


I copied the lyrics from another website:

Lyrics:
[CHORUS]
Gimme dat Christian side hug
Dat Christian side hug
Gimme dat Christian side hug
Dat Christian side hug
I'm a ruff rider
Filled up with Christ love
Gimme dat Christian side hug
Dat Christian side hug

These are the EG rules so
Pay attention, it's essential
This ain't no front hug zone
You ain't that fly, you ain't my jones

Stop and listen
No front hugs and no kissin'
I ain't that scared to call your momma
You'll be ridin' home in a coma

I got my groove
You ain't got nothin'
Follow these rules
Cause we ain't bluffin'

Now uh, you ain't no rabbi
You ain't no priest
So rise up off me like the shortbread with no yeast

Now uh, don't use that front hug boy
That makes us awkward
That's inappropriate
You back up off her 'cause we
Wanna keep our mind pure
Wanna keep away from sin
That means it's you too girl
Only one arm around him


[CHORUS x2]

We be walkin' like
We be talkin' like
We be side huggin'
Every day and night

It's how we do fool
This ain't no club
So don't be hatin' on me when I show no love

We livin' holy
It ain't no thang
So put your hands in the air and let that shoulder hang

I'm goin' global
Cause you don't know me
I'm buyin' babies like Angelina Jolie

So quit that huggin'
And slow down mama
And hit my fist like President Obama

Now, Democratic shift in the Congress, Repubs
Now, Democratic shift in the Congress, Repubs
Now, Democratic shift in the Congress, Repubs


[CHORUS x2]

I'm a married man
So you know I can hold hands
Front hug all day long with no other demands

But uh, as for all of you
Until you say "I do"
No front huggin' or PDA or your EG time is through

But uh, some of y'all is slick
Try to pull this trick
Your hug starts in the side
But soon it turns the chick

So if you end up here
Then go ahead and scream it
When I hug people I leave room for the Holy Spirit

If a girl walks up
With her arms spread wide
And she's front hug bound with that look in her eye

You better turn to the side
And pat her on her back
Cause Jesus never hugged nobody like that
(Scream it)

[CHORUS x2]

<Clever Signature Here>


#2 n8rockerasu

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 08:13 PM

I have no problem with religion and Christianity whatsoever. But what the hell is this crap??? You're either in or you're out, man. "I'm a ruff rider..."? Really?!? Like Teddy Roosevelt Rough Rider, maybe. But all that quasi-trendy, quasi-thuggin, trying-to-invent-a-dance, wannabe garbage just adds up to full retard.

It's bad enough that the lyrics are actually terrible, but there's not even an ounce of originality in this song. Maybe it appeals to the idiot masses out there, but if I were trying to spread a positive message and inform people about my beliefs, I'd at least do it with a little sincerity and self-respect. There's nothing quite like trying to convince people how bad the world is by spewing out watered down versions of the things that you think are evil. This performance is like non-alcoholic beer. What's the point???

I also can't even fathom a young person not only writing, but wanting to perform this flaming pile of dog feces. I fully expected to see "This Message Paid for by The Republican Party" at the end of the video.

#3 Purple Flames

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 08:15 PM

To paraphrase Hank Hill: You're not making Christianity better, you're just making rap music worse.

#4 JimmieMac

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 08:23 PM

I always thought Jesus would be a front hug kinda guy but these kids say different. Also, I like the reference to violence if you don't side hug. Sending you out in a coma is the only solution for someone wanting to show you affection.

#5 Lord_Kefka

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 08:50 PM

I laughed, I cried, I died a little inside.

Lord Kefka... you're insatiable.


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#6 The Great Muta

The Great Muta

Posted 04 February 2010 - 08:51 PM

According to the lyrics, those people are "livin' holy" by "buying babies like Angelina Jolie", putting people into a "coma", and showing "no love" to other people.

Um. OK. Sure.

#7 Malik112099

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 09:50 PM

Ahahahaahahhah!! For real?

Front hugs are the best cause you get to feel the titties on your chest.
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#8 camoor

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 10:00 PM

I have no problem with religion and Christianity whatsoever. But what the hell is this crap??? You're either in or you're out, man. "I'm a ruff rider..."? Really?!? Like Teddy Roosevelt Rough Rider, maybe.


Roosevelt's rough riders would have kicked the asses of these pansies and any of the other modern "ruff riders"

#9 Malik112099

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 10:10 PM

Fuck you Quillion...that shit is stuck in my head now.
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#10 Quillion

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 10:27 PM

Fuck you Quillion...that shit is stuck in my head now.

I warned you that it was the hot new craze.

<Clever Signature Here>


#11 JJSP

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 10:34 PM

I thought it was common knowledge that priests hugged from behind.

Cause I'm sick of seeing ghosts, and I know how it's all gonna end

There's no triumph waiting, there's no sunset to ride off in

We all want to be great men, there's nothing romantic about it

I just want to know that I did all I could with what I was given

I just want to sell out my funeral.

I just want to be enough for everyone.


#12 fatherofcaitlyn

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 10:44 PM

Front hugs are the best
cause you get to feel
...titties on your chest.


Dude! You're busting rhymes, too.
Synergize, bitches!
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#13 SpazX

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 10:56 PM

Front hugs are the best
gotta feel them
titties on your chest.

Don't you want a chance
to touch some breasts?
It's all about the
front hugs, Fuck the rest.

Posted Image


#14 Sito

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 11:19 PM

I don't even know what to think after seeing that
I love lamp

#15 gamingninja

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 11:48 PM

This makes me wanna kill. Who? I'm not sure, but after seeing this someone must die
There are no small kills, only small ninjas-

Its not about the size of the dog in the fight, its about finding out how many heads the dog has and then choppin' em off real quickly and also killing the demonic spirit that is possessing that hell hound -

The baby with two heads can kill alot more than the baby with one -

#16 Deadpool

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Posted 05 February 2010 - 12:07 AM

I can't stop laughing! :lol:
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#17 Frank Deluded

Frank Deluded

Posted 05 February 2010 - 12:18 AM

To paraphrase Hank Hill: You're not making Christianity better, you're just making rap music worse.


Hank Hill and his sage wisdom. :applause:





#18 lordopus99

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Posted 05 February 2010 - 02:54 AM

WWJD? He wouldn't want to put someone in a coma... :roll:

Bad for Christians, Worse for fans of rap music

#19 Malik112099

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Posted 05 February 2010 - 03:08 AM

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#20 Malik112099

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Posted 05 February 2010 - 03:10 AM

Blessing pats!??!

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#21 Malik112099

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Posted 05 February 2010 - 03:13 AM

Jesus LOVES front hugging...

http://images.google...F-8&sa=N&tab=wi
Posted Image

#22 Panda Wizardry

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Posted 05 February 2010 - 02:53 PM

I can't think of anything more Christian than going out on stage to the sound of bullets being fired.

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#23 SpazX

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Posted 05 February 2010 - 03:19 PM

I can't think of anything more Christian than going out on stage to the sound of bullets being fired.



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#24 irideabike

irideabike

Posted 05 February 2010 - 03:32 PM

rock on side huggers

There are no shortcuts. No do-overs. What happened, happened. Trust me. I know. All of this matters.

Madden 13 SB Champ in the CAG gentleman's league.


#25 myl0r

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Posted 05 February 2010 - 04:15 PM

I prefer to call it the "awkward side hug", because that's what it is.



#26 Bretts31344

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Posted 05 February 2010 - 04:41 PM

Lol, wow this is terrible. Trust me, there are much better songs from Christians rappers. http://www.amazon.co...UTF8&node=63939

Lecrae, Toby Mac (more hip hop, but...), Sho Baraka (http://reachrecords.com/news/10093), etc.

This needs to be stopped.

#27 soulvengeance

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Posted 05 February 2010 - 04:50 PM

Since when is front hugging a sexual act?
mytradelist:
http://www.cheapassg...864#post2614864

Calls this what you may, but I would say that Blacks actually benefited from the slavery. Comparing the current lives of many African Americans to Africans, one can see that the former live in much better conditions with greater freedoms and opportunities.


#28 myl0r

myl0r

Posted 05 February 2010 - 04:51 PM

Lol, wow this is terrible. Trust me, there are much better songs from Christians rappers. http://www.amazon.co...UTF8&node=63939

Lecrae, Toby Mac (more hip hop, but...), Sho Baraka (http://reachrecords.com/news/10093), etc.

This needs to be stopped.

Lecrae-good
Toby Mac-GARBAGE

#29 n8rockerasu

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Posted 05 February 2010 - 05:08 PM

Since when is front hugging a sexual act?


When you're so repressed that even the slightest innocent brush of a "naughty part" against you turns you into a raging sexual deviant, who rapes women and kills babies. I'm sure that's what they're afraid of.

Because self control and respect are too difficult to teach. Let's just skip straight to avoidance.

#30 Apushmataha

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Posted 05 February 2010 - 07:52 PM

Uhoh. I've always known the side hug as the "We're just friends, so you won't receive the pleasure of bumping my wonderful bosom" hug. It's like they're somehow celebrating/advocating being in the friend-zone for all of eternity.:-(
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