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Engagement Rings (HELP!)


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#1 Sith

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 05:27 PM

Hey fellas. Need some serious help with this so I'll try to cut straight to the point:

I've been with my girlfriend for 6 years now and I think it's time to make things a tad more official.

Question #1: Is a pre-engagement ring a good idea or waste of money?

Question #2: How do you present this pre-engagement ring without making it feel like you're asking to get engaged lol? I mean do you get down on one knee still?

THE REASON I don't want to get an engagement ring yet is because I still have a year of college left and I don't want to get married until I have a steady job. HOWEVER, I do want to provide her with that form of security because I do love her and she's that type of girl that likes those things. I'll be going to Disney with her on December and we'll spend not only our anniversary there but new years as well, I mean, come on this is too perfect not to make something out of it.


NOW, ring prices. I have no idea what a decent ring looks like, I mean I don't want to buy a cheap ass looking ring neither a too expensive one. Something along the range $50 to $100 would be perfect. What qualities does a decent ring possess just so I know what to look for?

Thank you so much.

#2 irideabike

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 05:32 PM

So you're asking about a promise ring? Pick something cheap online and just stop thinking about it. A promise ring is slightly more official than dating, but just step it up and get engaged man.
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#3 Access_Denied

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 05:44 PM

So you want to get her a ring to let her know that you'll eventually get her the ring that means you guys will eventually get married?

Either Hallmark has everybody bamboozled or I'm not ever getting married.

#4 sgand

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 05:46 PM

Forget the ring, and ask her to go steady next time you're at The Max.

#5 HydroX

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 06:01 PM

$50-$100? LOL. Save some cash and spend at least $500 for a decent ring.

Otherwise just buy a copy of New Super Mario Bros U and put that on her finger.

#6 mtxbass1

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 06:05 PM

Skip the promise ring and get engaged. You've been dating 6 years now. I think she knows at this point that you're the one (and vice versa) I hope.

Price wise, what's your budget? I paid about $3900 for my fiancees engagement ring.



#7 gnarlyeggs

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 06:24 PM

Skip the promise ring. I was in the same situation to you almost exactly. 5.5 years together, 1 year of school left. We got engaged and set the date for 2 years from then. 1 year to finish school, 1 year to get married after.
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#8 Mixer23

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 07:25 PM

I agree, go ahead and get engaged. You've certainly been dating long enough, and just because you get engaged doesn't mean you have to get married right away. You can wait another 3 years if you want. Getting a promise ring after 6 years seems a little tacky, and the lead up to presenting it to her might throw her off given the circumstances, and could eventually cause a problem. So either spring for THE ring, or just give her something else in the aforementioned price range.

I finally proposed to my(now) wife last year after 5 years of dating, we're now married, and what do you know, it's not so bad. ;)

The articles I read seem to conjure up these images of Capcom executives sitting in a dark room with a cauldron and cackling about how no one will be able to buy this game used.


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#9 ITDEFX

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 07:39 PM

Yeah skip the promise ring and go for the engagement ring....although you might want to be old fashion and ask the parents permission first. You don't have to these days BUT you get shit loads of bonus points for asking their permission.
I was with my GF for 2 years before I asked her parents permission.. We got engaged in January of this year and got married in August...so within a year's time frame...any longer it's pushing it. Believe me there are plenty of rings to buy out there for under $1k so you don't need to break the bank.
I say the tricky part is her ring size................if she doesn't wear rings it could be hard........trying to get that sized is hard without setting off any alarms.

Good luck.

#10 irideabike

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 08:02 PM

I agree with ITDEFX, you don't need to break the bank on a ring.
There are no shortcuts. No do-overs. What happened, happened. Trust me. I know. All of this matters.

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#11 ITDEFX

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 08:14 PM

I agree with ITDEFX, you don't need to break the bank on a ring.



Oh yeah..forgot to mention, get the INSURANCE!
Believe me it's worth it!

#12 Stoic Person Eater

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 08:30 PM

Just get engaged. Promise rings are for high-school virgins with delusions of grandeur.

If you're serious about this girl, just get engaged. Hell, it's been six years, she could probably wait another year until you're done with school if you can't get an engagement ring by Christmas or whenever.

#13 chiwii

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 08:31 PM

I think the pre-engagement ring might be confusing. She'll be excited about getting engaged, but then you'll have to tell her it's just a pre-engagement.

#14 Calipso

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 09:09 PM

If I learned anything from the Simpsons it's that an onion ring is a sufficent engagement ring.

Promise ring? LOL.
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#15 mr_burnzz

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 09:19 PM

If she's the girl that loves stuff you gotta spend much more than a hundred. Go for the engAgement and mAke it romantic as hell. Both are going to be equally important to her. I hope you guys have discussed marriage already. good luck and congrats.

#16 brewtownska

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 09:44 PM

When getting the engagement ring, if you don't know what she'd like best on her finger long-term, or don't have the cash now to put what she DESERVES on her finger now, some of the chain retailers offer a trade-up program on their diamonds.

One of them I can think of has a trade-in guarantee that they will give you 100% of your purchase price towards a bigger ring, as long as what you buy is at least twice as much.

#17 Cheaplikeafox 3.0

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 09:46 PM

Definitely skip the promise ring. That's for high schoolers or born again virgins. And I don't mean to say that in a demeaning way, but if you are out of high school and over the age of 18 you should be thinking engagement ring and that's it.

Put your money towards an engagement ring fund and get to saving. That way when you get that steady job (hopefully within a year right after your graduate) you can pop the question and get to planning/saving for a wedding.

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#18 mtxbass1

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 10:26 PM

Oh yeah..forgot to mention, get the INSURANCE!
Believe me it's worth it!


Do this immediately. I carry a separate policy now for the ring. Runs me about $32 a year.



#19 detectiveconan16

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 10:31 PM

^Agreed.

If you seriously want to get married to her, get the engagement ring. Don't waste your money on "promise rings."

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#20 Mixer23

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 10:53 PM

Definitely skip the promise ring. That's for high schoolers or born again virgins. And I don't mean to say that in a demeaning way, but if you are out of high school and over the age of 18 you should be thinking engagement ring and that's it.

Put your money towards an engagement ring fund and get to saving. That way when you get that steady job (hopefully within a year right after your graduate) you can pop the question and get to planning/saving for a wedding.


I'm not so sure I'd endorse those as the only qualifications for engagement vs. promise ring(or whatever), most people around that age think they're ready to get married only to not be with the same person 6 months down the road. Not saying there's anything wrong with anyone who may have done this(It most certainly can work out, it varies by person), but if you're that young I HIGHLY suggest waiting another couple of years at least before taking any steps like that.

I just assumed the OP was older since it's been 6 years and they're going on vacation together. If you're still a teenager, I retract my previous advice.

The articles I read seem to conjure up these images of Capcom executives sitting in a dark room with a cauldron and cackling about how no one will be able to buy this game used.


Do you really think I could start a fast food restaurant called McDonaldz and use the golden arches as my logo and get away with it?

 

 


#21 The Great Muta

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Posted 28 November 2012 - 11:13 PM

With a year left in college, you must be at least 20. Ain't gonna lie: I'd date around before sealing off things. Let us say you're 20, you've been with your girlfriend since you were 14, and never had a chance to date around or explore opportunities. A lasting marriage is rare, these days, and I've rarely seen marriages work for those who do so when they're young. But hey, what the heck do I know, you two must be pretty compatible if you've been together for that long.

But yeah, skip the promise ring, junior. Ya have a job, right? Just buy an engagement ring and be done with it. It's not like it forces you straight into marriage and kids. It's just an engagement.

#22 ajh2298

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Posted 29 November 2012 - 01:21 AM

Forget the ring and stick it in her pooper.
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#23 GamerDude316

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Posted 29 November 2012 - 02:08 AM

yeah man, skip the promise ring. they're cool in high school I guess but thats it. After 6 years together, its time to go for engagement if shes the one you want.

#24 sgand

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Posted 29 November 2012 - 03:05 AM

Do this immediately. I carry a separate policy now for the ring. Runs me about $32 a year.


Really? Rings at Zales carry a lifetime warranty that covers theft or losing it.

#25 Mixer23

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Posted 29 November 2012 - 06:44 AM

Forget the ring and stick it in her pooper.


After seeing this, I'm actually quite surprised this didn't come up sooner. Over a whole page of serious responses... Well done, CAG, well done! :applause:

The articles I read seem to conjure up these images of Capcom executives sitting in a dark room with a cauldron and cackling about how no one will be able to buy this game used.


Do you really think I could start a fast food restaurant called McDonaldz and use the golden arches as my logo and get away with it?

 

 


#26 The Crotch

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Posted 29 November 2012 - 07:34 AM

OP, are you Arrested Development's George Michael?

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#27 JJSP

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Posted 29 November 2012 - 07:44 AM

If at all possible, avoid Zales/Kay/Ben Bridge/etc. In other words, don't buy your ring at the mall. I went directly to the diamond district in LA and spent 1/3 of retail value by buying direct from the jeweler. Picked out the stone, picked out the band, and she loved it. I spent $1500, appraised at $4700...and insured for that amount as well.

If you can save some cash on the engagement ring, by all means. Lord knows you'll need it for the wedding.

#28 Dokstarr

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Posted 29 November 2012 - 10:05 AM

Skip the promise ring and just do the engagement ring. I don't know how old you are but if you feel it is the right time start saving up for it, just don't rush into things. Of course I definitely don't rush. I've been dating my gf for about 9 years now.

#29 kodave

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Posted 29 November 2012 - 10:21 AM

If you were going to go with a promise ring, you probably aren't ready for an engagement.

A lot of shit can happen over the next year and the economy is still in the tank so depending on what field you want to go into, the land may still be barren when it comes to jobs. All that adds to stress on relationships and can cause things to go sour, even after 6, 7, 8 etc. years. Sadly very few things are "forever" even if you want them to be. But I hope you crazy kids make it.

Best of luck to you though.


#30 dmaul1114

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Posted 29 November 2012 - 03:59 PM

With a year left in college, you must be at least 20. Ain't gonna lie: I'd date around before sealing off things. Let us say you're 20, you've been with your girlfriend since you were 14, and never had a chance to date around or explore opportunities. A lasting marriage is rare, these days, and I've rarely seen marriages work for those who do so when they're young. But hey, what the heck do I know, you two must be pretty compatible if you've been together for that long.


Agree with that. I got engaged to my high school sweetheart in college. Thankfully never got married before breaking up when I was in my first semester of grad school after 8 years of dating.

Everyone's different, but pretty much all the high school sweetheart couples I know that got married ended up divorced, as did a lot of couples that got together in college.

Just hard to settle down in your early, or even mid, twenties these days with career's starting later due to needing more degrees and various other things.

I dated around a good bit after breaking up with that first serious ex, then dated another girl for 6 years through grad school and a year or two after. It's not easy to find someone you can be really sure you want to spend your life with. I feel pretty confident that I'll marry my current girlfriend though as with her everything just works, we communicate well, we share almost everything in terms of values, beliefs, goals interests etc. as well as just having a ton of fun together, great sex etc. So definitely don't settle if you have less than that. And if you have all that, then maybe you're one of the lucky ones who can get married early and make it work.


As for rings, as with everyone else skip that promise ring nonsense and go straight for engagement if you're really ready for it.