Hey Kids! The Hot New Craze - Christian Side Hug!

Quillion

Quillion

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_Oj0-splZw

At the risk of posting something "Old", I'd like to share this delightful video production extolling the virtues of the "Christian Side Hug".


I copied the lyrics from another website:

Lyrics:
[CHORUS]
Gimme dat Christian side hug
Dat Christian side hug
Gimme dat Christian side hug
Dat Christian side hug
I'm a ruff rider
Filled up with Christ love
Gimme dat Christian side hug
Dat Christian side hug

These are the EG rules so
Pay attention, it's essential
This ain't no front hug zone
You ain't that fly, you ain't my jones

Stop and listen
No front hugs and no kissin'
I ain't that scared to call your momma
You'll be ridin' home in a coma

I got my groove
You ain't got nothin'
Follow these rules
Cause we ain't bluffin'

Now uh, you ain't no rabbi
You ain't no priest
So rise up off me like the shortbread with no yeast

Now uh, don't use that front hug boy
That makes us awkward
That's inappropriate
You back up off her 'cause we
Wanna keep our mind pure
Wanna keep away from sin
That means it's you too girl
Only one arm around him

[CHORUS x2]

We be walkin' like
We be talkin' like
We be side huggin'
Every day and night

It's how we do fool
This ain't no club
So don't be hatin' on me when I show no love

We livin' holy
It ain't no thang
So put your hands in the air and let that shoulder hang

I'm goin' global
Cause you don't know me
I'm buyin' babies like Angelina Jolie

So quit that huggin'
And slow down mama
And hit my fist like President Obama

Now, Democratic shift in the Congress, Repubs
Now, Democratic shift in the Congress, Repubs
Now, Democratic shift in the Congress, Repubs

[CHORUS x2]

I'm a married man
So you know I can hold hands
Front hug all day long with no other demands

But uh, as for all of you
Until you say "I do"
No front huggin' or PDA or your EG time is through

But uh, some of y'all is slick
Try to pull this trick
Your hug starts in the side
But soon it turns the chick

So if you end up here
Then go ahead and scream it
When I hug people I leave room for the Holy Spirit

If a girl walks up
With her arms spread wide
And she's front hug bound with that look in her eye

You better turn to the side
And pat her on her back
Cause Jesus never hugged nobody like that
(Scream it)
[CHORUS x2]
 
I have no problem with religion and Christianity whatsoever. But what the hell is this crap??? You're either in or you're out, man. "I'm a ruff rider..."? Really?!? Like Teddy Roosevelt Rough Rider, maybe. But all that quasi-trendy, quasi-thuggin, trying-to-invent-a-dance, wannabe garbage just adds up to full retard.

It's bad enough that the lyrics are actually terrible, but there's not even an ounce of originality in this song. Maybe it appeals to the idiot masses out there, but if I were trying to spread a positive message and inform people about my beliefs, I'd at least do it with a little sincerity and self-respect. There's nothing quite like trying to convince people how bad the world is by spewing out watered down versions of the things that you think are evil. This performance is like non-alcoholic beer. What's the point???

I also can't even fathom a young person not only writing, but wanting to perform this flaming pile of dog feces. I fully expected to see "This Message Paid for by The Republican Party" at the end of the video.
 
I always thought Jesus would be a front hug kinda guy but these kids say different. Also, I like the reference to violence if you don't side hug. Sending you out in a coma is the only solution for someone wanting to show you affection.
 
According to the lyrics, those people are "livin' holy" by "buying babies like Angelina Jolie", putting people into a "coma", and showing "no love" to other people.

Um. OK. Sure.
 
[quote name='n8rockerasu']I have no problem with religion and Christianity whatsoever. But what the hell is this crap??? You're either in or you're out, man. "I'm a ruff rider..."? Really?!? Like Teddy Roosevelt Rough Rider, maybe. [/QUOTE]

Roosevelt's rough riders would have kicked the asses of these pansies and any of the other modern "ruff riders"
 
[quote name='Malik112099']fuck you Quillion...that shit is stuck in my head now.[/QUOTE]
I warned you that it was the hot new craze.
 
Front hugs are the best
gotta feel them
titties on your chest.

Don't you want a chance
to touch some breasts?
It's all about the
front hugs, fuck the rest.
 
[quote name='Purple Flames']To paraphrase Hank Hill: You're not making Christianity better, you're just making rap music worse.[/QUOTE]

Hank Hill and his sage wisdom. :applause:
 
godshug.jpg
 
[quote name='docvinh']Since when is front hugging a sexual act?[/QUOTE]

When you're so repressed that even the slightest innocent brush of a "naughty part" against you turns you into a raging sexual deviant, who rapes women and kills babies. I'm sure that's what they're afraid of.

Because self control and respect are too difficult to teach. Let's just skip straight to avoidance.
 
Uhoh. I've always known the side hug as the "We're just friends, so you won't receive the pleasure of bumping my wonderful bosom" hug. It's like they're somehow celebrating/advocating being in the friend-zone for all of eternity.:whistle2:(
 
[quote name='myl0r']Lecrae-good
Toby Mac-GARBAGE[/QUOTE]

Hey now, there is nothing wrong with Toby Mac.:whistle2:s Though I do prefer DC Talk. KJ-52 and John Rueben are favorites of mine too :D
 
[quote name='GaveUpTomorrow']Hey now, there is nothing wrong with Toby Mac.:whistle2:s Though I do prefer DC Talk. KJ-52 and John Rueben are favorites of mine too :D[/QUOTE]
hey, no offense or anything, different strokes and all
but most of these Christian "rappers" that are big in the christian music scene are horrible(actually don't get me started on 95% of general christian music). I don't know much about KJ-52, but I saw John Rueben a few years back and he did the same thing over and over for 45 min.
As for Toby Mac, I grew up on DC Talk and his solo stuff makes me sick. I almost laughed when I first heard one of his songs in Crackdown
 
This thread has apparently ruined my ability to distinguish parody from reality. Is that Youth Ministarz thing real? What the fuck is going on?!
 
[quote name='Halo05']This thread has apparently ruined my ability to distinguish parody from reality. Is that Youth Ministarz thing real? What the fuck is going on?![/QUOTE]

It looks like a parody, but it's actually really well done. It kinda reminds me of Jon Lajoie in a weird way...I think it's the music and the intentionally awkward pacing.

(I'm sure everyone on the planet has seen this, but just in case... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqXi8WmQ_WM Honestly, the miniStarz guy has more business being paid to do that than those morons in the "Side Hug" video.
 
[quote name='Quillion']
Cause Jesus never hugged nobody like that[/QUOTE]

And that right there is the problem with these guys. It's the problem with most of the outspoken fundamentalists. They add/subtract/alter the Scripture to fit their agenda, so they're telling you all sorts of things about Jesus that were never said or even implied in the Bible!
 
[quote name='Deadpool']I fucking love that song! :applause::applause:[/QUOTE]

Yeah, I still can't believe Dane Cook is more famous than he is. Almost all of Lajoie's stuff is hilarious. "Everyday Normal Guy" is probably my favorite. His newer one "WTF Collective" is also amazing.
 
Jesus & Christianity are evil!!!!! The missing scriptures are missing for a reason . . . . . Jesus eats babies:rofl:

Also Chuck Norris has a bigger following than Jesus Christ . . . . . [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse actually live in Chuck Norris's nutsack.[/FONT]
 
[quote name='camoor']Roosevelt's rough riders would have kicked the asses of these pansies and any of the other modern "ruff riders"[/QUOTE]

[quote name='n8rockerasu']Really?!? Like Teddy Roosevelt Rough Rider, maybe. [/QUOTE]

THEY SEE MEE ROLLLIN
THEY HATIN
PATROLLIN TRYNA CATCH ME
RIDIIN DIRTY

435_TheodoreRoosevelt_jeep.jpg
 
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