MOTHER SHAQ-FU-ER! The pains of day to day life.

MrNinjaSquirrel

MrNinjaSquirrel

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We all have those moments, when we accidentally inflict pain on ourselves through some stupid and probably avoidable circumstance. Maybe it's stepping on a Lego, or having our game shelf fall on us, or any number of dumb and ridiculous ways. I thought we all needed a place to vent, and share our horror stories with the world. Chances are looking back could be a good laugh, and they're sure to amuse those fortunate enough to not be a part of it. It's stupid, yes, but here it is nonetheless.

So I'll start: today while working out I was doing deadlifts. I workout at home, and only have dumbells, so I have to be more controlled in my movements to keep the weight from sliding inward or outward my legs. Well I wasn't so careful today, and the two outer plates came together on my manhood. Needless to say, this was not very pleasant, and has reinstated the notion that form is everything.
 
Hahahahahahahaha.

*looks around*

I have done the same thing. Really any times you hit your spheres on accident makes you curse life and hate yourself for being an idiot. Same when you bite your finger while eating.
 
One of my guitars snapped a string this morning. Normally, this wouldn't be such a big deal, but the string snapped and somehow whacked my finger, stabbing it momentarily. No different than getting pricked by a needle, but still, blood was shed in the name of rock and roll.
 
[quote name='blindinglights']I hate it when this happens.[/QUOTE]

I hate that it swells up, so you bite it more, and it scabs over but continues to swell, so you KEEP BITING IT, AND IT HURTS LIKE HELL, JUST MOVING YOUR MOUTH HURTS, ZOMBIE fuckSHITTING CHRIST.
 
[quote name='FlyingAce39']One of my guitars snapped a string this morning. Normally, this wouldn't be such a big deal, but the string snapped and somehow whacked my finger, stabbing it momentarily. No different than getting pricked by a needle, but still, blood was shed in the name of rock and roll.[/QUOTE]

:headache:I've had that happen. I'm always nervous when putting new ones on that they're going to snap off into my face:hot:
 
[quote name='MrNinjaSquirrel']:headache:I've had that happen. I'm always nervous when putting new ones on that they're going to snap off into my face:hot:[/QUOTE]

Putting the strings on mine is usually pretty straight up, but I do also worry about it. I usually tighten them up slowly, just in case.
 
[quote name='Strell']I hate that it swells up, so you bite it more, and it scabs over but continues to swell, so you KEEP BITING IT, AND IT HURTS LIKE HELL, JUST MOVING YOUR MOUTH HURTS, ZOMBIE fuckSHITTING CHRIST.[/QUOTE]
That pretty much sums up my experience as well.:lol:
 
[quote name='MrNinjaSquirrel']
So I'll start: today while working out I was doing deadlifts. I workout at home, and only have dumbells, so I have to be more controlled in my movements to keep the weight from sliding inward or outward my legs. Well I wasn't so careful today, and the two outer plates came together on my manhood. Needless to say, this was not very pleasant, and has reinstated the notion that form is everything.[/QUOTE]

I only use dumbbells too - but they are the fixed weight kind, so safe on that front.
 
[quote name='Strell']I hate that it swells up, so you bite it more, and it scabs over but continues to swell, so you KEEP BITING IT, AND IT HURTS LIKE HELL, JUST MOVING YOUR MOUTH HURTS, ZOMBIE fuckSHITTING CHRIST.[/QUOTE]


You get scabs in your mouth?
 
Couldn't get my Genesis to power on when I was about 10, so I decided to blow on the power cord.

While it was still plugged into the wall. I saw the electricity arc from the end of the adapter to my tongue.
 
[quote name='JJSP']Couldn't get my Genesis to power on when I was about 10, so I decided to blow on the power cord.

While it was still plugged into the wall. I saw the electricity arc from the end of the adapter to my tongue.[/QUOTE]

Neat! Did it give you any superhuman powers?
 
If I'm walking around without shows in my warm up pants with zippers at the bottom I sometimes step on them when zipped all the way down and it hurts like a bastard.


Also, every other time I take a dumb my legs fall asleep (icve named it zombie legs) and then I have to walk like the zombies on The Walking Dead till the feeling comes back.
 
Anytime you catch your dick while zippering your pants. You'd think once would be more than enough to learn.
 
[quote name='keithp']Neat! Did it give you any superhuman powers?[/QUOTE]
I can taste colors now.

Also, I nearly bit my bottom lip off while climbing up one of those kiddie pool slides on my hands and knees when I was four. Legs slid out from under me, chin hit the plastic, and bingo - matching scars on the inside of my bottom lip. Another 1/8" or so and I'd have gone clean through.
 
[quote name='mitch079']Anytime you catch your dick while zippering your pants. You'd think once would be more than enough to learn.[/QUOTE]

This x100.
 
Maybe not as bad as catching my dick between two dumbbells but:

My pinky toes must have their own gravitational field. They're constantly drawing in chairs, shelves, walls stools, etc. And it just doesn't happen once, they have to get stubbed like 2 or 3 times in same 48 hour period.
 
Few years ago was helping my son with his pinewood derby car for cub scouts. Was drilling out the bottom to add weight. Ran the drill right through the car, into my hand. Almost went through the hand too. Luckily did not hit bone.
 
So I survived testicular cancer. Inside of my thigh is numb even three months after surgery now. It feels weird when I run. Kind of like jock itch, but underneath the skin. Doctor says its likely permanent. FML
 
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