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MOTHER SHAQ-FU-ER! The pains of day to day life.


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#1 MrNinjaSquirrel

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Posted 19 March 2013 - 10:29 PM

We all have those moments, when we accidentally inflict pain on ourselves through some stupid and probably avoidable circumstance. Maybe it's stepping on a Lego, or having our game shelf fall on us, or any number of dumb and ridiculous ways. I thought we all needed a place to vent, and share our horror stories with the world. Chances are looking back could be a good laugh, and they're sure to amuse those fortunate enough to not be a part of it. It's stupid, yes, but here it is nonetheless.

So I'll start: today while working out I was doing deadlifts. I workout at home, and only have dumbells, so I have to be more controlled in my movements to keep the weight from sliding inward or outward my legs. Well I wasn't so careful today, and the two outer plates came together on my manhood. Needless to say, this was not very pleasant, and has reinstated the notion that form is everything.

Hey, you look like you have a lot of money; how about donating some of it to my Extra Life drive?


#2 Predator21281

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Posted 20 March 2013 - 01:36 AM

Hahahahahahahaha.

*looks around*

I have done the same thing. Really any times you hit your spheres on accident makes you curse life and hate yourself for being an idiot. Same when you bite your finger while eating.
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#3 granturismo

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Posted 20 March 2013 - 02:12 AM

Ouch

#4 keithp

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Posted 20 March 2013 - 04:26 AM

I bit my inner cheek while eating today.

#5 blindinglights

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Posted 20 March 2013 - 02:16 PM

I bit my inner cheek while eating today.



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#6 FlyingAce39

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Posted 20 March 2013 - 02:44 PM

One of my guitars snapped a string this morning. Normally, this wouldn't be such a big deal, but the string snapped and somehow whacked my finger, stabbing it momentarily. No different than getting pricked by a needle, but still, blood was shed in the name of rock and roll.

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#7 Strell

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Posted 20 March 2013 - 02:49 PM

I hate it when this happens.


I hate that it swells up, so you bite it more, and it scabs over but continues to swell, so you KEEP BITING IT, AND IT HURTS LIKE HELL, JUST MOVING YOUR MOUTH HURTS, ZOMBIE FUCKSHITTING CHRIST.


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#8 MrNinjaSquirrel

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Posted 20 March 2013 - 02:50 PM

One of my guitars snapped a string this morning. Normally, this wouldn't be such a big deal, but the string snapped and somehow whacked my finger, stabbing it momentarily. No different than getting pricked by a needle, but still, blood was shed in the name of rock and roll.


:headache:I've had that happen. I'm always nervous when putting new ones on that they're going to snap off into my face:hot:

Hey, you look like you have a lot of money; how about donating some of it to my Extra Life drive?


#9 FlyingAce39

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Posted 20 March 2013 - 02:52 PM

:headache:I've had that happen. I'm always nervous when putting new ones on that they're going to snap off into my face:hot:


Putting the strings on mine is usually pretty straight up, but I do also worry about it. I usually tighten them up slowly, just in case.

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#10 Clak

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Posted 20 March 2013 - 02:56 PM

I hate that it swells up, so you bite it more, and it scabs over but continues to swell, so you KEEP BITING IT, AND IT HURTS LIKE HELL, JUST MOVING YOUR MOUTH HURTS, ZOMBIE FUCKSHITTING CHRIST.

That pretty much sums up my experience as well.:lol:
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#11 Pookymeister

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Posted 20 March 2013 - 05:54 PM

So I'll start: today while working out I was doing deadlifts. I workout at home, and only have dumbells, so I have to be more controlled in my movements to keep the weight from sliding inward or outward my legs. Well I wasn't so careful today, and the two outer plates came together on my manhood. Needless to say, this was not very pleasant, and has reinstated the notion that form is everything.


I only use dumbbells too - but they are the fixed weight kind, so safe on that front.


#12 blindinglights

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Posted 21 March 2013 - 02:26 AM

I hate that it swells up, so you bite it more, and it scabs over but continues to swell, so you KEEP BITING IT, AND IT HURTS LIKE HELL, JUST MOVING YOUR MOUTH HURTS, ZOMBIE FUCKSHITTING CHRIST.



You get scabs in your mouth?
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#13 pitfallharry219

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Posted 21 March 2013 - 02:46 AM

I've smashed my dick with the under-sink cabinet door in my bathroom more times than I care to admit. Now that hurts.

#14 JJSP

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Posted 21 March 2013 - 04:07 AM

Couldn't get my Genesis to power on when I was about 10, so I decided to blow on the power cord.

While it was still plugged into the wall. I saw the electricity arc from the end of the adapter to my tongue.

#15 keithp

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Posted 21 March 2013 - 04:09 AM

Couldn't get my Genesis to power on when I was about 10, so I decided to blow on the power cord.

While it was still plugged into the wall. I saw the electricity arc from the end of the adapter to my tongue.


Neat! Did it give you any superhuman powers?

#16 Malik112099

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Posted 21 March 2013 - 04:09 AM

If I'm walking around without shows in my warm up pants with zippers at the bottom I sometimes step on them when zipped all the way down and it hurts like a bastard.


Also, every other time I take a dumb my legs fall asleep (icve named it zombie legs) and then I have to walk like the zombies on The Walking Dead till the feeling comes back.

#17 mitch079

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Posted 21 March 2013 - 04:20 AM

Anytime you catch your dick while zippering your pants. You'd think once would be more than enough to learn.

#18 JJSP

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Posted 21 March 2013 - 06:34 AM

Neat! Did it give you any superhuman powers?

I can taste colors now.

Also, I nearly bit my bottom lip off while climbing up one of those kiddie pool slides on my hands and knees when I was four. Legs slid out from under me, chin hit the plastic, and bingo - matching scars on the inside of my bottom lip. Another 1/8" or so and I'd have gone clean through.

#19 pacifickarma

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Posted 21 March 2013 - 07:28 AM

Anytime you catch your dick while zippering your pants. You'd think once would be more than enough to learn.


This x100.

#20 SilentBob50023

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Posted 21 March 2013 - 10:06 AM

Wicked paper cut going through my tax documents.

#21 Rodimus

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Posted 21 March 2013 - 05:37 PM

Maybe not as bad as catching my dick between two dumbbells but:

My pinky toes must have their own gravitational field. They're constantly drawing in chairs, shelves, walls stools, etc. And it just doesn't happen once, they have to get stubbed like 2 or 3 times in same 48 hour period.

#22 csidegamer

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Posted 21 March 2013 - 09:02 PM

Few years ago was helping my son with his pinewood derby car for cub scouts. Was drilling out the bottom to add weight. Ran the drill right through the car, into my hand. Almost went through the hand too. Luckily did not hit bone.
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#23 MrNinjaSquirrel

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Posted 07 April 2013 - 10:27 PM

burnt the whole left side of my hand today while poring the water for my tea:hot:I just get clumsier everyday it seems:whee:

Hey, you look like you have a lot of money; how about donating some of it to my Extra Life drive?


#24 ECisMe

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Posted 07 April 2013 - 11:30 PM

So I survived testicular cancer. Inside of my thigh is numb even three months after surgery now. It feels weird when I run. Kind of like jock itch, but underneath the skin. Doctor says its likely permanent. FML

Edited by ECisMe, 07 April 2013 - 11:52 PM.