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Japanese Nintendo DS Manual: What you shouldn't do with your DS!


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62 replies to this topic

#31 Redeema

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Posted 14 December 2005 - 01:15 AM

*Clears off tear from face* Too funny.

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#32 Spacepest

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Posted 22 December 2005 - 12:31 PM

And I thought America had too many warning lables...



ROFLMAO. Not only do they have labels, they have PICTURES. Ooooooooooooooo.
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#33 Requiem

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Posted 23 December 2005 - 10:12 AM

LOL great thread

#34 Zmonkay

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Posted 23 December 2005 - 02:10 PM

LOL, wow, don't know how I missed this one. Great stuff.
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#35 Kaijufan

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Posted 24 December 2005 - 05:15 AM

I also missed this when Cheapy first posted it. Those are great. :lol:
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#36 katzd2007

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Posted 06 January 2006 - 02:39 PM

wow thats funny
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#37 moojuice

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Posted 12 January 2006 - 07:20 PM

Wait, your not supposed it put it in your back pocket?

#38 banpeikun

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Posted 13 February 2006 - 08:31 PM

just saw these warnings today. man, too hilarious. that's really in the official DS manual? i'm going to go bust out my manual from my import and check when i go home.
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#39 EldritchOnRye

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Posted 10 March 2006 - 03:18 PM

Oh man, just got linked to this from Kotaku talking about the Lites warnings. Now how am I supposed to wait patiently for my Lite when it's going to be ten fold this?!?!

That and I want to know why the Japanese reward the first people in line with sitting on the cement when everyone else got nicey comfy folding chairs? Are they just jerks like that? Were they really homeless folks that just happened to nap there and people started forming a line behind them? If the later's the case I can see why there's a warning against eating the stylus.

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#40 gmunchkin

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Posted 24 September 2006 - 11:34 PM

why the Fuck does nintendo not allow you to put the ds in ur back pocket?
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#41 icruise

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Posted 02 October 2006 - 09:57 AM

Because if you sit on it, you'll break it?

#42 RegalSin2020

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Posted 02 October 2006 - 01:51 PM

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revenge of the Assembler from China or Toxic Fumes?


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Okay now my brain says do it thanks alot.


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Dumb Nintendog owners.

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Playing GTA then driving is more dangerous

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Obvious and the same for small animals. They should have a picture of a Bird taking a dunk on the NDS in mid flight or a dog biting it.

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Did this with my GBA tons of times by ignorance.


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The NDS would come apart not kidding you. Imagine flinging a NDS or Gameboy out the window head first.


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Warning for kids again and Bukkake hoars. Then again that stlyus might have been elsewhere.

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Well I do play like this sometimes in the past. I think the Gameboy gave me static electricity.

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I had my GBA SP in my pants pocket and left it in there over night. THe next day my GBA had scratch marks all over the case from the pants. MY Gameboy was much better. Then again Asians walk around in velvet running pants all the time which is nicer on the skin.

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Don't rape the NDS screen people thats what the stylus is for

#43 Stunt

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Posted 02 October 2006 - 08:45 PM

Thats hilarious. I love Japan.
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#44 maigoyume

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Posted 04 October 2006 - 02:41 AM

why the Fuck does nintendo not allow you to put the ds in ur back pocket?

watch this, and it shall all become clear


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#45 RegalSin2020

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Posted 04 October 2006 - 07:16 AM

Well that never answered any questions but some strange reason I want that game. The NDS has a Microphone wow and I missed that auction for a $55 NDS with Lunar Dragopn Song:bomb:

#46 maigoyume

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Posted 04 October 2006 - 03:42 PM

Well that never answered any questions but some strange reason I want that game. The NDS has a Microphone wow and I missed that auction for a $55 NDS with Lunar Dragopn Song:bomb:

lunar dragon song was apparently a very bad game, some of the mechanics in it were really weird like losing health as you run
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#47 RegalSin2020

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Posted 06 October 2006 - 05:38 AM

lunar dragon song was apparently a very bad game, some of the mechanics in it were really weird like losing health as you run


Well the reason why you lose health is the fact when you run your body sweats and you will never see people running around in armor or heavy gear.
In the original Lunar all they did was walk here and walk there. It was annoying but then again if they made the characters run here and there then the realism of the game would have been dimished.

#48 Chacrana

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Posted 06 October 2006 - 03:02 PM

Well the reason why you lose health is the fact when you run your body sweats and you will never see people running around in armor or heavy gear.
In the original Lunar all they did was walk here and walk there. It was annoying but then again if they made the characters run here and there then the realism of the game would have been dimished.


Dragons are realistic though as is the song that those dragons happen to enjoy.

it was probably in there because I'm a flaming homosexual.


#49 NintendoArielle

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Posted 18 March 2007 - 10:53 PM

And to think I did all of those in the manual. #-o

#50 sfriedlander

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Posted 19 March 2007 - 07:04 AM

LOL thats hella funny. I bet for 4 the xbox 360 they have one that is a picture of a person frying eggs on a overheated xbox 360.

#51 vivafriend5

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Posted 19 March 2007 - 11:54 PM

Too funny!

#52 machoman_93

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Posted 20 March 2007 - 12:20 AM

lol taking ds in bed is my favorite.


#53 Prima

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Posted 22 March 2007 - 11:35 AM

lmao...

#54 FAN8228

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Posted 02 May 2007 - 07:09 PM

hahaha...

#55 SL4IN

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Posted 02 May 2007 - 09:58 PM

but what if my ds needs to use the bathroom? I didn't see any instructions for that :|
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#56 anubaph

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Posted 13 August 2007 - 02:31 PM

Don't put it in you back pocket???

#57 Xrazor

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Posted 13 August 2007 - 04:39 PM

Very nice and Funny, favorite was teh PSP One =)

#58 nailz_jaggzy

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Posted 09 September 2007 - 12:00 AM

hilarious i love the dont remove tags on the end of beds remove them now!

#59 Samicom

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Posted 27 September 2007 - 02:34 AM

Why didn't anyone tell me sooner!? First I accidentally threw my DS into a fire, then I tried to put it out with a glass of water, and then when I was drying it off my thumb broke through the screen.

#60 Chibi Celina

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Posted 29 November 2007 - 06:45 AM

As I mentioned on one of the CAGcasts, the Japanese Nintendo DS manual sure has a lot of warnings...9 pages of them to be exact.
Since I can't read Japanese too well, I figured I'd just give it my best guess:



Posted ImageWhile a fire looks like a good place to store your Nintendo DS, you may want to consider one of the officially licensed Nintendo cases.


Posted Image If you see this, you have awoken the Genie of the DS!
He's probably pissed off that we made him manufacture these in China for 10 cents an hour. Run away!



Posted ImageThe DS's power cord is too short to be used as effective nunchucks. Instead, Nintendo recommends attaching the DS the the handle of a katana.



Posted ImageIf you DS gets thirsty, be sure to use a straw. He's a sloppy motherfucker.



Posted Image Playing the DS while driving is distracting.
You may find yourself doing odd things like driving on the wrong side of the car.



Posted Image Be sure to keep your DS in close reach of your children.
You wouldn't want your kids straining themselves when they want to play Animal Crossing or take a piss on your DS.



Posted ImageBe sure to use 2 DSs' when attempting to rollerskate.
Using one is just stupid.



Posted Image If your are going to throw your DS out the window, make sure pick a suitable target like your friends' head.
Pretty much anything other than the sidewalk will do.



Posted ImageWhile the DS stylus is tasty, its a much better fit up your nose, or even better, inside your eyelid.



Posted ImageDon't try to bed the DS without taking it out for an expensive meal. Its not a slut like the PSP.



Posted ImagePutting only one DS in your back pocket will make your ass look really weird. Go with two for that Jennifer Lopez look.



Posted Image Posted ImagePushing your fingers through the DS will likely give you some kind of super-human powers ala Electro.
Do not do so unless you can handle the responsibility.


How odd?