Chuck responds to fact generator...

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Apossum

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AND THE LORD SAID....buy my book

http://www.chucknorris.com/html/events.aspx

IN RESPONSE TO THE "RANDOM FACTS" THAT ARE BEING GENERATED ON THE INTERNET

I'm aware of the made up declarations about me that have recently begun to appear on the Internet and in emails as "Chuck Norris facts." I've seen some of them. Some are funny. Some are pretty far out. Being more a student of the Wild West than the wild world of the Internet, I'm not quite sure what to make of it. It's quite surprising. I do know that boys will be boys, and I neither take offense nor take these things too seriously. Who knows, maybe these made up one-liners will prompt young people to seek out the real facts as found in my recent autobiographical book, "Against All Odds?" They may even be interested enough to check out my novels set in the Old West, "The Justice Riders," released this month. I'm very proud of these literary efforts.
~ Chuck Norris
Click to expand...
 
I once heard that Chuck Norris gave up professional acting because he just flipped out and killed everyone on the set of Walker Texas Ranger because the black guy brought him a raspberry-filled donut when he specifically asked for strawberry.

I suppose when you orgasm everytime you kick like he does, it gives you a big incentive to keep kicking.
 
[quote name='Dr Mario Kart']Whats the internet? Buy my book[/quote]

:rofl:

Like Isiah Thomas and his candybars, or more recently his crazy trades.

Chuck Norris, what a gem. Soon he'll be using the publicity to pimp out his total gym.
 
[quote name='Zenithian Legend']Chuck Norris, what a gem. Soon he'll be using the publicity to pimp out his total gym.[/quote]

He can't. He's in hiding. Chuck Norris is wanted by the CIA for crimes against humanity, and all of his Total Gym commercials are indirectly broadcasted through a satellite on Wayne Knight's back (he's that fat). They superimpose Christie Brinkley's face on Eric Robert's body, whom Chuck is holding hostage.
 
Pretty sure that's more a response from Chuck's publicist than from the man himself. Too bad they didn't get creative and fashion some sort of response in the vein of a Chuck Norris fact or two. Could've been classic.

Heck, Jaket's line would have been great.

[quote name='Jaket']Chuck Norris doesn't respond to facts... facts respond to him[/QUOTE]

[quote name='The Dord']And the site is down.. Wonder what happened?[/QUOTE]

Wow, I wonder what's the story with that? Think the owner let his domain registration lapse? Actually I don't think that's it, but if you do a whois lookup:

Registrar: DOTSTER
Domain Name: CHUCKNORRISFACTS.COM
Created on: 20-DEC-05
Expires on: 20-DEC-06
Last Updated on: 24-FEB-06

So something was updated yesterday? Maybe it's moving servers or something, I'm not too up on what that would mean.
 
Everybody knows there's no such thing as the Easter Bunny, Santa Claus, or the Tooth Fairy...Chuck Norris took care of that.
 
"Jack Bauer tried to use his detailed knowledge of torture techniques, but to no avail: Chuck Norris thrives on pain. Chuck Norris then ripped off Jack Bauer's arm and beat him to death with it. Game, set, match."
 
Chuck Norris once made a pronounciation mistake on aspergers disease. The disease was so ashamed that it went into recession, and nobody has had it since.
 
Found the "ONE" weakness of Chuck Norris

chuck34bt.gif
 
Chuck Norris wears a live rattlesnake as a condom.
Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
 
[quote name='Jaket']Jack Bauer doesn't respond to facts... facts respond to him[/QUOTE]

Please... get your facts straight as we all know Jack Bauer > Chuck Norris. :D
 
[quote name='The Dord']Found the "ONE" weakness of Chuck Norris

chuck34bt.gif
[/quote]

This is merely a stunt double placed in Chuck's standzone to make people assume he isn't invincible.

Chuck Norris can make anyone look like him.
 
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