Can't believe I was blessed by Satan....

LoganDX

CAGiversary!
Feedback
1 (100%)
Well I went to see my friend at work. As I was leaving this 40 some year old guy came in and I thought he was a little on the wacky side. We will call him Satan. He was dressed all in black, had metal shin plates on, used a walking stick. He had 4 small spikes thru the bridge of his nose, some kind of spikes out of his nostrils and what appeared to be metallic fangs sticking out of his mouth. He wore a necklace that was in reality a knife in a sheath. I told my friend I would hang around since he was the only one working. Satan walks around with his kid and who I assume is his g/f or wife.

He finally picks up a "Doors" cd and proclaims to me, my friend and the few other customers that he was buying it because the Doors had something to say unlike anything else out now. He ranted about today's world. Satan said he was on his way to Kentucky for a violent drug run. He was gonna listen to the cd all the way down. He looked at my friend and said to him "But you don't care about me. You just hope I buy this damn CD!" My friend looked at Satan and told him he was wrong, it was the owner that didn't care. Satan asked my friend if he "loved him?" My friend told him he didn't know him. That quieted Satan down for a sec.

My friend rings up Satan's cd. As he does this, Satan looks at us and says "Ahh, victims of the McDonald's culture. It must be rough on you." Yeah insulting but fuck him. He looks at me and says "You're an angry man." I replied "You haven't seen angry, yet."

He went on another tirade about the world and how tough it must be to have to work and pay bills unlike him who gets a monthly government check. He tells me it's okay to be angry, he's pissed off at the world. He looks at me and tells me "You're afraid to let out your true self, to be who you truely are. You know if you do, it means a jail sentence in your future!"

Then he goes on about passive resistance and the what not. My size gets brought back up (this time by me). He says something about McDonald's again. I'm tired of him so I told him "I don't eat McDonald's. I was bio-engineered this way." He's confused so I tell him my mom took these pills from this government test before I was born. Shortly after, She became pregnant. So my size is all this big government conspiracy. That's when the conversation became very, very disturbing.

He called my mother a bitch (which pissed me off) and said that it was okay, Did I want to know what he wanted to do to his mother? I can 't repeat what he said but needless to say it involved bloodshed. a bible and several black men. *shudder* I felt very dirty.

When he saw that I wasn't giving him the satisfaction, he said he liked me and bless me. I said that they gave up blessing me a long time ago so save it. He looked at me, raised his hand and said to me "By the powers of Satan, I bless you." On his hand- an upside down pentagram carved into his palm.

He did this all while the kid and woman stood there. How do you submit a child to that? I takes alot to disturb me but this guy was so into his own ideals that he believed them to the core.

Yes I can be the ladle that stirs the pot so to speak to stir shit up. And normally I would have told him to jam his ideals up his ass and leave but this guy was damn sure different. Right now I'm more shook up over what he said about his mother. NO I don't really believe he was Satan in mortal guise. I felt bad for the kid and the others that had to witness this.

Anyone have this kind of weirdness happen to them?.....
 
[quote name='Moxio']He blessed you?

Man, this could go on my all-time highs of Weirdest Conversations.[/quote]

why thank you...
 
At least when someone like that is spotted approaching you a chance to size up nearby objects for their effectiveness as weapons. Somebody like Dahmer is effectively invisible.
 
Shit, E.D.P.'s (emotionaly disturbed persons) are the best! The crap they spew out is classic. You can really have a blast with them. I noticed that they seem to come out more at night.

I can relate to you though man, because I seem to attract wackos myself.

But, on the plus side, there a sure fire way to pass some time, during a otherwise uneventful day.

Hey, congrats on being blessed by Satan and tell us when you run into someone who thinks he's the Pope.
 
wow loganDX......i would be scarred shitless if i were you.........that is really fucked up and i certainly would have told him to fuck off if i were you..........but those goths are crazy..........but some of those goth chicks are hott
 
[quote name='pimp_daddy_smurf']wow loganDX......i would be scarred shitless if i were you.........that is really shaq-fued up and i certainly would have told him to shaq-fu off if i were you..........but those goths are crazy..........but some of those goth chicks are hott[/quote]

Like I said normally I would have but this guy seemed like he wanted that, ya know? Like he wanted conflict. I gave him some subtle shit but yeah I wanted to throttle him. Until he blessed me then I wanted some holy water....
 
The only way I can think to counter something like that is to act like you're crazier than him. Start talking to a pretend invisible friend or something, or keep fidgeting and look right and left every half a minute as if someone's coming for you.

That would be a hoot.
 
[quote name='Supernothing']He's on his way here? I'm gonna go on a satan hunt tonight.

*EDIT* I'm in Kentucky[/quote] sorry but yeah he said he was on his way there. If you see him, ask him about the bio-engineering going on in Indiana :D ...
 
Holy shit man. I've had somehting like that happen to me before, of course it wasn't a long conversation:

Some of my friends had rented a hotel suite to throw a party. I was getting kind of bored with it and decided to go for a walk. Well, I was walking down the street to go to get some fast food when this greasy guy wearing black steps out of the alley and bumps into me. I mumble "Excuse me" and he's like
"Hey you."
I stop, and look up at him and he's like:
"Yeah, I thought so. You're full of hate aren't you? You fucking sadist." and he walks down a few buildings and slips back into another alley. Never saw him again. I'm just glad I wans't mugged.
 
Reality's Fringe said:
Holy shit man. I've had somehting like that happen to me before, of course it wasn't a long conversation:

Some of my friends had rented a hotel suite to throw a party. I was getting kind of bored with it and decided to go for a walk. Well, I was walking down the street to go to get some fast food when this greasy guy wearing black steps out of the alley and bumps into me. I mumble "Excuse me" and he's like
"Hey you."
I stop, and look up at him and he's like:
"Yeah, I thought so. You're full of hate aren't you? You shaq-fuing sadist." and he walks down a few buildings and slips back into another alley. Never saw him again. I'm just glad I wans't mugged.

a sadist, huh? Yeah you're lucky you didn't get mugged fer sure....
 
bread's done
Back
Top