funniest thing you've heard a kid say....

The Successful Dropout

The Successful Dropout

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kids say the darndest things.... :roll: .....seriously though, sometimes they do...

i took my 6 yr old nephew to get a snowball the other day and we both got marshmallow on top...while he was eating his, he came out of nowhere and said, "yo, theres only one thing better then marshmallow....(paused)....nothing" lmao....

sometimes hearing kids say crazy things are the type of jokes that you have to be there for or you have to know the person to understand....so maybe that was only funny to me, but i thought it was one of the funniest things i've ever heard....what are some crazy/funny things you've heard kids say???
 
[quote name='Grave_Addiction'][quote name='mousin']"where do babies come from"[/quote]

I got that one from my kids just last week! :^o[/quote]


Well don't keep us waiting - what's the answer?
 
[quote name='Grave_Addiction'][quote name='Mr Unoriginal']"Are you sure it's ok to take these pictures of me with no clothes on?"[/quote]
:shock:[/quote]

:P + :shock:
 
[quote name='eldad9'][quote name='Grave_Addiction'][quote name='mousin']"where do babies come from"[/quote]

I got that one from my kids just last week! :^o[/quote]


Well don't keep us waiting - what's the answer?[/quote]

From mommies tummy! Well, I guess it really wasn't a lie.
 
[quote name='Grave_Addiction'][quote name='mousin']"where do babies come from"[/quote]

I got that one from my kids just last week! :^o[/quote]

Just tell them that kids are downloaded off of the internet or maybe from ebay.


My gf's 4 year old sister:

"little help here"

now, she said this while standing tip toed on a chair that was tilting back on 2 legs about to fall. With one hand she was eating an ice cream and the other one was busy holding up a giant stack of books on the top shelf of the dresser that were about to fall. All she wanted was the book right in the middle of the stack :roll:
 
[quote name='godhatesjustyou']"nigga, cover me, i'm about to get my bazooka."[/quote]

godhatesjustyou, that line is gold! i'm gonna keep that on my computer and save it for the rainy days, lol!
 
I used to love that Cosby show "Kids say the darndest things" or whatever it was.. always some hilarious comments.

edit - My three year old sister (at the time) having been told by my mother to turn off the tv.. "I don't think so, you're in my world now"... I fell out of my chair.
 
[quote name='godhatesjustyou']"nigga, cover me, i'm about to get my bazooka."[/quote]



ahaahhahaha did you get that from entensity? the CS thing? HAHAHAHAHAA "gimme yo gun!!! n*gga i say drop that damn gun!!!, OH N*GGA IM ABOUT TO GET MY BAZOOKA!!"
 
[quote name='mousin'][quote name='godhatesjustyou']"nigga, cover me, i'm about to get my bazooka."[/quote]



ahaahhahaha did you get that from entensity? the CS thing? HAHAHAHAHAA "gimme yo gun!!! n*gga i say drop that damn gun!!!, OH N*GGA IM ABOUT TO GET MY BAZOOKA!!"[/quote]

I tried keeping my laughter in at work but my co-workers wondered why i was smiling so much.
 
my dude's cuz who he is 4 said

damn baby where did you get all that ass from holla at me later.

we were dying laughing and trying to get ol girls phone number she was bad a fu*k damn it she just kept laughing and walking away we were serious she was not.
 
9-10 years or so in a cyber cafe.


"Oh ya!! Your body's a Wonderland!!!"


We were all playing counter stirke and a guy named "URBODYSAWONDERLAND" won the round for them. [/b]
 
Ok. Here's my funny kid story.

My mother has been raising my five newphew for about two years now. He's the only child in the house and he gets lonely sometimes. So one day he asks my mother to have a baby so he has someone to play with. The conversation continued as follows:

"Oh Nathan, I am sorry but I can't have babies anymore."

"Yes you can Nana."

"Oh sweetheart, I'm to old to have babies."

'Oh yes you can Nana. You have big boobs!"
 
This is my brother about 11 years ago, so we'll call him 8 on an airplane, sitting next to this hot mid 20-something lady.

Can I have a piece of paper?
Lady, "sure"
Can I have a pen?
Lady, "of course" I'm sure she figured he wanted to draw a picture or something
Can I have your number?
Lady, "I've heard some good ones, but that has to be the most original."

He didn't get the # though
 
[quote name='Zenithian Legend']This is my brother about 11 years ago, so we'll call him 8 on an airplane, sitting next to this hot mid 20-something lady.

Can I have a piece of paper?
Lady, "sure"
Can I have a pen?
Lady, "of course" I'm sure she figured he wanted to draw a picture or something
Can I have your number?
Lady, "I've heard some good ones, but that has to be the most original."

He didn't get the # though[/quote]

That is a good one. Gonna have to use that sometime. Oh wait, I'm married already. Too late.
 
I like those commercials where the kids would say stuff like my mommy made my daddy get a new secratery, or my daddy had to sleep on the couch last night.
 
The other day, my g/f and I were having dinner and there was a woman with her 2 kids sitting behind us. The boy was about 5 or 6 and was recounting a humorous story to his mother. I didn't hear exactly what was happening in the story, the only part I caught was this:

"Me and John did it SO HARD that we made the glass shake!!!"

I almost choked on my food when he said it. The mother actually turned around and asked me if I was ok, and I couldn't tell whether or not she knew that I was laughing at what he said.
 
ah shoot kids are amazing.
mine (2 and a half) was dragging a huge simba stuffed animal by the tail today and turned around and said come on, dont be a cry baby.

my father in law was messing with the tv and said "this stupid tv" my kid runs over all serious with a scowl and says "yea!, that tv really PISSES my off" my fil says whered you hear that, "daddy said it'

he wasnt getting his way with mommy and she asked him to come here, he says "NO" looks at his grama and says "gramas a stupid and mommy's a shut up"
 
heres another story that just came to mind.
my brother and I were at the grocery store looking at items towards the end of an aisle adjacent to the seafood/meat dept.

This older, very redneck voice says, "you kids ever seen one-a-these?
pauses, then, "go ahead you can touch it"
pauses, then, "come on it wont hurt ya"

my brother and I abotu sharded ourselves, look around the corner and there is an older, redneck looking guy a middle aged woman and a boy and girl between 5-7. the guy is holding one of the live lobsters from the holding tank trying to get he kids to touch it.
 
[quote name='paz9x']heres another story that just came to mind.
my brother and I were at the grocery store looking at items towards the end of an aisle adjacent to the seafood/meat dept.

This older, very redneck voice says, "you kids ever seen one-a-these?
pauses, then, "go ahead you can touch it"
pauses, then, "come on it wont hurt ya"

my brother and I abotu sharded ourselves, look around the corner and there is an older, redneck looking guy a middle aged woman and a boy and girl between 5-7. the guy is holding one of the live lobsters from the holding tank trying to get he kids to touch it.[/quote]

Well that's not quite a kids story but still fucking funny nonetheless. :rofl:
 
When my daughter was like three she barged into the bathroom while I was shaving. I was butt naked at the time. She was shocked to see my meat wad and stood motionless staring at it as I grabbed a towel to cover up. I asked her "what do you want honey?" She replied while grasping for the towel now covering me " I want to know what happened to your peaches and why are they all fuzzy "
 
[quote name='snotknocker']When my daughter was like three she barged into the bathroom while I was shaving. I was butt naked at the time. She was shocked to see my meat wad and stood motionless staring at it as I grabbed a towel to cover up. I asked her "what do you want honey?" She replied while grasping for the towel now covering me " I want to know what happened to your peaches and why are they all fuzzy "[/quote]

Hahaha! Peaches! Was that some sort of cute name you and your wife came up with for private parts or did she come up with that one by herself?
 
[quote name='daphatty'][quote name='snotknocker']When my daughter was like three she barged into the bathroom while I was shaving. I was butt naked at the time. She was shocked to see my meat wad and stood motionless staring at it as I grabbed a towel to cover up. I asked her "what do you want honey?" She replied while grasping for the towel now covering me " I want to know what happened to your peaches and why are they all fuzzy "[/quote]

Hahaha! Peaches! Was that some sort of cute name you and your wife came up with for private parts or did she come up with that one by herself?[/quote]

My EX wife came up with peaches as well as nibbies for boobs.
 
I was pushing my little nephew in the mall, he was just starting to speak really, but he broke into "Keep on Rocking in the Free world" that was pretty funny.
 
I don't have any younger siblings (I'm the youngest), so I don't hang around 1-10 year olds. Although, my Mom's told me about things I did or said as a child.
 
[quote name='Mr Unoriginal']"Are you sure it's ok to take these pictures of me with no clothes on?"[/quote]

::chokes on my pink lemonade:: gawd, that was funny...
 
[quote name='trustcompany1013'][quote name='godhatesjustyou']"nigga, cover me, i'm about to get my bazooka."[/quote]

what's a nigga? :?[/quote]

::quietly gets in the car and drives away::
 
[quote name='Grave_Addiction'][quote name='mousin']"where do babies come from"[/quote]

I got that one from my kids just last week! :^o[/quote]
Just don't tell them it comes from drinking a lot of milk like my aunt told me. I stopped drinking milk for a long time...... I did not realize that only women could get pregnant.
 
[quote name='spoo'][quote name='Grave_Addiction'][quote name='mousin']"where do babies come from"[/quote]

I got that one from my kids just last week! :^o[/quote]
Just don't tell them it comes from drinking a lot of milk like my aunt told me. I stopped drinking milk for a long time...... I did not realize that only women could get pregnant.[/quote]

LMFAO!
 
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