What would Jesus buy?

Jesus would voice his disappointment in the commercialization of his message, turn over the product rack, and throw holy water before storming out.
 
[quote name='VioletArrows']Jesus would voice his disappointment in the commercialization of his message, turn over the product rack, and throw holy water before storming out.[/quote]

And be crucified the following week.
 
[quote name='camoor']I can see where holy water would come in handy.

I'll wait for the consumer reports on which brand is the best for vampire extermination.[/quote]
Unfortunately, the vampires won't react to the water in any way. I'd bet about 5% percent of the bottles are actually holy water.
 
[quote name='VioletArrows']Jesus would voice his disappointment in the commercialization of his message, turn over the product rack, and throw holy water before storming out.[/quote]

I remember years ago I was watching a made-for-TV movie on Jesus Christ. He got mad when all these people started setting up shops around the church (or temple...I'm not sure) and he flew in a rage and started to overturning all these vendors tables...

I thought that was pretty cool and badass of him...
 
[quote name='Xevious']I remember years ago I was watching a made-for-TV movie on Jesus Christ. He got mad when all these people started setting up shops around the church (or temple...I'm not sure) and he flew in a rage and started to overturning all these vendors tables...

I thought that was pretty cool and badass of him...[/quote]

Supposedly (I've never read it) he actually does this in the bible. He overturns the booths of those who tried to profit off of religion.

As for the Holy Water, probably directly out of a municipal water supply in the vatican city.
 
[quote name='Anbu_Zim']Time to become atheist.

Think I spelled that right, lulz.[/quote]

*puff of smoke*

Yes, you did. However, you should have added an "an" in there before "atheist" - that is, "Time to become an atheist."

Time to get a new keyboard. The "t" just fell off on mine.
 
[quote name='Xevious']I remember years ago I was watching a made-for-TV movie on Jesus Christ. He got mad when all these people started setting up shops around the church (or temple...I'm not sure) and he flew in a rage and started to overturning all these vendors tables...

I thought that was pretty cool and badass of him...[/quote]

It most certainly wasn't a church, as Christianity didn't exist...:p
 
[quote name='SpazX']It most certainly wasn't a church, as Christianity didn't exist...:p[/quote]

Christianity isn't the only religion with churches. Many religions have places of worship.

It was a temple, by the way.
 
[quote name='thelonepig']Christianity isn't the only religion with churches. Many religions have places of worship.[/quote]

Church is the name given to the building in which Christians worship. For a Muslim it would be a mosque, for a Jew it would be a synagogue, etc.

The word can be used as something more general, but that's a derivative and not how the term came about. I don't believe Xevious was using it in a general non-Christian sense, but I dunno.
 
[quote name='SpazX']The word can be used as something more general, but that's a derivative and not how the term came about.[/quote]

If you want to be ignorant and ethnocentric, sure.
 
[quote name='camoor']If you want to be ignorant and ethnocentric, sure.[/quote]

Actually, church is the general word. At least, according to the dictionary:

church [church] –noun 1.a building for public Christian worship. 13.a place of public worship of a non-Christian religion. 14.any non-Christian religious society, organization, or congregation: the Jewish church.
 
[quote name='thelonepig']Actually, church is the general word. At least, according to the dictionary:

church [church] –noun 1.a building for public Christian worship. 13.a place of public worship of a non-Christian religion. 14.any non-Christian religious society, organization, or congregation: the Jewish church.[/quote]

Coincidentally enough, type "Jewish Church" in the google dictionary, and all the links are either about Messianic Jews (who believe in Jesus and are praying that Jews everywhere can be saved :roll:) or people explaining that the Jewish "church" is called a "temple".

And frankly - if you need an explanation of what a "temple" is and you don't live in a red state, then we are all making fun of you already. ;)
 
[quote name='lilboo']Jesus would have a Wii, he seems like the casual type.[/QUOTE]

he already has, i saw his mii in the parade.
 
[quote name='camoor']Coincidentally enough, type "Jewish Church" in the google dictionary, and all the links are either about Messianic Jews (who believe in Jesus and are praying that Jews everywhere can be saved :roll:) or people explaining that the Jewish "church" is called a "temple".[/quote]

I assume that a 'Messianic Jew' is a Jewish person that converted to Christianity? So Jew in heritage, but not necessarily religious belief.

I do get a kick out of researching religion, but I like to stick to the obscure, goofy religions. Many (10+) years ago, I stumbled on the Presleyterians which preach that you should eat everything but roadkill to "bloat yourself with the spirit of Elvis" and wait for Elvis to descend from the sky in a Cadillac. They also have an annual pilgrimage to Graceland.

[quote name='camoor'] And frankly - if you need an explanation of what a "temple" is and you don't live in a red state, then we are all making fun of you already. ;)[/quote]

What if I live in a red city in a blue state? I dabble very little in the "vs. mode" forum and often find myself forgetting how different the dialogue flows from other parts of the forum. ;)
 
[quote name='thelonepig']
I do get a kick out of researching religion, but I like to stick to the obscure, goofy religions.[/quote]
Ever hear of Sabbatai Zevi?
 
[quote name='The Crotch']Ever hear of Sabbatai Zevi?[/quote]

I have now. :D From what little I just read, the guy sounds like quite the rabblerouser. Thanks!
 
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