When the rapture comes, will your heathen friends know where you went?

alonzomourning23

alonzomourning23

CAGiversary!
Feedback
26 (100%)
edit: I always forget the link http://www.raptureletters.com/

The rapture: When all the believers in Jesus Christ, who have been born again, are
taken up to heaven.

After the rapture, there will be a lot of speculation as to why millions of people have
just disappeared. Unfortunately, after the rapture, only non believers will be left to come up with answers. You probably have family and friends that you have witnessed to and they just won't listen. After the rapture they probably will, but who will tell them?

We have written a computer program to do just that. It will send an Electronic Message (e-mail) to whomever you want after the rapture has taken place, and you and I have been taken to heaven.

How is this accomplished, you might ask. It's a dead man switch that will automatically send the emails when it is not reset.

If you wish to do something now that will help your unbelieving friends and family after the rapture, you need to add those persons email address to our database. Their names will be stored indefinitely and a letter will be sent out to each of them on the first Friday after the rapture. Then they will receive another letter every friday after that.

This rapture letter service is FREE and will hopefully gain the person you send it to an eternity in heaven.

If you would like to see one of the letters which will be sent after the rapture, click here.

This is a personal ministry, if you have any questions or comments please address them to: [email protected]

Thank you and God Bless You!
Click to expand...

Here's an example of the letter

Dear Friend;

This message has been sent to you by a friend or a relative who has recently
disappeared along with millions and millions of people around the world.

The reason they chose to send you this letter is because they cared about you
and would like you to know the truth about where they went.

This may come as a shock to you, but the one who sent you this has been taken
up to heaven.

If you read a Bible, you will see that after chapter three in the book of Revelation,
the church is no longer mentioned as being on earth. (The church are the believers
in Jesus Christ, not the buildings in which people meet.)

In the Bible, 1 Thessalonians Chapter 4 verses 16 and 17 tell how Jesus came
to take away His church. But, you have to believe the Bible is the Word of
God in order to believe this.

I am sure that there will be a lot of speculation as to what happened to all
these people. The theories of some scientists and world leaders will have
so much credibility that most of the world will believe them.

It will sound like the truth!

But, there is only one truth. And, that truth is that Jesus Christ, God in the flesh,
came back to earth and took with Him to Heaven all who believed in Him
and made Him their Lord.

If you would like to give your life to Jesus Christ and be born again, it is
not too late. First you must pray to God saying"Father I admit I am a
sinner, and I will turn from my sin and do good. I believe that Jesus was
your son and that He came here to die for me so that my sins would be
forgiven. I ask you to forgive me and I will repent of my sins. In Jesus
name I pray."

If you just prayed that prayer and meant it with all your heart, then God
will know you as one of His own. You should now seek out others who have
also given their lives to Christ, read a Bible daily, and do your best to
bring others to Christ.

God bless you.
Click to expand...
 
I saw this on the Daily Show...it was pretty funny.

This topic has been moved. Please read the forum descriptions before posting. Thanks!

The preceding message was brought to you by CheapyD and the Cheap Ass Moderators
 
[quote name='alonzomourning23']uhh... why should a joke topic be in the vs forum? There's nothing to argue here.[/quote]

Because the majority of people are only going to read the topic title without reading the OP, not realize that it's a joke, and go bat-shit crazy with the religion talk.
 
[quote name='Ledhed'][quote name='alonzomourning23']uhh... why should a joke topic be in the vs forum? There's nothing to argue here.[/quote]

Because the majority of people are only going to read the topic title without reading the OP, not realize that it's a joke, and go bat-shit crazy with the religion talk.[/quote]

Only if you move it to Vs. mode, where the population possesses a humor deficit. ;)
 
[quote name='sblymnlcrymnl'][quote name='Ledhed'][quote name='alonzomourning23']uhh... why should a joke topic be in the vs forum? There's nothing to argue here.[/quote]

Because the majority of people are only going to read the topic title without reading the OP, not realize that it's a joke, and go bat-shit crazy with the religion talk.[/quote]

Only if you move it to Vs. mode, where the population possesses a humor deficit. ;)[/quote]

Intentional humor at least. The unintentional humor is delicious.
 
Don't you people know that PC stands for Possessed Computers?

LINKY

"I learned that many members of my congregation became in touch with a dark force whenever they used their computers," he said. "Decent, happily married family men were drawn irresistibly to pornographic Web sites and forced to witness unspeakable abominations. "Housewives who had never expressed an impure thought were entering Internet chat rooms and found themselves spewing foul, debasing language they would never use normally," he declared. "One woman wept as she confessed to me, 'I feel when I'm on the computer as if someone else or something else just takes over.'" The minister said he probed one such case, actually logging onto the parishioner's computer himself. To his horror, an artificial-intelligence program started spontaneously. "The program began talking directly to me, openly mocked me," he recalls. "It typed out, 'Preacher, you are a weakling and your God is a damn liar.'" Then the device went haywire and started printing out what looked like gobbledygook. "I later had an expert in dead languages examine the text," the minister said. "It turned out to be a stream of obscenities written in a 2,800-year-old Mesopotamian dialect!" The minister estimates that one in ten computers in America now hosts some type of evil spirit.
Click to expand...
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
bread's done
Back
Top