Have you have hot sauce on your penis?

Beana Blasta

Beana Blasta

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Just recently, my girlfriend and I went on a trip to San Francisco. While we were in our hotel room i told her to get on her knees and to start performing. Right before i told her that, we had ate some mexican food and there happed to be some salsa next to her. so she gets on her knees and starts making me happy, but at the same time i knew something was up, becuase she usually doesnt do what i want whenever i want.

So she puts hot sause/salsa in her mouth and starts giving me oral, i was like " shit, i dont care, as long as i get oral baby". She was very grinny and happy.

So after that i hop straight into the shower, and i yell out " that salsa was a great touch baby!"

but little did i know that it woud start burning like fucking crazy!!! i was like wtf!!! this shit is starting to burn me!!! so i try real hard to soap the slasa off... it took like 5 minutes for the fucking salsa burn to go away!!!


Boy, i leanred my lesson, but at the same time it was worth it.

Has anyone else had this type of experience?
 
[quote name='naes']Man, this thread sucks.[/QUOTE]

I endorse this statement. The story was shitty to begin with, and the poor delivery made it even less appealing than it probably was in reality.
 
I'm not Canadian.


Taco Bell isn't Mexican food.
[quote name='Beana Blasta']do canadians eat mexican food?[/quote]
 
[quote name='nharmon91']The worst Ive had on my dick is Icey Hot, which was a bad idea cause it doesnt come off easy at all.[/quote]

That guy looks like he jerks off with Icey-Hot.
 
I thought the CAG favorite was Gold Bond.
[quote name='Magehart']That guy looks like he jerks off with Icey-Hot.[/quote]
 
i had a bet to do that with icey hot...shit burned forever...and this was right b4 a baseball game i was playing in :(
 
I once had Tiger Balm on my dick... it hurt like hell. I refer to it as the Tiger Balm Tragedy now.
 
"Have you have hotsauce on your penis?"

?

Anyways, it looks like someone just saw the trailer to Van Wilder 2 and put it in his own perspective. The trailer isn't funny, and neither is this.
 
Once I was cutting peppers while cooking so i had the juice on my hands, and then i went to the bathroom, and I was about to pee, i had my fly down and everything, and then I was like "Oh shit, I was recently cutting hot peppers, the juice of which is now on my hands, if I don't wash them, the juice on my hands would come in contact with the sensitive skin on my penis, and that would cause pain" so I washed my hands, then I peed and washed my hands again, you know because I was cooking, and if I didn't that would be a definite breech of sanitation, and i don't want all the people who would be eating my delicious meal to be harmed by my lack of responsibility. Oh, also, I like cookies.
 
[quote name='smalien1']Once I was cutting peppers while cooking so i had the juice on my hands, and then i went to the bathroom, and I was about to pee, i had my fly down and everything, and then I was like "Oh shit, I was recently cutting hot peppers, the juice of which is now on my hands, if I don't wash them, the juice on my hands would come in contact with the sensitive skin on my penis, and that would cause pain" so I washed my hands, then I peed and washed my hands again, you know because I was cooking, and if I didn't that would be a definite breech of sanitation, and i don't want all the people who would be eating my delicious meal to be harmed by my lack of responsibility. Oh, also, I like cookies.[/QUOTE]
I am in awe that you were able to do that in one sentence.
 
[quote name='mvick288']i had a bet to do that with icey hot...shit burned forever...and this was right b4 a baseball game i was playing in :([/quote]
Yeah mine was a bet too. Not to jack off with it, just to put it on.
 
yeah yo, all the time g. I was like "bitch, do a one armed handstand while balancing a taco on your left hand" and she was like "alright baby, lemme jus put sum salsa in my mouf first." and I was all "sounds sexy baby, salsa gets me off" and she went and got the salsa, but insed of pourin it in her mouf she jus pored it down my pants and I was all damn bitch but she still did teh handstand and balanced the taco sit was all good man I jus sed damn bitch your like school in summertime
 
[quote name='mvick288']since this is already way off topic

what do you guys masturbate with? what kind of substances? what material?[/QUOTE]

You've got to be fucking kidding me....
 
[quote name='jPoD']You've got to be fucking kidding me....[/quote]My ignore list is useless when you quote idiots like that, Jpod...
 
[quote name='LiquidNight']My ignore list is useless when you quote idiots like that, Jpod...[/QUOTE]

My bad LN :p
 
I start off with a few eggs. Then, I crack the eggs into a glass. Next, I add some vaseline and add some water. Mix these up real good. Then put it all in a huge condom. Slip the condom on and go at it! Then, when you're done, you can freeze it and use it later. I prefer to make an omelette with it the next morning. Good luck.

If I were you, mvick, I'd bookmark www.jackinworld.com
[quote name='mvick288']what do you guys masturbate with? what kind of substances? what material?[/quote]
 
[quote name='mvick288']since this is already way off topic

what do you guys masturbate with? what kind of substances? what material?[/quote]
...
french-mustard.png_thumb.jpg
 
[quote name='mvick288']come on guys, seriously. what is some good material? pics or vids?[/QUOTE]

Shut up dude.
 
[quote name='naes']I start off with a few eggs. Then, I crack the eggs into a glass. Next, I add some vaseline and add some water. Mix these up real good. Then put it all in a huge condom. Slip the condom on and go at it! Then, when you're done, you can freeze it and use it later. I prefer to make an omelette with it the next morning. Good luck.

If I were you, mvick, I'd bookmark www.jackinworld.com[/quote]

Do you add the shells as well for texture? I hear it's like a whole new experience.
 
[quote name='mvick288']come on guys, seriously. what is some good material? pics or vids?[/QUOTE]

Look, i'm sorry I got pissed before. I'll answer your question. Look up Tubgirl.
 
[quote name='smalien1']Once I was cutting peppers while cooking so i had the juice on my hands, and then i went to the bathroom, and I was about to pee, i had my fly down and everything, and then I was like "Oh shit, I was recently cutting hot peppers, the juice of which is now on my hands, if I don't wash them, the juice on my hands would come in contact with the sensitive skin on my penis, and that would cause pain" so I washed my hands, then I peed and washed my hands again, you know because I was cooking, and if I didn't that would be a definite breech of sanitation, and i don't want all the people who would be eating my delicious meal to be harmed by my lack of responsibility. Oh, also, I like cookies.[/quote]

:rofl:
 
[quote name='jPoD']You've got to be fucking kidding me....[/QUOTE]

I'm still curious as to how mvick isn't banned. He's said some of the most fucked up stuff I've read since DDL, DLF days, and yet he still is able to stay here.
 
had to bump it

"Today, 11:24 PM #12 mvick288
rank0.png


Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 23
Reputation: 10


How good are the masturbators? WHich one is the best model?

This is a serious question

Also, whats a stand? What is some good stuff for the wife
 
[quote name='jPoD']Look, i'm sorry I got pissed before. I'll answer your question. Look up Tubgirl.[/quote]
lemonparty is much more informative however.
 
[quote name='Pookymeister']had to bump it

"Today, 11:24 PM #12 mvick288
rank0.png


Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 23
Reputation: 10


How good are the masturbators? WHich one is the best model?

This is a serious question

Also, whats a stand? What is some good stuff for the wife[/QUOTE]

:shame:
 
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