She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Got these from Post Randomonium. The site has been cracking me up so far though it can take a while to get to some of the good ones.