I need to teach my girlfriend how to drive a stick (manual transmission) | Advice?

All jokes aside I was wondering what the best way was to go about doing this?

I learned at a really early age on things like Go Karts and Tractors and my first few vehicles were all standards.

However my girlfriend has never driven one and we decided to buy a new(er) Nissan Altima 5-Speed. We bought this car specifically for her.

Where I grew up there was very little traffic (small town) so it was pretty much learn as you go.

While the town I currently live in isn't large there is a lot of summer tourist traffic. I figured the best thing to do at first would be to start in a shopping plaza parking lot either early in the morning or late at night and learn from there.

The hardest part for me when I was younger was getting into first and moving without either stalling or riding the clutch. Once she has that down I guess I'd just let her learn by driving during off peak driving hours (again early morning or late at night).

I was wondering if any of you had any tips or cared to share about how you learned and what you thought worked the best.

Thanks

[quote name='GBAstar']
However my girlfriend has never driven one and we decided to buy a new(er) Nissan Altima 5-Speed. We bought this car specifically for her.[/QUOTE]


I'm not joking or making light of your situation, but when i was thinking on what advice to give i was trying to figure out what the attraction to the car for her was if she never drove a stick. That is a very risky investment. There is a chance she won't even like it even when she does learn it.

Moving on...try using a 360 controller and show her the transition of the two triggers as one finger presses down while the other one depresses in a smooth conjunction to give her an idea of the timing of the two pads.

Make sure to tell her for awhile doing simple things like going through Drive Thurs are now a chore (for a rookie on the first few months) and rural neighborhoods with many stop signs.

Good luck in your en-devour. My situation was similar many years ago, i bought a 240SX Nissan with a stick and i never drove one in my life. For me "I had to have it" so that fuled my determination. And that goes back to my original thought with her and this car.

^ We bought it because the price was too good to pass up. The person selling it undervalued the car by a few thousand dollars even if they were looking to get just the low end of the KBB private sale price.

The car looks really nice and drives nice but probably has more power then what she'll need.

I have a subaru outback that I can't let go of because it's been so good to me and handles New England weather so well. That and it is great for hunting/camping/fishing trips. It isn't very sexy though and I figured I'd let my girlfriend pick what she wanted to drive (she needs to upgrade) with little to no influence.

We were going to get a newer Audi or VW passat or something along those lines but were able to get this for considerably less and I figured if she hated it I could drive it until we found something else and then easily resell it and probably still come out on top.

I do agree though... you either love driving a manual transmission or you hate it. Personally I prefer it but wouldn't go out of my way to buy one.

Start/Stop in an traffic-less lot. First gear practice is key and will get her use to the clutch.

[quote name='Canadian_Man']Start/Stop in an traffic-less lot. First gear practice is key and will get her use to the clutch.[/QUOTE]

That's pretty much what I was thinking. I think it is safe to say the hardest thing is getting into 1st gear from a dead stop. Once she's able to do that consistently I think we can do some road/hill work.

Make her drive it home. That's what my dad did when I got my first car which happened to be manual.

[quote name='whoknows']Make her drive it home. That's what my dad did when I got my first car which happened to be manual.[/QUOTE]

With no practice whatsoever? How did you not kill the transmission?

I learned over the course of a few hours in my high school's empty parking lot with my mother giving pointers. Every clutch has a different feel so I would try it out first to give her better advice about when to start letting it out and at what RPM, and how fast. Explain that letting out the clutch and giving the engine gas is a delicate balancing act that will take time to get comfortable with, but with enough practice will become second nature.

By far the biggest challenge while learning manual trans is going from a dead stop into first gear, so practice this first several times until she gets the hang of it. Equally challenging is going from a dead stop into reverse, so this should be next. From there, practice from first to second gear as this can still be done in a parking lot (preferably flat).

Once you move up to third though, it becomes more challenging because you'll need much more room. Empty business park parking lots are good for this -- even better, a warehouse district. Fourth and fifth (assuming it has these) should follow easily once she's comfortable with highway/freeway driving. Downshifting should be the final lesson as it's not essential to the function of driving a manual, but it will extend brake pad life considerably.

After all that, take her up to near the crest of a hill with a decent grade, pull the parking brake, put it into neutral, then swap places and see how she does with getting forward momentum without rolling backwards too much. City driving in San Francisco was a big challenge the first time for me and I was definitely sweating bullets when someone would pull up too close to my rear fender, even with hundreds of hours of manual experience.

And of course, make sure she knows her gear chart. The owner's manual should have a numbers chart recommending speed shift points.

^ Yeah I'd like her to develop good shifting habits to help prolong the life of the clutch, brakes, transmission, better gas mileage etc. so I want to cover all those details about when to shift up/down.

Unlike the Honda's I had growing up the clutch is very soft (not sure if that is the correct way to describe it) so you almost have to release it the full amount before giving it gas.

I think this can be adjusted but IMO it is more difficult then when a clutch is tight and only needs to be released a little before giving it gas.

[quote name='GBAstar']^ Yeah I'd like her to develop good shifting habits to help prolong the life of the clutch, brakes, transmission, better gas mileage etc. so I want to cover all those details about when to shift up/down.

Unlike the Honda's I had growing up the clutch is very soft (not sure if that is the correct way to describe it) so you almost have to release it the full amount before giving it gas.

I think this can be adjusted but IMO it is more difficult then when a clutch is tight and only needs to be released a little before giving it gas.[/QUOTE]

I learned on a really loose clutch which I feel now was easier to learn on compared to a tight one. It'll loosen up over time as it gets used of course. Brand new cars tend to have a super small clutch 'window' so it can be tough to learn on but it'll get better.

Strictly speaking of the psychology angle, tell her there is NO pressure to be perfect. She will probably stall it a bunch of times as well as grind a few gears. Tell her this is inevitable and even the most experienced manual drivers will do this from time to time... I certainly have. Exercise as much patience as you are capable of and refrain from making any negative comments or noises -- she will notice even the most subtle things like gasping, frowning or shaking your head in disappointment and it'll turn into frustration, which you want to avoid as much as possible.

Try to make it a fun experience and she'll be a Danica Patrick in no time.

I agree 100% on the psychological aspect especially on hills or stalling at stop lights.

It feels like an eternity goes by when you stall in traffic with cars behind you and likewise when you start rolling back on a hill it feels like you're rolling back a large distance when in most cases you're talking about a matter of a few inches.

But you're right patience is key.

[quote name='whoknows']Make her drive it home. That's what my dad did when I got my first car which happened to be manual.[/QUOTE]

I promise you GBAstar, this is the only way. Only you can't be in the car with her when she does (you guys will just end up fighting).

My first car was stick and I had no clue how to drive it. My dad trying to teach me failed miserably. (You can't teach somebody to drive stick, they can only learn.) But the car did need a new slave cylinder for the clutch. My uncle across town said he would replace it. So I had to somehow get a car I didn't know how to drive 8 miles away. (And did I mention that the bad slave cylinder meant I had no first gear?) It was a little embarrassing, but trust me, when you're alone on a big road, you focus real hard and learn real quick. I stalled twice on the way there and not at all on the way back. From then on, I could drive it like a champ.

As other's have said, empty parking lot. Feathering in 1st gear and knowing when to up/down shift is what it's all about. My wife learned to drive manual in San Francisco two days before she would start her 30 mile commute on Bay Area highways. I was literally throwing up in the shower out of anxiety after she left. She survived, and so did everyone else on the road, and that clutch never had to be replaced in 13 years, so we must have done alright.

Oh, and that very bad trick, use the E-break on a really steep hill until you engage 1st. Use it VERY sparingly...like if you're in San Francisco.

Yeah, parking lot. Just practice starting it and getting into 1st or 2nd without stalling it.
I had a 5 speed Protege for a while. I practiced by driving on the interstate and hitting all the off/on ramps. It teaches you how to get good at going from 1st to 5th quickly and how to down-shift without launching yourself through the windshield.
Show her how to park the car too. That may seem dumb but when you've only driven automatic you take for granted being able to just put it in Park and not have the car roll away.

Go to a church parking lot on days they are not having service. Then, just be patient as you are teaching her--very patient. She WILL shake the car up, she WILL cause it to die multiple times, and she may accidentally shift to the wrong gear on occasion. It just takes practice and getting a feel for it.
I remember my dad chuckling the first time I killed the engine as he was teaching me how to drive a stick. Seems that he went through the exact same process with his father

Reverse, teach her to get it going in reverse.

Generally speaking reverse is geared higher than first and you will be able to feel it grab better.

Other than that, drive her somewhere, leave, and let her bring it home. It's a Nissan, it can take whatever she gives it.

[quote name='eLefAdEr']With no practice whatsoever? How did you not kill the transmission?
[/QUOTE]

Nope, no practice. He just said "see you at home" and left me.

I somehow got it home with cars honking at me at the traffic lights, then in our little driveway I just practiced going forward and backwards from a stop. Next day I was driving fine.

You are going to all laugh at me, but...

I drove an auto and practiced putting the imaginary clutch in and and releasing the clutch. Just to get used to using my left for for the clutch and my right for the brake and the gas. In addition, while I finally got a stick, I sat in the car with it off and push the clutched pedal down, and practiced moving to the different gears. None of those two things actually help learn the balance between the gas and the clutch, that takes actual driving of the vehicle. For that you can try a parking lot until she gets the hang of it.

I learned many, many years ago. I now drive a 6 speed Mustang 5.0 and I couldn't imagine going back to an auto. I really enjoy driving a manual gearbox.

(the following may or may not be good advice depending on her learning style. you might confuse her with too much information)

when she does it up, make sure you explain to her why. try drawing/finding a diagram of what exactly is happening with the clutch. and just saying "you stalled it" doesn't really help. explain what that means and why it happened. hell, explain what the clutch is!

for me i could not get the hang of it, there was no connection between pushing 2 random pedals and suddenly the car is having a seizure jerking around. it didn't help that the person teaching me also didn't know how a car/engine worked so they couldn't explain it to me. until i looked up what exactly is happening when i'm pushing those two random pedals it was a concept i could not grasp. i had to conceptually build the transmission and connect it with the clutch before it clicked.

The best thing to learn was just finding the sweet spot where the clutch engages. Like others said, learn in an empty parking lot.

Put it in her butt.



(Took this long?)

If she is a more visual learner, I found it helpful to go over the mechanics of the system a bit. It takes the rote memorization of magic "rules" out of learning. When you understand what the clutch is and therefore when to use it, the system feels more natural and less common practices like heel toe for downshift braking, just make sense.

Also, when I first started riding motorcycles, the instructor did this badass thing where he held the bike on full throttle and then forced me to use only the clutch, the catch being I could only go 10mph. When I taught my girlfriend this way, she commented that doing so made her realize that the clutch isn't the scary pedal, its your closest ally when trying to get the other two pedals to operate. Don't know how effective that would be in a car, since motorbike clutches are much easier to modulate, but something to keep in mind...