Four years ago, I had my 24th birthday party at a friend's house. They always bragged me up as the guy who never gets drunk, so a few ladies my friend invited approached me at the party and said, "What would it take to get you drunk?" So I started mixing shots of Jameson and Sailor Jerry's together in a candle holder and drank that for every 1 shot my friends took. I'd say I put in about 25 shots and a few beers within two hours, and it was pretty evident that I drank too much. Those girls knew it too, and they lead me outside into some bushes where one of them tried having her way with me.
I remember a bit of the frisky part, combined with the horrible feeling of projectile vomiting rising from the pit of my stomach. I hadn't been chasing the shots, and I knew throwing up in this girl's face would spell doom. So I tried to get away and immediately tripped. I ended up hearing by word of mouth that the whole scene was like a comedy skit, where I stumbled backwards out of the bushes with my pants around my knees and kept stumbling while flailing my arms until I hit the lip of this unused, unwashed in-ground pool and doing a complete backflip into the primordial sludge at the bottom. We're talking stagnant water full of everyone's piss from that night, combined with I can only assume was even more piss (and possibly puke) from the whole summer before that.
I fell in on the deep end and scarred up my legs on the cement bottom.
My friends were shouting at me to make my way out, but I was completely lost. I puked and then fell down again. This girl I'd only met a few times before jumped down to the edge of the water and grabbed my hand, then she put my arm around her and led me out of the pool and straight to the bathroom. She closed the door and got me undressed and into the shower. I had some blood on my legs from falling, and she cleaned it out. I was in the shower for a long time. She got me out eventually, got me some food and water, and got me into some clean clothes. It was about 5am when I finally passed out on a couch. When my friend woke me up around 3, I was nested in some blankets with a pillow under my head. My wallet was drying out and my phone was in a bag of rice. And I was pasty white.
She called me up later that night. She got my number from one of my friends and wanted to see if I was okay. I thanked her for helping me out so much, and she said I could repay the favor by taking her out for dinner some day. So I did, and we've been together ever since.
