How Not to Fail At Life - An 8-Step Process

HotShotX

HotShotX

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Warning, the following picture is ridiculously fucking long. Enjoy.

~HotShotX

howtonotfailatlifepn3he9.png
 
Funny yet insightful in some ways.

My biggest disagreement, DO NOT go around spend a ridiculous amount of money on girls....it will only attract the wrong ones.
 
[quote name='JolietJake']Wait, has TMK been reading that?[/quote]

Should be required reading.

For the record, I disagree with a lot of the shit above.

Baby steps, though. Baby steps.
 
[quote name='shigster']I lost interest by step 7, now to get back to living under a rock.[/quote]

Stopped at Step 5

This is CAG, come on now :D
 
[quote name='Weedy649']Funny yet insightful in some ways.

My biggest disagreement, DO NOT go around spend a ridiculous amount of money on girls....it will only attract the wrong ones.[/quote]

Agreed, find a girl that actually works and is willing to split things 50/50 or take turns treating the other out. It's worked for my g/f and I, and we've been together nearly 3 years.

~HotShotX
 
spending hundreds of dollars to get a girl is horrible advice. If you start dating you'll have to spend the rest of your relationship trying to top that first gift. You'll be expected to spend that much or more on all gifts.

You spend $200 on a gift before you're dating you'll be expected to spend even more on her birthday, valentines day, anniversary, and christmas. You'll effectively be shooting yourself in the foot, because each year girls will expect the gifts to be slightly more expensive.

Trying to look like a baller within the first month of a relationship will cause you to be broke within the first year. Thus once you become broke, you'll be called either broke or cheap by your gf to all of her friends for not wanting to spend every penny of income that you make.

Moral of the story is go into a relationship appearing to be broke. If she sticks with you then you know she's not after money, and when you buy gifts you won't always have to be trying to outdo the first gift of $200+ dollars
 
I think it sounds like a gigantic "accept the mediocrity that is your life" message, but I think the ultimate point is that if you suffer enough while striving to think of yourself as [some positive quality], you reforge your identity into something better. So if you deem yourself intelligent and witty, you gradually integrate that into your life.

Otherwise this thing could be cut down into 1/100th as long as it is and get the same message across - seems that the use of Ton o' Words is meant to look for forcefully true.
 
How did you guys get so far? I stopped after step 2...

I thought for sure this thread or the topic was going to be funny too.
 
I was with it till the end and gave up. The first four steps or so I would agree with, after than it just became a mess.
 
Pretty good. The creationists line was the best.[quote name='ducttapeBigSexy']I think step one of "How Not to Fail At Life" should be "Don't model your life after poorly drawn cartoons you read on the Internet" :p[/quote]
XKCD disagrees with you.
 
[quote name='The Crotch']Pretty good. The creationists line was the best.
XKCD disagrees with you.[/quote]


And XKCD is right.
 
[quote name='The Crotch']XKCD disagrees with you.[/QUOTE]

How is modeling yourself after a 10% success rate good?

....

Actually that is probably way higher than average.
 
Wow, I cant believe I got through all of that.

Should have been shorter but decent. I do like the stop being a bitch and get a real job message though.
 
[quote name='HotShotX']Agreed, find a girl that actually works and is willing to split things 50/50 or take turns treating the other out. It's worked for my g/f and I, and we've been together nearly 3 years.

~HotShotX[/QUOTE]

+1, seriously.

Not to mention in times of unemployment, said girlfriend should be willing to give bountiful gifts of games for ones birthday (RE5 CE, Killzone 2, Mad World). Kicks ass.
 
I found the art style of the stick figures the most entertainment of it all.

Get a job though is the really only true step, after that, everything else should fall into place if you're not a retard.
 
I dunno. You have to be selective about the people you hang with. If you join a group of friends who just rag on each other all day, that ain't going to do anything for your self-confidence.
 
Wow, great. Please, everyone who sees this message, I beg you, please repost stupid new$$$ shit from 4chan everywhere you go.

Help contribute to the ruination of not just 4chan itself, but the rest of the goddamn internet along with it. Help bring the whole fuckin thing to it's knees with this crap.

I, for one, did not enjoy.

[quote name='The Crotch']XKCD disagrees with you.[/QUOTE]
And XKCD is one of the worst pieces of shit ever, so...
 
[quote name='Greetard']You can lose all your money chasing women, but you'll never lose women chasing money.[/quote]
Scrooge would disagree.:lol:
 
It was a joke guys. Jeez. I wonder if anything will make any of you crack a smile. If you're actually using the advice, you're a moron to being with but it doesn't mean the thing can be a funny ha ha.
 
[quote name='CoffeeEdge']Wow, great. Please, everyone who sees this message, I beg you, please repost stupid new$$$ shit from 4chan everywhere you go.

Help contribute to the ruination of not just 4chan itself, but the rest of the goddamn internet along with it. Help bring the whole fuckin thing to it's knees with this crap.

I, for one, did not enjoy.


And XKCD is one of the worst pieces of shit ever, so...[/quote]

Actually, I got this from Digg.com, not 4chan.

That's right, I get my retarded information second-handed.

~HotShotX
 
Digg is a glorified information superhighway rest stop. It's one needless extra click to get to your fucking Google search result.
 
But google doesn't give you the glory hole.
[quote name='crunchb3rry']Digg is a glorified information superhighway rest stop. It's one needless extra click to get to your fucking Google search result.[/quote]
 
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