Just had an INTERVIEW and my FLY was DOWN the ENTIRE time!!!

Javery

Javery

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Awesome. I've been getting calls from headhunters about 3 times a day so finally, upon catching me on a particularly shitty day, I gave in and set up an interview. I have no immediate plans to leave my firm but I went just to hear them out and see if there is anything better in NYC (there isn't). Anyway, after leaving the building I looked down and my fly was wide open - not just down - but wide open. My penis was practically out and about and I'm sure they are having a good laugh right now...

It sucks but man is it funny.
 
[quote name='The Successful Dropout']but is your fly down right now?[/QUOTE]

um, no. Although the occasional breeze feels nice, I don't make a habit of it.
 
God. That's some great stuff.

Back in high school, one of my good friends went to the restroom in between classes. Next class comes and he's sitting at his desk and feels a draft. His fly wasn't just down... but his dick was hanging out, implying that he walked to class with his dick out.

Greatest story ever told.
 
Anyone ever have the dilema where your with some people and you notice your fly is down but no one else has noticed? Then you have to decide if you immediately zip, making it obvious and thus recieving ridicule, or do you wait till you get a chance to be less conspicious about it but risk someone catching you with your fly down and thus being subject to the most amount of ridicule?
 
eXamine Your Zipper!

... I'm one of those people that would almost yell "Crap my fly was down" and then ask people if they saw anything.

I like seeing different reactions :)
 
[quote name='chickenhawk']How the hell does all this stuff happen to you? Sometimes I can't help but think you are making half this shit up.[/QUOTE]

I know. It sounds ridiculous even to me but these things ALWAYS seem to happen to me. I have loser's luck I think. If something could go wrong, it will - often with hilarious results.
 
I had a pair of short, and the button fell off. So I just safety-pinned it until my lazy ass remembered to get up and sew a button back on it. Anyway, I guess the safety-pin wasn't in the right spot so it positioned the fabric in such a way that my fly would easily open on its own. I found this out while helping some friends move. They didn't say anything, so I hope they didn't notice. But it happened a couple of times that day and I would stay in the moving truck or act like I was looking at something to fix it.
 
[quote name='b0bx13']I saw the title of this thread on the front page, and I KNEW it was a javeryh story :lol:[/QUOTE]

Qft. Only javeryh. :lol:

[quote name='RedvsBlue']Anyone ever have the dilema where your with some people and you notice your fly is down but no one else has noticed? Then you have to decide if you immediately zip, making it obvious and thus recieving ridicule, or do you wait till you get a chance to be less conspicious about it but risk someone catching you with your fly down and thus being subject to the most amount of ridicule?[/QUOTE]

Our technology teacher is this sort of deranged old guy with odd mannerisms and an even weirder personality. One day, he starts lecturing us on AutoCAD, and one of the class jokesters goes 'Hey, Fialko. XYZ.' He looks down, like, 'what?', but they guys knew what he meant, and it turned out his goddamn fly was fucking ipon, no undertrousers, either. The entire class freaked, it was great. Then he told us some unrelated story.
 
[quote name='Brak']God. That's some great stuff.

Back in high school, one of my good friends went to the restroom in between classes. Next class comes and he's sitting at his desk and feels a draft. His fly wasn't just down... but his dick was hanging out, implying that he walked to class with his dick out.

Greatest story ever told.[/QUOTE]
Makes me wonder if your friend was heckled, applauded, or had women gasping in shock. :rofl:

And javeryh, at least you didn't shit yourself in the interview process. :lol: That might happen on whatever offer you get from them, and I'm sure you'll ask for an office close to the bathroom. ;)
 
[quote name='RedvsBlue']Anyone ever have the dilema where your with some people and you notice your fly is down but no one else has noticed? Then you have to decide if you immediately zip, making it obvious and thus recieving ridicule, or do you wait till you get a chance to be less conspicious about it but risk someone catching you with your fly down and thus being subject to the most amount of ridicule?[/QUOTE]

That's like one of the greatest unsolved mysteries of modern pants-wearing times.
 
Why aren't you guys wearing boxers with buttons on them? That way, if you forget to zip, at least your junk stays behind your boxers!
 
[quote name='Rig']Why aren't you guys wearing boxers with buttons on them? That way, if you forget to zip, at least your junk stays behind your boxers![/QUOTE]

My junk was tucked away nicely thanks to the boxer layer but it just felt like it was ready to pop out because the fly was so wide open - it was like in the diamond configuration when I realized it...
 
[quote name='$hady']I'm calling fake untill we see pics![/QUOTE]
I don't know if that's funny or scary. :shock:

[quote name='Rig']Why aren't you guys wearing boxers with buttons on them? That way, if you forget to zip, at least your junk stays behind your boxers![/QUOTE]
That's one more thing you have to deal with on the mad dash out the door when you're late for work. :D

Less issues to deal with, the better.
 
The buttons are a pain sometimes too. It's like they are buried in layers of material and you have to dig around in there for a while to unbutton them. I generally don't use the door function anyway, so I'd prefer boxers without any flaps what-so-ever. Something just seems wrong about that though.
 
[quote name='b0bx13']I saw the title of this thread on the front page, and I KNEW it was a javeryh story :lol:[/QUOTE]

You and I both :lol:
 
[quote name='shipwreck']The buttons are a pain sometimes too. It's like they are buried in layers of material and you have to dig around in there for a while to unbutton them. I generally don't use the door function anyway, so I'd prefer boxers without any flaps what-so-ever. Something just seems wrong about that though.[/QUOTE]


Just put them on backwards!!
 
[quote name='Tiphireth']Our technology teacher is this sort of deranged old guy with odd mannerisms and an even weirder personality. One day, he starts lecturing us on AutoCAD, and one of the class jokesters goes 'Hey, Fialko. XYZ.' He looks down, like, 'what?', but they guys knew what he meant, and it turned out his goddamn fly was fucking ipon, no undertrousers, either. The entire class freaked, it was great. Then he told us some unrelated story.[/QUOTE]

My cad teacher would have thought you were talking about 3D space. Then he might have flashed his XYZ gang sign. :roll: :lol:
 
Dude, that's pretty funny. One way to show them you've got balls.

I don't have anything like that, but once I was sitting in Starbucks prepping myself for a big interview, and a dude walking by spilled coffee all over me. Did I mention I was wearing my best suit? I was just like, "Are you SERIOUS???"
 
[quote name='sblymnlcrymnl']My cad teacher would have thought you were talking about 3D space. Then he might have flashed his XYZ gang sign. :roll: :lol:[/QUOTE]

The only 3D Design we got into was Co-Create. :lol:
 
Where're all the people who like to bitch about the javeryh minutia threads?

I doubt you'll have to worry about too many headhunters stalking your office from now on.
 
[quote name='Wombat']A bird once crapped on me right before a job interview, needless to say I didnt get that job.[/QUOTE]

One time, on a field trip, this kid from class was sitting on a park bench at the beach. He tilted his head back to rest for a few minutes...

A bird flew by and took a dump directly in his mouth...
 
[quote name='zewone']Here you go led:

Get a goddamn live journal jav!![/QUOTE]

I dunno if the emo crowd would really get jave, and vice-versa.
 
[quote name='Saucy Jack']One time, on a field trip, this kid from class was sitting on a park bench at the beach. He tilted his head back to rest for a few minutes...

A bird flew by and took a dump directly in his mouth...[/QUOTE]
Ugh! I feel like I should wash my mouth out now. Did he say what it tasted like? :D
 
[quote name='RedvsBlue']LOL, why is that I could only see this happening to you.[/QUOTE]So I guess I wasn't the only one who just knew this posted by javeryh after reading the thread title on the front page!
 
[quote name='Saucy Jack']One time, on a field trip, this kid from class was sitting on a park bench at the beach. He tilted his head back to rest for a few minutes...

A bird flew by and took a dump directly in his mouth...[/QUOTE]

 
[quote name='GuyWithGun']Ugh! I feel like I should wash my mouth out now. Did he say what it tasted like? :D[/QUOTE]

He didn't say anything about it. He was too busy crying and they had to send him home.

Also, another time somehow he managed to spill his lunch all over himself and got sent home because he was afraid that he had serious burns. The food wasn't even hot!
 
"Don’t worry, Homer, I have a foolproof strategy to get you out of here. Surprise witnesses, each more surprising than the last. The judge won’t know what hit him."

Now that's one surprise witness.

"Don't touch my stuff."

Now we know why your avatar is what it is.
 
[quote name='CheapyD']So I guess I wasn't the only one who just knew this posted by javeryh after reading the thread title on the front page![/QUOTE]

I can't believe no one else has these things happen to them...
 
[quote name='javeryh']I can't believe no one else has these things happen to them...[/QUOTE]

Oh, they happen to me but I'm usually by myself and no one notices, therefore, since no one knows it happened except me, it never happened!
 
[quote name='Brak']God. That's some great stuff.

Back in high school, one of my good friends went to the restroom in between classes. Next class comes and he's sitting at his desk and feels a draft. His fly wasn't just down... but his dick was hanging out, implying that he walked to class with his dick out.

Greatest story ever told.[/QUOTE]

No, THIS is the greatest story ever told.

In 6th grade, my teacher's fly was unzipped. He was standing in front of the class talking and put his foot up on a chair, at which point his dong flopped out. Needless to say, the classroom erupted into pandemonium. I've never seen anyone's face get so red, although this one girl's face was red as fuck, too. Not bullshitting here, one of the funniest things I've ever seen.
 
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