Marriage and Gaming
- Thread starter dlostluv
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WhiskyBR
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My wife will watch me play while she messes with laptop or sews her needlepoint, unless there is something on TV she wants to watch. She is more interested in watching the creepy games with cool graphics (Dead Space for example) than watching me play COD. She doesn't care about the shooters and I have to put headphones on when playing multiplayer (preferred anyway, but no mic). Also... Netflix is awesome. She can almost always find some stupid horror movie to watch on her laptop.
I only go for a couple hours a night though, if that. Sometimes 15 minutes of pinball fx is enough. Or PvZ.
Regardless she prefers to be in the same room with me even if we both have headphones on than have me hiding in my office playing Civ forever.
I only go for a couple hours a night though, if that. Sometimes 15 minutes of pinball fx is enough. Or PvZ.
Regardless she prefers to be in the same room with me even if we both have headphones on than have me hiding in my office playing Civ forever.
That's crazy! Getting married and then moving in together? I couldn't imagine ever doing this. I have been living with my girlfriend for about a year and a half officially, but stayed with her nightly for the majority of our relationship. I realize it's probably too late now, but living together is definately going to be the tough part. What you think of her now is going to completely change once you see her habits and she sees yours. If you are lying to her about your video game playing time, she is going to be upset once she sees how much you play. Hopefully she already knows going into this, but you're looking at quite some time to get comfortable with each other and get a handle on the homelife (housework and such, sharing the television, etc).
Congratulations, but wow. I just couldn't imagine. I think I'd sooner save myself for marriage than wait to move in together, lol.
The Kinect is a good way to get her interested. My girlfriend and I might as well be married, but she hates gaming. Thinks its stupid and a waste of time. We manage by me playing when she's doing work, at the gym, asleep, etc. I don't mind because she goes to bed early anyway, so it gives me enough time for gaming and time to spend with her. Our only "issues" with it comes when she wants to get some housework done and I am not interested in doing it right then. I don't need hours and hours of gaming a day, and some days go without turning on the Xbox at all. You'll figure it out though.
Congratulations, but wow. I just couldn't imagine. I think I'd sooner save myself for marriage than wait to move in together, lol.
The Kinect is a good way to get her interested. My girlfriend and I might as well be married, but she hates gaming. Thinks its stupid and a waste of time. We manage by me playing when she's doing work, at the gym, asleep, etc. I don't mind because she goes to bed early anyway, so it gives me enough time for gaming and time to spend with her. Our only "issues" with it comes when she wants to get some housework done and I am not interested in doing it right then. I don't need hours and hours of gaming a day, and some days go without turning on the Xbox at all. You'll figure it out though.
My wife does not play games, except for the occasional Press Your Luck or Wheel of Fortune on PSN. She has interests that I do not partake in...Going to be married 12 years.
What I am saying is, it is possible for both of you to have your own interests and get along famously.
What I am saying is, it is possible for both of you to have your own interests and get along famously.
utopianmachine
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My husband and have been together just over a year now. We are both pretty hardcore gamers, and we were that way when single and dating too. Now that we're married and live together, we make time for gaming in the evening after dinner. He'll usually play a PC game or ocassionally the 360. I'll either play the 360, DS, or PC. I maybe get a couple hours of gaming in on a good day, for workdays. He can usually get at least 3.
We both really enjoy gaming and so make time for it. I think that works really well. We like to game in the same room together. If he goes out into the living room and plays 360, I may bring my DS so I can be near him.
On Saturdays and often Sundays, we'll spend all afternoon playing Magic: The Gathering together. (I know, hardcore geek.) He loves the game, and I mostly play to make him happy. Both of us being geeks and gamers has allowed us to spend a lot of time together in similar hobbies. It works for us.
We both really enjoy gaming and so make time for it. I think that works really well. We like to game in the same room together. If he goes out into the living room and plays 360, I may bring my DS so I can be near him.
On Saturdays and often Sundays, we'll spend all afternoon playing Magic: The Gathering together. (I know, hardcore geek.) He loves the game, and I mostly play to make him happy. Both of us being geeks and gamers has allowed us to spend a lot of time together in similar hobbies. It works for us.
[quote name='javeryh']Rodimus - your situation sounds a lot like mine except I have a 6 year old instead of a 6 month old. As she gets older my free time has decreased dramatically and I expect that trend to continue until she is all grown up and out on her own. At 6 months there were naps and playing games while she was on my lap - now I have to fight for the TV! She stays up later and has her own interests and always wants to play with me (not video games). I'd rather have a pretend tea party than play Xbox any day of the week but my free time went from sneaking a few hours in late at night to having to miss out on sleep entirely to play anything nowadays.[/QUOTE]
I have a six year old daughter as well, but she adores video games. I can't tell you how much fun I have playing Monsters Vs. Aliens or Lego Harry Potter with her sitting on my lap. She gets so into it that when we complete a level, she'll get so excited she throws her arms around my neck and give me the biggest hug and kiss. I get teary eyed thinking about it. My 9 year old son is very into them as well, but with him it's the RTS PC games. Occasionally he'll ask if he can play Call of Duty and of course it's not age appropriate, so I tell him no...but it's funny when I look at my gamertag and it says I played Modern Warfare 2, because then I know it's him.
I have a six year old daughter as well, but she adores video games. I can't tell you how much fun I have playing Monsters Vs. Aliens or Lego Harry Potter with her sitting on my lap. She gets so into it that when we complete a level, she'll get so excited she throws her arms around my neck and give me the biggest hug and kiss. I get teary eyed thinking about it. My 9 year old son is very into them as well, but with him it's the RTS PC games. Occasionally he'll ask if he can play Call of Duty and of course it's not age appropriate, so I tell him no...but it's funny when I look at my gamertag and it says I played Modern Warfare 2, because then I know it's him.
elessar123
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[quote name='2DMention']I've heard of a few people whose wife actually made their husband sell their games and wouldn't let them play anything. Ouch.[/QUOTE]
Grounds for a divorce!
Grounds for a divorce!
utopianmachine
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[quote name='2DMention']I've heard of a few people whose wife actually made their husband sell their games and wouldn't let them play anything. Ouch.[/QUOTE]
Marriage is about compromise. It's one thing to ask your spouse to spend less time gaming and more time with the family, and quite another to ask a spouse to give up a hobby altogether.
Marriage is about compromise. It's one thing to ask your spouse to spend less time gaming and more time with the family, and quite another to ask a spouse to give up a hobby altogether.
Yep, that's another big reason to live together first. So you can really know each other's habits, hobbies etc. and see if you're willing to make the needed compromises or not.
A lot of that stuff just doesn't come up until you're actually living together. Spending nights at each other's places all the time etc. isn't just the same as always being together, having to put both your stuff into one place etc.
If people want to get married without living together, more power to them. I don't care what other's do. But I'd never in a million years consider doing it myself.
A lot of that stuff just doesn't come up until you're actually living together. Spending nights at each other's places all the time etc. isn't just the same as always being together, having to put both your stuff into one place etc.
If people want to get married without living together, more power to them. I don't care what other's do. But I'd never in a million years consider doing it myself.
[quote name='dmaul1114']Yep, that's another big reason to live together first. So you can really know each other's habits, hobbies etc. and see if you're willing to make the needed compromises or not.
A lot of that stuff just doesn't come up until you're actually living together. Spending nights at each other's places all the time etc. isn't just the same as always being together, having to put both your stuff into one place etc.
If people want to get married without living together, more power to them. I don't care what other's do. But I'd never in a million years consider doing it myself.[/QUOTE]
Exactly. Living with someone is all about compromise which generally makes both people less happy. I would have never ever ever gotten married without living together first. There are so many things I want to do that I don't out of love for my wife and she can say the same thing. Then just wait until the kids come - talk about compromise - kids don't compromise! They practically run the show!
A lot of that stuff just doesn't come up until you're actually living together. Spending nights at each other's places all the time etc. isn't just the same as always being together, having to put both your stuff into one place etc.
If people want to get married without living together, more power to them. I don't care what other's do. But I'd never in a million years consider doing it myself.[/QUOTE]
Exactly. Living with someone is all about compromise which generally makes both people less happy. I would have never ever ever gotten married without living together first. There are so many things I want to do that I don't out of love for my wife and she can say the same thing. Then just wait until the kids come - talk about compromise - kids don't compromise! They practically run the show!
My wife and I lived together for a few years before getting married. I think that was a smart move. My brother did the opposite moving in together after they got married. I think they lasted 6 or 7 months before splitting up. It would have saved him a lot of time and money if they decided to try living together for a year before making that commitment.
Yep. But I understand people have religious/moral reasons for not living together first, and that's their right. I never try to push people on it.
Just seems like way to big a risk for me to every remotely consider it. You just don't really know someone, or know what level of compromises are required, until you live with someone and spend nearly all your free time around them under the same roof.
Better to find out you're not compatible/willing to make the needed compromises before getting married and having all the legal hassles to deal with IMO. Living together first isn't fool proof by any means, but you probably at least have a lot less relationships ending in a year or less. Most of those that end so quickly are probably due to incompatibilities that could have been realized in the same time frame of co-habitating.
Just seems like way to big a risk for me to every remotely consider it. You just don't really know someone, or know what level of compromises are required, until you live with someone and spend nearly all your free time around them under the same roof.
Better to find out you're not compatible/willing to make the needed compromises before getting married and having all the legal hassles to deal with IMO. Living together first isn't fool proof by any means, but you probably at least have a lot less relationships ending in a year or less. Most of those that end so quickly are probably due to incompatibilities that could have been realized in the same time frame of co-habitating.
BattleChicken
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[quote name='BillyBob29']My gaming habits didn't change at all after getting married. But over the last 7 months since my son was born, I can count the amount of times I've sat down to play games on one hand.[/QUOTE]
The same thing happened to me. I've just shifted to games I can play slowly over time, or games I can play with one hand.
Civ 5 has gotten more play time than anything else since BattleChicken Jr. was born.
The same thing happened to me. I've just shifted to games I can play slowly over time, or games I can play with one hand.
Civ 5 has gotten more play time than anything else since BattleChicken Jr. was born.
Rodimus I respect what you're saying about if she doesn't like them. Make sure she doesn't like them because she thinks they're "Boy's toys" or just "toys" or any of that bullshit.
We have enough of those lies spreading around and they need to be nipped in the bud. We need more girl gamers to increase the dating and attractive pool. It shouldn't be that the Asian girls are the only hot girls playing games. I'm sure all the girl gamers here are fairly attractive but I still have a sneaking suspicion they're like unicorns or the exception to the rule.
Also I'd just like girl gamers because more tend to like RPG's and if I can find more J-RPG fans then thumbs up. There are too many FPS fans(on the 360) and too few people with my taste on XBL.
We have enough of those lies spreading around and they need to be nipped in the bud. We need more girl gamers to increase the dating and attractive pool. It shouldn't be that the Asian girls are the only hot girls playing games. I'm sure all the girl gamers here are fairly attractive but I still have a sneaking suspicion they're like unicorns or the exception to the rule.
Also I'd just like girl gamers because more tend to like RPG's and if I can find more J-RPG fans then thumbs up. There are too many FPS fans(on the 360) and too few people with my taste on XBL.
dlostluv
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[quote name='shieryda']Do yourself a favor and buy a 2nd tv so that you can play your games while she watches her crappy reality shows.[/QUOTE]
I thought about that along time ago actually, preferably just for the sake in case her friends come over i won't hog the main room tv and maybe go play in a computer room or something (i got hdmi and a old set of vga cables for my xbox and turtlebeach head phones). Whats really funny is the fact that i'm alil more focused on getting ready to move and sorta focusing on either finding a better career or at least moving to a different department within the company (i work for a bank as a teller but i want to move to operations). Now i know once i have kids thats gonna be a game changer but its a part of life and i figured i had over 15 years of gaming under my belt (and worked at a gamestop only to leave because customers just annoyed me with some dumb stuff). I really appreciate everyones input- man i love this forum.
I thought about that along time ago actually, preferably just for the sake in case her friends come over i won't hog the main room tv and maybe go play in a computer room or something (i got hdmi and a old set of vga cables for my xbox and turtlebeach head phones). Whats really funny is the fact that i'm alil more focused on getting ready to move and sorta focusing on either finding a better career or at least moving to a different department within the company (i work for a bank as a teller but i want to move to operations). Now i know once i have kids thats gonna be a game changer but its a part of life and i figured i had over 15 years of gaming under my belt (and worked at a gamestop only to leave because customers just annoyed me with some dumb stuff). I really appreciate everyones input- man i love this forum.
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