Meet-the-parent gift?

infamyRISE

infamyRISE

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So next week I'm having dinner with my girlfriend at her mothers' place. This is the first time I will have met her mother, and wanted to bring a small gift as a token of thanks for the food/hospitality. What's the standard fare for this type of thing? I was told she doesn't drink, so my bottle of wine idea is right out. Flowers were suggested, but I would rather go a slightly more creative route.

Anyone have any input?
 
[quote name='infamyRISE']Haha wow....this is about as much help as I would have gotten around, say...4chan.[/quote]
Come on dude, given the information you've laid out for us...

Do you even know some info about her mom? It's pretty hard for us to take a shot in the dark and hit a home run.
 
Sorry cochese, your post was genuinely insightful.

Unfortunately, I DON'T know too much about her, never having met her. From what I'm told she's pretty laid back. I also have my girlfriend on this whole brainstorming idea, though I don't know how serious she's taking it, considering her first reaction was "Oh, you don't have to do that!"


I was just seeing if there was any widely accepted ideas as a proper gift other than the flowers...which I don't mind. I was just exploring my options.
 
Mmmm...ok. Does she live close by to you? Is there maybe something you could pickup nearby that would be hard for her to get locally?

edit: Does she drink coffee or have a predilection for chocolate? If you're going to veer away from flowers my suggestion would be some kind of luxury food item (e.g. not enough for her to make her feel fat (yes i know this is laughable)). Cosmetics or whimsical gifts are really a hit or huge miss situation.

2nd edit: Yeah, you know what. fuck the haters. I say just buy her flowers. I think a nice vase could be a good touch to go with it. Let me know what you decide on.
 
When you're done eating, comment on how delicious it was and how you'll have to come again. Then throw a 20 on the table and walk out the door.
 
How much are you willing to spend? A box of Godiva chocolate is a good idea though they are a pretty expensive brand name.
 
I'd say an unusual dessert, maybe a local specialty. Or if it's just for her, a Yankee Candle (they have GREAT scents). They're the ones in the jar, can get them at Michael's crafts, candle shops, Bed Bath and Beyond.
 
[quote name='infamyRISE']Haha wow....this is about as much help as I would have gotten around, say...4chan.[/quote]

That is correct, but with no pictures of dicks. Score CAG: 1 4chan: 0

Overall I would say get her some flowers or like some speciality chocolate or something. Also you could bring a bottle of fine wine or something for the dinner.
 
Make a dessert or a side. I mean make it too.
Store bought is nice, but homemade means time and thought and it's like sharing a part of yourself with her. A great conversation piece.
 
[quote name='mtxbass1']How old are you OP? I ask because a fine bottle of wine is usually in order if her parents like that sort of thing.[/quote]

[quote name='infamyRISE']I was told she doesn't drink, so my bottle of wine idea is right out.[/quote]

.
 
If its just the mom you are meeting I'm guessing she is single in which case single women love to get flowers (judging from whenever my mom gets flowers).

Flowers will do just fine. A nice bouquet maybe...$15-25.
 
I can't believe I'm the first to suggest this - bring a marble rye. ;)

Seriously, if you're meeting for dinner I endorse the "bring a side / dessert" idea. It could possibly be odd bringing the mother a gift in the first place - it could make her feel uncomfortable. But something like this would be thoughtful while at the same time easier to accept. If that makes any sense. :)
 
[quote name='argyle']I can't believe I'm the first to suggest this - bring a marble rye. ;)

Seriously, if you're meeting for dinner I endorse the "bring a side / dessert" idea. It could possibly be odd bringing the mother a gift in the first place - it could make her feel uncomfortable. But something like this would be thoughtful while at the same time easier to accept. If that makes any sense. :)[/QUOTE]

And if she rejects the gift take it home and eat it.....or take it to work and let your co-workers eat it.
 
Normally, I'd just do the bottle of wine, but since you say she isn't a drinker then a nice bouquet of flowers, or possibly some sort of live flowers, would be good. It's hard to go wrong with flowers.
 
[quote name='argyle']I can't believe I'm the first to suggest this - bring a marble rye. ;)

Seriously, if you're meeting for dinner I endorse the "bring a side / dessert" idea. It could possibly be odd bringing the mother a gift in the first place - it could make her feel uncomfortable. But something like this would be thoughtful while at the same time easier to accept. If that makes any sense. :)[/quote]

How about cinnamon babka? :lol:
 
I'm going to agree with those who said about cooking a side dish, or desert. It's better if you DO cook it :)

But, honestly.. flowers are always nice. You can't go wrong with them.
 
[quote name='browneyedgal68']I'd say an unusual dessert, maybe a local specialty. Or if it's just for her, a Yankee Candle (they have GREAT scents). They're the ones in the jar, can get them at Michael's crafts, candle shops, Bed Bath and Beyond.[/QUOTE]

I think this is a pretty good idea. A candle would probably go over really well.
 
Thanks for the ideas. I have some real decision making to do in the next few days.

One of the things I did that started this relationship was bake cookies for my now-girlfriend when she was sick. I was told her mom dug that a lot.
 
flowers/candy/Ben stiller : 0

Man Cook Food : 1

Cooking for the women never fails, even if you are an extremely horrible cook they will love the gesture anyway...trust me.
 
[quote name='infamyRISE']Thanks for the ideas. I have some real decision making to do in the next few days.

One of the things I did that started this relationship was bake cookies for my now-girlfriend when she was sick. I was told her mom dug that a lot.[/quote]

Sounds like baking something for her is the way to go then.
 
[quote name='infamyRISE']Sorry cochese, your post was genuinely insightful.

Unfortunately, I DON'T know too much about her, never having met her. From what I'm told she's pretty laid back. I also have my girlfriend on this whole brainstorming idea, though I don't know how serious she's taking it, considering her first reaction was "Oh, you don't have to do that!"


I was just seeing if there was any widely accepted ideas as a proper gift other than the flowers...which I don't mind. I was just exploring my options.[/quote]

How about some good chocolates or other candies? Even better, if you know how to bake/cook (not hard at all), bake her some cookies yourself. And you say she's laid back...well if that's the case, bake her some pot or hash brownies. I['m sure that will go over quite well. You might even end up in a threesome with your girlfriend and her mom.
 
This is tough, because this sort of thing is a dying art. If you bring the wrong gift, you are just as likely to give off the wrong impression, and be worse off than getting nothing. I'm guessing you aren't too old and that you really like this girl your dating.

My honest thought here is that you should ask your girlfriend, say that you want to bring something, and let her pick it out. First off, she probably knows the right sort of gift for the occasion, and (bonus) if it goes horribly wrong, you are going to have one person (the most important one) in your corner.

If you don't want to do this, I wouldn't do anything too creative. Flowers are the best (go to the florist, tell them the occasion, and let them pick it out, or go the CAG way, go to Kroger during some off hours, and if they have a florist, they seem to love to help, and it'll be about half the price).

I think creativity has a place, but I'm not so sure the first meeting is the best time. Just show up, dress nice, be polite, and let your real personality show through in subsequent meeetings.
 
Flowers are best. If you try and cook something and it turns out bad, it could be a huge waste of time and leave a bad impression. For a first meeting, something simple is bet. Maybe in the future when you actually get to know her parents, you could do something more extravagant.
 
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