Pick up lines

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Hi CAGs, I am gathering the greatest and most unique pick up lines and I need your help. Please tell me the greatest and most unique pick up lines you have used or heard.
 
Did you fall from heaven? B/c your face is really fucked up.
I lost my virginity, can I have yours?
God must have taken the thunder from the skies and put them in your thighs.
Nice pants, they'd look good on my floor.
 
"I will destroy you." "I have you now." "Tear this ship apart, I want them alive!"

Basically anything by Darth Vader is a guaranteed lay.
 
[quote name='c0rnpwn']"I will destroy you." "I have you now." "Tear this ship apart, I want them alive!"

Basically anything by Darth Vader is a guaranteed lay.[/QUOTE]

Except maybe "I am your father."

I don't think that'll fly.
 
Harry Potter Pickup Lines, copied from Facebook.

Have you heard of Platform 9 and 3/4? Well, I can think of something else with the exact same measurements.
If you were a Dementor, I'd become a criminal just to get your kiss.
My name may not be Luna, but I sure know how to Lovegood!
I know we're not in Professor Flitwick's class, but you still are charming.
My love for you burns like a dying phoenix.
Being without you is like being afflicted with the Cruciatus Curse.
Hagrid's not the only giant on campus, if you know what I mean.
Your name must be Severus Severus, because you're making my prince full blood.
Interested in making some magic together? My wand is at the ready.
I must have had some Felix Felicis, because I think I'm about to get lucky.
Without you I feel like I'm in Azkaban and dementors are sucking away my soul.
I've been whomping my willow thinking about you.
If I were to look into the Mirror of Erised, I'd see the two of us together.
You are like a bottle of Skele-Gro: You're growing me a bone.
You must be magical, because I've fallen under your spell.
I'm not wearing an invisibility cloak, but do you think I could still visit your restricted section tonight?
I'd like to get my basilisk into your chamber of secrets.
You don't even have to say "Luminos Maxima" to turn me on!
Have you been using the Petrificus Totalus spell? Because you've made me stiff.
Whaddya say you and me go look for the Room of Requirement?
Do you want to head to the Shrieking Shack? We could do some shrieking of our own.
Are you using the Confundus charm or are you just naturally mind blowing?
Is that a wand in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?
 
[quote name='keithp']Don't forget the classic but simple, "Wanna fuck?"[/QUOTE]

Ah, but you're forgetting the set up. "Nice shoes. Wanna fuck?"

And then there are the classics:

"Do you wash your clothes in Windex? Cause I can see myself in your pants."

Not to be outdone by the immortal...

"If I said you have a nice body, would you hold it against me?"

Not that I'm not enjoying this topic, but seriously...did you really need to ask CAGs for help? This has gotta be one of the most overpopulated website ideas out there. Google is your friend.
 
"You are so selfish. You'll have that body for thr rest of your life, but you won't let me have it for 1 night."
 
[quote name='LaraCroftsLeftBoob']"does this rag smell like chloroform to you?"[/QUOTE]

Or the superior variant:

"Does this chloroform smell like rag to you?"
 
I don't know any pick up lines but I do have tips on getting girls:

Wash your ass every day
Wash your whole body every day
And brush your breath at least 2 or 3 times a day
With your teef and then you know, wash the face

Carry some of your herbal or salt or pepper around in your pocket
Stuff, it opens up in your pocket and gets mixed up with your lint cotton
Or mess with the flavour 'cause when you take the herb and put it in your mouth
Then you gonna be eatin' somethin' then you got little strings of lint pullin' on your teeth
So you just take it out and use the string for flossin'

Well, you need different pairs of socks
You know, some times you need the coloured socks
That's if you're gonna wear one pair of socks to hide your dirt
Then every, every, every other couple of days I mean, you wear the white sock
You can wear them probably 1 or 2 days
Until you try to walk aroun' an' they get caught in the carpet
Then the dirt used up from the carpet gets up into your sock
Then you get the little black spots on the side
Or you can go and you get, you know, the different types
There's other types of socks that's made for shoes
But then they get funky and your feet start sweatin' and stuff
Or you can get sweat socks that grab the sweat so they won't be funk
And you get the powder into put it in so you won't get the funk or the funky feet
Or that little feet and the stink is you have to be the funk
Cuz when you die you go back to the funk
And if you got sock funk you got to be funky cuz it stinkin
Or something ran up in your ass and just died
 
While at a house party, go into the owner's bathroom, shut the door, apply a generous amount of shaving cream/gel to your buttocks and then come back out wearing only socks and holding a razor. Approach the first cute female you see and yell "Can you help a brutha out?!"
 
[quote name='n8rockerasu']you're forgetting the set up. "Nice shoes. Wanna fuck?"
[/QUOTE]

Ah, so THAT'S why it never worked when I tried it...
 
Oh, wow. We really took a left turn with some of these lines.

"I wanna say something. I'm gonna put it out there; if you like it, you can take it, if you don't, send it right back. I want to be on you."

"I don't know how to put this, but I'm kind of a big deal."
 
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[quote name='PR Mega X']"Suck me, beautiful."[/QUOTE]
and if she scoffs just say "Well, this dick isn't going to suck itself!"

Also, "I find the most erotic part of the woman is the boobies."
 
"That must be Jelly, cause Jam sure don't shake like that!"

"If I told you you have a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?"

and how I hooked Mrs. Number83;

"If I tried on your glasses, can I see you home?"
 
Don't say anything at all. Nothing. Then, when the tension becomes too much to bear, you finally, finally, you just say: "How 'bout it, then?"
 
"There's alot about my face you don't know, maybe you and it could get better acquainted some time"

"Hey sexy mama, wanna kill all humans?"

"Well, hello! I usually don't say this but you are the most beautiful trio of gigantic women I've ever laid eyes upon."

"Hey sexy mama. Let's get busy and freaky in that order"
 
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