Cole - Sheamus takes on the HUGE THE GREAT KHALI!
Booker - Sheamus gotta chop down this big oak tree.
Cole - Not sure if they have many oak trees in Punjab - maybe bamboo stalks.
Booker - DAT BIG MEATHOOK JUST TOOK SHEAMUS OUTTA THE GAME!
Booker - THEY ALWAYS TALKING IN PUNJABI! I NEED TA HEAR IT IN ENGLISH DAWG!
Cole - THEY DID! RANJIN SAID WHAT HAPPENED IN ENGLISH! DO YOU NOT LEISTEN TO ANYTHING!?
Josh - Follow the divas on twitter. Follow Nattie and you’ll find out about her love for cats.
Josh - AJ calls herself SD’s Friendly Geek Goddess!
Cole - WHAT!?
Josh - Her favorite movie is Captain America.
Booker - I JUST SAW THAT! IT’S OFF THE CHAIN!
Josh - Booker, who was your idol?
Booker - Cowboy Scott Casey.
Cole - I THINK I SAW HIM IN HIS ‘60S!
Booker - Well, he was up there…back in World Class, the WWWF.
Cole - HOW MANY Ws are you gonna say!?
Booker - He was a hell of a guy. Still is. Good trainer too. I became a 10 time tag champ!
Booker - I look at Natalya and all I can say is SHUCKY DUCKY QUACK QUACK!
Nattie - Beth, I’m with you SISTER. The days of the cute, perky princesses are OVER!
Booker - THE VENOM OF ORTON IS POTENT!
Cole - Mr. Barrett, I think the LeBell Lock should be banned!
Barrett - Well, I have been dealing with some shoulder pain…
Cole - HERE’S MR. SNOOZEFEST! THE MAN WHO PUTS THE WORD BORE IN BORING!
Booker - MY BOY GOT SOME NEW MUSIC!
Cole - IT’S ABOUT AS BORING AS HIS LAST SONG!
Barrett - It makes me sick to my back teeth that he’s Mr. MITB.
Cole - ME TOO!
Booker - YOU HAD YOUR CHANCE!
Barrett - I find it thoroughly disgusting that he’s going to WM 28. If he wants to go there, he should buy a ticket.
Booker - The check I made in the main event of WM, I coulda retired.
Cole - The fact that Daniel Bryan is gonna be in the main event is a joke!
Barrett - THERE ISN’T A PERSON IN THE WWE UNIVERSE WHO CAN ARGUE THAT HE SHOULD BE IN THE WM MAIN EVENT INSTEAD OF ME!
Booker - THAT CHECK, THE DIGITS DAWG, I COULDA RETIRED!
Barrett - I wish you’d stop talking about it.
Josh - Kidd is overpowering Daniel Bryan AND THE WWE LIVE TOUR IS POWERED BY K-MART!
Josh - We were just having a conversation about how honorable Daniel Bryan is. Both Wade and Booker said that he would cash it in before WM.
Cole - TELL US HOW DANIEL BRYAN HELPED START NEXUS!
Barrett - DANIEL BRYAN WAS THE FIRST MAN IN NEXUS TO STAB ME IN THE BACK! I HAVEN’T FORGOTTEN ABOUT IT!
Booker - Seems like you’re still ticked about it.
Barrett - OF COURSE I AM. WOULDN’T YOU BE, INSTEAD OF TALKING ABOUT YOUR CHECK!?
Josh - Cole, for a year, you’ve insulted him, called him a nerd…
Cole - BECAUSE HE IS A NERD!
Josh - And he’s competing at WM for the World title!
Booker - Tyson Kidd’s got some big shoes to fill being one of the Harts and beating THE SUPAHERO DANIEL BRYAN!
Cole - SUPERNERD!
Booker - D-BRYAN IS LOCKED UP AND LOCKED UP TIGHT!
Barrett - I’m seeing holes in his games, AND I’M NOT GONNA TELL YOU WHAT THEY ARE, BUT I SEE THEM!
Booker - I don’t see many flaws in the game.
Barrett - Well he’s on his back right now!
Booker - HE’S IN THE ANACONDA!
Cole - WOO WOO WOO, BOO BOO BOO!
Cole - OH MY LORD!
Josh - What’s your problem with him?
Cole - HE’S A MORON!
ZR - Broskis and Broskettes - WELCOME TO ZACK TOWN! Last week, the ratings went through the roof and it’s because HHH made me the assistant GM of the show. WOO WOO WOO, YOU KNOW IT. It’s my first-ever state of the Showski address. (Zeke comes out)
Zeke - Zack, I know what you’re thinking - that I’m out here to rip your head off your shoulders. You put me in handicap match last week against Cody and Ted. But I’m not. I’m out here to discuss why did you put me in that match?
ZR - We talked about it - if you’re not cool with losing…
Zeke - We talked about you using your limited power to NOT make it a handicap match…
Cole - FINALLY, SOMEONE WHO CAN SPEAK! CODY AND TED!
Cody - Mr. Jackson, I believe the term is sour grapes. As a champion,t hat conduct is as unbecoming as SOME OF THE FACES I’M WITNESSING RIGHT NOW. But then again, you don’t really deserve to be a champion, do you? Ezekiel, when you lose that title, it also loses. You’re making it look bad. So the simplest of solutions - I defeat you and then something happens that hasn’t happens in some time - I resurrect its image just as I have resurrected the career of my friend, Ted DiBiase. Because when…
Zeke - YOU HAVEN’T RESURRECTED ANYTHING. All you’re doing is using Teddy. Teddy, I know what used looks like, you’re being used. In the Corre, I was only serving Wade’s ego until I shoved that ego down his throat. Honestly Ted, there’s nothing greater than freedom!
Cody - TED WANTS TO ASSOCIATE HIMSELF WITH ME BECAUSE HE WANTS A FUTURE. IT SADDENS ME THAT YOU’RE TURNING THE IC TITLE INTO A SHRINE TO MEDIOCRITY. Ted, you can beat the champ. It’s up to you and our esteemed assistant GM.
ZR - Let’s do it! (Teddy comes out)
Teddy - Broski! I don’t care what sounds good to you - it’s like I’ve told you time after time. You are NOT the assistant GM. YOU ARE MY ASSISTANT! And tonight, instead of making a match, you’ll be in one! AGAINST THE INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION, EZEKIEL JACKSON! Ted and Cody, you’re banned from ringside. WOO WOO WOO, YOU KNOW IT!
Cole - What’s his show?
Josh - Z-Long Island Story.
Cole - The fact that Joey Styles and Scott Stanford appear on it says it all.
Josh - Zack calls that the Broski boot!
Booker - I thought it was the Woo Woo Woo?
Josh - He does the fist pump, then says Woo Woo Woo, THEN he does the Broski boot.
Cole - What does Woo Woo Woo mean?
Booker - It’s like HEY HEY HEY, Ya know, like What’s Happening back in the day.
Booker - Zeke reminds me of the ‘80s.
Cole - ANOTHER GREAT DATED REFERENCE!
Booker - I’m just sayin…
Josh - Zack called this show ZACKDOWN!
Josh - Kozlov is a Sambo master!
Booker - Mark Henry imposed his will on BIG VLAD!
Booker - Mark Henry just stifled him.
Sign - 420 lb bag of crap.
Booker - GOTTA GIVE IT TO SHEAMUS MANNING UP!
Sheamus - Henry, what kinda beast are ya? YOU TAKE PLEASURE IN ENDING A MAN’S LIVELYHOOD AND HIS WILL TO COMPETE IN THE WWE. HE DID THAT TO THE BIG SHOW, KANE, AND NOW KOZLOV. HENRY, YA BETTER THINK AGAIN CUZ IT’S NOT GONNA HAPPEN TO ME. NOBODY CAN TAKE AWAY MY WILL OR MY PASSION TO COMPETE IN WWE. THERE’S A LOT OF REASONS WHY, BUT THE BIGGEST ONE IS BECAUSE I’M IRISH. I HAVE THE LUCK FO THE IRISH. I WAS BORN WITH A 24 KT HORSESHOE IN MY ARSE! IF I NEED TO, I CAN PULL IT OUT AND MAKE HIM SWIM WITH SHAMOO AND ALL HIS FRIENDS!
Josh - Trent Barreta was a lifelong member of the WWE Universe.
Booker - Otunga’s got it made. He’s got a beautiful woman and he’s one-half of the tag champs.
Cole - JOSH JUST SHOWED ME THAT YOU SENT OUT A TWEET THAT SAID I’M A TOOL. THE SAME THING HAPPENED ON RAW. DOES ANYONE HAVE THE GUTS TO SAY SOMETHING TO MY FACE!
Booker - I’LL SAY IT - YOU’RE A TOOL. YOU’RE HERE TO MAKE ME LOOK GOOD - THAT’S IT.
Josh - The Usos like to throw sticks of fire to each other to prepare for competition.
Cole - That’s smart…
Cole - Trent’s from Long Island right? So why doesn’t he act like a goof like Ryder?
Josh - They live on different sides of the island.
Booker - ME AND MY BROTHER USED TO DO A MOVE JUST LIKE THAT!
Cole - Here we go…
Curtis - You’ve seen me play on words, but the time for the playing to end…BECAUSE THE WRITING IS ON THE WALL! (Crickets chirp)
Cole - IT’LL BE PUNK-CENA FOR THE UNDISPUTED WWE CHAMPIONSHIP!
Truth - Don’t let the little Jimmies fool ya, Christian. I’M A GOOOOD R-TURTH. JUST LIKE MISTA H HURT YA LAST WEEK, I’M GONNA PUT A HURTIN ON ORTON FOR WHAT HE DID LAST WEEK. ORTON’S GONNA GET GOT, AND THAT’S THE TRUTH!
Christian - Who the hell is little Jimmy?
Booker - I’VE NEVER SEEN A MAN WIN THE WORLD TITLE VIA DQ!
Josh - HE’S THE ONLY MAN TO EVER WIN A WORLD TITLE VIA DQ!
Booker - THAT WAS AS QUICK AS MICHAEL COLE PASSIN A CHIP! THAT’S HOW QUICK THAT WAS!
Truth - HOW ‘YA LIKE THAT LITTLE JIMMIES!?
Booker - ORTON’S GOING TO THAT SPECIAL PLACE!
Booker - SIDEWALK SLAM BY CHRISTIAN!
Cole - Actually, it was a spinebuster.
Booker - Whatever, same thing.