The Gobbledy G00ker Wrestling Thread

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Cesaro and Ambrose are the only two reasons I'm paying attention to this shit at this point, although it looks like the Usos may be transforming into Fat Samoan Tag Team so they may be added to the list soon. Love me some Fat Samoan Tag Teams.

Not a Kofi fan really, but he's had some pretty fun matches with a variety of people in the last couple of months.

Current guys that literally make me stop watching the show: Sheamus, Ryback, Primo/Epico, anything midget related, & Ziggler promos.
 
I didn't get Cesaro at first, but I really dig his style and poise.

I don't get why he's a heel (okay, okay, "HE'S NOT AMERICAN" is a tried and true formula for heels for over a century, but keep that in mind the next time WWE trots out some "shades of grey" character tropes).
 
AC got some modest applause when he beat Kofi on Raw yesterday. The only reasons to hate him are he's non-American (how you doin', Sheamus? Santino?) and a polyglot. He produces some good wrestling so it's kinda hard to boo that. In the meantime, I will enjoy the ride because the E has a tendency to destroy things I like about their product.
 
Well, his in-ring work doesn't convey him as a heel, that's what's confusing about it to me. He doesn't cheat, and he wins matches cleanly (and his power offense is incredibly enjoyable to watch, something he did not appear to have had in ROH).

Kinda funny that he's really come into his own - shows WWE does things right sometimes. Think of all the wailing and gnashing of teeth when they "broke up" the Kings of Wrestling. Half that equation turned out to be good, and the guy's name isn't half bad.

Kassius Ohno, on the other hand...jury's still out on that one. I'll grant that "Chris Hero" sounds generic and indie as all get-out, but Kassius Ohno reinforces the "WWE Dartboard™" theory of naming conventions.
 
[quote name='mykevermin']Kassius Ohno, on the other hand...jury's still out on that one. I'll grant that "Chris Hero" sounds generic and indie as all get-out, but Kassius Ohno reinforces the "WWE Dartboard™" theory of naming conventions.[/QUOTE]

I believe I read somewhere (in response to people bitching about it) that he said he got to pick his own name and chose Kassius Ohno all on his own.

I'm too lazy to look up a resource, and that's purely from the memory bank.... so it could be wrong. ;)
 
I'm pretty confident I recall hearing that as well and I would love to see what Hero's shortlist of names looked like if Ohno was the name he selected.
 
Wow. Man, I suddenly can't remember what Steve Austin's name suggestions were prior to "Stone Cold." There was something along the lines of "Tasty McFreeze," but I can't recall now.
 
This is the meaning someone posted back in May on another forum:

Meaning - Kassius = Cassius, which is the name Muhammad Ali was born with. Ohno is a play on Sonny Onoo. K.O are the initials for the Young Knockout Kid and is what he's known for doing.
 
[quote name='mykevermin']Wow. Man, I suddenly can't remember what Steve Austin's name suggestions were prior to "Stone Cold." There was something along the lines of "Tasty McFreeze," but I can't recall now.[/QUOTE]

He talks about it on one of his documentaries, but I can't remember them now either.

I shudder to think if he had stuck with "The Ringmaster."
 
does anyone really expect cena to win... if cena wins wouldnt he be forced to move to smackdown mostly leaving no major A players on monday
 
[quote name='slidecage']does anyone really expect cena to win... if cena wins wouldnt he be forced to move to smackdown mostly leaving no major A players on monday[/QUOTE]

The roster split hasn't been in effect for a long time now. Ziggler's primarily on RAW, yet he's holding the World Heavyweight Championship MITB.
 
I have to give major kudos to Cesaro and Kofi for not botching that spot. I've seen better wrestlers unable to pull off simpler moves.

This is gonna sound dumb but the major reason I'm no longer interested in WWE is that it seems too real to me, with not enough reality. It's almost the opposite of "it's still real to me!"

The recurring storyline is that Undertaker is anything but an omnipotent zombie, but they still insist on the carny aspects of his character. Triple H really *was* with Stephanie the whole time. No matter how hated or liked he is, Cena will always be the main face on the card. The Rock is better than wrestling and even WWE seems to agree. No matter how awful and immobile he gets, Rey Mysterio is still one of the best high flyers in the world. I feel like all of this would be hard to swallow even if I was a kid.
 
[quote name='davo1224']
This is gonna sound dumb but the major reason I'm no longer interested in WWE is that it seems too real to me, with not enough reality. It's almost the opposite of "it's still real to me!"

The recurring storyline is that Undertaker is anything but an omnipotent zombie, but they still insist on the carny aspects of his character. Triple H really *was* with Stephanie the whole time. No matter how hated or liked he is, Cena will always be the main face on the card. The Rock is better than wrestling and even WWE seems to agree. No matter how awful and immobile he gets, Rey Mysterio is still one of the best high flyers in the world. I feel like all of this would be hard to swallow even if I was a kid.[/QUOTE]

I think you've just got to take it at face value. Of course it's fake, of course it's got some really stupid scripted parts, but it's also pretty entertaining (depending on who you ask). I followed the Attitude era tremendously back in the day, but I think right now they have a lot of good potential on the roster. They still do some really stupid shit (AJ/Vikki/Khali), but then you have moments where Cesaro, Kofi, Bryan, etc are pretty entertaining as well.
 
The problem with today's WWE is that today's WWE is Joel Schumacher while the world is Christopher Nolan.

This is one reason why I say that the wrong wrasslin promotion won. WWE has never been great with original ideas. D-Generation X is a copy of the New World Order. The Attitude era, which everyone seems to love, is a copy of ECW. When WWE has to come up with their own ideas, they always fall flat. At this point, I'm blaming Vince, since he seems to have the last say.

ROH is pretty decent at "Nolan-izing" wrasslin. Shit, even TNA is doing a fine job trying their hand at creating a "Nolan-esque" wrasslin environment. WWE just doesn't get it, and those in power don't care because what they do still sells.
 
Can you elaborate on the Nolan-v-Schumacher issue you're getting at? I've seen a number of Nolan's films, but not Schumacher to my knowledge.
 
[quote name='mykevermin']Can you elaborate on the Nolan-v-Schumacher issue you're getting at? I've seen a number of Nolan's films, but not Schumacher to my knowledge.[/QUOTE]

Schumacher:

The Incredible Shrinking Woman (1981)
D.C. Cab (a.k.a. Street Fleet) (1983) (also Writer)
St. Elmo's Fire (1985)
The Lost Boys (1987)
Cousins (1989)
Flatliners (1990)
Dying Young (1991)
Falling Down (1993)
The Client (1994)
Batman Forever (1995)
A Time to Kill (1996)
Batman & Robin (1997)
8mm (1999) (also Producer)
Flawless (1999) (also Producer and Writer)
Tigerland (2000)
Bad Company (2002)
Phone Booth (2003)
Veronica Guerin (2003)
The Phantom of the Opera (2004) (also Writer)
The Number 23 (2007)
Blood Creek (2009)
Twelve (2010)
Trespass (2011)

There are a few gems there but it's mostly eyeball-rolling garbage.
 
[quote name='mykevermin']Can you elaborate on the Nolan-v-Schumacher issue you're getting at? I've seen a number of Nolan's films, but not Schumacher to my knowledge.[/QUOTE]


Sorry, I should have been better with my description.

It's more in regards to their respective Batman films. Schumacher made campy, brainless Batman films, while Nolan's Batman films feel realistic and are much more thoughtful.
 
Ahhhh. Cross my heart and hope to die, I never saw any of the Batman movies released between Tim Burton and Christopher Nolan.

I did see DC Cab and The Lost Boys, though.
 
There are at least 6 great movies on that list. I wouldn't say it's mostly garbage - though there are some real stinkers.
 
I'd hardly call the Nolan Batman films "realistic and thoughtful." They're still goofy comic book movies, just significantly higher quality ones.

No one post the Tony Atlas video. I saw the freeze frame on the video embed and that was more than enough. If you don't know what I' referring to, don't research it.

[quote name='mitch079']This is the meaning someone posted back in May on another forum:

Meaning - Kassius = Cassius, which is the name Muhammad Ali was born with. Ohno is a play on Sonny Onoo. K.O are the initials for the Young Knockout Kid and is what he's known for doing.[/QUOTE]

I said this when he was first given that name, but I'd wager it has nothing to do with Sonny Onoo. Hero was known for knocking people out, so the "Kassius" was an obvious nod to Ali, while the "Ohno" is from someone thinking Apollo Creed (who was based on Ali} and then Olympian Apolo Ohno, who was still kinda sorta a name people recognized when Hero got his name assignment.
 
I hope the Shield interferes in the Cena-Ziggler match to prevent the injustice of Ziggler losing the briefcase to a guy who already blew his shot.
 
Yeah, Schumacher is a real hit-or-miss director. Also, to be perfectly honest I genuinely liked Batman Forever. I like how it actually delved into the psychological aspects of of the Batman persona. Of course you have to put up with Jim Carrey mugging at the camera for 100 minutes, but you take the good with the bad.
 
I think you guys have completely missed the problem with the company. It's nothing to do with trying to draw comparisons to Christopher Nolan. That's just a waste of time.

The company actually needs to go back to its carny roots and think about what draws people to the company in the first place and what makes things entertaining. And no it isn't Hornswoggle.

There is legitimately nothing interesting going on in the company right now. Zack Ryder could have been huge for the company if they went out of their way to hide his weaknesses and emphasize his strengths and give the guy something to do. Brodus Clay could also have been huge and entertaining if they actually did something with his character beyond dancing to the ring. You had Daniel Bryan who had become the most legit-over guy after Wrestlemania and WWE threw all that heat away. For what? For what?

The company has blown A TON of opportunities. Way too many to count really. And it's been primarily because guys they didn't think could get over, were getting over. And instead of taking the ball and backing those guys, they Matt Hardy'd them all.

Guys like Steve Austin, The Rock, and Foley got over and drew money because the company backed them up when the time came. The only two people you can say that about in the company right now are Ryback and CM Punk. And now to a lesser degree, Cesaro. Fire Miz, Repackage Del Rio, Push Kingston, Push Bryan, Push Ambrose, Repackage Primo, Push Santino (in an underdog Foley/Mikey Whipwreck style world champion run and make it legit - remember the rumble when everyone went crazy), and Push Ryder.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lpoN6PkylyY

Fixed - sorry Genocidal!
 
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[quote name='mitch079']Anyone ever play any of the versions of Total Extreme Wrestling? There's a free beta out here for TEW 2013 - http://www.greydogsoftware.com/forum/showthread.php?t=522222

Just wondering how the game plays. It sounds like it's a promoter simulator, which could be interesting.[/QUOTE]

I've never played that, but I saw something on the WWE 13 board on GameFAQs about a game for iOS. Apparently, wrestlers die and kill each other behind the scenes and JR died of a heroin overdose on someone's game. It sounded pretty outlandish.

edit - Here it is. http://www.gamefaqs.com/boards/672340-wwe-13/64879882
 
[quote name='mykevermin']Sounds pretty straight-up tasteless.[/QUOTE]

That is pretty disgusting. Its a shame because the game doesnt look half bad, 100 times better than Pro Wrestling X garbage at least. I wont bother with it because of that nonsense though.
 
I've said this before, but it sums it up nicely:

WWE is the Walmart of professional wrestling.
 
[quote name='mykevermin']my favorite quote of the article: "I have started joking that somebody should start using a cross knee lock as a finishing move and call it 'A Visit to Dr. James Andrews.'"[/QUOTE]

I always hoped somebody would do a neckbreaker to Kurt Angle during the latter portion of his WWE tenure and dub it "Paging Dr. Jho".
 
[quote name='pitfallharry219']I've never played that, but I saw something on the WWE 13 board on GameFAQs about a game for iOS. Apparently, wrestlers die and kill each other behind the scenes and JR died of a heroin overdose on someone's game. It sounded pretty outlandish.

edit - Here it is. http://www.gamefaqs.com/boards/672340-wwe-13/64879882[/QUOTE]


Maybe it's because I've been near death quite a bit in my life, but the premise of this game sounds interesting. I'm all for a rogue-like wrasslin game where you take a wrassler through a 20-year career and have to watch him end up hobbling around due to injuries. Maybe he goes Benoit. Maybe he goes Pillman. I think the narrative could be interesting. Sorta like how The Wrestler with Mickey Rourke caught the attention of everyone, something like this could too if done right. *shrug*

[quote name='Brak']I've said this before, but it sums it up nicely:

WWE is the Walmart of professional wrestling.[/QUOTE]


While I absolutely agree, I think the most popular of anything is tripe that appeals to the lowest common denominator. Take a look at all CBS programming. Just utter garbage—yet it gets more views than, say, House of Lies or Breaking Bad. And since we're on CheapAssGamer, take a look at video games. Call of Duty and Halo break records while stuff like Telltale's Walking Dead and XCOM make a fraction of those sales. We live in a world where mediocre is the LCD.
 
[quote name='mykevermin']Dr. Thunder vs. Faded Glory in the ELIMINATION CHAMBER.[/QUOTE]
By night he's a lowly employee*, but when the lights are on, and the bell rings, Dr. Thunder brings the noise.

*tee hee....;)
 
[quote name='Chase']While I absolutely agree, I think the most popular of anything is tripe that appeals to the lowest common denominator. Take a look at all CBS programming. Just utter garbage—yet it gets more views than, say, House of Lies or Breaking Bad. And since we're on CheapAssGamer, take a look at video games. Call of Duty and Halo break records while stuff like Telltale's Walking Dead and XCOM make a fraction of those sales. We live in a world where mediocre is the LCD.[/QUOTE]

That's because it is easy to market to and profitable. WWE has always been one big marketing machine.
 
[quote name='Chase']Maybe it's because I've been near death quite a bit in my life, but the premise of this game sounds interesting. I'm all for a rogue-like wrasslin game where you take a wrassler through a 20-year career and have to watch him end up hobbling around due to injuries. Maybe he goes Benoit. Maybe he goes Pillman. I think the narrative could be interesting. Sorta like how The Wrestler with Mickey Rourke caught the attention of everyone, something like this could too if done right. *shrug*[/quote]

Yeah, but.

JR OVERDOSES ON HEROIN.

That's just mad libs right there.
 
Daily News:

Cena Done as Top Face?

- John Cena continues to work pretty banged up. There is more and more talk that Cena's time as the full-time top star isn't going to last forever. There's a feeling that he will do main event storylines for as long as his body holds up and then probably work a schedule where he wouldn't always be on top but be saved for a few big matches and then eventually begin a part-time role.

The time frame of all this obviously depends on his body more than anything else but it's now being said that there is probably at least one more face of WWE that will be chosen by Vince McMahon before Vince hands over all power to Triple H and Stephanie McMahon.

- Right now, Dean Ambrose is the guy WWE officials want to build into a headliner once the angle with The Shield has run its course. At the same time, there are some in the company who think Roman Reigns has the most potential of the three. There's also a feeling that Reigns isn't ready as far as in-ring skills go but Ambrose and Seth Rollins are.

Heel Face Turn?

- There has been at least some talk of turning Alberto Del Rio babyface. WWE officials badly want a top Hispanic babyface. The feeling is that Rey Mysterio won't be around forever and is far from an office favorite while Sin Cara just isn't ready.

Rock To Win Belt?

- As noted, The Rock is being advertised for WWE's Elimination Chamber pay-per-view in February. Word going around WWE is that he will indeed be wrestling on that show, most likely in one of the Chamber matches. This would be The Rock's first-ever Chamber match.

Wrestler Done With WWE?


It has been reported that there are at least a few WWE stars who are thinking about leaving WWE in the near future. One of the names has been revealed to be former WWE Tag Team Champion and third-generation wrestler, Ted DiBiase Jr.

DiBiase has reportedly sent out feelers into the acting business, but he is said to be not very inetrested in moving to California. As readers may recall, DiBiase does have acting experience through WWE Studios' film The Marine 2.

It should be noted that Ted DiBiase's career in WWE has been somewhat of an odyssey considering that WWE officials originally had very high hopes for him when he debuted in 2008. He was a member of The Legacy along with Randy Orton and Cody Rhodes, and it was always well-documented that WWE officials wanted DiBiase to become the next John Cena/Randy Orton type. There were even rumors a few years back that if a young star was to ever end The Undertaker's WrestleMania Streak, WWE officials were giving some thought to having it be DiBiase.

After the dissolution of The Legacy, DiBiase was on Raw for a while with Maryse Ouellet as his valet, but it didn't seem to do much for Ted's career. He was then sent to SmackDown in 2011 and briefly reunited with Cody Rhodes, basically as Rhodes' henchman while Rhodes went on to capture his first Intercontinental Championship. After Cody captured the I.C. Title, WWE officials gave Ted a small push as a babyface star, picking up a few victories on SmackDown and on Superstars or NXT on WWE.com.
 
I know it isn't going to be him, but some of these 1.3.13 promos really remind me of some of the crazy shit that Ultimate Warrior used to ramble on and say in his wacko promos. Tonight's lines were a good example: He will descend upon them, and then something about a plague. Just really random crazy shit.
 
1) WWE has been already active in slowly turning Del Rio face, so that isn't news.

2) I wouldn't call "The Marine 2" acting experience. Perhaps that's just me.
 
I still don't get get Alberto's name. I mean in spanish it sounds cool, but he's basically Alberto the River in english, that just sounds silly. Granted, I wouldn't bet on many fans realizing that.

edit- Yes I realize it's a real surname.
 
WCW-Monday-Nitro-Vol-2-Cover.jpg

Pretty solid DVD cover. Better than the awful, awful, awful Sgt. Pepper inspired WWF Attitude Era cover.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=hlrTxtdtOlI

Big Show is a smart dude, makes a lot of sense.
 
[quote name='mykevermin']
WCW-Monday-Nitro-Vol-2-Cover.jpg

Pretty solid DVD cover. Better than the awful, awful, awful Sgt. Pepper inspired WWF Attitude Era cover.[/QUOTE]

Very reminiscent of the classic Royal Rumble "angry mob" posters.
 
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