Transformers Sucked!

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cfootball1

cfootball1

CAGiversary!
My expectations were low after the pitta full release of the first. I usually am not one to bash on films but this was just horrible.


And Now, Roger Ebert:
"Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen" is a horrible experience of unbearable length, briefly punctuated by three or four amusing moments.
Click to expand...

The movie king says it best!
 
[quote name='becuzimbrown']Transformers did suck.

But, Roger Ebert's still a bitch.[/QUOTE]
How dare you!
 
[quote name='becuzimbrown']You're a bitch too.[/QUOTE]

Allentown, Damn! You live a mere minutes from me......
 
Pannslyvania? You are fired from my state!

Whilst I'm here; I'd rather dig up Gene Siskel's rotten corpse and watch it decay in a lawn chair then endure another Ebert review...
 
[quote name='becuzimbrown']You're a bitch too.[/QUOTE]

The truth is: Anyone who watches Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen is Michael Bay's bitch.

When you pay $8, $9, $10 or whatever it is you spend...you invite Michael Bay into your life. Sure he may go up to you and claim that he can introduce you to Megan Fox. Naively you decide to follow him into the local seedy cockroach-invested motel. The next thing you know, you find yourself with your face in the toilet with the wretched smell of dried fecal matter permeating the air.

Michael Bay rips your pants down and tears your underwear. You scream "Michael Bay ...Stop it...I just want to see the robots" but it's to no avail. Michael Bay's hot breath is hissing in your ear. You hear the splash of toilet water in front of you and the release of Michael Bay's undergarments from his skin.

A sickening delirium overtakes your mind.."Please Michael Bay...I just want to see the Robots!!! I can forgive you for casting Shia even..Don't do this to me!! Please ..don't!!"

Michael Bay doesn't acknowledge your pleas.. He grunts and groans as he violates your orifice. You scream in pain. The blood rushes through head as the stench grows worse. The tears flow. The sound of skin tearing adds to the horror. The revulsion is so great but there seems to no end to it. Michael Bay continues to rape you for over 2 hours..





By the way, I never saw the movie.
 
It's a summer blockbuster for God's sake. What did you expect? Explosions? Check! Car chases? Check! Hot ass girl in skimpy clothing? Check! Sure, it's not Citizen Kane, but it wasn't trying to be. Would you rather pay $10 to go see Year One? Or, if it's more your style, Bruno comes out next week.
 
[quote name='help1']We are all bitches in one way or another.[/QUOTE]

I didn't know that. Now that Help1 pointed that out, my life has soo much more meaning..
 
[quote name='help1']I bet you are scared of spiders.[/QUOTE]

I have a really big knife. Spiders don't scare me.
 
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