Wild Black Widow Spider Appears What Do You Do With Them?

200STM

CAGiversary!
Hey CAGs kinda of a random topic but what do you do if you happen to find a black widow spider in your yard? I personally would just catch them with gloves and move them into the field next to the place where I live. I live in Southern California where we get plenty of black widows to a point where they are in garages and in the places we commonly go to like a shed or even in the water hose faucet.
 
[quote name='musha666']I would spray the yard with pesticides and kill anything that moves.[/QUOTE]

+1.

fucking hate spiders and bugs in general.
 
If this doesn't work:

[quote name='JStryke']I'd let them bite me so I could turn into some sort of superhero.[/QUOTE]

Then I'd do this:

[quote name='mtxbass1']Burn it with fire.[/QUOTE]
 
I had a great aunt who was bit in the ass by a black widow in an old outhouse. With the moon cut into the wooden door and everything. (And yes, I come from hillbilly stock.)

Anyhow, this happened when I was roughly 5 or 6 years old and for the next 6 years of my life, anytime I was around that aunt my siblings and I would fight a tremendous case of the giggles. You'd stifle a laugh, look at the other guy, and his eyes said it all, She got bit on her huge lard ass by a black widow!

So that's what's kept me from arachnophobia, the thought of my aunt setting her fat ass on top of a black widow and the black widow responding with a "no, bad human, my outhouse."
 
Mo-

[quote name='RedvsBlue']Move[/QUOTE]

Fine, then I'd b-

[quote name='mtxbass1']Burn it with fire.[/QUOTE]

Ok fine then I'd get a bunch of pesticides and-

[quote name='musha666']I would spray the yard with pesticides and kill anything that moves.[/QUOTE]

Dammit. Then I would let it bite me so I'd

[quote name='JStryke']I'd let them bite me so I could turn into some sort of superhero.[/QUOTE]

DAMMIT. TAKE THE BLACK WIDOWS AND START

[quote name='Solid Scarecrow']I would start my own illegal underground Black widow fights in my basement[/QUOTE]

NOOOOO I WAS GOING TO SAY AN ARMY OF

[quote name='benjamouth']Collect a load and train them to be your unholy army of the night ![/QUOTE]

FINE, THE HELL WITH ALL OF YOU. I hope you all get bitten by my radioactive unholy army of illegal underground Black Widow fighters that survived the burnination and pesticide fallout. I'm going to start by putting them in outho-

[quote name='dothog']I had a great aunt who was bit in the ass by a black widow in an old outhouse. [/QUOTE]

OH YOU SMARMY SON OF A BITCH
 
This thread of full of the lulz. Since apparently you have gloves made of spider-proof iron, you should just pick it up and throw it through the car window of somebody driving by your house.
 
Capture it and milk its venin. Use said venin to poison the archduke's wine at your next masque party. Of course, there will be great scandal when he collapses in full view of all, and while the crime will be impossible to pin on you, your once-legendary gatherings of the region's elite will likely become greatly unpopular.

If you wish to avoid this, you could always coat your stilleto in the toxic extract and give it to le comte's second-eldest daughter. When she and the archduke "retire" to his private hansom cab, she will land the killing blow.
 
bread's done
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