wlau's Contest (Winner = SpazX)

wlau

wlau

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The contest has ended. The winner is SpazX.

Contest Rules:
  1. All registered members are eligible.
  2. To enter the contest, post a reply (an image, a joke, an anecdote, anything) in this thread. The number of replies you post has no bearing on your chances to win, so you are welcome to post as much or as little as you want.
  3. The contest will end on Thursday, September 14, 2006.
  4. A winner will be chosen at random.
  5. I will only ship to an address within the United States.
Prize Package:
  1. Luigi's Mansion GC (Complete)
  2. The Document of Metal Gear Solid 2 PS2 (No Manual)
  3. Swing Away Golf PS2 (Disc Only)
  4. Wakeboarding Unleashed f/ Shaun Murray GBA (New)
  5. Hydro Thunder DC (Complete)
  6. Rogue Trip PS1 (Complete)
  7. Eternal Eyes PS1 (Disc Only)
  8. Tiger Woods 2004 NGE (New)
  9. Operation Shadow NGE (New)
  10. Xbox Exhibition 2 Xbox (Disc Only)
  11. Hey You Pikachu! N64 (No Manual)
  12. The Italian Job DVD (Complete)
  13. Madcatz Component Cable PS2
  14. Kirby 64: The Crystal Shards Strategy Guide N64
  15. Metal Gear Solid 3 Snake Eater Guide PS2
  16. 2x Gravis Game Port Game Pads PC
  17. Dragon Quest VIII Demo PS2
  18. SSX On Tour Demo PS2
  19. Red Faction 2 Demo PS2
  20. Sony Holiday 2005 Demo PS2
  21. Second Sight Bonus Behind the Scenes DVD
  22. 2x Mortal Kombat Deception Kollector's Edition Sub Zero Trading Cards
  23. Pokemon Charizard Beanie Plush
  24. 7x Hollywood Video Rent 1 Get 1 Free Coupons
​
 
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The Hippie and the busdriver

One day there was a hippie who got on a bus. The bus was
very crowded and the man took a seat next to a young nun. He
was very attracted to the nun, because she was surprisingly
beautiful. After getting his courage up,he finally said to the
nun "Will you have sex with me?"

The nun,disgusted, told the bus driver to stop the bus and she
got off. The man was very disappointed and he moved up to
the front of the bus to wait for his stop.

Seeing that the young hippie was upset, the bus driver decided
to help him out. He said to the young man, "I know that nun.
Every night, she goes tothe grave yard at 9:00 to pray at the
grave of her friend. If you go thereand pretend that you are
Jesus, there is no way she would turn down God's request. Just
tell her that you are Jesus and ask her to have sex with
you."

This gave the hippie great hope.That night, he went to the
graveyard, and sure enough, there was the nun.As she kneeled
down, he decided to make his move. He walked over to her,
dressed in a white robe with a hood and said to the nun "I am
Jesus Christ, will you have sex with me?" Now, of course the
nun could not deny the power of God, so she agreed. "I just
have one request," said thenun, "it has to be anal sex, so I can
remain a virgin and continue in my sisterhood." The disguised
hippie agreed and the two had sex.

When they were done, the man thought that it would be funny
to reveal his identity to the nun. He took off his robe,
revealing a tye dyed shirt, ripped jeans, and hemp nacklaces.
"HA HA!! I'm not Jesus, I'm the hippie!" He exclaimed.

Much to the young man's surprise, the nun took off her habit,
revealing a gray shirt and gray pants. Laughing, she yelled
"HA HA! I'm not thenun, I'm the bus driver!"
 
Yay for contests! Too bad I've never won a random drawing in my life. Oh well, I'm even less likely to win if I don't enter :D
 
Bad joke but all I can think of at the moment.

A young man was working the cashier at a supermarket. A customer comes to his register with a head of lettuce but insists on only buying half of it. After arguing for awhile, the cashier goes to his manager's office, not noticing the customer following him.

He says to his boss, "there's this jerk outside that insists on buying only half a lettuce.....", then noticing the customer behind him finishes, "but fortunately, this kind gentleman here is willing to buy the other half, so everything should be okay."

The customer pleased at this, compliments the cashier to the manager and leaves happy. The manager, impressed, tells the cashier, "I'm really impressed on how you handled that. There's an opening for a manager's job in a new store in Canada, would you be interested in that?"

The cashier replies, "Nah, only dumb canucks and hockey players live in Canada."

The manager says "My wife is from Canada."

"Oh, what position does she play?"
 
Ok so I was kinda zoning out in the shower and I was thinking how someone told me that politics is everwhere, and a little later I was reading my shampoo because come on, I was bored but didn't feel like getting out. I read the instructions "apply liberally to hair" and the first thing that came to mind is why the hell does a donkey need so much shampoo? I'm not sure if thats a joke or just a story but its my submission.
 
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