"Went to bed, and of course I'm sharing a hotel room with like 7 people or whatever, sleeping on the floor. I woke up the next morning...and I can't open my eyes. And at first I thought it was like, I felt like, you ever have a lot of crust..." From #88.
This one kills me because, without putting too fine a point on it, back in college I helped my future wife into a similar situation.