Feeling tired? Well there is a 50% chance you have stomach parasites!

Soodmeg

CAGiversary!
:puke::puke::puke::puke:
The typical symptoms of worms include all types of gastrointestinal stress, rectal itching, itching on the skin and throughout the body, all manner of digestive discomfort which could include constipation and diarrhea. A crawling feeling is very commonly reported by people who have worms.
There are other symptoms but the main ones would be: anemia, chronic fatigue, inability to gain or lose weight, insatiable appetite (hungry all the time but never satisfied), any general gastrointestinal distress such as bloating, burping and belching. Key signs are rectal itching, especially when it seems to be worse between one and three a.m.. Some patients also report a worsening of these symptoms that we've already mentioned when the moon is full! It seems that worms living in the body become more active when there's a full moon. I guess if a wolf or dog howls, worms can be more active!
These are some of the key signs of worms. There are many others, but these tend to be the most outstanding.
How do I know that one out of six people have worms? In my practice we see many people who have chronic fatigue (which can be caused by a host of different viruses) and also chronic candida (a yeast infection in the intestines, vaginal, or genital area in men). Recently, we gave all the patients that we have with these conditions--which number in the hundreds--herbs which would expel worms if indeed these patients had them. To my amazement, 50% of those who took the herbs called up to tell us that they were seeing strange things in their feces. Very commonly, the scenario went like this: The patient took the herbs, then began to feel an increased amount of rectal itching or itching on the skin, increased amount of burning upon having a bowel movement, or an increase in some type of wet or moist feeling in the rectal area. This was then followed by abdominal cramps and pain upon which the person had to have an urgent bowel movement. Having the bowel movement, the patient reported seeing worms in their stool or in the toilet water. Some only saw a few, but one patient actually saw an entire handful! Luckily for these patients the worms were dead, as the herbs had killed them.
Statistically, after going over all the records, I found that it was just about half the patients. This tells me that 50% of all the people with chronic fatigue and candida have worms.


Link to article. http://vitaklenzforkidz.com/parasiteinfo.htm


Man...there are alot things in this word that are better left unknown.
 
Pony up the 50 bucks and see if you got worms.

If you come back with reports of worms in your shit then I'll know that I'm all set.
 
I watched a show on Discovery, or History about parasites, and worms. Oh man it was sick. I like how they don't tell us what herbs. I have none of the symptoms but you never know.
 
[quote name='Magehart']Do the worms Jazzercise my muscles and stimulate my brain?

Gumbercules ftw?[/QUOTE]
In b4 the bel aire!
 
This fact, if it is such, would be best presented to humanity without mention of worms. "Fact: Chronic Fatigue Cured By Herbal Cocktail!" There. They could even say the worms were just excess fat residue or something. Now that we know the truth, who among us has the cahones to find the truth?
 
[quote name='JimmieMac']Pony up the 50 bucks and see if you got worms.

If you come back with reports of worms in your shit then I'll know that I'm all set.[/QUOTE]

If you're gonna steal one of Mitch's jokes at least give credit where it's due.
 
[quote name='AshesofWake']that just seems like a site that's trying to sell their bullshit "herbs"[/QUOTE]

Regardless I believe most people in the civilized world DO have Parasites whether they want to come to terms and deal with it or not.
 
[quote name='Sarang01']Regardless I believe most people in the civilized world DO have Parasites whether they want to come to terms and deal with it or not.[/QUOTE]
And we have named them "children". I kid, I kid. Although, having been one, it's also true.
 
[quote name='greendc27']Thanks I just ordered a pizza. :puke:[/quote]
The Food and Drug Administration (FDA) allows 750 million pus cells in every liter of milk (about two pounds). In Europe, regulators allow 400 million pus cells per liter. France and Italy are known for their magnificent cheeses. Perhaps that's their secret: Less pus!
Since it takes 10 pounds of milk to make one pound of cheese, a pound of cheese can contain up to 7.5 billion pus cells. If your American cheese is sliced so that there are 16 slices to a pound, that single slice of American or Swiss can contain over 468 million pus cells.

Eighty percent of milk protein consists of casein, a tenacious glue. Casein is the glue that is used to hold a label to a bottle of beer. Try to scrape off one of those labels, then consider the effects of casein in your body. Casein is the glue that holds together wood in furniture. Behold the power of glue and behold the power of horrible bowel movements. Casein is a foreign protein and your body reacts to its presence by creating an antibody. That antibody-antigen reaction creates histamines. Anti-histamines (like Benadryl) are used to counter the effects of histamines. Mucus and phlegm are produced as a result of cheese consumption.
Mucus congests internal body organs. Mucus creates phlegm. The average American lives his or her life with a gallon of mucus clogging the kidney, spleen, pancreas, tracheal-bronchial tree, lungs, thymus, etc.
Imagine not eating cheese or any other dairy product for just six days. An internal fog will lift from your body as the mucus leaves. Eat just one slice of pizza on day seven, and twelve to fifteen hours later, the mucus will return.
http://www.notmilk.com/deb/071199.html
 
[quote name='Magehart']Do the worms Jazzercise my muscles and stimulate my brain?

Gumbercules ftw?[/quote]

Winner!
 
[quote name='Sarang01']Regardless I believe most people in the civilized world DO have Parasites whether they want to come to terms and deal with it or not.[/QUOTE]Oh, they do. Pinworm infection is crazy high. But who wants to kill them? They reproduce sexually and sit in your lower intestine cleaning up the food your lazy body didn't process. They're like little hobos, but not the crazy ones. They're the harmless ones.
 
All I can say as a health care professional is take everything you read on the internet about medical information with a grain of salt, unless it's from reputable source such as the NIH.
 
Nothing rouses up paranoia that so conveniently leads to buying your product than worms.

I've heard a lot about how milk is bad for many other reasons.. Anyone have any idea how much of it is BS?
 
[quote name='dopa345']All I can say as a health care professional is take everything you read on the internet about medical information with a grain of salt, unless it's from reputable source such as the NIH.[/QUOTE]
Is that regular table salt, sea salt, epsom salts? I need to get these critters out of my.....friend's....yes....friend's......system.....IMMEDIATELY!!!
 
[quote name='Eviltude']In b4 the bel aire![/QUOTE]
fresh.jpg

[quote name='Will Smith - Bel-Air Theme Song']Now, this is a story all about how
My life got flipped-turned upside down
And I liked to take a minute
Just sit right there
I'll tell you how I became the prince of a town called Bel Air

In west Philadelphia born and raised
On the playground was where I spent most of my days
Chillin' out maxin' relaxin' all cool
And all shootin some b-ball outside of the school
When a couple of guys
Who were up to no good
Startin makin trouble in my neighborhood
I got in one lil fight and my mom got scared
She said 'You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in bel Air'

I begged and pleaded with her day after day
But she packed my suite case and send me on my way
She gave me a kiss and then she gave me my ticket.
I put my walkman on and said, 'I might as well kick it'.

First class, yo this is bad
Drinking orang juice out of a champagne glass.
Is this what the people of Bel-Air Living like?
Hmmmmm this might be alright.

But wait I hear the pricey booze, wine all that
Is Bel-Air the type of place they send this cool cat?
I don't think sow
I'll see when I get there
I hope they're prepared for the prince of Bel-Air

Well, the plane landed and when I came out
There was a dude who looked like a cop and yelled my name out
I ain't trying to get arrested
I just got here
I sprang with the quickness like lightening, disappeared

I whistled for a cab and when it came near
The license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror
If anything I can say this cab is rare
But I thought 'Now forget it' - 'Yo homes to Bel Air'

I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8
And I yelled to the cabbie 'Yo homes smell ya later'
I looked at my kingdom
I was finally there
To sit on my throne as the Prince of Bel Air[/quote]
 
[quote name='Dead of Knight']Yeah, I have to say I have some of those symptoms and that really scares me... :puke:[/QUOTE]There's a mental disorder where you think you have parasites, too, though.
 
[quote name='jmcc']I'm going to kill an animal now, as I do whenever a PETA bit gets through to my sight.[/quote]

LoL - I still eat meat and wear leather, never fear.

All I know is, I quit drinking milk and really cut down on cheese, and 75% of my sinus problems have dissappeared. I only get sinus headaches now when I go out for a run in the smog (or I'm forced into a cheese pizza at a party).
 
This parasite is more fun

A COMMON parasite can increase a women's attractiveness to the opposite sex but also make men more stupid, an Australian researcher says.

About 40 per cent of the world's population is infected with Toxoplasma gondii, including about eight million Australians.

Human infection generally occurs when people eat raw or undercooked meat that has cysts containing the parasite, or accidentally ingest some of the parasite's eggs excreted by an infected cat.

...

"Infected men have lower IQs, achieve a lower level of education and have shorter attention spans. They are also more likely to break rules and take risks, be more independent, more anti-social, suspicious, jealous and morose, and are deemed less attractive to women.

"On the other hand, infected women tend to be more outgoing, friendly, more promiscuous, and are considered more attractive to men compared with non-infected controls.

"In short, it can make men behave like alley cats and women behave like sex kittens''.

http://www.news.com.au/story/0,10117,20975555-29277,00.html?from=public_rss
 
[quote name='jmcc']There's a mental disorder where you think you have parasites, too, though.[/quote]

There's also hypochondria. It is being afraid of illness in general. Many people are diagnosed with that.

I used to be a big hypochondriact when I was younger. I would be so afraid of throwing up that I would make myself sick just worrying about it all the time. Eventually I grew out of that, though when I see someone throwing up I still get a small amount of fear.
 
Sometimes it's hard to know exactly what to post in threads like this. Picking the right response is so hard! Help me out with my response to this one, guys:

A.) So, help me out here because all of this is kinda confusing... is it or is it *not* normal to have your anus itch and burn when you poop??

B.) So there's a 1 in 6 chance that I've got ass worms? Why they hell didn't I hear about this on the CAGcast? I swear that show is so uninformative.

C.) Five'll get ya ten that Paris Hilton has some ass worms... in her ass.

D.) This thread's good, but too educational. Needs more mvick288. http://http://www.cheapassgamer.com/forums/showthread.php?t=125590
 
[quote name='Rig']There's also hypochondria. It is being afraid of illness in general. Many people are diagnosed with that.

I used to be a big hypochondriact when I was younger. I would be so afraid of throwing up that I would make myself sick just worrying about it all the time. Eventually I grew out of that, though when I see someone throwing up I still get a small amount of fear.[/QUOTE]Well, it's a variation of it, I suppose, but it's more specific than that.
 
[quote name='David85']See if anyone gets the reference...

But they make me smarter!

It's from a TV show.[/quote]

Futurama ftw.

In any case, I do have some of those symptoms but I really don't care. If you only knew what was in your eyelashes you would be going insane.
 
[quote name='sonderiaom']Futurama ftw.

In any case, I do have some of those symptoms but I really don't care. If you only knew what was in your eyelashes you would be going insane.[/quote]


UMMMMM........what the hell?
 
[quote name='sonderiaom']Futurama ftw.

In any case, I do have some of those symptoms but I really don't care. If you only knew what was in your eyelashes you would be going insane.[/QUOTE]

Yeah, it's actually pretty cool, a good example of a symbiotic relationship.
 
[quote name='Soodmeg']UMMMMM........what the hell?[/quote]

One of the few things I actually gleamed about Biology in school

Demodex Mites They live in our eyelashes and eat away all the old skin and stuff. At night they can move around your skin. Ever wonder why you woke up with some stuff in the corner of your eye at night?

Anyway, after I heard about that stuff, I'm pretty ok with anything in my body that doesn't really kill me right away.
 
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