From The Onion: Half Of 26-Year-Old's Memories Nintendo-Related

EastBayAnt

EastBayAnt

CAGiversary!
It's funny (and sad) because you know it's true:

From the article:

BROOKLYN, NY—Nearly 50 percent of 26-year-old paralegal Philip Jenkins' encoded long-term memories involve button combinations, game-playing experiences, and spatial-cognitive maps of various levels and worlds from Nintendo's line of video-game consoles, a team of neuroscientists reported Tuesday.


The memory-evaluation study, headed by Dr. Franklin McCarroll of New York University's School of Psychology, revealed that approximately 47 percent of Jenkins' hippocampus is dedicated to storing notable video-game victories and frustrating last-minute defeats, while 32 percent of his amygdala contains embedded neurological scripts pertaining to game strategies, character back stories, theme songs, and cheat codes. In addition, his entire dorsolateral prefrontal cortex is devoted to remembering the time he did a helicopter dunk from half-court with Shawn Kemp at the buzzer to beat the Charlotte Hornets 82-81 in NBA Jam: Tournament Edition.
Click to expand...

(Click for the rest of the article)

(I didn't know where to post this, but it was too funny to pass up...) :lol:
 
[quote name='GogoTheMimic']Great article, I loved the part about NBA Jam:TE(still the best in the series!).[/QUOTE]

agreed.. i still have 150 wins and 1 loss on my SNES copy.. that one loss came to my friend Travis when i was in the 3rd grade (many many years ago)...

NBA Street Vol 2 has been the only basketball game that i enjoyed as much as that.
 
Nintendo-based memories are also among Jenkins' most frequently retrieved, researcher Dr. Francis Holbrook said. A series of recent tests suggest that when Jenkins accesses stored information in response to visual or mental cues, he is most likely to remember his family's trip to Disney World, followed by the time he beat the dreaded Stage 57 on Bubble Bobble without losing a life, the first time he rode a bike, the exact route he made Bo Jackson run to defeat his friend Jason Whitner at Tecmo Bowl, hiding underneath his covers while his parents fought noisily in the adjoining room, and the locations of the three warp whistles in Super Mario Bros. 3.
Click to expand...

Brilliant.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
bread's done
Back
Top