How do I QUIT my JOB to play VIDEO GAMES all day and NOT get DIVORCED?

Javery

Javery

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It's a real problem. Instead of coming to work every day, I'd rather just sit on the couch and play video games. I don't think the wife would go for that though... There's got to be a subtle way to get her to agree to it. Oh yeah, I'd also need her to continue to work full time to pay for everything. Any ideas?
 
[quote name='javeryh']It's a real problem. Instead of coming to work every day, I'd rather just sit on the couch and play video games. I don't think the wife would go for that though... There's got to be a subtle way to get her to agree to it. Oh yeah, I'd also need her to continue to work full time to pay for everything. Any ideas?[/QUOTE]

Um, tell her that your firm has put you on a super secret project...Jack Thompson and a bunch wack-jobs are bringing about a huge class action against the game industry, and you've been assigned to working due dilligence while the case is being explored. Now, they want to keep this secret, so they can't have a paper trail connecting them to you... but for all of your hard work, you and your family will be rewarded later. Of course, they know this would put a strain on your family and force your wife to work, but no one ever said making partner would be easy, did they? :lol:
 
[quote name='JSweeney']Um, tell her that your firm has put you on a super secret project...Jack Thompson and a bunch wack-jobs are bringing about a huge class action against the game industry, and you've been assigned to working due dilligence while the case is being explored. Now, they want to keep this secret, so they can't have a paper trail connecting them to you... but for all of your hard work, you and your family will be rewarded later. Of course, they know this would put a strain on your family and force your wife to work, but no one ever said making partner would be easy, did they? :lol:[/QUOTE]
Wow, that's brilliant!
 
[quote name='javeryh']It's a real problem. Instead of coming to work every day, I'd rather just sit on the couch and play video games. I don't think the wife would go for that though... There's got to be a subtle way to get her to agree to it. Oh yeah, I'd also need her to continue to work full time to pay for everything. Any ideas?[/QUOTE]

Graduate School

;)
 
Start up a real estate firm. Start buying local apartments and manage them. Try buying around college towns/areas as they're always keep your places full of rent. Don't have more than you can chew. If you can only handle one apartment complex for now then only buy/manage one. Once you get comfortable, you can start buying more complexes/hiring more staff to assist in management. Raise rents while keeping an eye on local rent control laws to offset incoming staff salaries. Management is easy - usually requires only 2-4 days work out of the whole month barring any major repairs to the property. Sit on your ass and play video games. Profit.
 
Fake an illness.

Or pretend to suffer from chronic backpain etc..

If you get sick time at work you will even get paid.

After a month or so sitting on your ass and playing video games loses its zip.
 
[quote name='JSweeney']Um, tell her that your firm has put you on a super secret project...Jack Thompson and a bunch wack-jobs are bringing about a huge class action against the game industry, and you've been assigned to working due dilligence while the case is being explored. Now, they want to keep this secret, so they can't have a paper trail connecting them to you... but for all of your hard work, you and your family will be rewarded later. Of course, they know this would put a strain on your family and force your wife to work, but no one ever said making partner would be easy, did they? :lol:[/QUOTE]

That's brilliant! I'd have to figure out a way to make the assignment last indefinitely because once I got figured out it would be Dumpsville for me...
 
I'll go in on this with you as I am in the same situation. We cover each others story with the wifeys. God I wish I was independently wealthy like the guy in About a Boy.
 
[quote name='javeryh']Instead of coming to work every day, I'd rather just sit on the couch and play video games. [/QUOTE]


I thought the same thing then after I quit my last job. I have been home for about 5 days and it gets kinda old. I'm ready to go back to working.
 
[quote name='javeryh']That's brilliant! I'd have to figure out a way to make the assignment last indefinitely because once I got figured out it would be Dumpsville for me...[/QUOTE]

Yes, the exit strategy does need some work... there's no way that that scenario could end well.
 
[quote name='Graystone']I thought the same thing then after I quit my last job. I have been home for about 5 days and it gets kinda old. I'm ready to go back to working.[/QUOTE]

Well, yeah, but I doubt you've shit yourself at work.
:lol:
 
[quote name='JSweeney']Well, yeah, but I doubt you've shit yourself at work.
:lol:[/QUOTE]

Man that story will outlast him :lol: No I have not shit myself at work.
 
[quote name='Graystone']Man that story will outlast him :lol: No I have not shit myself at work.[/QUOTE]

It was only a shart!!!! There was no log!!!
 
[quote name='javeryh']It was only a shart!!!! There was no log!!![/QUOTE]


If its brown, its a shit.

Hmm, there's a phrase I never thought I would ever type.
 
[quote name='javeryh']It was only a shart!!!! There was no log!!![/QUOTE]

If the pants were stained, you must refrain.
 
tell your boss that he/she sexually harrassed you and tell them you will get paid a year for stayin at home and then kick your own ass in the boss' office ala fight club. You will either have a great story and money or at least a great story.
 
Its easy. Say you want to stay home and take care of the kids/keep the house tidy. Vacuum every other day, make supper and spend 15 minutes straitening shit. You're not off the hook totally, but the 2-3 hour commitment beats the shit outta a 10 hour work day.
 
Get pregnant. Sure it will be difficult with you being a guy and all but still if that excuse works for women, equal opportunity for all!
 
[quote name='RedvsBlue']Get pregnant. Sure it will be difficult with you being a guy and all but still if that excuse works for women, equal opportunity for all![/QUOTE]

If only... we do have a 12 week leave for primary caretakers policy for kids so probably when the next kid is born i'm out of here!
 
[quote name='alonzomourning23']Buy her rez with the vibrator?[/QUOTE]


Well yeah but she needs to be at work while he's playing the games. Someone needs to bring home the bacon.
 
Step 1: Organize a group or militia of gamers from Cheap Ass Gamer.

Step 2: Get backing from Sony, MS or Nintendo.

Step 3: Buy a city and rename it VGLand.

Step 4: Only gamers can live there and everything is free. (Women are allowed if they are with the gamer)

Step 5: Get fat and constantly have red burned out eyes.
 
[quote name='U2K Tha Greate$t']Why do you feel the need to play games all day?

And besides, what type of games are you playing?[/QUOTE]

Anything beats work. I wouldn't want to play all day I guess. I'd probably want to squeeze in a little porn watching and some heavy drinking.
 
[quote name='the3rdkey']Step 1: Organize a group or militia of gamers from Cheap Ass Gamer.

Step 2: Get backing from Sony, MS or Nintendo.

Step 3: Buy a city and rename it VGLand.

Step 4: Only gamers can live there and everything is free. (Women are allowed if they are with the gamer)

Step 5: Get fat and constantly have red burned out eyes.[/QUOTE]

Isn't that kind of sexist? What if a gamer is a woman?
 
[quote name='U2K Tha Greate$t']Why do you feel the need to play games all day?

And besides, what type of games are you playing?[/QUOTE]

why do you feel the need to breathe perfectly good air? :roll:
 
How can your bitch be working and cooking at the same time? You need to become a mormon so you can have one working bitch, one bitch in the kitchen, and a bitch for screwing.
 
I didn't read the rest of the thread yet, but I'd say just get yourself fired. After a few months you can start looking for a job that doesn't keep you away from home all the time. :lol:
 
heres an idea...install an xbox or ps2 in your car and some screens...pretend to go to work and just play video games in your car lol
 
[quote name='the3rdkey']Step 1: Organize a group or militia of gamers from Cheap Ass Gamer.

Step 2: Get backing from Sony, MS or Nintendo.

Step 3: Buy a city and rename it VGLand.

Step 4: Only gamers can live there and everything is free. (Women are allowed if they are with the gamer)

Step 5: Get fat and constantly have red burned out eyes.[/QUOTE]

I'm all for it, except for the "if they are with the gamer" part. that promotes a high male per female ratio. the women should be competing for US, not the other way around. jeez. ;-)
 
[quote name='Apossum']I'm all for it, except for the "if they are with the gamer" part. that promotes a high male per female ratio. the women should be competing for US, not the other way around. jeez. ;-)[/QUOTE]

Go to college then, many colleges are 60-70% women, and both of the ones I've been to have been just under 65% women. Honestly though, it's not any easier or harder when there are more women.
 
[quote name='javeryh']Anything beats work. I wouldn't want to play all day I guess. I'd probably want to squeeze in a little porn watching and some heavy drinking.[/QUOTE]

Dude, just quit your job and tell your woman that you've found your true calling. Tell her that you want to be a "fine artist" and need a year to work on your portfolio. Throw some paint on a canvas 1 day a month and play video games and watch porn in between. When your year is almost up, tell her that the gallery that was interested in your work has folded and that the owner has left the country. Apply for another lawyer gig and tell them that in the year you took off you were helping your family cope with the death of your younger brother.

Works every time.
 
[quote name='alonzomourning23']Go to college then, many colleges are 60-70% women, and both of the ones I've been to have been just under 65% women. Honestly though, it's not any easier or harder when there are more women.[/QUOTE]


well, next semester I will be at a "real" college. but college isn't video game land dammit! er, wait, it kinda is....video game, beer and paper-writing land.
 
[quote name='Apossum']well, next semester I will be at a "real" college. but college isn't video game land dammit! er, wait, it kinda is....video game, beer and paper-writing land.[/QUOTE]

Ya, hopefully I'll say the same thing by september of next year. I am at a real college now, it just sucks. The admission requirement starts and ends with "do you have a pulse?" The student body here is 95% white, and the biggest concern anyone has is if there's enough beer. My old schools primary concern was politics, and over 50% of the students were born in other countries (and about 50% of the students were visible minorities). I don't even have a teacher with an accent, not even one from another part of america.

That's what happens when you realize you need to transfer in june and your old university doesn't send out your info and you're given wrong directions on how the whole transfer process works.

I swear it's something about me, whether it's my credit card company, my university, my bank, whatever, I always get wrong info. The last question I asked to my current school I asked to 3 people (the people in charge of transfers, finances, and student counseling) and then looked online, out of 4 different sources I got 4 different answers. I still don't know the answer to my question.
 
[quote name='zionoverfire']Convert to a religious sect that doesn't believe in divorce.[/QUOTE]hell, while your at it, make a new religion that doesnt allow men to work
 
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