I literally met the woman of my dreams, but there's a catch. A must read.

wageslave

wageslave

CAGiversary!
Back when I was in 5th grade and eleven years old I had a dream that I shaq-fu’d this other girl in my class in one of the 4th grade classrooms when nobody else was around. It was my first and still one of my nastiest dreams ever and I remember it vividly. I...er…sunk the battleship, everything went bright white, and I drifted away from my body. Not sure if I messed my jockeys while sleeping – but if I ever have it was at that moment. I was a shy goody two shoes fat kid in 5th grade and of course I never told anybody or did anything about it. She was a cute blond girl with freckles back then. We’d both be well over legal drinking age now BTW.

Fast foreword to thirty minutes ago and I run into this chick in a C-Store. She recognized me, I didn’t recognize her because she looks pretty different, and we talked a bit. I’m single, and she’s divorced and has a kid. We hugged casually and I told her I had a “thing for her back in the day”. She asked me for my phone number and I gave it to her. Unfortunately I kind of get a trailer trash street walker vibe. She was thin and somewhat presentable, but has kind of a rough vibe – I can’t explain it. She looks 10 years older than I do and I wonder if there may be some chemicals or other activities involved. She told me she cleans houses these days. Not that I try to judge people by their job, but I wents to college and have a completely different lifestyle than that.

It's tempting and maybe I'm wrong about her, but I better not. Think I'll tell her I’m engaged. Damn, though, I can just image making my wildest dream come true. Would make for a great quickie if I wasn’t afraid for my health. There might be “5th Grade Dream, Part II” going on tonight though.
 
Crystal meth?

Take her out on one date, otherwise you're being presumptuous and elitist. That one date will let you know if she has any genuine psychological/substance baggage that you want to stay away from.
 
Disturbing about the whole "fifth grade dream" thing tonight. She looks nasty and has a kid.. I wouldn't bother.

Maybe she's been smoking for 5+ years. That junk makes you look older than you are real quick.
 
[quote name='shrike4242']Some would say otherwise from this nugget of literary wisdom.[/quote]

t'was intentional sarcasm
 
[quote name='shrike4242']Some would say otherwise from this nugget of literary wisdom.[/QUOTE]

Must of been de cholege for teh ghetto thuga! :lol:
 
[quote name='coltyhuxx']This thread+DJK8E thread=flacid penis for the rest of the day.[/quote]

QFT
 
[quote name='wageslave']Back when I was in 5th grade and eleven years old I had a dream that I shaq-fu’d this other girl in my class in one of the 4th grade classrooms when nobody else was around. It was my first and still one of my nastiest dreams ever and I remember it vividly. I...er…sunk the battleship, everything went bright white, and I drifted away from my body. Not sure if I messed my jockeys while sleeping – but if I ever have it was at that moment. I was a shy goody two shoes fat kid in 5th grade and of course I never told anybody or did anything about it. She was a cute blond girl with freckles back then. We’d both be well over legal drinking age now BTW.

Fast foreword to thirty minutes ago and I run into this chick in a C-Store. She recognized me, I didn’t recognize her because she looks pretty different, and we talked a bit. I’m single, and she’s divorced and has a kid. We hugged casually and I told her I had a “thing for her back in the day”. She asked me for my phone number and I gave it to her. Unfortunately I kind of get a trailer trash street walker vibe. She was thin and somewhat presentable, but has kind of a rough vibe – I can’t explain it. She looks 10 years older than I do and I wonder if there may be some chemicals or other activities involved. She told me she cleans houses these days. Not that I try to judge people by their job, but I wents to college and have a completely different lifestyle than that.

It's tempting and maybe I'm wrong about her, but I better not. Think I'll tell her I’m engaged. Damn, though, I can just image making my wildest dream come true. Would make for a great quickie if I wasn’t afraid for my health. There might be “5th Grade Dream, Part II” going on tonight though. [/quote]

Are you going to cheat on your fiancee' or did you break up with her?

http://www.cheapassgamer.com/forums/showthread.php?t=103927
 
Shaq-fu her so you can realize your dream and then throw that meth-whore to the streets where she belongs.

Don't forget to wear protection.
 
[quote name='mykevermin']Take her out on one date, otherwise you're being presumptuous and elitist. That one date will let you know if she has any genuine psychological/substance baggage that you want to stay away from.[/QUOTE]

I agree, one date won't hurt. At worse you spend some money on buying her dinner.
 
[quote name='wageslave']Broke up a while back. This girl I met up with tonite looks better than my "ex" for what it was worth. [/quote]

Soap?
 
[quote name='wageslave']Broke up a while back. This girl I met up with tonite looks better than my "ex" for what it was worth. [/quote]

My condolensces
 
[quote name='wageslave']Broke up a while back. This girl I met up with tonite looks better than my "ex" for what it was worth. [/QUOTE]

Huh. I'd say go out to dinner with her. Everyone's got some crazy mental image of her, but I'd imagine it's not as bad as all that -- I believe in you, wageslave!

I would, however, be concerned about the baby mama drama, to use the parlance of our times. What if the father is still actively involved? Awkward!

Yes... the more I think about it, the more I am certain you should pursue this and provide regular updates. And a way to contact your ex, in case anybody on here is lonely or whatever, you know?
 
She's divorced, got a kid, a potential trailer trash street walker, and potential drug abuser? Sounds like a right winner to me.
 
[quote name='Maklershed']Are you going to cheat on your fiancee' or did you break up with her?

http://www.cheapassgamer.com/forums/showthread.php?t=103927[/QUOTE]
snap.jpg
 
[quote name='mykevermin']Crystal meth?

Take her out on one date, otherwise you're being presumptuous and elitist. That one date will let you know if she has any genuine psychological/substance baggage that you want to stay away from.[/quote]

Seconded. There's no harm in a harmless dinner.

Because it's harmless.
 
So if she looked that bad, and the OP was pretty much disgusted with her, why even bother telling her he had a thing for her back in the day?

Seemed like a stupid thing to do.

"She is divorced, has a kid, cleans houses for a living so she's obviously uneducated, she looks like she is on drugs and looks 10 years older than she is... so I told her I had a thing for her in 5th grade".
 
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