Ideas on how to spend my dad's multi-$100's screw up money?

M

minx

CAGiversary!
Now I'll admit, it takes a lot to make me cry. So I'm not really sure why this particular fuck up made me snap.

The first thing I noticed when he came home was that my clothes had dry cleaning bags on them. I'm allergic to nearly everything, so the last thing I would ever allow on my clothes is unnecessary chemicals. I then noticed there were things missing -- very expensive things . The top half of a $300 {on sale} dress and a similarly priced beaded sweater from the same sale.

In the mist of the back and forth screaming, I removed dry cleaning bags from what was left to discover that the repairs the clothes had actually gone to dry cleaners for had not been performed despite me taping labels on all of them before they left the house just in case my father miss explained what needed to be done.

And then, I discovered the dry cleaners had shredded the writing on the front of one of the shirts to be repaired {the only repair they actually performed was performed to this sleeve, which they darned instead of reweaving as I asked.

It was at this point I discovered he had no receipts for any of this, despite having just come from there, and I realized I had no recourse to prove one way or another whether he had lost the stuff or if they did.

Still, I think I could've handled the loss had he not started claiming innocence to the whole thing. In between the " I'm sorry"'s were a lot of "I don't know what you're talking about"'s. About the very same things we been talking about the entire time.. Now granted, this is the usual tactic for getting rid of me when he's done wrong, but this time I snapped and cried -- and he actually feels guilty for once.

He's offered to replace what was destroyed/lost and after I pointed out that they couldn't be, he said he'd get me something expensive to make up for it.
The kicker =

I don't particularly want anything.

And to replace the clothes, even if it were financially possible considering these were sales items, it's almost impossible to get things that fit.

Ideas on what to ask for?
 
[quote name='hutno']Ask for his soul[/quote]

bwah ha ha ha :twisted:
aside from that, that really sucks, but if you aren't using the money, i sure can. how about a car or something? a cheap little car that will probably fall apart quickly.
 
If there isn't anything you want, don't try to come up with something just because you can. Tell him you accept his apology, and thank him for his offer. That, or a kick ass TV (jk).
 
Is he offering you the option of a cash settlement? If so, just take the money and save it. That way when you do want something, you'll be all set with the cash.
 
[quote name='int80h']I work as a male prostitute on the side. $150/hr. Women only.[/quote]

We like to call those gigolos.. and $150/hr will put you out of business, only the A+ get that sort of rate.
 
[quote name='int80h']I work as a male prostitute on the side. $150/hr. Women only.[/quote]

Shit, I work for free (well maybe breakfast the next morning)...and I actually look decent....(if you think a mix between Keanu Reeves/Quientin Tarentino, is decent looking)

So just tell him you want alot of cereal....I prefer Golden Grahams
 
[quote name='Zenithian Legend']How about you invest it in an English class at your local community college... your writing hurts the horse's eyes.[/quote]

You must be joking. With all the English-butcherers on this board, you pick on minx?
 
[quote name='guessed'][quote name='Zenithian Legend']How about you invest it in an English class at your local community college... your writing hurts the horse's eyes.[/quote]

You must be joking. With all the English-butcherers on this board, you pick on minx?[/quote]

ChrisXE is the one that needs a english class. His engrish is worse than an illegal alien's. You two's english is just fine.

Oh on what to buy, you can bid on one of those prerelase Halo 2's. Either that or a lifetime supply of Ho-ho's (or zingers, damn I love zingers).
 
[quote name='guessed'][quote name='Zenithian Legend']How about you invest it in an English class at your local community college... your writing hurts the horse's eyes.[/quote]

You must be joking. With all the English-butcherers on this board, you pick on minx?[/quote]

eh, you could be right, I've been up over 24 hours working the last 10 of them, so as I read and re-read again I realize perhaps this is the horse's own fault.

And minx is not the first to get the grammar nazi treatment.
 
You could buy some self respect. Or perhaps you could buy some appreciation for your father who works for your existence by putting a roof over your head and food in the refrigerator.

Your story doesn't make sense. You were suprised to see all the dry cleaning bags, yet you labled the clothes for repair beforehand? Why would you be suprised if you knew they were going in for repairs ?



IMO you sound like a spoiled brat. But I guess that IS your father's fault to begin with.
 
Well if you really don't want anything right now, why not hold onto this sympathy card for another time?

If you want something now, try asking for a party or an expense-paid for night on the town.
 
[quote name='bmulligan']You could buy some self respect. Or perhaps you could buy some appreciation for your father who works for your existence by putting a roof over your head and food in the refrigerator.

Your story doesn't make sense. You were suprised to see all the dry cleaning bags, yet you labled the clothes for repair beforehand? Why would you be suprised if you knew they were going in for repairs ?



IMO you sound like a spoiled brat. But I guess that IS your father's fault to begin with.[/quote]

SEE! I knew I wasn't the only one struggling to make sense of that story. Although, how can anyone from Brighton call someone a spoiled brat... :roll:

Well... anyway, I think it was the dress and crying business that really threw me off, I didn't know minx was female. I just thought... man, what the hell is wrong with this guy?
 
[quote name='Zenithian Legend'][quote name='bmulligan']You could buy some self respect. Or perhaps you could buy some appreciation for your father who works for your existence by putting a roof over your head and food in the refrigerator.

Your story doesn't make sense. You were suprised to see all the dry cleaning bags, yet you labled the clothes for repair beforehand? Why would you be suprised if you knew they were going in for repairs ?



IMO you sound like a spoiled brat. But I guess that IS your father's fault to begin with.[/quote]

SEE! I knew I wasn't the only one struggling to make sense of that story. Although, how can anyone from Brighton call someone a spoiled brat... :roll:

Well... anyway, I think it was the dress and crying business that really threw me off, I didn't know minx was female. I just thought... man, what the hell is wrong with this guy?[/quote]

Yo bitch, I only live in Brighton, I grew up in Oak Park.
 
You should ask your dad to take you somewhere for the weekend and you guys could have some father-daughter time. It's obvious you're more upset with your dad's insensitivity than you are about the clothes.

Time is more valuable than anything else. Since you don't want anything tangible, get him to take you to do something you've always wanted to do and have some memories to tell your kids about some day.

More valuable than a stockpile of video games or a big-screen TV in my opinion.
 
[quote name='chosen1s']
More valuable than a stockpile of video games or a big-screen TV in my opinion.[/quote]

Obviously you don't own a big screen TV....
 
[quote name='bmulligan'][quote name='chosen1s']
More valuable than a stockpile of video games or a big-screen TV in my opinion.[/quote]

Obviously you don't own a big screen TV....[/quote]

Or you don't have any good memories with your family...

:p
 
Ok, if there isn't anything you want, invest it. I'd suggest something simple and stable like some bonds or CD's or something along those lines. If you can't use the money now, don't waste it, because you will sure have a use for it in the future, so you might as well have more of it in the future.
 
[quote name='bmulligan']You could buy some self respect. Or perhaps you could buy some appreciation for your father who works for your existence by putting a roof over your head and food in the refrigerator.

Your story doesn't make sense. You were suprised to see all the dry cleaning bags, yet you labled the clothes for repair beforehand? Why would you be suprised if you knew they were going in for repairs ?



IMO you sound like a spoiled brat. But I guess that IS your father's fault to begin with.[/quote]

Wow the crowd is getting a bit testy. Maybe you should throw in some nudity into the story :wink: But if it is cash he's offering you, keep until some thing does come to mind. Impulse purchases have a way of making you regret it later on.
 
I'd wait for another really good sale where you expect to find more good clothes that fit. Getting value in kind for the loss would seem appropriate.
 
[quote name='dcfox'][quote name='bmulligan']You could buy some self respect. Or perhaps you could buy some appreciation for your father who works for your existence by putting a roof over your head and food in the refrigerator.

Your story doesn't make sense. You were suprised to see all the dry cleaning bags, yet you labled the clothes for repair beforehand? Why would you be suprised if you knew they were going in for repairs ?



IMO you sound like a spoiled brat. But I guess that IS your father's fault to begin with.[/quote]

Wow the crowd is getting a bit testy. Maybe you should throw in some nudity into the story :wink: [/quote]

Most of her clothes are gone, I thought nudity was implied. It was certainly inferred, anyway. :wink:
 
Some more mature children would think of their future when presented with a sum of money such as this. But obviously daddy already has a fat wallet so you don't have to worry about that, eh?

Perhaps you could find a worthy charity to donate to? $600 would go a long way toward making some underprivlidged children have a merry christmas this year. You could feed a lot of families on Thanksgiving as well. $600 buys a LOT of turkey. You could also write it off on your taxes if you itemize. Are you old enough to do that yet ?
 
[quote name='guessed'][quote name='Zenithian Legend']How about you invest it in an English class at your local community college... your writing hurts the horse's eyes.[/quote]

You must be joking. With all the English-butcherers on this board, you pick on minx?[/quote]

I agree. With people like Slidecage, you really can't make fun of minx.
 
This thread is turning into a snake pit, sorry about the clothes but if you have the bags, can't you go right back in there with them, I mean most places have pretty understanding people and they probably saw your clothes at some point in time, I mean I don't know anyone who has a beaded sweater. try just going back and getting stuff fixed.
 
[quote name='punqsux']wow looks like i just walked into DLF's blog :wink:

ask for a robot.[/quote]

have it....lego mindstorms...my dad destroyed the starter kit by scattering the set to the four winds ,but I managed to salvage most of it and stll have some unopened expansion packs

[quote name='hutno']Ask for his soul[/quote]

not sure he has one ;-)

[quote name='Othergods']2005 Toyota Prius?[/quote]

ewwwww!

[quote name='Ikohn4ever']ask him to buy me somethin, that would be really nice[/quote]

How about we have him buy you breast implants so you can go clothes shopping for me, and you'll try everything on to make sure it fits me ;-)

I hate clothes shopping ......

[quote name='biggestinuyashafan'] how about a car or something? a cheap little car that will probably fall apart quickly.[/quote]

Already trying to get rid of my car, and don't want another one right now.

[quote name='guessed']If there isn't anything you want, don't try to come up with something just because you can. Tell him you accept his apology, and thank him for his offer. That, or a kick ass TV (jk).[/quote]

Yeah , but being generous usually just means he gets to walk all over me yet again. Not the first time he destroyed something of mine by any means, but him offering to do something about is so rare I would hate to let the opportunity slip by that have something good come out of what so far an unredeemable disaster.

[quote name='int80h']I work as a male prostitute on the side. $150/hr. Women only.[/quote]


Somehow, I think you missed title of the site

You're supposed to have a cheap ass !

Your ass is way too expensive to be on this web site ;-)

[quote name='chickenhawk']Is he offering you the option of a cash settlement? If so, just take the money and save it. That way when you do want something, you'll be all set with the cash.[/quote]

Doesn't want to give me cash -- he wants to buy me a "present" to make up for it.

[quote name='jbroush99']Ask for 100 more wishes. When you get down to your last wish, ask for 100 more.[/quote]


But don't those things always have a way of backfiring?

I could have sworn there was a Simpson's episode this ;-)

[quote name='doubledown']How can you not replace clothes?

or

Get a Plastic Bubble since you are allergic to a LOT of things ;)[/quote]

Apparently the manufacturers have a really hard time putting certain concepts together.

For example, most clothing manufacturers believe that all women wear a b cup bra -- unless the woman in question is really fat, in which case they might make enough room in the top for a c-cup. I couldn't squeeze into a c-- cup on a bet and most women's tops are designed around bra size for fit. In other words, you cannot be thin and big busted unless you are in Al Bundy's Biggins ;-)

Another problem they have is combining colorful with tall. If you are tall you are screwed looking for fun clothes because only the junior section carries fun clothes that are occasionally cut for tall people {and these are cut so that the girls who wear them look like boys -- very scary ;-)

Of course, there is the option for going extremely expensive, but even that doesn't guarantee a good fit. I got really lucky getting that stuff on sale that I did when I did because normally I wouldn't be caught dead in such a boring upscale store as that. My mom is the one with the expensive taste in the family and she dragged me in there. I only tried on the clothes to kill time during her window shipping and by some miracle they fit. Seeing as Bush just to took the last available miracle in getting reelected with his track record, I don't think they'll be any miracles available for my personal use for a while ;-)

And yep, allergic to plastic {latex, fiberglass}, so that shoots the other idea to hell ;-)

[quote name='rockhero']You could buy a new father.[/quote]

Not at the prices I'm willing to pay. Besides, if I wait long enough, the medical insurance will do it for me considering how they're replacing bit by bit already. I figure by the time he's 100 he'll be a completely new man ;-)

[quote name='Mookyjooky']

So just tell him you want alot of cereal....I prefer Golden Grahams[/quote]

malt-o-meal makes a great golden grahms knockoff that is better than the real thing. It's a yellow bag with a kangaroo on it usually near the ground of the aisle at the supermarket. You've got to try it :)

[quote name='Zenithian Legend']How about you invest it in an English class at your local community college... your writing hurts the horse's eyes.[/quote]

Maybe the horse needs glasses. I remember that episode where Mr. Ed wore glasses. That was cool ;-)

[quote name='dahermitt']i got it.....have him buy you a monkey!!!!!![/quote]

nah, they get mean when they get older. Didn't you hear about Michael Jackson and bubbles? One of the interviews he gave talked about how it attacked him and he had to send it away to a reserve. Although knowing we know now about him, maybe they was another reason it attacked him ;-)

[quote name='sying']

Oh on what to buy, you can bid on one of those prerelase Halo 2's. Either that or a lifetime supply of Ho-ho's (or zingers, damn I love zingers).[/quote]

Don't want Halo 2 since the first one gave me motion sickness. What's a zinger?

[quote name='bmulligan']You could buy some self respect. Or perhaps you could buy some appreciation for your father who works for your existence by putting a roof over your head and food in the refrigerator.

Your story doesn't make sense. You were suprised to see all the dry cleaning bags, yet you labled the clothes for repair beforehand? Why would you be suprised if you knew they were going in for repairs ?



IMO you sound like a spoiled brat. But I guess that IS your father's fault to begin with.[/quote]

You've obviously missed some of my previous posts about the man.

He doesn't work and hasn't for years. He's over 70 years old.

He's extraordinarily verbally abusive, at times irrational {although never held responsible for those times}, and has never taken any personal responsibility for any of the horrible things he's done or allowed done due to negligence /cowardice/just plain old-fashioned stupidity with his inherent belief that everyone is better than we are and thus everyone else has more rights to basic human rights than we do.

I'm old enough now to understand just how horrible what he chose to do and not do was, and that knowledge is killing me inside a daily basis. If I fully "appreciated" the things he's done for me over the years, I'd probably be suicidal, so I minimize contact with those kind of childhood memories.

Because I'm older now, I can minimize damage he can do on a daily basis, but it's an uphill battle as he often keeps secrets from me , only for me to find out the things he done after it's too late to do anything about them.

If anything, the fact that I still have self-respect after going through everything I have says a lot about me and very little about anyone who would call me a spoiled brat ;-)

As for my surprise at seeing the dry cleaning bags, why wouldn't I be?

There's absolutely no reason to put a repaired clothing article on hangar and stick a clear plastic bag over it. Especially considering how rumpled the clothes should've been after having been tossed around traveling back and forth. The thing about a clear plastic bag is that it is clearly visible whether or not the clothes are wrinkled -- these weren't. Even if I hadn't been told they were dry clean it was obviously clearly visible.
[quote name='tinman_licks']Well if you really don't want anything right now, why not hold onto this sympathy card for another time?

If you want something now, try asking for a party or an expense-paid for night on the town.[/quote]

My dad has round-the-clock medication going on right now, which he won't take on his own -- I have to be here to make sure he takes it. Even if I could convince someone else to stay with him, in the mess he won't let the cleanup, they wouldn't be willing to battle him like I would to make sure it actually gets taken. This is the same man who conned the nursesin the intensive care unit into giving him frosted banana cake when he was in the hospital for diabetes complications. Something makes me doubt that any of my friends would have more resistance than a bunch of professional nurses. Unless, of course, they were the naughty nurses from those porn videos doing on location shoot -- that would explain why my dad ended up with the cake that day ;-)

[quote name='Zenithian Legend'] I didn't know minx was female. I just thought... man, what the hell is wrong with this guy?[/quote]

LOL
[quote name='chosen1s']You should ask your dad to take you somewhere for the weekend and you guys could have some father-daughter time. It's obvious you're more upset with your dad's insensitivity than you are about the clothes.

Time is more valuable than anything else. Since you don't want anything tangible, get him to take you to do something you've always wanted to do and have some memories to tell your kids about some day.

More valuable than a stockpile of video games or a big-screen TV in my opinion.[/quote]



I've gotten to know him. Once upon a time there was a person in my father's body that could hold fascinating discussions about history and sciences and such.

Unfortunately, rare is the conversation that doesn't disintegrate quickly since I've reached adulthood. The usual suspects are:

"You nigger loving bitch." Usually accompanied by "you shamed me.you and that fucking sand nigger"
{references to a very nice man I was briefly engaged to when I was 23 who was so nice he had no idea why my father disliked him. My dad brings him up in conversations randomly -- usually when he's losing an argument }


"I wish I never stopped the god damn abortion" often joined by its opposite "I saved your god damned life"

"dear god Jesus Jesus Christ"

And so on......

The most innocuous conversations can set him off, and requesting he take his pills/insulin nearly always does it if I force him to take them on time. At least the videogames get me away from this for a while, and a breather until the next inevitable confrontation.

[quote name='Tromack']Ok, if there isn't anything you want, invest it. I'd suggest something simple and stable like some bonds or CD's or something along those lines. If you can't use the money now, don't waste it, because you will sure have a use for it in the future, so you might as well have more of it in the future.[/quote]

Will probably be too close to giving me cash for him. He wants to make it a " present", which to him means definitely not cash.
 
Hmm...it's not a fun idea, but you could always put the money in a bank or just hold onto it for a while. It's not like you need to spend it immediately...and if you've got it in the bank, there's that much money for the next huge sale that gets posted here. :D

I'm sure you could find a much better use for it than games, though...Donate it to a charity, possibly? Using the money to buy clothes for people who need them has a certain kind of charm...
 
[quote name='Gameboy415']DS?[/quote]

Already have one preordered :)

[quote name='guessed']

Most of her clothes are gone, I thought nudity was implied. It was certainly inferred, anyway. :wink:[/quote]

And even with what clothing I have left, remember, I'm completely naked under it ;-)

[quote name='bmulligan']Some more mature children would think of their future when presented with a sum of money such as this. But obviously daddy already has a fat wallet so you don't have to worry about that, eh?

Perhaps you could find a worthy charity to donate to? $600 would go a long way toward making some underprivlidged children have a merry christmas this year. You could feed a lot of families on Thanksgiving as well. $600 buys a LOT of turkey. You could also write it off on your taxes if you itemize. Are you old enough to do that yet ?[/quote]

I'm 28


And the reason there's money available is because my father had the house refinanced, otherwise the clothes would be a lost cause as he rarely replaces anything . However, if you're old enough, feel free to start a charity in my name. The way my father handles money it won't be long before the electricity is cut off again, and although I did bail him out the time he didn't pay for a year, I have nowhere near that amount of savings nowadays.

Have you ever personally experienced having the utilities go off? I have, many times, including this year. During this particular cut off, my mother and I had to battle with my father to get the cable shutoff because he wanted to continue to allow the bill to continue despite the factor was no electricity to utilize the cable with. He would later tell me he didn't pay the electric bill because he wanted to pay the cable bill -- which was absolutely useless without the electricity!

When living with a personality like this, who wants to maintain "a lifestyle" above all else, it's either learn to spend money when when it's there or never get to use the money at all. Any natural l inclinations I have to save have all been punished because as soon as he finds out about it he spends against it knowing I will bail him out. Or, more recently in last few years, he will load load up at the cash register and cause a scene if I don't use my bank card to pay for it.

Interesting how the only truly expensive things I own my wardrobe are destroyed and suddenly everyone assumes I'm rich. Still more interesting how everyone assumes I'm a child -- especially with my picture plastered on the boards elsewhere. Not a lot of little kids with my boobs, but apparently a lot of boobs thinking I'm a little kid -- priceless ;-)

[quote name='ZeroSupporT']This thread is turning into a snake pit, sorry about the clothes but if you have the bags, can't you go right back in there with them, I mean most places have pretty understanding people and they probably saw your clothes at some point in time, I mean I don't know anyone who has a beaded sweater. try just going back and getting stuff fixed.[/quote]


Already sent him back with some of the stuff, they claimed they just "forgot" to fix it {keep in mind one of the sweaters sent for repair had a gaping hole in the shoulder from the collar to the armpit seem, which they couldn't have possibly missed when they were putting the dry cleaning chemical they were supposed to put on it on it} they claimed not to have seen the other stuff that is missing, and I can't prove that they ever did:whistle2:(

[quote name='The Shiznit']How about feeding your dad a drano burger, becausedoesn't sound like a very nice man[/quote]

I wouldn't use deadly dangerous type stuff, but I have spiked his vitamin collection with St. John's wort before. Made for some very pleasant days, however its way too dangerous to do with him on medication heavily as he is. He wasn't on much of anything when I did and consulting the family doctor before hand like I did the last time would be impossible since the I really don't need to see him for anything.
 
Wow note to self let the wife handle all cleaning of daughters clothes. I really hope I don't get my 5 year old Poed like this someday. Now I'm not judging or anything but why are you still living at home when you are 28 minx?
 
[quote name='minx'][quote name='punqsux']wow looks like i just walked into DLF's blog :wink:

ask for a robot.[/quote]

have it....lego mindstorms...my dad destroyed the starter kit by scattering the set to the four winds ,but I managed to salvage most of it and stll have some unopened expansion packs

[quote name='hutno']Ask for his soul[/quote]

not sure he has one ;-)

[quote name='Othergods']2005 Toyota Prius?[/quote]

ewwwww!

[quote name='Ikohn4ever']ask him to buy me somethin, that would be really nice[/quote]

How about we have him buy you breast implants so you can go clothes shopping for me, and you'll try everything on to make sure it fits me ;-)

I hate clothes shopping ......

[quote name='biggestinuyashafan'] how about a car or something? a cheap little car that will probably fall apart quickly.[/quote]

Already trying to get rid of my car, and don't want another one right now.

[quote name='guessed']If there isn't anything you want, don't try to come up with something just because you can. Tell him you accept his apology, and thank him for his offer. That, or a kick ass TV (jk).[/quote]

Yeah , but being generous usually just means he gets to walk all over me yet again. Not the first time he destroyed something of mine by any means, but him offering to do something about is so rare I would hate to let the opportunity slip by that have something good come out of what so far an unredeemable disaster.

[quote name='int80h']I work as a male prostitute on the side. $150/hr. Women only.[/quote]


Somehow, I think you missed title of the site

You're supposed to have a cheap ass !

Your ass is way too expensive to be on this web site ;-)

[quote name='chickenhawk']Is he offering you the option of a cash settlement? If so, just take the money and save it. That way when you do want something, you'll be all set with the cash.[/quote]

Doesn't want to give me cash -- he wants to buy me a "present" to make up for it.

[quote name='jbroush99']Ask for 100 more wishes. When you get down to your last wish, ask for 100 more.[/quote]


But don't those things always have a way of backfiring?

I could have sworn there was a Simpson's episode this ;-)

[quote name='doubledown']How can you not replace clothes?

or

Get a Plastic Bubble since you are allergic to a LOT of things ;)[/quote]

Apparently the manufacturers have a really hard time putting certain concepts together.

For example, most clothing manufacturers believe that all women wear a b cup bra -- unless the woman in question is really fat, in which case they might make enough room in the top for a c-cup. I couldn't squeeze into a c-- cup on a bet and most women's tops are designed around bra size for fit. In other words, you cannot be thin and big busted unless you are in Al Bundy's Biggins ;-)

Another problem they have is combining colorful with tall. If you are tall you are screwed looking for fun clothes because only the junior section carries fun clothes that are occasionally cut for tall people {and these are cut so that the girls who wear them look like boys -- very scary ;-)

Of course, there is the option for going extremely expensive, but even that doesn't guarantee a good fit. I got really lucky getting that stuff on sale that I did when I did because normally I wouldn't be caught dead in such a boring upscale store as that. My mom is the one with the expensive taste in the family and she dragged me in there. I only tried on the clothes to kill time during her window shipping and by some miracle they fit. Seeing as Bush just to took the last available miracle in getting reelected with his track record, I don't think they'll be any miracles available for my personal use for a while ;-)

And yep, allergic to plastic {latex, fiberglass}, so that shoots the other idea to hell ;-)

[quote name='rockhero']You could buy a new father.[/quote]

Not at the prices I'm willing to pay. Besides, if I wait long enough, the medical insurance will do it for me considering how they're replacing bit by bit already. I figure by the time he's 100 he'll be a completely new man ;-)

[quote name='Mookyjooky']

So just tell him you want alot of cereal....I prefer Golden Grahams[/quote]

malt-o-meal makes a great golden grahms knockoff that is better than the real thing. It's a yellow bag with a kangaroo on it usually near the ground of the aisle at the supermarket. You've got to try it :)

[quote name='Zenithian Legend']How about you invest it in an English class at your local community college... your writing hurts the horse's eyes.[/quote]

Maybe the horse needs glasses. I remember that episode where Mr. Ed wore glasses. That was cool ;-)

[quote name='dahermitt']i got it.....have him buy you a monkey!!!!!![/quote]

nah, they get mean when they get older. Didn't you hear about Michael Jackson and bubbles? One of the interviews he gave talked about how it attacked him and he had to send it away to a reserve. Although knowing we know now about him, maybe they was another reason it attacked him ;-)

[quote name='sying']

Oh on what to buy, you can bid on one of those prerelase Halo 2's. Either that or a lifetime supply of Ho-ho's (or zingers, damn I love zingers).[/quote]

Don't want Halo 2 since the first one gave me motion sickness. What's a zinger?

[quote name='bmulligan']You could buy some self respect. Or perhaps you could buy some appreciation for your father who works for your existence by putting a roof over your head and food in the refrigerator.

Your story doesn't make sense. You were suprised to see all the dry cleaning bags, yet you labled the clothes for repair beforehand? Why would you be suprised if you knew they were going in for repairs ?



IMO you sound like a spoiled brat. But I guess that IS your father's fault to begin with.[/quote]

You've obviously missed some of my previous posts about the man.

He doesn't work and hasn't for years. He's over 70 years old.

He's extraordinarily verbally abusive, at times irrational {although never held responsible for those times}, and has never taken any personal responsibility for any of the horrible things he's done or allowed done due to negligence /cowardice/just plain old-fashioned stupidity with his inherent belief that everyone is better than we are and thus everyone else has more rights to basic human rights than we do.

I'm old enough now to understand just how horrible what he chose to do and not do was, and that knowledge is killing me inside a daily basis. If I fully "appreciated" the things he's done for me over the years, I'd probably be suicidal, so I minimize contact with those kind of childhood memories.

Because I'm older now, I can minimize damage he can do on a daily basis, but it's an uphill battle as he often keeps secrets from me , only for me to find out the things he done after it's too late to do anything about them.

If anything, the fact that I still have self-respect after going through everything I have says a lot about me and very little about anyone who would call me a spoiled brat ;-)

As for my surprise at seeing the dry cleaning bags, why wouldn't I be?

There's absolutely no reason to put a repaired clothing article on hangar and stick a clear plastic bag over it. Especially considering how rumpled the clothes should've been after having been tossed around traveling back and forth. The thing about a clear plastic bag is that it is clearly visible whether or not the clothes are wrinkled -- these weren't. Even if I hadn't been told they were dry clean it was obviously clearly visible.
[quote name='tinman_licks']Well if you really don't want anything right now, why not hold onto this sympathy card for another time?

If you want something now, try asking for a party or an expense-paid for night on the town.[/quote]

My dad has round-the-clock medication going on right now, which he won't take on his own -- I have to be here to make sure he takes it. Even if I could convince someone else to stay with him, in the mess he won't let the cleanup, they wouldn't be willing to battle him like I would to make sure it actually gets taken. This is the same man who conned the nursesin the intensive care unit into giving him frosted banana cake when he was in the hospital for diabetes complications. Something makes me doubt that any of my friends would have more resistance than a bunch of professional nurses. Unless, of course, they were the naughty nurses from those porn videos doing on location shoot -- that would explain why my dad ended up with the cake that day ;-)

[quote name='Zenithian Legend'] I didn't know minx was female. I just thought... man, what the hell is wrong with this guy?[/quote]

LOL
[quote name='chosen1s']You should ask your dad to take you somewhere for the weekend and you guys could have some father-daughter time. It's obvious you're more upset with your dad's insensitivity than you are about the clothes.

Time is more valuable than anything else. Since you don't want anything tangible, get him to take you to do something you've always wanted to do and have some memories to tell your kids about some day.

More valuable than a stockpile of video games or a big-screen TV in my opinion.[/quote]



I've gotten to know him. Once upon a time there was a person in my father's body that could hold fascinating discussions about history and sciences and such.

Unfortunately, rare is the conversation that doesn't disintegrate quickly since I've reached adulthood. The usual suspects are:

"You night trap loving bitch." Usually accompanied by "you shamed me.you and that shaq-fuing sand night trap"
{references to a very nice man I was briefly engaged to when I was 23 who was so nice he had no idea why my father disliked him. My dad brings him up in conversations randomly -- usually when he's losing an argument }


"I wish I never stopped the god damn abortion" often joined by its opposite "I saved your god damned life"

"dear god Jesus Jesus Christ"

And so on......

The most innocuous conversations can set him off, and requesting he take his pills/insulin nearly always does it if I force him to take them on time. At least the videogames get me away from this for a while, and a breather until the next inevitable confrontation.

[quote name='Tromack']Ok, if there isn't anything you want, invest it. I'd suggest something simple and stable like some bonds or CD's or something along those lines. If you can't use the money now, don't waste it, because you will sure have a use for it in the future, so you might as well have more of it in the future.[/quote]

Will probably be too close to giving me cash for him. He wants to make it a " present", which to him means definitely not cash.[/quote]

All I have to say is "WOH>" Keep your head up.
 
[quote name='minx']
For example, most clothing manufacturers believe that all women wear a b cup bra -- unless the woman in question is really fat, in which case they might make enough room in the top for a c-cup. I couldn't squeeze into a c-- cup on a bet and most women's tops are designed around bra size for fit. In other words, you cannot be thin and big busted unless you are in Al Bundy's Biggins ;-)[/quote]

Well, you can put them in my cupped hands.
 
[quote name='Gothic_Walrus'] Using the money to buy clothes for people who need them has a certain kind of charm...[/quote]



It would, if didn't have such traumatic memories associated with it.

People in Central Jersey, this warning is for you. Remember this name:

BUNCE

The family has one daughter, Karen, whom married a firemen. There are several sons; Roger, Joe {married to a woman named Shirley}, Johnny {married to a woman named Connie}, and Phil. The parents are Mary and Don Bunce.

When I was a small child, I didn't want to get up in the morning to go to school, so the school recommended my parents hire the agency that sent Mary to our house to get me up in the mornings. Mary told my mother she had a daughter my age named Karen, so she brought Karen over . Karen smuggled my roller skates out under her coat that first time. For the next decade my mother would relate how she saved that girl by telling her taking my skates was wrong and bringing the skates back in the house. This was the first of many thefts that would continue until I was 16 . My father had a very passive nature and still does relating to anyone not me. They soon set up a scam where he allowed them to do laundry in our house and a smuggled out nearly everything we owned in the black plastic garbage bags they took their laundry away in. when we went shopping, my mom would buy clothes for me AND KAREN. My father claims now that he didn't know he was buying all these things for her, and it's possible my mom never told him and just took the credit card from him to do it . However, Karen would often not only ask him for money and I things for her, but she would also steal from his wallet -- he knew something was going on. What it boiled down to was that if I got anything she got it and sometimes just she got it. Plus, she would get everything I got by stealing it later. Many times I would have to wear the same clothes to school two days in a row because there was nothing left. The problem was so bad one of the schools actually ordered my dad to install a lock in my bedroom door. The first night it was installed I took a shower and he unlocked it for Karen while I was in the shower. He always maintained that she claimed to have forgotten her purse inside, but even if that was true, she left with a lot more than her purse.

Lest I put all the blame on her, remember those black plastic bags that had a lot more than laundry when they left our house. My father had a good paying job back then and we had a lot of expensive electronic equipment that just walked out of the house that way, in addition to just about everything else. I would often go over to the Bunce's farmhouse and see my family things all over their house. The few times I tried to do anything about it admittedly weren't very strong efforts. My mother and I often discussed it and she would say things all along the lines of back in their country {Newfoundland}, this was just consider borrowing {even though they never gave anything back} my father would say that he needed Mary to help him with the school. despite the fact she didn't work for them, she had brainwashed him into thinking she had connections that he couldn't survive without. {Pathetically easy to do considering his own childhood abuse and my mother's mental disability that I mentioned on the boards before}

because I was raised around it, it would be years before I would understand what was going around me was wrong. They were there almost every single day and sometimes the daughter was there for weeks at a time. Making things worse was the fact she was my "friend" {that I now understand why none of my other friends wanted to be around}. Her mother and her were treated like members of our family.


When I was 16 I physically met them that the driveway telling them that no one was allowed in the house anymore because things were missing. I told them no one was casting blame, but they couldn't come in anymore.

When I was 18, Phil was shocked to learn during a brief visit that I wasn't even allowed to discuss the thefts in my own home when he came for a visit {he's one of the few honest members of that family} When he heard my father yelling at me to stop talking about it because "they could sue" he stopped my dad and pointed out that everyone knew Karen stole. It was such a relief to finally hear someone else say that.

Now keep in mind, it's been years since I had any contact with these people with two exceptions {due to my mentally disabled mother} and I certainly don't think everyone is like this or has experiences like this. And keep in mind, is obviously not enough room here to give all the details, so this is a very small sampling of the chaos this family caused mine.

But to this day, I'm very picky about who I allow inside the house. I hoard what's mine and I don't even think I'd be a collector of anything if I hadn't lived through this kind of thing. It made me very materialistic. And although I have given cash to charity many times, the very last thing I would ever do is give them clothes -- even clothes bought for the purpose.

[quote name='yellowaznboy']Hire a hitman. As in get Hitman 2 for the PS2. ;)[/quote]


Got it for free for the PC, and never opened it. Came with the p-5 virtual reality glove I got on the cheap last year :)

[quote name='jlarlee']Wow note to self let the wife handle all cleaning of daughters clothes. I really hope I don't get my 5 year old Poed like this someday. Now I'm not judging or anything but why are you still living at home when you are 28 minx?[/quote]


Well, if you ever tell your daughter she can't go to the dry cleaners with you because you just want to get away from her {in between all the other terrible things you said}, she would have every right to be -- but somehow you don't strike me as that kind of person, so don't worry about it :)

Normally I try to pick my battles, and apparently the initial dry cleaner trip was the wrong one to give up on .

And I'm still here because I'm disabled and my medical insurance is tied to my father. And even if it wasn't, the 33 thousand I had through a legal settlement involving a car, which I had originally intended to invest to support myself, he took {I only spent about 2000 on myself before he had gotten the rest}

Hell, even if I was healthy, I'd still have to be here considering how bad his health is currently. It's a horrifically codependent relationship and scares it the hell out of me that my well-being is dependent on someone so completely irresponsible and untrustworthy.

Making the situation worse is his nasty habit of taking everyone else's side but our own that I previously mentioned. He claims he does it because it's the path of least resistance and he can't take any more stress. Sometimes he says he does it because he's scared and just wants to keep to himself. This kind of thing keeps me at a kind of constant fear whenever I think about it.

The latest example comes from our neighbors who have an uncovered pool pump that has become progressively louder over the years. When first installed years ago, I could be in our backyard swing and barely notice it. This year I opened the back door to let the dogs out at 5 AM one Friday and the sound that came out of the back door blasted my ears so loudly that I had pain and mild hearing loss for several hours later. And it would be many hours before I would be able to go back to sleep due to the pain.

I demanded to call the cops immediately, as the pool problem had been ongoing problem for several years and I was tired of waiting on the neighbors to get enough money to fix it {they told my parents over a year before that they didn't have enough money to fix it and that they were really sorry -- it bothered them too supposedly} . My father insisted on talking to them personally instead once I had convinced him I would the police if nothing was done. I should have called the police.

My father, being as nonconfrontational as possible, gave the neighbors this story about how his daughter couldn't sleep at night and would they please turn off their pool at night. He emphasized that it wasn't him, so don't blame him, but his daughter couldn't sleep.

I would find out the exact contents of this conversation via a letter the wife of the family left at our house over a week later stating that if I couldn't sleep at night I see a doctor, because there was nothing wrong with their pool.

So far, I've called the police twice because the noise from their pool is in the middle of my house now . The first time was at 1:00 in the morning and the police made them turn it off. The second time was closer to one in the afternoon, and the police wouldn't help me because one of the officers claimed he had heard pools louder than that before. According to him, it didn't matter that the noise was quite audible in the middle of my house or that I could prove the level of the noise through a decibel meter. He wouldn't even consider filing a public nuisance and said that I couldn't file any kind of complaint unless it was through the police. The noise is unbearable, and although I gave up using my backyard over a year before, I can't very well give up using my house. I don't think it's unreasonable to have somewhere to live without the torturous droning of an unending noise, however, this has dragged on so long that now the neighbors are indignant at the idea that there was ever anything wrong. They maintain it was always like that, and they don't know where the complaints are coming from all of a sudden. Of course, it's not all of a sudden, but because there was so much time between complaints because of my father blocking me from complaining directly to them, they may very well believe they are right even though they're obviously wrong just by the noise level alone.


MY FATHER HAS BLOCKED EVERY SINGLE EFFORT I HAVE MADE TO RESOLVE THIS.

And there have been other serious matters he's done similar things with.

Including the aforementioned thefts, there was also identity theft where my mother's sister-in-law charged around $6000 in phone bill in my moms name. After I forced my parents to contact the police, my mother refused to sign the paperwork against her brother/sister-in-law, which gave them free rein to steal my identity. You see, they moved some of the accounts that they were forced to take out of my mother's name into my name and I wouldn't find out about it until over a year later. Once again, my father was useless and to the best of my knowledge there's close to $1000 debt in my name made by these people. I notified the utilities involved that I knew about, but they're not doing anything about it {although one did " helpfully" offered to put the account back into my mother's name since the only other name they ever had on the account}. I did everything I could, but even that wasn't enough without the cooperation of the other people in the house.

There's actually a rather long laundry list of things like this.

It's almost like we have "victim" genetically tattooed on our foreheads -- except I know better.

This is a result of living as a doormat. The result of an entire lifetime lived as a doormat never standing up to anyone or anything. More and more I find myself in this trapped as many things that need to be done need either my father's consent {as the homeowner of record} to do them or just plain need transportation {I have a car, but I can't drive}

it's all just extraordinarily stressful to the point almost nothing gets done:whistle2:(
 
1. Ask him to pay to have the neighbors pump fixed.

2. Ask him to pay for breast reduction surgery so you can find clothes that fit easier.

or hell 3. Wear the clothes that don't fit your breasts because us guys dig the hell out of that...
 
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