fatherofcaitlyn
CAGiversary!
- Feedback
- 82 (100%)
I'm not getting anywhere with my job and CCNA training feels too much like work.
I'm thinking about doing a modest change and I need random strangers to tell me how bad the idea is.
Ready?
Friday $5 Oil Change. Going door to door selling oil changes in people's driveways.
Why Friday? I only work Monday through Thursday. On Fridays, I drop my daughter off at school at 8:30AM. Then, I spend the day running errands, wasting a lot of time at kongregate or here, and avoiding studies for my CCNA.
Only $5? No. I want to charge $5 more than the cost of materials for an oil change. Wal-Mart charges over $30 for an oil change. Autozone charges around $20 for the materials. I can charge $25 and the customer doesn't have to drive 7 miles to Wal-Mart. High mileage blends or synthetics would create a wider margin.
Why Oil Change? I have modest mechanical abilities and modest tools. I can change oil on a cold engine in 15 minutes. In theory, I could do 20, take a long shower and eat lunch while Caitlyn is in school.
...
Let me try some defenses to possible criticisms.
1. You got oil in my driveway, asshole!
I'll buy a tarp, put it under rhino ramps and drive the car on top of it.
2. You damaged my car.
Two way limit of liability waiver. I can't sue for oil burns and being crushed by a random car. You can't sue if your transmission gives out, you lose money in the stock market, your house burns down, your spouse cheats on you or anything else negative or positive.
3. You'll spend all of your money in gas.
Dijkstra's algorithm, a cell phone and a spreadsheet. You call in, I open a spreadsheet and I schedule you as close to your neighbor. I live within 3 miles of at least one thousand homes and 2000 cars. I might even convince apartment complexes to let me change oil in a designated spot instead of their tenants creating hundreds of oil puddles in their parking lot. Viva the suburbs!
4. What about the waste oil?
If business is slow, Autozone takes up to 20 quarts from somebody per day, no questions asked. I'm sure Advance Auto and O'Reilly have similar policies. If business is booming, I'll get to that.
5. $5 seems like very little profit. It is. Until you consider Autozone gives a $20 gift card for every 5 purchases of $20 or more. The customer buys 5 oil changes, Autozone buys the sixth. $5 per oil change turns into $9 per oil change. That waste oil? It can be sold in bulk or burned through a heater.
Speaking of sold in bulk, how about buying in bulk? My last neighbor works for an oil bottling plant. I'm thinking I could buy the oil in bulk from her company if it was more profitable than Autozone rewards. I didn't say the customer got to keep the receipt from Autozone. I'm sure I could buy oil filters cheaper if I approached FRAM with an order of a 100 of the same oil filter.
6. This is a complete waste of your talents. Absolutely. Explaining to some jackoff for 15 minutes where the start button is on their computer screen matches me to a "T". If I get a client base of 500 cars per month, I'm spending 125 hours per month changing oil. I'd only be making $4500 in CASH per month. That's the equivalent of $54K per year if I claim everything. That extra 35 hours per month could be spent on getting a Master's Degree, rekindling my love of programming or watching young but legal women take it in the pooper.
Thoughts?
I'm thinking about doing a modest change and I need random strangers to tell me how bad the idea is.
Ready?
Friday $5 Oil Change. Going door to door selling oil changes in people's driveways.
Why Friday? I only work Monday through Thursday. On Fridays, I drop my daughter off at school at 8:30AM. Then, I spend the day running errands, wasting a lot of time at kongregate or here, and avoiding studies for my CCNA.
Only $5? No. I want to charge $5 more than the cost of materials for an oil change. Wal-Mart charges over $30 for an oil change. Autozone charges around $20 for the materials. I can charge $25 and the customer doesn't have to drive 7 miles to Wal-Mart. High mileage blends or synthetics would create a wider margin.
Why Oil Change? I have modest mechanical abilities and modest tools. I can change oil on a cold engine in 15 minutes. In theory, I could do 20, take a long shower and eat lunch while Caitlyn is in school.
...
Let me try some defenses to possible criticisms.
1. You got oil in my driveway, asshole!
I'll buy a tarp, put it under rhino ramps and drive the car on top of it.
2. You damaged my car.
Two way limit of liability waiver. I can't sue for oil burns and being crushed by a random car. You can't sue if your transmission gives out, you lose money in the stock market, your house burns down, your spouse cheats on you or anything else negative or positive.
3. You'll spend all of your money in gas.
Dijkstra's algorithm, a cell phone and a spreadsheet. You call in, I open a spreadsheet and I schedule you as close to your neighbor. I live within 3 miles of at least one thousand homes and 2000 cars. I might even convince apartment complexes to let me change oil in a designated spot instead of their tenants creating hundreds of oil puddles in their parking lot. Viva the suburbs!
4. What about the waste oil?
If business is slow, Autozone takes up to 20 quarts from somebody per day, no questions asked. I'm sure Advance Auto and O'Reilly have similar policies. If business is booming, I'll get to that.
5. $5 seems like very little profit. It is. Until you consider Autozone gives a $20 gift card for every 5 purchases of $20 or more. The customer buys 5 oil changes, Autozone buys the sixth. $5 per oil change turns into $9 per oil change. That waste oil? It can be sold in bulk or burned through a heater.
Speaking of sold in bulk, how about buying in bulk? My last neighbor works for an oil bottling plant. I'm thinking I could buy the oil in bulk from her company if it was more profitable than Autozone rewards. I didn't say the customer got to keep the receipt from Autozone. I'm sure I could buy oil filters cheaper if I approached FRAM with an order of a 100 of the same oil filter.
6. This is a complete waste of your talents. Absolutely. Explaining to some jackoff for 15 minutes where the start button is on their computer screen matches me to a "T". If I get a client base of 500 cars per month, I'm spending 125 hours per month changing oil. I'd only be making $4500 in CASH per month. That's the equivalent of $54K per year if I claim everything. That extra 35 hours per month could be spent on getting a Master's Degree, rekindling my love of programming or watching young but legal women take it in the pooper.
Thoughts?