Rock and I had this conversation on AIM a few weeks ago. I don't normally post conversation logs, but this one is just too damn good to ignore. If you don't think it's funny, then ignore it, because I don't care.
WARNING: This bitch is epic. And really long. Don't say I didn't warn you.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
l Ledhed l: i find it intensely interesting when women refer to themselves as gals or dames
l Ledhed l: it makes me want to buy a pocketwatch and a bowler hat
l Ledhed l: and take them to the races
iambrerlappin: ha, indeed
iambrerlappin: haha, races
iambrerlappin: i decided earlier today - great, sensible comedy consists of three things: exaggeration, puns, and old-tymee shit.
l Ledhed l: hahaa
l Ledhed l: its true
l Ledhed l: almost every episode of Mr. Show proves the third law
l Ledhed l: oh, automobile, automobile
l Ledhed l: baby loves that automobile
l Ledhed l: drivin it all day loooooong!
iambrerlappin: i'll reference one of my own finer moments for the first law: while eating very flavorful chocolate pancakes at a diner with friends: "it's like being kicked in the mouth by a man made of suger"
iambrerlappin: er, sugar
l Ledhed l: hahaha
iambrerlappin: man, taking broads to the races is sheer comedy right there, good stuff...i'm still thinking it over, marvelling at it's timeless reference...
l Ledhed l: haha
l Ledhed l: and then we'll ride the nickle ferry, and go to the theatre
iambrerlappin: and complain about the rising petrol prices over a phosphorus
l Ledhed l: hahahahaha
l Ledhed l: oh man
l Ledhed l: pile into our model T
l Ledhed l: with our driving gloves and goggles
l Ledhed l: and a scarf blowing in the wind
iambrerlappin:
ing background flying by....
iambrerlappin: ha, i was about to mention the scarf
l Ledhed l: pull up to a service station and wait for the attendant to come out
iambrerlappin: shake our fists at a passing autogyro
l Ledhed l: while i peruse the Daily Piper to see the latest changes in the hay and zeppelin market
l Ledhed l: im telling ya, were some funny motherers
l Ledhed l: im gonna start charging for jokes
iambrerlappin: whilst i strum my moustachioed chin in disapproval as the petrol boy spills his buckets
iambrerlappin: we are indeed
l Ledhed l: "wanna hear something funny?"
l Ledhed l: sure
l Ledhed l: "kick a buck"
l Ledhed l: haha
l Ledhed l: spills his buckets
iambrerlappin: start spanking him in public
iambrerlappin: the mayor walks by and smiles approvingly
l Ledhed l: gotta learn somehow
l Ledhed l: and, of course, the mayor is jolly and fat
l Ledhed l: santa-style
iambrerlappin: course. and possibly drunk, i haven't decided.
iambrerlappin: and we're all bouncing up and down pepetually at the knees
l Ledhed l: heh
l Ledhed l: there's grainy sepia footage of us gallavanting about town
l Ledhed l: and we look like we're moving just a bit too fast
iambrerlappin: hehehe
iambrerlappin: mad trouble parking the T outside of the bank which we proceed to rob
l Ledhed l: haha
l Ledhed l: sweet
l Ledhed l: we're outlaws all of a sudden
iambrerlappin: all the cops get caught in the door on the way out
l Ledhed l: ive noticed that your bservations were slightly more hostile
l Ledhed l: and that culminated in us robbing a bank
iambrerlappin: haha, yeah, i wanna tear that old town a new one
l Ledhed l: haha
l Ledhed l: show them what's who
iambrerlappin: everything culminates in us robbing a bank
l Ledhed l: hahah
l Ledhed l: every endeavour
iambrerlappin: sometimes it just takes moer hijinx leading up to it than other
l Ledhed l: and im the somewhat reluctant one
l Ledhed l: "no, nick, we are NOT robbing another bank"
l Ledhed l: "not happenin"
l Ledhed l: ".... oh, ok...
iambrerlappin: trying to fit my suspenders on in the morning, and i fall of out the window backwards, bounce off of an ironing board and crash through the bank window, knocking out a cop and having the gun land in my hand instead of my toothbrush
l Ledhed l: hahaha
l Ledhed l: its goddamn epic
l Ledhed l: im returning from my morning cordials
l Ledhed l: tipping my hat to passing ladies
l Ledhed l: and you crash, half naked from your morning routine, right in front of me
l Ledhed l: you have a gun in one hand, and a bag of money in the other
l Ledhed l: and im giving you the "... not again" look
iambrerlappin: "i've done it again old chap..."
l Ledhed l: you still have toothpaste on your mouth
iambrerlappin: hahaha, sweet
l Ledhed l: "quickly! jam the acceleratrix!"
l Ledhed l: "but, my hat!"
l Ledhed l: "FORGET YOUR HAT!"
iambrerlappin: we're flying along at like eighty miles an hour followed by like seventeen cops pouring out the sides of the same cars, bobbing along, and i somehow get myself caught UNDERNEATH the car
l Ledhed l: hahaha
iambrerlappin: you're firing backwards blindly
l Ledhed l: dude, i've inagination-robbed many a bank in my time
iambrerlappin: and there's money flying everywhere
l Ledhed l: but this is far and away the best
iambrerlappin: agreed
l Ledhed l: we're passing field workers
l Ledhed l: everything is completely quiet except for the police sirens
l Ledhed l: they see up pass by, firing out the windows and money pouring out the window
iambrerlappin: suddenly their field is torn to shreads by the passing cop cars and all of their clothes fly off in the wind
l Ledhed l: heh
l Ledhed l: and they just stand there, in disbelief of it all
l Ledhed l: standing next to a grazing cow
l Ledhed l: i do love avoiding the law
l Ledhed l: its america's past-time
iambrerlappin: so we come up to an 'out' bridge, and only notice at the last second so we go flying off and land on the deck of a passing ferry
l Ledhed l: heh
l Ledhed l: we cross the river on the ferry, and stop by a brothel where a woman i used to court in my younger and more vulnerable years works
l Ledhed l: she shelters us for a while so we can avoid the police
iambrerlappin: she bakes us pies and dresses us up as mimes
l Ledhed l: and her and i rekindle our relationship, but things are different now
l Ledhed l: haha
iambrerlappin: you try to explain your feelings for her as a mime
l Ledhed l: and we fall into the vaudevill circuit
iambrerlappin: uh oh
l Ledhed l: we travel the country, miming by day, bank-robbing by night
iambrerlappin: all accidentally though
l Ledhed l: of course
iambrerlappin: bi-daily accidental bank mime robbing
l Ledhed l: and you accidentally run into your old bookie, whom you owe a sizable gambling debt
l Ledhed l: and, even though we'd both like to give up the bank-robbing in favor of full-time miming, w have to get some money to clear you
l Ledhed l: " bi-daily accidental bank mime robbing": that sentence is seriously frigging profound
l Ledhed l: how often do you see this sentence
iambrerlappin: hahahahaha
l Ledhed l: ne'er before have those words been assembled so
l Ledhed l: this is a once in a lifetime moment here
iambrerlappin: so we go for the biggest accidental score of them all, levelling fort knox in a bizarre nitroglycerin explosion
l Ledhed l: hahaha
iambrerlappin: indeed it is haha
iambrerlappin: we're both coated in solid gold, and we work as superheros for a time in Industry City
l Ledhed l: oh man, we're touching base on each and every 20's era noir theme
l Ledhed l: this rules
iambrerlappin: you know it
l Ledhed l: we'll leave the superhero stuff for part 2
l Ledhed l: for now, i gotta get some slee
l Ledhed l: p
iambrerlappin: good plan
iambrerlappin: we should post the completed adventures on the boards somewhere
WARNING: This bitch is epic. And really long. Don't say I didn't warn you.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
l Ledhed l: i find it intensely interesting when women refer to themselves as gals or dames
l Ledhed l: it makes me want to buy a pocketwatch and a bowler hat
l Ledhed l: and take them to the races
iambrerlappin: ha, indeed
iambrerlappin: haha, races
iambrerlappin: i decided earlier today - great, sensible comedy consists of three things: exaggeration, puns, and old-tymee shit.
l Ledhed l: hahaa
l Ledhed l: its true
l Ledhed l: almost every episode of Mr. Show proves the third law
l Ledhed l: oh, automobile, automobile
l Ledhed l: baby loves that automobile
l Ledhed l: drivin it all day loooooong!
iambrerlappin: i'll reference one of my own finer moments for the first law: while eating very flavorful chocolate pancakes at a diner with friends: "it's like being kicked in the mouth by a man made of suger"
iambrerlappin: er, sugar
l Ledhed l: hahaha
iambrerlappin: man, taking broads to the races is sheer comedy right there, good stuff...i'm still thinking it over, marvelling at it's timeless reference...
l Ledhed l: haha
l Ledhed l: and then we'll ride the nickle ferry, and go to the theatre
iambrerlappin: and complain about the rising petrol prices over a phosphorus
l Ledhed l: hahahahaha
l Ledhed l: oh man
l Ledhed l: pile into our model T
l Ledhed l: with our driving gloves and goggles
l Ledhed l: and a scarf blowing in the wind
iambrerlappin:
ing background flying by....iambrerlappin: ha, i was about to mention the scarf
l Ledhed l: pull up to a service station and wait for the attendant to come out
iambrerlappin: shake our fists at a passing autogyro
l Ledhed l: while i peruse the Daily Piper to see the latest changes in the hay and zeppelin market
l Ledhed l: im telling ya, were some funny mother
ersl Ledhed l: im gonna start charging for jokes
iambrerlappin: whilst i strum my moustachioed chin in disapproval as the petrol boy spills his buckets
iambrerlappin: we are indeed
l Ledhed l: "wanna hear something funny?"
l Ledhed l: sure
l Ledhed l: "kick a buck"
l Ledhed l: haha
l Ledhed l: spills his buckets
iambrerlappin: start spanking him in public
iambrerlappin: the mayor walks by and smiles approvingly
l Ledhed l: gotta learn somehow
l Ledhed l: and, of course, the mayor is jolly and fat
l Ledhed l: santa-style
iambrerlappin: course. and possibly drunk, i haven't decided.
iambrerlappin: and we're all bouncing up and down pepetually at the knees
l Ledhed l: heh
l Ledhed l: there's grainy sepia footage of us gallavanting about town
l Ledhed l: and we look like we're moving just a bit too fast
iambrerlappin: hehehe
iambrerlappin: mad trouble parking the T outside of the bank which we proceed to rob
l Ledhed l: haha
l Ledhed l: sweet
l Ledhed l: we're outlaws all of a sudden
iambrerlappin: all the cops get caught in the door on the way out
l Ledhed l: ive noticed that your bservations were slightly more hostile
l Ledhed l: and that culminated in us robbing a bank
iambrerlappin: haha, yeah, i wanna tear that old town a new one
l Ledhed l: haha
l Ledhed l: show them what's who
iambrerlappin: everything culminates in us robbing a bank
l Ledhed l: hahah
l Ledhed l: every endeavour
iambrerlappin: sometimes it just takes moer hijinx leading up to it than other
l Ledhed l: and im the somewhat reluctant one
l Ledhed l: "no, nick, we are NOT robbing another bank"
l Ledhed l: "not happenin"
l Ledhed l: ".... oh, ok...
iambrerlappin: trying to fit my suspenders on in the morning, and i fall of out the window backwards, bounce off of an ironing board and crash through the bank window, knocking out a cop and having the gun land in my hand instead of my toothbrush
l Ledhed l: hahaha
l Ledhed l: its goddamn epic
l Ledhed l: im returning from my morning cordials
l Ledhed l: tipping my hat to passing ladies
l Ledhed l: and you crash, half naked from your morning routine, right in front of me
l Ledhed l: you have a gun in one hand, and a bag of money in the other
l Ledhed l: and im giving you the "... not again" look
iambrerlappin: "i've done it again old chap..."
l Ledhed l: you still have toothpaste on your mouth
iambrerlappin: hahaha, sweet
l Ledhed l: "quickly! jam the acceleratrix!"
l Ledhed l: "but, my hat!"
l Ledhed l: "FORGET YOUR HAT!"
iambrerlappin: we're flying along at like eighty miles an hour followed by like seventeen cops pouring out the sides of the same cars, bobbing along, and i somehow get myself caught UNDERNEATH the car
l Ledhed l: hahaha
iambrerlappin: you're firing backwards blindly
l Ledhed l: dude, i've inagination-robbed many a bank in my time
iambrerlappin: and there's money flying everywhere
l Ledhed l: but this is far and away the best
iambrerlappin: agreed
l Ledhed l: we're passing field workers
l Ledhed l: everything is completely quiet except for the police sirens
l Ledhed l: they see up pass by, firing out the windows and money pouring out the window
iambrerlappin: suddenly their field is torn to shreads by the passing cop cars and all of their clothes fly off in the wind
l Ledhed l: heh
l Ledhed l: and they just stand there, in disbelief of it all
l Ledhed l: standing next to a grazing cow
l Ledhed l: i do love avoiding the law
l Ledhed l: its america's past-time
iambrerlappin: so we come up to an 'out' bridge, and only notice at the last second so we go flying off and land on the deck of a passing ferry
l Ledhed l: heh
l Ledhed l: we cross the river on the ferry, and stop by a brothel where a woman i used to court in my younger and more vulnerable years works
l Ledhed l: she shelters us for a while so we can avoid the police
iambrerlappin: she bakes us pies and dresses us up as mimes
l Ledhed l: and her and i rekindle our relationship, but things are different now
l Ledhed l: haha
iambrerlappin: you try to explain your feelings for her as a mime
l Ledhed l: and we fall into the vaudevill circuit
iambrerlappin: uh oh
l Ledhed l: we travel the country, miming by day, bank-robbing by night
iambrerlappin: all accidentally though
l Ledhed l: of course
iambrerlappin: bi-daily accidental bank mime robbing
l Ledhed l: and you accidentally run into your old bookie, whom you owe a sizable gambling debt
l Ledhed l: and, even though we'd both like to give up the bank-robbing in favor of full-time miming, w have to get some money to clear you
l Ledhed l: " bi-daily accidental bank mime robbing": that sentence is seriously frigging profound
l Ledhed l: how often do you see this sentence
iambrerlappin: hahahahaha
l Ledhed l: ne'er before have those words been assembled so
l Ledhed l: this is a once in a lifetime moment here
iambrerlappin: so we go for the biggest accidental score of them all, levelling fort knox in a bizarre nitroglycerin explosion
l Ledhed l: hahaha
iambrerlappin: indeed it is haha
iambrerlappin: we're both coated in solid gold, and we work as superheros for a time in Industry City
l Ledhed l: oh man, we're touching base on each and every 20's era noir theme
l Ledhed l: this rules
iambrerlappin: you know it
l Ledhed l: we'll leave the superhero stuff for part 2
l Ledhed l: for now, i gotta get some slee
l Ledhed l: p
iambrerlappin: good plan
iambrerlappin: we should post the completed adventures on the boards somewhere
