Telemarketers are like horny robots...

thekeybladewars

thekeybladewars

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I can't beat them, so when I'm bored, I like to play with them.

Today a man called, asking for my mom. I didn't respond, and when he said, "Hello" the second time around I still didn't respond, I just started breathing heavily. It was funny, because he stayed on phone for a good while. Then I got creeped out, because he was still there... When I stopped, he finally hung up.

Today I received a phonecall from... Well I can't remember their company name, but the woman on the other end was asking for my parents. I told her that my parents were dead. She said " I apologize, thank you and have a nice day."

Which is exactly what I thought she'd say...they're no fun. :cry:
 
[quote name='thekeybladewars']Today a man called, asking for my mom. I didn't respond, and when he said, "Hello" the second time around I still didn't respond, I just started breathing heavily. It was funny, because he stayed on phone for a good while. Then I got creeped out, because he was still there... When I stopped, he finally hung up.

Today I received a phonecall from... Well I can't remember their company name, but the woman on the other end was asking for my parents. I told her that my parents were dead. She said " I apologize, thank you and have a nice day."[/quote]

Wow, you sure showed them.
 
I'm on the do not call list and still get called from time to time. When I ask who is calling so I can do the little report thing they usually just hang up and call again later :/
 
As someone who used to do academic survey calls to people-- the best people are the ones who keep you on the phone doing stupid shit like breathing heavily. Then you get to waste another 10 minutes after the call telling everyone about the weirdo you just dealt with :lol:
 
Man. Your horny robots must be malfunctioning, because mine don't act like that at all.

But then again, I did program them to kill instead of be horny.

But that's close enough. They are horny for killing.

I call it khorny.
 
btw. if you get a call from an unknown number, report it to this site:

http://whocalled.us

You can see if they've called other people, what it showed up as, and complaints about it. It's helped numerous times when the caller ID fails on the call.
 
I usually answer the phone with weird, fictional accents when telemarketers call.

Eastern-European accents are my favorite.
 
[quote name='Scorch']btw. if you get a call from an unknown number, report it to this site:

http://whocalled.us

You can see if they've called other people, what it showed up as, and complaints about it. It's helped numerous times when the caller ID fails on the call.[/quote]

oh man - ohio is on that list!
 
My phone has a voice changer function, so I stick that on, the funniest thing is where they still try and keep the conversation going.
 
I got a cell phone about a month and a half ago. I've been getting calls almost every day, not just from telemarketers, but from people looking for other people. About an hour ago I had a call that went like this:

Me : Hello?
Jackass : (in a commanding tone) Is Mr. Swanson there?
Me : Who? Mr. Swanson?
Jackass : SWANSON!!
Me : You have the wrong number, ass.
(Jackass hangs up)

Not the first time I've had a call like this. I signed up on the Do Not Call list, but it hasn't been 30 days yet.
 
I absolutely hate telemarketers. I either hang up on them instantly or say really mean things to them. I honestly hate it when they ask me how I'm doing and want to act friendly to me, because I have no interests in talking with strangers most of the time.
 
Although I moved in Feb. 2007 and received a new telephone number, I still get recorded messages from Blockbuster, legal offices, gyms, and credit organizations for the guy who had the number previously.

I am on the DNC list, but credit agencies don't care.
 
[quote name='Apossum']As someone who used to do academic survey calls to people-- the best people are the ones who keep you on the phone doing stupid shit like breathing heavily. Then you get to waste another 10 minutes after the call telling everyone about the weirdo you just dealt with :lol:[/quote]
Best people, see? I guess it's too late to include that I was also making moaning sounds, too... I'm sure he had a great time. That man loves his job more because of me.


[quote name='Magehart']o_O

Have you met the 21st century yet?[/quote]
...

I know how telemarketing works, you dolts. I Just felt like being humorous today. I was hoping it'd be a gateway of responses of what you guys say or do when they call.

Dildohs!
 
[quote name='thekeybladewars']...

I know how telemarketing works, you dolts. I Just felt like being humorous today. I was hoping it'd be a gateway of responses of what you guys say or do when they call. [/QUOTE]Your mistake was overestimating the intelligence of your average CAG. ;)


[quote name='thekeybladewars']Dildohs![/QUOTE]:lol:
 
[quote name='Scorch']Wow, you sure showed them.[/QUOTE]


well he seems very clever, who thinks of breathing as a way to "get" someone
 
[quote name='Ikohn4ever']well he seems very clever, who thinks of breathing as a way to "get" someone[/QUOTE]

OP is a chick.
 
[quote name='Ikohn4ever']well he seems very clever, who thinks of breathing as a way to "get" someone[/quote]
"I can't beat them, so when I'm bored, I like to play with them."

Never wanted to 'get' anybody... Never even mentioned 'get' anywhere in my text. "Harr harr, I'm gonna get some people today!" -mischievious snare- I'm really not after telemarketers, I swear. They are after me!!! rawr! :whistle2:x

Liquid, you are valuable to this thread.
 
[quote name='JohnnyFoxDarko']I used to be a telemarketer.[/quote]

yeah i did it before too for a few months damn depressing stuff it is but it gave me a respect for what they go through. before that though i as pretty relentless with the shit id give them depending on the mood i was in. youd all be surprised how much you could get away with and even funnier how much infor telemarketers will give you about themselves.
 
I love telemarketers. They are fun to fuck with. They don't call me, but they bug my girlfriend all the damn time. When I'm at her apt. and they call, she just hands me the phone and I get to work. The other day I pretended I was an 84 yr old man and all I wanted to talk about was my prostate to a dude trying to sell me replacement windows with built-in blinds.

I love telemarketers and the entertainment they bring to me. God bless them.
 
[quote name='thekeybladewars']"I can't beat them, so when I'm bored, I like to play with them."

Never wanted to 'get' anybody... Never even mentioned 'get' anywhere in my text. "Harr harr, I'm gonna get some people today!" -mischievious snare- I'm really not after telemarketers, I swear. They are after me!!! rawr! :whistle2:x
[/quote]
lol u sure showed tehm.
 
Heres a novel idea, how about not being a bigger dickhead than them, and just politly say, "No thank you, please take me off your list"

It's quick, its easy and gets the point across.

These people do this shit because they need the money and couldnt find a better job at the time. I used to be a telemarketer at one time, and it fucking sucked ass. I hated every moment of it.

People here trying to "get them", grow the fuck up. What the hell is wrong with you? They get paid to do this, you dont get paid to waste your time playing with a telemarketer... Either you're wasting your time, being a dick, or having the maturity of a 11 year old... either way, just let it go.

Also, Mana Knight, you sound like a real winner. :lol:
 
[quote name='lokizz']yeah i did it before too for a few months damn depressing stuff it is but it gave me a respect for what they go through. before that though i as pretty relentless with the shit id give them depending on the mood i was in. youd all be surprised how much you could get away with and even funnier how much infor telemarketers will give you about themselves.[/QUOTE]

I get what your saying here, but really, I don't care. Telemarketing is one of those markets that I wish didn't exist. I don't know anyone who ever buys from them (but people must, or they wouldn't do it). So, you're going to randomly call me, while I'm doing something else, to sell me your product. I don't care. So, if I hang up or torture you over the phone, I think that's fine.

Sure, telemarketing might suck for the employees, but it pays the bills. That's fine, but if you're going to be a jackass at your job (and you have to be to do your job even remotely well here), you get the consequences of it.

So, I just can't muster any sympathy for them.
 
Telemarketers don't call now because I got the phone under my name.. Used to just call for my mom.. but now none, feels good too.[quote name='Mookyjooky']Heres a novel idea, how about not being a bigger dickhead than them, and just politly say, "No thank you, please take me off your list"

It's quick, its easy and gets the point across.

These people do this shit because they need the money and couldnt find a better job at the time. I used to be a telemarketer at one time, and it fucking sucked ass. I hated every moment of it.

People here trying to "get them", grow the fuck up. What the hell is wrong with you? They get paid to do this, you dont get paid to waste your time playing with a telemarketer... Either you're wasting your time, being a dick, or having the maturity of a 11 year old... either way, just let it go.

Also, Mana Knight, you sound like a real winner. :lol:[/quote]

Did you not read what she said a couple of posts up?

Did you not read what you just typed?

They get paid to do this, they choose that job.. not you. Its not like the only people who get shit on over their job are telemarketers, HI.. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD. It really shouldn't matter what the fuck is said to them because at the end of the day, they're getting paid for it.
 
[quote name='lordxixor101']I get what your saying here, but really, I don't care. Telemarketing is one of those markets that I wish didn't exist. I don't know anyone who ever buys from them (but people must, or they wouldn't do it). So, you're going to randomly call me, while I'm doing something else, to sell me your product. I don't care. So, if I hang up or torture you over the phone, I think that's fine.

Sure, telemarketing might suck for the employees, but it pays the bills. That's fine, but if you're going to be a jackass at your job (and you have to be to do your job even remotely well here), you get the consequences of it.

So, I just can't muster any sympathy for them.[/quote]


eh i understand you but all im saying is that i know what its like to do it and some telemarketers have to go through hell with those kinds of jobs and when i did it it was a last resort. my boss there was a crazy bitch with a husband who abused and cheated on her so of course all her shit was put off on us and at the place i was working you had to get so many people to agree to donations for you to even get paid. some not all telemarketing jobs have quotas you have to meet to make certain levels of money and if you dont make them you run the risk of getting fired and of course being berated by a smoke drenched mummy who dressed decades younger than she was.


nobody goes into telemarketing saying yeah when i grow up i want to be a telemarketer and after 9 months of hell being one i know better what they go through. i still hate when they call me and most times i dont answer if someone calls i dont know who it is but that doesnt make it any better that they do call even when you politely tell them not to so for those who keep calling and are assholes and annoying yeah you should give them shit but i still feel bad for those doing it because its hell sometimes and sitting in those little boxes can drive you nuts.


of course the occasional meltdown of a coworker did liven things up sometimes.


so to summarize i agree with everyone who says they hate telemarketers and yet i feel bad for those who are doing it because theyre just trying to get paid. its a viscious cycle. thatd make for a cool documentary though.
 
the best way to get rid of telemarkets is only sign up for free shit/magazine with a pets name IE i use my 2 rabbits (now passed away) Abby Kenevil for everything.
SO when someone calls for abby kenevil we used to put the phone by the rabbit cage and recently tell them "she is dead and buried in the yard have a good day". Oh and put yourself on the do not call list.
 
My brother flipped out when one of those automated numbers called and asked him to call them back at number xxx. He called them back and went into beyond asshole mode. I had no idea what was going on.

Back to the real world it can be just as fun changing your voice and history on your Great Grandma, especially if she has started getting dementia.

Good links above though!
 
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