The British Bulldogs' wrestling topic

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Myke, ZL, you guys just gotta hook them with the sales pitch. Start with "for Monty Brown's debut, we'll air a vignette of him in overalls selling watermelons by the road when..."

I'd go on, but they'd offer you five years/guaranteed money before you'd finish the sentence.
 
[quote name='2Fast']Myke, ZL, you guys just gotta hook them with the sales pitch. Start with "for Monty Brown's debut, we'll air a vignette of him in overalls selling watermelons by the road when..."

I'd go on, but they'd offer you five years/guaranteed money before you'd finish the sentence.[/QUOTE]

:rofl:

It's like that Bill Hicks bit from "Rant in E-Minor," where he discusses his sales pitch for the show "Let's Hunt and Kill Billy Ray Cyrus."

TV Exec: Will there be tittie?
BH: Uh...yeah, I guess
*BOOM* A check falls in my lap!
TV Exec: And what are these titties gonna do?
BH: I don't know...jiggle?
*BOOM* Another check falls in my lap.
TV Exec: Jigglin' titties...this man's a fuckin' genius.
 
[quote name='mykevermin']On an unrelated note: http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xsk17_sarah-undertakers-wife-vs-ddp[/quote]

Man that brings back some memories...

First, how DDP jobbed so badly in his series of 'matches' to Taker, that even Taker's wife got a pinfall victory over DDP.

Second, how much I hate Limp Bizket.

I wish DDP would've nailed Taker with a diamond cutter out of that chokeslame, it would've been amazing, then chased off Taker's wife as she would certainly flee without the aid of her husband, and then I don't know... finally kidnapped her?

Something like that might've made the Taker/DDP feud actually mean something instead of being another WCW guy getting buried by one of WWE's most faithful.
 
[quote name='2Fast']Myke, ZL, you guys just gotta hook them with the sales pitch. Start with "for Monty Brown's debut, we'll air a vignette of him in overalls selling watermelons by the road when..."

I'd go on, but they'd offer you five years/guaranteed money before you'd finish the sentence.[/quote]

We'll give him this gimmick:

greenmile2.gif
 
[quote name='Zenithian Legend']We'll give him this gimmick:

greenmile2.gif
[/quote]

Yikes, they just re-enacted one of the execution scenes in that movie here in the great state of Florida.
 
[quote name='Zenithian Legend']We'll give him this gimmick:

greenmile2.gif
[/QUOTE]
That reminds me of Kane coming out with a bunch of guards while being chained during his initial maskless phase.
 
[quote name='JaytheGamefan']That reminds me of Kane coming out with a bunch of guards while being chained during his initial maskless phase.[/quote]

You know, it really pissed me off how they suddenly just dropped that. I think the insane lunatic Kane would've been a good gimmick to keep running. The whole un-masking of course was very strange was one show he was horribly burned and disfigured and the next "it was all in Kane's head". I think the all in Kane's head was a good way to keep the character going, but keeping him insane would've been a nice touch.

Vince could have continued to use him as a form of punishment for people like Cena. So long as they kept bringing Kane down to the ring with rent-a-cops and in shackles.

Perhaps that would've been a good way to use the Great Khali...

You know, you don't *have* to be a good wrestler to be a good entertainer, or to be successful in the WWE.
 
[quote name='Zenithian Legend']You know, it really pissed me off how they suddenly just dropped that. I think the insane lunatic Kane would've been a good gimmick to keep running. The whole un-masking of course was very strange was one show he was horribly burned and disfigured and the next "it was all in Kane's head". I think the all in Kane's head was a good way to keep the character going, but keeping him insane would've been a nice touch.[/QUOTE]

For the first three or four weeks he was unmasked, he was the best heel character they had in the last 5 years - easily - with only Lesnar coming close. Then Shane de-balled him and it went downhill...although Kane definitively winning their feud at least brought it to a logical conclusion. I wish they had changed his entrance theme when he dropped the mask (Type O Negative's Kane theme = yes), but other than that it was about a month of glorious killer heel.
 
I only recall the cheesiness of Kane shocking Shane's "lil grapefruits." I was also dismayed by how normal he looked, and the WWE's explanation (psychological trauma) wasn't flying with me. Moreover, his hair would switch from normal (bald) one week to fucking stupid (half shaved) the next.

I didn't know Type-O did a theme for Kane. Is it on one of the cds WWE put out?
 
[quote name='mykevermin']I only recall the cheesiness of Kane shocking Shane's "lil grapefruits." I was also dismayed by how normal he looked, and the WWE's explanation (psychological trauma) wasn't flying with me. Moreover, his hair would switch from normal (bald) one week to fucking stupid (half shaved) the next.

I didn't know Type-O did a theme for Kane. Is it on one of the cds WWE put out?[/quote]

I think it's on the one with The Rock and the pie on the cover.
 
[quote name='mykevermin']Hmm. And to think I still have that CD somewhere.

Tough call tonight: 3 hours of Raw or the Bengals/Colts on ESPN?

Or FFXII?[/quote]

Just watch the first half of Bengals/Colts, Rudi Johnson should have 300 yards and four TDs by then.
 
Wow...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O4ImLo6LzbQ&mode=related&search=

The quality isn't great, but you can tell Mercury got f*cked up bad.

From WWE.com:

During his match at Armageddon, Joey Mercury was rushed from the arena to a nearby hospital after one of the ladders smashed him in the face and caused his nose to pour blood.
After examination, it was announced that Mercury had suffered a broken nose, which required four stitches to the inside and 14 on the outside of the nose. According to doctors, Mercury's nasal passage is clear and he should be okay.
 
[quote name='guyver2077']maybe cena loses belt tonight...[/QUOTE]

maybe Rick Rude will do a run in and knock Cena out, causing him to lose the belt. It's as likely to happen.
 
[quote name='mykevermin']maybe Rick Rude will do a run in and knock Cena out, causing him to lose the belt. It's as likely to happen.[/quote]

LMAO:lol:
 
[quote name='mykevermin']maybe Rick Rude will do a run in and knock Cena out, causing him to lose the belt. It's as likely to happen.[/quote]

RIP Rick Rude. Maybe the Warrior will come back and do the run-in... or Rosey, it's about as f*cking logical as having Jamal dominate the WWE.
 
[quote name='Zenithian Legend']RIP Rick Rude. Maybe the Warrior will come back and do the run-in... or Rosey, it's about as f*cking logical as having Jamal dominate the WWE.[/QUOTE]

He could be a

Samoan
Bulldozer
In
Training

Hmm...that doesn't quite work out, does it?
 
If Vince and writers were REALLY smart, they would use this rumble to take the opp. to turn someone into a main eventer.

They don't have to BEAT Cena, but make it so that whoever loses holds a grudge and it starts a new feud. This way you've also got a fresh face going for the belt.

Vince will probably waste this opp. on a loser who just gets squashed, though.

I say take the opp. to move someone like Carlito or Jeff Hardy (ha, yea right!) into the big time.
 
[quote name='Roufuss']If Vince and writers were REALLY smart, they would use this rumble to take the opp. to turn someone into a main eventer.

They don't have to BEAT Cena, but make it so that whoever loses holds a grudge and it starts a new feud. This way you've also got a fresh face going for the belt.

Vince will probably waste this opp. on a loser who just gets squashed, though.

I say take the opp. to move someone like Carlito or Jeff Hardy (ha, yea right!) into the big time.[/QUOTE]

$5 sez the H's wins it.
 
[quote name='mykevermin']$5 sez the H's wins it.[/QUOTE]

I'm going for Umaga winning it... either that, or someone who is a shocker so we can all say "OMG I can't believe Viscera won!!!" and then Cena squashes him and that's the end of that.
 
Kenny probably will win it... Vince is just that dumb. I'd love to see Jeff win it, and maybe now that the MNM/Hardyz saga is over for at least 2 months, Jeff will continue to get his singles push.

With the majority of Hardy's and Cena's fanbase being female, it'd be interesting to see the crowd reaction during that match. Although, I've noticed more and more male Jeff fans since his return. I myself have been a long-term Hardy mark, and I'm not ashamed of that, dammit.
 
[quote name='Zenithian Legend']Kenny probably will win it... Vince is just that dumb. I'd love to see Jeff win it, and maybe now that the MNM/Hardyz saga is over for at least 2 months, Jeff will continue to get his singles push.

With the majority of Hardy's and Cena's fanbase being female, it'd be interesting to see the crowd reaction during that match. Although, I've noticed more and more male Jeff fans since his return. I myself have been a long-term Hardy mark, and I'm not ashamed of that, dammit.[/QUOTE]

I'd love to see Jeff get the push and a Cena / Jeff Hardy feud going... their gimmicks alone just clash from the get go. I would start watching RAW again if such a feud started.
 
So there's a Battle Royal tonight huh? Looks like I'll be downloading it... too many finals... too little time. Also, gonna check out the PPV later, looks good. You know what move I wanna see? In Tony Hawk I think it's called a Misty Flip.. Basically think of a diagnal rotation instead of a verticle one... into a leg drop... That would be cool I think...
 
[quote name='Roufuss']I'd love to see Jeff get the push and a Cena / Jeff Hardy feud going... their gimmicks alone just clash from the get go. I would start watching RAW again if such a feud started.[/quote]

I know Cena/Umaga would also be something new, but as you pointed out Jeff and Cena's styles clash so brilliantly, while Cena and Umaga pretty much have the same style. Cena & Umaga each use the same 5 power moves or so, and then Cena does the shuffle, Umaga does the ass-ram. Cena does a fireman's carry drop, and Umaga does the Samoan drop, basically another version of a fireman's carry drop. The only difference is Umaga has that thumb poke of doom...

Don't be too shocked if Monty Brown wins the rumble tonight, that'd be a decent way to have him debut. Plus you can have Brown get in the match with Cena & Umaga at the ppv. That way Cena could pin Brown and Umaga would remain undefeated, ugh... Umaga vs Brown at WM and Cena vs Randy Orton, the probable Rumble winner. Following Mania we dip back into Cena vs Umaga, since we all want to see that so much!!!
 
[quote name='Zenithian Legend']I know Cena/Umaga would also be something new, but as you pointed out Jeff and Cena's styles clash so brilliantly, while Cena and Umaga pretty much have the same style. Cena & Umaga each use the same 5 power moves or so, and then Cena does the shuffle, Umaga does the ass-ram. Cena does a fireman's carry drop, and Umaga does the Samoan drop, basically another version of a fireman's carry drop. The only difference is Umaga has that thumb poke of doom...

Don't be too shocked if Monty Brown wins the rumble tonight, that'd be a decent way to have him debut. Plus you can have Brown get in the match with Cena & Umaga at the ppv. That way Cena could pin Brown and Umaga would remain undefeated, ugh... Umaga vs Brown at WM and Cena vs Randy Orton, the probable Rumble winner. Following Mania we dip back into Cena vs Umaga, since we all want to see that so much!!![/QUOTE]

I'd enjoy seeing Monty Brown win the rumble too BUT I think it's pushing him too much FAR too soon when there are MANY more people who deserve it more than him. Monty Brown needs to come into the IC division and work his way up - Carlito, Jeff, Nitro, even Shelton have paid their dues and need to come on up.

I'd love to see Nitro make it up too but... he reminds me WAY too much of Edge sometimes. I'd like to see Randy Orton get a title shot too.

I haven't watched RAW in forever but I'm tempted to check it out tonight, but I'm also thinking they are going to fail brilliantly. Plus, if Cena / Hardy clash, who goes heel? Jeff? Or is he even a heel already?

I really really really wish WWE would turn Cena heel already, since that would give an opp. for Carlito / Hardy to come up (both faces).
 
[quote name='Roufuss']I really really really wish WWE would turn Cena heel already, since that would give an opp. for Carlito / Hardy to come up (both faces).[/QUOTE]
The Marine isn't out on home video, yet.
 
[quote name='Roufuss']I'd enjoy seeing Monty Brown win the rumble too BUT I think it's pushing him too much FAR too soon when there are MANY more people who deserve it more than him. Monty Brown needs to come into the IC division and work his way up - Carlito, Jeff, Nitro, even Shelton have paid their dues and need to come on up.

I'd love to see Nitro make it up too but... he reminds me WAY too much of Edge sometimes. I'd like to see Randy Orton get a title shot too.

I haven't watched RAW in forever but I'm tempted to check it out tonight, but I'm also thinking they are going to fail brilliantly. Plus, if Cena / Hardy clash, who goes heel? Jeff? Or is he even a heel already?

I really really really wish WWE would turn Cena heel already, since that would give an opp. for Carlito / Hardy to come up (both faces).[/quote]

I'm very curious as to how Monty is going to be brought in. Will WWE push him like crazy to make TNA sorry they lost him, or bury him to make TNA look weak?

Right now Jeff and Cena are both face. Cena still gets boo'd in many different arenas, but he's still technically a face.

I really think Carlito needs to stay heel. He was far more over with the fans as a heel, and even if he ends up getting cheered, he can keep his heel mannerisms, as that's what got him over in the first place. Right now his gimmick seems stale and watered down as they're having him do pointless shit with Torrie.
 
[quote name='Zenithian Legend']I'm very curious as to how Monty is going to be brought in. Will WWE push him like crazy to make TNA sorry they lost him, or bury him to make TNA look weak?[/QUOTE]
Or have him "shoot" on how he left TNA.
 
Monty Brown isn't good enough in the ring or on the mic to make TNA feel sorry. His promos always made no sense and his in ring work was not good enough to warrant his placement on TNA's card.

That is just my opinion though and WWE will probably push him up the card since he fits right in to how they roll.
 
[quote name='pitfallharry219']I think it's on the one with The Rock and the pie on the cover.[/QUOTE]
The Type O song was supposed to be on Forceable Entry, but for some inexplicable reason they shitcanned it at the last minute. Ditto for a Slayer song that was supposed to be for Test (which was, ironically enough, titled "Here Comes The Pain"...this was before Lesnar's debut).

People asked Type O about it and they just said they have no control over it since WWE has the rights, so it wasn't going to be released.

Eventually they managed to release it on the UK version of "Life Is Killing Me," and you can bet your ass I imported it. Great theme. It's quite a bit different from Kane's previous three themes, which are all pretty much the same. It has the organ part at the beginning and the guitar part is just vaguely similar....it also includes this Mortal Kombat-sounding "demonic monk" bit at the beginning. It's hard to explain. It definitely would have fit that psycho heel character a lot better. I'll put it up here after I get home.
 
[quote name='CaseyRyback']Monty Brown isn't good enough in the ring or on the mic to make TNA feel sorry. His promos always made no sense and his in ring work was not good enough to warrant his placement on TNA's card.

That is just my opinion though and WWE will probably push him up the card since he fits right in to how they roll.[/quote]

Maybe he can show up as the 3rd member of Cryme Tyme! Now that is WWE-style.
 
why all the monty hate..i wanna see him debut already


Update on Joey Mercury

December 18, 2006


joey.jpg

Joey Mercury’s face, a raw, inflamed mess with blood still seeping out from his stitches, was scarlet red around his nose and left eye with hundreds of flakes of dry blood clinging to various places on his face.
“I’ve shattered my nose around the bridge area,” said a bruised and swollen Mercury, who was severely injured at last night’s Armageddon pay-per-view in a Ladder Match. “I have four fractures on the inside of my nose; I have 5 stitches on the inside of my nose and my cheek and 15 stitches on the outside of my nose and cheek. My left eye is swollen shut and I have continual internal bleeding from my nose and my eye.”
To Mercury’s credit, the injury that would have knocked most people out cold only left him momentarily stunned.
“I remember everything [about the incident],” he said. “I never lost consciousness and I never passed out.”
Asked what it felt like when the legs of the ladder dug into his face and ripped a gaping hole down his nose and under his eye, he thought long and hard before he spoke.

“I have nothing to compare it to; I’ve never been hit that hard in the face before,” he said as he paused. “I’d have to say it felt like a hundred-pound steel ladder connecting with my face at one-hundred miles per hour; or going head first through a windshield of a car without a seatbelt on; maybe getting hit in the face with a baseball bat swung by Sammy Sosa.”
Mercury made it clear it was the outcome of the match, not the injury, that was on his mind the day after the ghastly incident.
“Had I not been forced to leave the match due to a severe amount of blood loss, MNM would be the WWE Tag Team Champions,” he said. “Again, we made it clear that MNM is the greatest tag team in the modern era – not The Hardys
 
[quote name='CaseyRyback']Monty Brown isn't good enough in the ring or on the mic to make TNA feel sorry. His promos always made no sense and his in ring work was not good enough to warrant his placement on TNA's card.

That is just my opinion though and WWE will probably push him up the card since he fits right in to how they roll.[/QUOTE]

Butbutbut...The Serengeti!!!

I agree, but he has the two things that WWE demands of all its wrestlers: a good look/physique, and some semblance of presence. His promos, while they don't make sense, still show that he has charisma; if he gets scripted promos, perhaps he'll be quite good (save for the actual wrestling).

It makes you wonder if Vince is gay, given his propensity for bodybuilders (WBF), and those wrestlers he likes to push (Cena, HHH, Masters, Batista, Lashley) versus those who don't do shit. He loves his men rock hard, indeed.

EDIT: Roufuss, I would normally agree that Umaga would win - but doesn't he already have a title shot lined up? Truth be told, it will be some top-card guy Cena will beat, like Orton or Edge.

EDIT2: Looking at Mercury, I only have to say one thing, and I'll quote the great poet laureate, Ron Simmons: "DAMN!" The thing is, this is a perfect situation to use to bring back Mercury in a few months to either show him as a tough motherfucker, or to get sympathy as a babyface. It is handed down from God as a storyline, based in reality, and fans will eat it up - taking a tag team member and making his real life battles a means of motivating him in the ring.

Which means, of course, it won't be used, but barely mentioned when he comes back. Like when Kanyon almost died, and then they fired him when he came back.
 
[quote name='mykevermin']
EDIT: Roufuss, I would normally agree that Umaga would win - but doesn't he already have a title shot lined up? Truth be told, it will be some top-card guy Cena will beat, like Orton or Edge.
.[/QUOTE]

Well, like I said earlier, I haven't watched RAW in months due to having a class during its time frame, and it's not worth me DVR'ing.

Umaga can get all the title shots he wants but he's NOT title material and he will NEVER get the strap... I cannot suspend reality long enough to imagine Umaga will ever get the gold.

If it's Edge that gets the win at the rumble WWE is alot stupider than I thought. This is their one golden opportunity to push someone up higher in the card... I will be SEVERELY disappointed if they blow it.
 
[quote name='mykevermin']EDIT2: Looking at Mercury, I only have to say one thing, and I'll quote the great poet laureate, Ron Simmons: "DAMN!" The thing is, this is a perfect situation to use to bring back Mercury in a few months to either show him as a tough motherfucker, or to get sympathy as a babyface. It is handed down from God as a storyline, based in reality, and fans will eat it up - taking a tag team member and making his real life battles a means of motivating him in the ring.[/QUOTE]
Word.

I can see one great storyline from this:

Johnny Nitro deserts Mercury because of his ruined face.

Just imagine the matches that could stem from that feud, and thereafter. If done properly ( which it wouldn't :roll: ), both could walk away from the feud as straight up superstars.

Edit: Oh, and Monty Brown is as endearing as Bobby Lashley.
 
I've always kind of wondered about Vince too... he talks about how he loves "getting physical with the guys in the ring" and so on... I think he may have some bi-tendancies at the very least.
 
[quote name='Zenithian Legend']I've always kind of wondered about Vince too... he talks about how he loves "getting physical with the guys in the ring" and so on... I think he may have some bi-tendancies at the very least.[/QUOTE]
I thought that was the general consensus.

And it's no secret he has a thing for his daughter, either; prescribing to psycho-babble, and attempting to create an angle where Stephanie McMahon was pregnant with his child.
 
[quote name='Brak']I thought that was the general consensus.

And it's no secret he has a thing for his daughter, either; prescribing to psycho-babble, and attempting to create an angle where Stephanie McMahon was pregnant with his child.[/quote]

That was my favorite part on his dvd. I laughed so hard when they talked about that. This is probably why he hates the Macho Man so much.
 
The second you mentioned that I couldn't get the idea of Mach telling him off as he said he fucked his daughter.


Mach: You know Vince Steph liked having little madness in her. Oh Yea!
 
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