There's a spider inside of my Xbox controller...

evilmax17

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Alright, one of the biggest WTF moments I've had in a long while.

So I'm just lying in bed, watching TV with the lights off. Out of the corner of my eye I can see something descending from the ceiling. So I fly out of bed, turn on the light, and grab a notebook to kill this guy. I spot him on the carpet next to my Xbox controller S. A really big, creepy crawly sucker.

Before I can drop the notebook on him, he climbs into the memory slot of the controller. "Alright," I think, "I'll just wait for him to come out." So I'm sitting there waiting for this spider to come out of my controller, and he never does. So I go hunting...

I tip up the controller with the corner of my notebook to peer inside, but I can't see anything. After a few minutes I finally muster up the courage to pick up the controller and look inside. Nothing.

Now I had my eye fixed on this spider, and on the controller. I know he didn't escape, yet I can't see him. I'm amazingly confused. So I start shaking the controller...

All of a sudden, a couple spider legs poke out of one of the side holes in the memory card slot. They move around a bit, and then vanish.

There is currently a large creepy spider hiding inside my Xbox Controller S. I have it tipped upside down so that he can't escape even if he leaves the controller. Lord knows I'm not going to bed until I fish him out of there. If he's not out in like 15 minutes then I'm going to have to dismantle it.
 
Trade it in, don't look back

If you do insist on opening it up to get it out, seal the controller in a plastic bag overnight. Suffocate the fucker.
 
I'm watching him crawl around in there, from side to side. He's not making any motion to crawl back through the little holes to where I can get him. His arrogance will be his downfall...
 
[quote name='evilmax17']I'm watching him crawl around in there, from side to side. He's not making any motion to crawl back through the little holes to where I can get him. His arrogance will be his downfall...[/QUOTE]

fuck him, like I said, if you insist on keeping the controller suffocate his ass. That bastard.
 
[quote name='RedvsBlue']Trade it in, don't look back

If you do insist on opening it up to get it out, seal the controller in a plastic bag overnight. Suffocate the fucker.[/QUOTE]
That was my exact thought. Makes you think about where else spiders etc. are....places that we really don't want to know about.
 
Got him. Had to whack the controller against the carpet for awhile, but he finally came out. Bastard was bigger than a quarter.

I didn't want to risk setting the rumble off and getting spider guts all over the inside, or having it launch the spider out like a rocket (and then on to me).

That was the most bizarre videogame related moment of my life.
 
[quote name='evilmax17']Got him. Had to whack the controller against the carpet for awhile, but he finally came out. Bastard was bigger than a quarter.

I didn't want to risk setting the rumble off and getting spider guts all over the inside, or having it launch the spider out like a rocket (and then on to me).

That was the most bizarre videogame related moment of my life.[/QUOTE]

Did you kill him (or her)? I'll bet if it was a her, she already laid her eggs inside. Those fucking spiders. The only good spider is Spider-man and even he's kind of iffy right now.
 
Back in time, I had a twig inside my old-ass clear GameBoy for a long time. No idea how the shit it got in there.
 
[quote name='RedvsBlue']The only good spider is Spider-man and even he's kind of iffy right now.[/QUOTE]

You bite your tongue!!!
 
[quote name='RedvsBlue']Did you kill him (or her)? I'll bet if it was a her, she already laid her eggs inside. Those fucking spiders. The only good spider is Spider-man and even he's kind of iffy right now.[/QUOTE]
Spider-man stole some guy's pizzas!
 
[quote name='sevdustflyer']You bite your tongue!!![/QUOTE]

Mother fucker has been a punk ass bitch lately during Civil War. If he comes around and joins Captain America's team, then maybe, he'll redeem himself a little.
 
[quote name='ZeroSupporT']Quite possibly the most intriguing and odd thread I have seen this summer, possibly this year.[/QUOTE]
Oh, CAG...you never fail to impress...
 
[quote name='Stoneage']That was my exact thought. Makes you think about where else spiders etc. are....places that we really don't want to know about.[/QUOTE]


Doesn't the average person eat a couple of pounds of spiders during his/her lifetime while they sleep? I think that I read that somewhere.
 
[quote name='senorwoohoo']I was hoping for a pic, but that's probably a good thing due to my arachnophobia.[/QUOTE]
clock_legs.sized.jpg

"I'm in your house...call me."
 
[quote name='senorwoohoo']I was hoping for a pic, but that's probably a good thing due to my arachnophobia.[/quote]
Too late I'm afraid, unless you want to see a small discolored area on my carpet.
icondead.gif
 
Killing spiders inside your house is BAD LUCK!!! It's best to sweep it up in a tissue or something and release it into the wild!
 
Relax! Thats just a new feature of the Original Xbox controllers. Yeah, M$ has a backlog of those shits they have to get rid of. SO, they came up with Xbox controller S.... for Spiders! WTF you think it stood for!

Man, I remember back in the day, I was almost gonna beat Crimson Skies, when a big effin hobo spider jumped outta my memory card slot and onto my wrist and bit me. Ahh, I'll never forget THAT final boss fight.

The only reason you saw him coming down from your ceiling, was that he was probably on break and need to go eat something. He CAME back! Give your spider a break bro.
 
[quote name='niceguyshawne']Doesn't the average person eat a couple of pounds of spiders during his/her lifetime while they sleep? I think that I read that somewhere.[/QUOTE]

YMMV, I believe.
 
[quote name='niceguyshawne']Doesn't the average person eat a couple of pounds of spiders during his/her lifetime while they sleep? I think that I read that somewhere.[/QUOTE]
From what I remember reading in this it's 2-3 spiders a year.
 
[quote name='soliddragon']This is the one I used to own, I don't know bout yall. Got this shit at the Target Clearance aisle!

216018505_3570eb36e3_o.jpg
[/quote]

:applause: :rofl:
 
I had a bug under the protective screen in my TV. I thought it was part of the DVD, then I went close and noticed it. I tapped on the screen and saw it fall...burn fucker, burn.
 
[quote name='soliddragon']This is the one I used to own, I don't know bout yall. Got this shit at the Target Clearance aisle!

216018505_3570eb36e3_o.jpg
[/QUOTE]


Ladies and Gentlemen, the sequel to Snakes on a Plane!
 
[quote name='Supernothing']From what I remember reading in this it's 2-3 spiders a year.[/QUOTE]

So, over a lifetime, a couple of pounds of spider would be about right. I don't know, how much would 140 spiders (2 per year x 70 years) weigh?
 
[quote name='evilmax17']I didn't want to risk setting the rumble off and getting spider guts all over the inside, or having it launch the spider out like a rocket (and then on to me).
[/quote]

LOL!!! That made me laugh histarically for some reason.

[quote name='RedvsBlue']Trade it in, don't look back.[/quote]
That would be hilarious! Just imagine working at E/B and having some kid come in and say "This controller I bought from you has a spider in it!!!"
 
[quote name='d00k']LOL!!! That made me laugh histarically for some reason.


That would be hilarious! Just imagine working at E/B and having some kid come in and say "This controller I bought from you has a spider in it!!!"[/QUOTE]

I imagine that they wouldn't miss a beat as a spider would be rather tame compared to some of the things that they probably do get in there.
 
[quote name='Strell']We must let the GIANT ENEMY SPIDERS fight the GIANT ENEMY CRABS.[/quote]

3:1 odds on the spiders (they have venoms).:)
 
[quote name='d00k']But crabs have pinchers and being pinched hurts.[/quote]

Quite true. But the venoms eats the flesh and immobilizes it's prey...
 
[quote name='shieryda']Quite true. But the venoms eats the flesh and immobilizes it's prey...[/quote]

Yes, but crabs have thick exoskeletons that would be almost impenetrable for a spider's bite. My vote goes to the crab, probably about 50:1 odds.
 
[quote name='jeffreyjrose']Yes, but crabs have thick exoskeletons that would be almost impenetrable for a spider's bite. My vote goes to the crab, probably about 50:1 odds.[/QUOTE]

True. Plus the crabs pincers could easily snap those puny spider legs in half. I put my money on the crabs.
 
[quote name='Matrix2k3']True. Plus the crabs pincers could easily snap those puny spider legs in half. I put my money on the crabs.[/quote]

You guys are forgetting the spiders' ability to spin webs, though.
 
[quote name='shieryda']You guys are forgetting the spiders' ability to spin webs, though.[/QUOTE]

BIG MEATY CLAWS DESTROY WEBS HURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!
 
bread's done
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