Things you've heard people say in their sleep

My brother said he stayed up all through one particular night because I had in my sleep terrifyingly proclaimed:

"SATAN IS REAL!"

And no, I had never heard of the Louvin Brothers --who have a song and album by that name-- before that, nor had Dominion: Prequel to the Exorcist --in which that line is uttered-- come out yet.
 
Once when I was about ten years old I fell asleep on the couch in our living room. Apparently I used to sleep walk, and at some point in the middle of the night, I walked into my parents room and asked for medicine. I was told the conversation went like this:

Me - MOM!
Mom *startled* - What?! What is it?!
Me - Can I have some medicine?
Mom - What kind? What's wrong?
Me - I just want medicine.
Mom - Why do you need medicine?
Me - Mom I just want medicine.
Mom - You can't have any, go to sleep.
Me - But all the kids are making fun of me because I'm sleeping on the couch.
Mom - What?! Just go back to sleep.
Me - You're mean.

This one has nothing to do with sleep talking, but it's still weird as hell. There was this one time a few years ago when I woke up and for some reason my entire left leg was coverd in blood...

...I seriously have no idea what the fuck happened...

[quote name='rapsodist']My brother said he stayed up all through one particular night because I had in my sleep terrifyingly proclaimed:

"SATAN IS REAL!"[/quote]
LOL! I can just picture a terrified brother hiding under the covers for the rest of the night.
 
When I was 10 my big brother lifted up my matress as I was sleeping on it and this is how it went:

Brother: Where is it?
Me: Whoa...huh...what?
Brother: Where is it?
Me: What are you talking about?
Brother: Uh...nevermind

After that he went back to his bed and slept. I asked him about it the next morning and he didn't remember so I guess he was sleepwalking.
 
The other night I woke up to my wife laughing.

She said, "Give me five.:

For some reason I did it, and she said, "Good job."

She then went back to sleep.
 
[quote name='snotknocker']Came home one night to the babysitter asleep on the couch. She was mumbleing "Jeffery......Jeffery......Jeffery" then some silence then she blurted out "you ain't my daddy and you ain't puttin that in my ass" I waited for more but it didn't go anywhere after that
[/QUOTE]

:lol: Damn dude, that's hillarious. My college roommate last year used to go out constantly and get hammered on Everclear mixed with whatever and come back to the room and pass out drunk. His girlfriend, named Joy, had been giving him a hard time and they were in this on again, off again relationship. I was privy to this little gem as I was typing a short story for my creative writing class.

"Joy...you can really be a bitch. *silence* I'd rather fuck your mom than you. *silence* That's right, fuck your MOM! In fact I already... *silence* Don't cry, I'm sorr..." Then he proceeded to thrash around in his bed until he hit his head on the wall and knocked himself out. I'm not sure I ever want to follow up on that story.
 
My boyfriend and I got into an argument because i called him a crazy stalker psycho boyfriend in my sleep. Then i woke up and told him i didn't remember it and surely didn't mean it. We still fight about it :[
 
My mom, in a hotel room on the Cape about a week ago:

"Come on Fred [my dad], which one are you talking about? There were five balls..."

I LOL'd.
 
My bro said when we were in mexico to my cousin. Something like, "we need to buy whores and two dollar mules"

And once started rubbing my cousins arm and said, "You're my little peeacch"

Aha. My bro talks on these forums. Hes gonna kill me.
But, he is the craziest sleeper in the world... he'd always wonder into my room fall asleep on my bed, and then when I try to wake him up he'd say crazy things and just look at me with his total blood shot eyes. Creepy.

And my GF's sister ALWAYS eats invisible hamburgers in her sleep. Its so fucking annoying, if I had to hear that every night i'd kill her with a pillow. (she sleeps next to her).
 
[quote name='DarkNessBear']My bro said when we were in mexico to my cousin. Something like, "we need to buy whores and two dollar mules"

And once started rubbing my cousins arm and said, "You're my little peeacch"

Aha. My bro talks on these forums. Hes gonna kill me.
But, he is the craziest sleeper in the world... he'd always wonder into my room fall asleep on my bed, and then when I try to wake him up he'd say crazy things and just look at me with his total blood shot eyes. Creepy.

And my GF's sister ALWAYS eats invisible hamburgers in her sleep. Its so fucking annoying, if I had to hear that every night i'd kill her with a pillow. (she sleeps next to her).[/quote]

Is your GF's sister a moo cow?
 
[quote name='Paco']Is your GF's sister a moo cow?[/QUOTE]

lol!!!

I am so tempted to set up a video camera and just record what happens and what I say when I am sleeping.
 
According to Andrew, the guy I lived next door to freshman year of college, his roommate Jim spoke in his sleep all the time. One of my favorites: "You can take the juggler from the jungle, but you can't take the jungle from the juggler. Paraguay."

Also, my roommate from that year insists he heard me singing "Stacy's Mom" in my sleep. I don't believe him. :oops:
 
[quote name='Gothic Walrus']According to Andrew, the guy I lived next door to freshman year of college, his roommate Jim spoke in his sleep all the time. One of my favorites: "You can take the juggler from the jungle, but you can't take the jungle from the juggler. Paraguay."

Also, my roommate from that year insists he heard me singing "Stacy's Mom" in my sleep. I don't believe him. :oops:[/QUOTE]

how hot was stacy's mom?? was she a MILF?
 
When I was younger I spent the night at my friends and for some odd reason I awoke at 3isham. My friend (whom is asleep) asks me to stand up while I am talking to him so he can see who he is talking to (it's pitch black in the room). He then says we need to go she those crazy monkeys in the zoo sometime soon. He then said if I don't want to he will jump off of the top ropes like sting and hurt me.

I told him the next day about it and it was a inside joke for us and some of our friends for a long time. Good Stuff.
 
My son a few months ago (age 6)

"Take that, Fireboy!"

I went in to see what on earth he was talking about. Fast asleep.
 
At one of my good friend's birthday party, my friend and I drunkenly walked into his room to see my brother passed out on his bed. My brother then said what every drunken, passed out person says.. "mmmmm spaghetti!". That was it.
 
Oh man, I talk in my sleep all the time. Before I get to me though, my friends is awesome.

My friend passed out at 12am or so, and the rest of us were playing Warcraft 3. About an hour later, all I hear is "YOU HAVE TO BUILD MORE TOWERS!" he just shouted it. We all laughed and went along with our business.

I've said a few things:

me- Doom 3 RULES
 
bread's done
Back
Top