What Not to Say on a First Date

im really excited about tonight...this is my first date since i got released from prison/mental institutionabout a week ago?

and to even take that further if shes crazy enough to continue on the date with the guy


oh no its cool if i have a drink or 2 i didnt take my meds today so i dont need to worry about hem interacting with the alcohol.
 
What about: "Smell my fingers. Now which one of them smells most like your 'girl pocket?'"

Or, on the creepy side: "Is this restaurant near a grade school? I have to stay 500 yards away from those...."

I would suggest, "Man, your ass looks so awesome in those pants!" but
I said that to my wife before our first date. I guess it worked.
 
oh yeah heres another


im surprised you didnt like that my mom always told me i was an amazing kisser...even though my sister still says i need practice.
 
Don't say anything about sex period - if you can't make it happen without resorting to mind-numbingly passe first-date conversation, you don't deserve it.
 
[quote name='mykevermin']Don't say anything about sex period - if you can't make it happen without resorting to mind-numbingly passe first-date conversation, you don't deserve it.[/quote]

So, no discussion about Kama Sutra positions #32 and 66?
 
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