Worst place/time you ever got gas....you kno wat i mean!

batman2million

batman2million

CAGiversary!
Mine was during a spelling bee when I was in the 4th grade! I was in the final three and there were at least 1500 plus ppl there. It was my turn...i didn't know the word (i don't think human did) got nervous and in the silence....BOOM!....

Everyone laughed..even the teachers!
 
Oh, THAT kind of gas... I was thinking like for the car...

but anyway...

the worst time...

During a test in high school where it was so quiet, you could hear a pin drop... I had likely eaten the burrito for lunch and tried my hardest NOT to let one off... but I sneezed and I couldn't focus on the sneeze AND not farting so after the sneeze, seconds later you hear this really deafening 'Burnt!!!'... :x
 
Anyone seen the porno outtake where a man is performing cunnilingus on a woman in the doggy-style position and she rips one? It's a classic.
 
in 7th grade, I liked a girl and I finally go to talk to hear and she was really nice and seemed liked she liked me then the gas hit and lets just say we never talked much more.
 
In the library me and my friend were researching on the computers. I said something stupid and he punched which set off the fart I was holding in. There was a bunch of little six graders by us.
 
I made mine silent, so evertime there was just stink going around and people are complainin, its pretty funny.
 
well id say the best time I ever had gas was during the winter on a 3 hour car ride home with my friends after a ska show, too cold too roll down the windows, it was classic
 
sitting next to my teached in a computer lab, i started to laugh at a joke my friend jon told me and i tore one. it was sooo loud, my teacher looked at me and said "oh my god, that sick" i couldnt stop laughing its freakin hilarious
 
i was sitting on the floor at my g/f's house.
She came up to sit with me and insisted on sitting in front of me, so she makes me spread my legs and put my knees up so she can lean back against my chest and use my knees for armrests.

Well, she got what she asked for. I RIPPED a HUGE fart about 3 minutes later.
 
I was leaning over the edge of a couch when my younger sister walked over, put her ass on my head, and let'er rip. My mother and father fell out of their chairs laughing. All those years of my gassy torture came back to haunt me in that one single instance.
 
[quote name='daphatty']I was leaning over the edge of a couch when my younger sister walked over, put her ass on my head, and let'er rip. My mother and father fell out of their chairs laughing. All those years of my gassy torture came back to haunt me in that one single instance.[/quote]

LMFAO. Wow, years of karma unleashed in one gassy flash.

A buddy of mine was playing GT2 and burped in my face, causing me to lose the race (It was in Laguna Seca, i remeber). Well, as revenge, i woke up earlier than he did, dropped trou, and unleashed a bare-ass fart right into his sleeping face.

More funny than embarissing, but still worthy of mention.
 
I never get gas at a bad time, but the greatest fart I ever had was when I was sleeping over at a friend's house with a couple of friends. We were playing games in front of the TV (probably Goldeneye), all lying down on our stomachs. I let one rip, and as it slowly moved across the lying people (I was at the end), everybody smelled the worst fart ever...

Anyways, my friend always gets really bad gas and in his Stats class, he kept farting and making the girl next to him gag...
 
There's a guy at work who is very liberal about his gas. He'll even lean into a fart with no regard for the other people around. Nasty.
 
Well, one time in school my freind was sitting on the floor and I felt a huge fart building up so I started walking towards the door but at the last second stepped in front of him, butt at nose level, and let loose a fart that smelled so bad I couldn't even stand it.
 
in 5th grade, this russian kid in my class farted ridiculously loudly, it was like an earthquake. it had tons of ripples after the first one, and i swear all of us instead of laughing immaturely, we were just standing there in incredible awe, that something that incredibly loud and repulsive can come out of someone's ass, and then the worst part followed. this not only was the loudest fart, but it was also the worst smelling fart ever honestly!!! :shock: when it started smelling, two of thie girls in class started breaking out in tears, we had to cut class short, everyone was like screaming , it was histerical, the greatest day ever. it was like the morning, and we couldnt go back in the classroom the rest of the day. the kid that farted switched schools for middle school
 
eh well it was not me
My Friend Piggy aka John was in social Studies Class and we had this really dumb teacher named Mr. Wheeler and we were makin some board game about the indians of the past. Piggy Lifted up his leg and farted everyone was laughing except Mr. Wheeler.

He was like bwah blah blah You Get A detention sonny mr.Wheelers face was all angry and stuff

im like wow dude
 
I let a wet slappy fart during sex, and it smelled terrible. But she was a trooper.

One time however my mom farted so loud i heard it from upstairs on the other side of the house.

Anybody here ever sharted?
 
[quote name='Smell']eh well it was not me
My Friend Piggy aka John was in social Studies Class and we had this really dumb teacher named Mr. Wheeler and we were makin some board game about the indians of the past. Piggy Lifted up his leg and farted everyone was laughing except Mr. Wheeler.

He was like bwah blah blah You Get A detention sonny mr.Wheelers face was all angry and stuff

im like wow dude[/quote]

That was barely intelligible.
 
[quote name='LeviathynX']I let a wet slappy fart during sex, and it smelled terrible. But she was a trooper.

One time however my mom farted so loud i heard it from upstairs on the other side of the house.

Anybody here ever sharted?[/quote]

No. But it certainly sounds like you did! :rofl:
 
[quote name='daphatty'][quote name='Smell']eh well it was not me
My Friend Piggy aka John was in social Studies Class and we had this really dumb teacher named Mr. Wheeler and we were makin some board game about the indians of the past. Piggy Lifted up his leg and farted everyone was laughing except Mr. Wheeler.

He was like bwah blah blah You Get A detention sonny mr.Wheelers face was all angry and stuff

im like wow dude[/quote]

That was barely intelligible.[/quote]

what do you expect from a 10 year old kid?
 
[quote name='Ericnmel99'][quote name='daphatty'][quote name='Smell']eh well it was not me
My Friend Piggy aka John was in social Studies Class and we had this really dumb teacher named Mr. Wheeler and we were makin some board game about the indians of the past. Piggy Lifted up his leg and farted everyone was laughing except Mr. Wheeler.

He was like bwah blah blah You Get A detention sonny mr.Wheelers face was all angry and stuff

im like wow dude[/quote]

That was barely intelligible.[/quote]

what do you expect from a 10 year old kid?[/quote]

I wasn't keeping track on the age stats...
 
Can't say that I do.

Speaking of smell, I just remembered an experience that my mother shared with me. Many years ago my mother used to teach International Students. They were studying for some sort of English test they are required to take so they can get into Grad School. One night at the end of one of these classes her students were gathered around her desk telling jokes and such. Well one joke in particular had my mother in stiches. She laughed so hard that she farted, loudly and repeatedly. I doubt her students have forgotten the lesson they learned that evening.
 
i had to do a speach thing in church(last time i ever showed my face there) it was the hugest and longest fart i have ever let in my life, i was wearing silky boxers at the time, they got ripped, and my ass was sore as hell if i recall right my ass was bleeding

this fart sounded like thunder, im serious
 
I wasn't the one who farted, but once everyone was practicing wrestling in my gym class. This kid gets body slammed and let's out the loudest fart I've ever heard. The gym teacher explained that this was a very natural.
 
[quote name='ayolykewhoa']I wasn't the one who farted, but once everyone was practicing wrestling in my gym class. This kid gets body slammed and let's out the loudest fart I've ever heard. The gym teacher explained that this was a very natural.[/quote]

A body slam.. you were practicing pro-wrestling in gym class?
 
I have been party to a couple of farting incidents.

When I was in Junior High we took a bus from Texas to New Mexico for a ski-trip. You know Junior High, as soon as you get away from the parents you eat everything you can get your hands on. I ate a ton of Doritos and junk food (Dorito's do it to me, I don't know why). Later that night while people were trying to sleep on the miserable busride it hit so hard I woke up and let several SBD's go every 15 minutes or so. I was on the floor trying to sleep (we were crammed) and you know that stink rises when it's bad. This was so foul I was smelling it down on the floor. The last thing I heard before going back to sleep was "Who keeps doing that?!?" followed by much groaning.

I was too afraid at the time to see the humor (lots of high schoolers and girls on the trip) but now I find it pretty funny.
 
My other incident occurred in Physics in High School. I let a couple of really smelly ones go - the kind that are so bad if you left the room for 10 minutes and came back it would still smell rank in there. Having given up hope that nobody would notice, I just sat there hoping nobody would know who did it.

My teacher strolls over during his lecture wanderings and stops mid-sentence because of the smell. He looks me square in the eyes and says "Somebody needs to go to the bathroom." I did nothing of course and juse held my position but I'm sure everybody knew. Embarrasing then, funny now.
 
[quote name='Ericnmel99']You dont remember smells old signature? he may be older, but it looked he was about 10[/quote]


yes that may be true mr. Eric

i turned 15 3 days ago im just not growing im gonna be a midgit :x
 
[quote name='chosen1s']I have been party to a couple of farting incidents.

When I was in Junior High we took a bus from Texas to New Mexico for a ski-trip. You know Junior High, as soon as you get away from the parents you eat everything you can get your hands on. I ate a ton of Doritos and junk food (Dorito's do it to me, I don't know why). Later that night while people were trying to sleep on the miserable busride it hit so hard I woke up and let several SBD's go every 15 minutes or so. I was on the floor trying to sleep (we were crammed) and you know that stink rises when it's bad. This was so foul I was smelling it down on the floor. The last thing I heard before going back to sleep was "Who keeps doing that?!?" followed by much groaning.

I was too afraid at the time to see the humor (lots of high schoolers and girls on the trip) but now I find it pretty funny.[/quote]

[quote name='chosen1s']My other incident occurred in Physics in High School. I let a couple of really smelly ones go - the kind that are so bad if you left the room for 10 minutes and came back it would still smell rank in there. Having given up hope that nobody would notice, I just sat there hoping nobody would know who did it.

My teacher strolls over during his lecture wanderings and stops mid-sentence because of the smell. He looks me square in the eyes and says "Somebody needs to go to the bathroom." I did nothing of course and juse held my position but I'm sure everybody knew. Embarrasing then, funny now.[/quote]

:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

Those are great!
 
[quote name='Grave_Addiction']I'm actually fixing to let one rip right now at work. I always let one go right before someone walks over to my desk.[/quote]

work is a dangerous place. Sometimes you'll be sitting there all alone and let one rip, the next second someone will walk in the room and then your trapped. you try to fan it away with your notepad but they know....oh yes, they know.....
 
[quote name='Ericnmel99'][quote name='Grave_Addiction']I'm actually fixing to let one rip right now at work. I always let one go right before someone walks over to my desk.[/quote]

work is a dangerous place. Sometimes you'll be sitting there all alone and let one rip, the next second someone will walk in the room and then your trapped. you try to fan it away with your notepad but they know....oh yes, they know.....[/quote]

Too true. I slipped into someone's office to check my email the other day. There were not a lot of people around because it was after hours and nobody had been around this area for a good 10 minutes. I let a bad one go and thought "I should probably clear out of here".

Naturally, two girls came trooping in to do some work at the computer as I was standing up. What else can you do at that point but proudly walk out with your head held high?
 
[quote name='pimp_daddy_smurf']i had to do a speach thing in church(last time i ever showed my face there) it was the hugest and longest fart i have ever let in my life, i was wearing silky boxers at the time, they got ripped, and my ass was sore as hell if i recall right my ass was bleeding[/quote]


:shock: :shock: :shock:

In sixth grade or something, I was doing situps and let one rip. No one knew.
 
[quote name='chosen1s']
Too true. I slipped into someone's office to check my email the other day. There were not a lot of people around because it was after hours and nobody had been around this area for a good 10 minutes. I let a bad one go and thought "I should probably clear out of here".

Naturally, two girls came trooping in to do some work at the computer as I was standing up. What else can you do at that point but proudly walk out with your head held high?[/quote]

NICE!
 
[quote name='pimp_daddy_smurf']i had to do a speach thing in church(last time i ever showed my face there) it was the hugest and longest fart i have ever let in my life, i was wearing silky boxers at the time, they got ripped, and my ass was sore as hell if i recall right my ass was bleeding

this fart sounded like thunder, im serious[/quote]

I think I might have to call shenanigans on this one.
 
The best thing that happened to me(and worst for my coworkers) was getting it at work so bad that I just kept walking around the office cropdusting people for like two hours. It was that silent but very hot gas that seemed to stick to things. Nobody could figure out who was doing it since people constantly walked around. It was better than having someone walk up to my desk of stench.
 
This was one my most embarrasing moments:

I'm at my desk at work really into whatever I'm doing - I'm staring at the computer screen, listening to music with earphones on, and totally zoned out.

This woman comes up behind me to ask me a question and I had no idea she was there. I got startled when I turned my head and saw her--I jumped back in my seat like 2 feet and a huge fart came out. People from the nearby cubes came by to see what the noise was.

She literally scared the shit out of me.
I now have one of those rear-view mirrors on my monitor to see when people are coming.
 
I was in chemistry talking to a guy that I had a crush on. he poked me in the stomach and said, "wow you have good abs." I then told him I wasn't flexing. So i flexed real hard for him, as soon as he poked my stomach i let out the loudest fart. I was so embarassed!!!!
 
I have about 2 that I can remember distinctly.

The first one when I was young and in elementary. I was in gym and everyone was doing sit-ups. Half of the class would be doing the sit-ups while the other half would be sitting on the feet. Anyways, it was my turn and I remember it building up, but let's face it, you can't hold in a fart doing something like sit-ups. When I let it ripped, it was very loud and echoed the whole gym to where you couldn't tell where it came from. The whole class seemed to stop and it was very awkward, but I don't think anybody knew it was me. Except maybe the fat girl that was sitting on my feet.

The second time was in HS when me and a buddy where in a computer class doing some work during a breaking period. I could feel a fart kind of building up inside of me, and was just going to keep it in, but the teacher got up and left. As soon as I heard the door closed I let it rip as loud as I could. My friend hunched over, and was trying to hold in his laughter. I was like wtf, and was like why are you trying to hold your laughter in (this guy normally is laughing all the time). He pointed at the computer screen, but I knew he was pointing past it. I peeked my head over all of the monitors and on the other side I saw the head of the head cheerleader working on something. It looked like she acted like nothing happend, but I knew there was no way she could have missed that. At first I was like dammit, but I thought since my buddy is one of those fat guys, she probably thought it was him.

Probably one of the craziest farts I've ever heard though goes to my brother when I was probably in 1st or 2nd grade. We were sitting at the kitchen table, and we were about to eat breakfast before we went to school. My brother farted, and it sounded like a tune from the Little Mermaid (the aw part). It lasted like 10-15 seconds. I'll never forget that fart.
 
Whoever started this thread, nice post. I never would have though farting would have spawned so many memories. I was reminded of a couple of brothers I grew up with (they were brothers, I was not related but tight with both of them).

One was a year older than me, the other was about 1.5 years younger. Obviously those two fought and wrestled all the time. The younger one developed an impenetrable defense mechanism. Any time the older one would grab him (he didn't do it on purpose) he got all worked up and would start ripping stinkers.

That just took all the fight out of the older brother most of the time and he would end up walking away with a comment about how the younger one stinks and has a screwy way of protecting himself.
 
My favorite fart memory has to go to a fart that a friend of mine did, so memorable in fact that we even nicknamed it the "Royal Rumble Fart". I think it was 1999 and me and a buddy of mine split the cost to order the WWF Royal Rumble on PPV that year. I was sitting on my bed watching the pre-show, waiting for him to show up, when I finally heard my mom greet him at the door. He came up the stairs and walked into my room, and without saying a word, sat down on my bed and ripped the loudest fart I've ever heard in my life. We both cracked up laughing, and thought it oddly appropriate that the Royal Rumble would begin with a "royal rumble".
 
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