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Dick Tracy
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If anyone laughs at that segment, they deserve to die in a fiery car accident.
Captain Lou Albano (1933-2009) memorial wrestling topic
- Thread starter neocisco
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I wasn't paying attention last week, but Cena and Orton in an Iron Man match? Jesus.
My main issue with this is that besides the fact that these two are gonna stink up the join for the umpteenth for an hour straight, that match ALWAYS follows the same formula: They both start off getting an early pinfall, but then the heel pulls ahead by a few and dominates for most of the math, and during the last 5-10 minutes the babyface manages to tie it up and someone either scores a winning pinfall in the last 5 seconds or it goes into Sudden Death when the clock runs out.
There's very few ways to change that. To WWE's credit, they haven't done this match in quite sometime, which is more than I can say for HiaC, which they discredited the hell out of.
My main issue with this is that besides the fact that these two are gonna stink up the join for the umpteenth for an hour straight, that match ALWAYS follows the same formula: They both start off getting an early pinfall, but then the heel pulls ahead by a few and dominates for most of the math, and during the last 5-10 minutes the babyface manages to tie it up and someone either scores a winning pinfall in the last 5 seconds or it goes into Sudden Death when the clock runs out.
There's very few ways to change that. To WWE's credit, they haven't done this match in quite sometime, which is more than I can say for HiaC, which they discredited the hell out of.
JaytheGamefan
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The show intro went on way too long, and I didn't like the tension they built up between Show and Jericho - too much stuff was said between them for it to not lead to an eventual break-up, but the match was a good way to show that they're still partners, but have to put that aside for the PPV. Maria's backstage deal with Legacy was great - not so much because of them, but because of her. She was fantastic - easily the best backstage interviewer they've had in forever. She looked great, had presence, delivered everything well. Just awesome. Then Jillian beat Mickie in a pleasant surprise, even if the ending was a bit scary with the powerbomb that either knocked Mickie loopy or led to her doing a great job at selling.
Melina winning the divas belt is good for her since she's now out of Maria's life and can stop acting like a total bitch. Cole reciting this long-winded motto that was credited to Melina ruled because it was so out of character and was never said before for her. The idea of a divas trade is interesting, and is a good way to freshen up acts like Beth that have done about all they can do on Raw. She really came off like a monster by intimidating Maria, and I was a bit surprised by having them repeat the deal with Santino saying he always faked with Beth.
Cena vs. Rhodes vs. DiBiase was fine, but nothing special, and I really didn't like how Orton came out, but Cena still looked back as Cody pinned Ted. They kind of went to the "feuding partners" well a bit too much here tonight - it wasn't quite Impact-level since they were A. actually partners before fighting and B. it was all set up as a competitive rivalry to some degree as opposed to having guys try to kill each other in cold blood after one disagreement, but it still bugged me.
Swagger vs. MVP was good for the three minutes it lasted - the length of this has me concerned that MVP's push is as good as dead because not only can't he beat Swagger, but he got beat clean as a sheet in next to no time. They really can't be doing that kind of thing when they need more top faces in the main event mix and he's at least someone they could throw in there and work in the role. Kofi vs. Bourne was better than MVP-Swagger, but also went about three minutes before Evan lost. Lots of fast action here and these two meshed well together, but all this made me do was get sad at seeing how poorly Bourne has been used on Raw. He was so much better off as a rising star on ECW. Now he's just a jobber to the mid-card stars - and not only the heels, but the faces as well. Hopefully Kofi's push improves since he's in the 7-man tag, which is theoretically a main event-level match on the card and it isn't just a one-night thing to give people false hope.
The divas tag was quite awful, but Maria looked great - not so much in a wrestling sense, but in a hotness sense. As a wrestler, she was awful - and that's going by Raw diva match standards, which are quite low. The main event tag wasn't much better either, but I did like DiBiase pinning Orton since they have to do something to make him seem like a big deal soon - and that could easily start things off for him.
As a whole, this wasn't a great wrestling show, but it did a fantastic job of building up the PPV. They firmly established what the Bragging Rights match is, built up almost half of its roster tonight, set up what should be a great U.S. vs. IC Champion match that thankfully wasn't just squandered on a random TV show, and put over the Iron Man match as a huge deal that WILL change careers. So in th at sense, it really worked well, but as a wrestling show...yeah, not the best.
Screens -
Quotes -
Melina winning the divas belt is good for her since she's now out of Maria's life and can stop acting like a total bitch. Cole reciting this long-winded motto that was credited to Melina ruled because it was so out of character and was never said before for her. The idea of a divas trade is interesting, and is a good way to freshen up acts like Beth that have done about all they can do on Raw. She really came off like a monster by intimidating Maria, and I was a bit surprised by having them repeat the deal with Santino saying he always faked with Beth.
Cena vs. Rhodes vs. DiBiase was fine, but nothing special, and I really didn't like how Orton came out, but Cena still looked back as Cody pinned Ted. They kind of went to the "feuding partners" well a bit too much here tonight - it wasn't quite Impact-level since they were A. actually partners before fighting and B. it was all set up as a competitive rivalry to some degree as opposed to having guys try to kill each other in cold blood after one disagreement, but it still bugged me.
Swagger vs. MVP was good for the three minutes it lasted - the length of this has me concerned that MVP's push is as good as dead because not only can't he beat Swagger, but he got beat clean as a sheet in next to no time. They really can't be doing that kind of thing when they need more top faces in the main event mix and he's at least someone they could throw in there and work in the role. Kofi vs. Bourne was better than MVP-Swagger, but also went about three minutes before Evan lost. Lots of fast action here and these two meshed well together, but all this made me do was get sad at seeing how poorly Bourne has been used on Raw. He was so much better off as a rising star on ECW. Now he's just a jobber to the mid-card stars - and not only the heels, but the faces as well. Hopefully Kofi's push improves since he's in the 7-man tag, which is theoretically a main event-level match on the card and it isn't just a one-night thing to give people false hope.
The divas tag was quite awful, but Maria looked great - not so much in a wrestling sense, but in a hotness sense. As a wrestler, she was awful - and that's going by Raw diva match standards, which are quite low. The main event tag wasn't much better either, but I did like DiBiase pinning Orton since they have to do something to make him seem like a big deal soon - and that could easily start things off for him.
As a whole, this wasn't a great wrestling show, but it did a fantastic job of building up the PPV. They firmly established what the Bragging Rights match is, built up almost half of its roster tonight, set up what should be a great U.S. vs. IC Champion match that thankfully wasn't just squandered on a random TV show, and put over the Iron Man match as a huge deal that WILL change careers. So in th at sense, it really worked well, but as a wrestling show...yeah, not the best.
Screens -
Quotes -
Jericho - For those who don’t know me - I AM CHRIS JERICHO AND I’M THE BEST IN THE WORLD. In two weeks, WWE presents Bragging Rights - an all-new concept that will pit Raw versus SmackDown to show which show is superior. As a unified tag team champion, I am able to compete on both Raw and SmackDown, but first and foremost, I am a SmackDown superstar…
O’Dell - We don’t start Raw with you - we start it with DX!
Jericho - WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE!?
O’Dell - I’m Nancy O’Dell - have a good night, okay?
(as the timekeeper does HBK’s DX stuff)Lawler - It’s a Shawn Michaels stand-in!
Cole - AND HE’S BALDING!
HHH - Gonna do things differently, it’s not a usual night…ARE YOU READY!? I SAID ARE YOU READDDYYY!? For the thousands in attendance, the millions watching at home…and for Shawn Michaels, who isn’t here. I was gonna be here with Shawn talking about how we’re gonna captain Team Raw at Bragging Rights. I can live with this and move on and do my own thing - set up the Raw team OR I CAN DO WHAT ANY TRUE FRIEND WOULD DO AND CALL MY FRIEND AT HOME AND BADGER HIM ON LIVE TV! Think we should call him? This’ll take a second - I’m not the most technically-savvy guy…speed dial HBK…and I’ll put it on speaker. (HBK’s message is his theme)
HBK - LEAVE YOUR NAME, AND A MESSAGE, AND I’LL CALL BACK AT A LATER TIME…I’M JUST A SEXY BOY….
HHH - Shawn you there?
HBK - You didn’t here the outgoing message?
HHH - Nah, we didn’t hear you singing the message.
HBK - Well, that’s really old…
HHH - I’m just here with about oh…15,000 members of the DX Army…and uh…I personally…WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU!?
HBK - My daughter got sick and I had to stay at home with her.
HHH - She all right?
HBK - I got most of the vomit out of my hair - I just put her to sleep and read her a bedtime story.
HHH - IT WOULDN’T HAPPEN TO BE FROM THE NEW UNAUTHORIZED DX BOOK, WOULD IT!?
HBK - I wouldn’t read her that thing… I mean…OF COURSE I DID! WHAT CHILD WOULDN’T WANT TO HEAR STORIES ABOUT THEIR DADDY RAMMING HEADS OF THEIR OPPONENTS UP THE BACKSIDES OF OTHERS!
HHH - I would, it’s full of great stories and GREAT PICTURES! (HHH shows a picture of HBK mooning) Okay, now we can move onto Bragging Rights in 2 weeks…(Jerishow comes out) Before you do anything, if you could just hold this book up and smile…(Jericho throws book down)
Jericho - Look at you standing out here by yourself - without your partner, the offensive line of the Steelers! Look at you! Bragging Rights is in 2 weeks and I have been named the captain of Team SD! Smack Down - a show that just celebrated its 10 year anniversary, with more combined episodes than Cheers and Seinfeld, and is obviously better because Chris Jericho is on it!
HHH - You’re right - SD is a good show. It’s a very good show with a spineless GM that does whatever Vince says…it’s a great show that features a grumpy little troll that runs his mouth… You! And features great wrestling - the type of stuff done by Khali. It’s spectacular. BUT IT’S NOWHERE NEAR IN THE LEAGUE OF RAW!
Jericho - I guess we’ll find out at Bragging Rights who has the dominant show, but WE HAVE THE DOMINANT TEAM - RUN BY A SHINING MAN LIKE ME AND NOT A PAIR OF DELINQUENTS LIKE YOU AND SHAWN MICHAELS! Even though Show is technically on the Raw roster, I want him to be on my team at Bragging Rights.
HHH - So is that how it goes? You do what he says?
Show - THAT’S NOT WHAT HE SAID!
HHH - On the Jerishow food chain - he’s on top. Since he’s the one pitching out all the ideas, which I guess makes him the pitcher while you’re the catcher!
Show - WE’RE EQUALS! If anything, I’m the one that kinda carries this team.
HHH - You carry the team?
Jericho - What did you just say?
Show - You heard me - I didn’t get pinned last week.
Jericho - Really? I wasn’t the one who was the laughing stock of Sports Center after being humiliated by Shaq!
Show - Okay - well, at least Shaq is 7 foot tall! I DIDN’T GET PUNKED OUT BY BOB BARKER!
Jericho - I TOLD YOU I’LL FIGHT BOB BARKER ANY PLACE AND YOU KNOW THAT! You also know that I’m the best in the world and I’ve proven that with you! You’re a new man - new look. Rejuvenated career - you’re no longer known as the guy who got knocked out by Mayweather!
Show - I’VE CHANGED MY MIND! I DON’T WANNA BE ON TEAM SD! I WANNA BE ON RAW!
HHH - Hold on a second, I just wanna make sure I’ve got this straight - you wanna be on Raw? AWESOME! Unfortunately, we don’t have any spaces open. But, you know…listen…I can do you a favor, I talked to our guest host and have been given the authority and can let you earn a spot on the Raw team. You just gotta win your match tonight.
Show - I’LL EARN IT!
HHH - YOUR OPPONENT TONIGHT…CHRIS JERICHO! Oh, yeah…and that match is now!
Lawler - Did you know that Show used to be the same height as Jericho?
Cole - Really?
Lawler - Yeah, when he was 2!
(after backing his ass into Jericho’s gut)Cole - SHOW USES HIS POWER!
(after Jericho fails to beat Show)Cole - JERICHO DID WHAT HE HAD TO DO! Well, DID WHAT HE TRIED TO DO!
Cody - ARE YOU SAYING I’LL BE COMPETING AGAINST TED TONIGHT!?
Maria - YEP!
(after Jillian wins with her feet on the rope, leaving Mickie’s foot to hit the rope after the fall)Cole - MICKIE HAD HER FEET ON THE ROPES!
Jillian - EVERYBODY! GRAB YOUR CAMERA! PHOTOGRAPHERS! GATHER AROUND AND TAKE A PICTURE OF ME - YOUR NEW DIVAS CHAMPIOOOONNNN! The only thing that could make this better is if I could sing my new favorite song! PAPARAZZI BY LADY GAGA!
Nancy - JILLIAN, PLEASE YOU HAVE TO STOP! My ears are hurting so badly! I made a phone call to the other GMs over the week and made a major divas trade - you’re still on Raw. The bad news is that you have to defend your divas title against Raw’s newest acquisition right now! AND SHE’S SOMEONE WHO KNOWS A THING OR TWO ABOUT THE PAPARAZZI!
Cole - MELINA! SHE’S BACK!
(after Melina wins the title)Cole - THAT MIGHT’VE BEEN THE SHORTEST TITLE REIGN IN WWE HISTORY!
Cole - MELINA’S MOTTO HAS ALWAYS BEEN “YOU KNOW WHAT YOU CAN DO UNTIL YOU TRY!” AND SHE PROVED IT TONIGHT!
Cole - LOOK WHO’S HOSTING RAW ON THE TELEVIZZLE NEXT WEEK! SNOOP DOGG! HE’S A BIG MEMBER OF THE WWE UNIVERSE!
(to Horny dressed as HBK)HHH - THAT’S GIMMICK INFRINGEMENT!
(as he super kicks a cardboard cutout of HBK)HHH - SHAWN, HE JUST SUPERKICKED YOU!
Cole - IT’S HORNMICHAELS!
Cole - FULL DETAILS OF THE DIVA TRADE ARE GONNA BE ON WWE.COM AFTER RAW!
Beth - WHAT!? I’VE BEEN TRADED TO SMACKDOWN!
Maria - I hear that people are happy to be traded off of Raw?
Beth - DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT I COULD DO TO YOU?!
Santino - BETH! EVERY TIME WE WERE INTIMATE, I FAKED EVERY ORGAMISM!
Cole - LOOKIT! LOOKIT! COVER BY DIBIASE!
Cole - Last week Jack said QUOTE - I’M A WINNER!
Cole - Swagger would love to BRAG about being on the BRAGGING RIGHTS team!
Randy - TONIGHT, I WILL NOT TEAM WITH JOHN CENA AND I WILL NOT LET NANCY O’DELL BOSS ME AROUND!
Cole - HOW PROUD WOULD KOFI BE IF HE COULD REPRESENT THIS TV SHOW AT BRAGGING RIGHTS!?
Cole - On Thursday night, the final spot in team Raw will be determined as Mark Henry faces CHRIS MASTERS! WHAT A FUN MATCH THAT’LL BE TO CALL!
(as Bourne locks in a half crab)Cole - BOURNE WITH ALMOST A HALF CRAB!
Lawler - …THAT IS A PERFECTLY-EXECUTED HALF-CRAB!
(after the SOS cradle)Lawler - I thought that was I-T - IT!
HBK - Hunter, can I get off the phone? It’s been like two hours already!
HHH - Ready for your match?
Maria - I don’t know… You only taught me two kicks and how to put you in a head scissor for 15 minutes!
Chavo - I THINK YOU AND HORNSWOGGLE ARE CONSPIRING AGAINST ME! What makes you so special that you get to pick a team? I’m better than Show, I can fly higher than Kofi - I SHOULD BE THE STUPID CAPTAIN OF THE TEAM BECAUSE I’M A GUERRERO!
HHH - Maria - 1! (she kicks Chavo low)
Maria - Sorry.
(on Maria’s movie)Cole - Serial Buddies - THE FIRST SERIAL KILLER BUDDY FILM OF ALL TIME!
Lawler - Just because you’re a WWE fan, it doesn’t qualify you to compete in the WWE!
Miz - Show some respect for the NEW UNITED STATES CHAMPION! I DON’T THINK YOU HEARD ME - THE NEW UNITED STATES CHAMPION! OH, I’m sorry, am I bragging too much? WELL GET USED TO IT! Because I’ve been informed in 2 weeks time at Bragging Rights, the U.S. Champion from Raw will face the IC Champion from SD! OH YEAH! I WILL BE TAKING ON MY FORMER TAG TEAM PARTNER, JOHN MORRISON! And as you remember, John and I were the greatest team of the 21st Century - and you may also remember that I WAS THE TALENT OF THAT TAG TEAM! And John Morrison was nothing more than a hairdo with abs! So congrats John - you’re the new Richard Simmons, and in 10 years time, while you’re wearing bedazzled tank tops and hanging out with 400 pound women, I’LL BE ON TOP OF THE HEADLINE SHOW - RAW! BECAUSE I’M THE MIZ AND I’M AWESOME!
Cole - RAW IS GONNA BE OFF THE HIZZLE NEXT WEEK!
Cole - DIBIASE PINNED ORTON!
Cole - WHO WILL BE CENA’S OPPONENT ON HIS LAST MATCH ON RAW?… HHH!
O’Dell - We don’t start Raw with you - we start it with DX!
Jericho - WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE!?
O’Dell - I’m Nancy O’Dell - have a good night, okay?
(as the timekeeper does HBK’s DX stuff)Lawler - It’s a Shawn Michaels stand-in!
Cole - AND HE’S BALDING!
HHH - Gonna do things differently, it’s not a usual night…ARE YOU READY!? I SAID ARE YOU READDDYYY!? For the thousands in attendance, the millions watching at home…and for Shawn Michaels, who isn’t here. I was gonna be here with Shawn talking about how we’re gonna captain Team Raw at Bragging Rights. I can live with this and move on and do my own thing - set up the Raw team OR I CAN DO WHAT ANY TRUE FRIEND WOULD DO AND CALL MY FRIEND AT HOME AND BADGER HIM ON LIVE TV! Think we should call him? This’ll take a second - I’m not the most technically-savvy guy…speed dial HBK…and I’ll put it on speaker. (HBK’s message is his theme)
HBK - LEAVE YOUR NAME, AND A MESSAGE, AND I’LL CALL BACK AT A LATER TIME…I’M JUST A SEXY BOY….
HHH - Shawn you there?
HBK - You didn’t here the outgoing message?
HHH - Nah, we didn’t hear you singing the message.
HBK - Well, that’s really old…
HHH - I’m just here with about oh…15,000 members of the DX Army…and uh…I personally…WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU!?
HBK - My daughter got sick and I had to stay at home with her.
HHH - She all right?
HBK - I got most of the vomit out of my hair - I just put her to sleep and read her a bedtime story.
HHH - IT WOULDN’T HAPPEN TO BE FROM THE NEW UNAUTHORIZED DX BOOK, WOULD IT!?
HBK - I wouldn’t read her that thing… I mean…OF COURSE I DID! WHAT CHILD WOULDN’T WANT TO HEAR STORIES ABOUT THEIR DADDY RAMMING HEADS OF THEIR OPPONENTS UP THE BACKSIDES OF OTHERS!
HHH - I would, it’s full of great stories and GREAT PICTURES! (HHH shows a picture of HBK mooning) Okay, now we can move onto Bragging Rights in 2 weeks…(Jerishow comes out) Before you do anything, if you could just hold this book up and smile…(Jericho throws book down)
Jericho - Look at you standing out here by yourself - without your partner, the offensive line of the Steelers! Look at you! Bragging Rights is in 2 weeks and I have been named the captain of Team SD! Smack Down - a show that just celebrated its 10 year anniversary, with more combined episodes than Cheers and Seinfeld, and is obviously better because Chris Jericho is on it!
HHH - You’re right - SD is a good show. It’s a very good show with a spineless GM that does whatever Vince says…it’s a great show that features a grumpy little troll that runs his mouth… You! And features great wrestling - the type of stuff done by Khali. It’s spectacular. BUT IT’S NOWHERE NEAR IN THE LEAGUE OF RAW!
Jericho - I guess we’ll find out at Bragging Rights who has the dominant show, but WE HAVE THE DOMINANT TEAM - RUN BY A SHINING MAN LIKE ME AND NOT A PAIR OF DELINQUENTS LIKE YOU AND SHAWN MICHAELS! Even though Show is technically on the Raw roster, I want him to be on my team at Bragging Rights.
HHH - So is that how it goes? You do what he says?
Show - THAT’S NOT WHAT HE SAID!
HHH - On the Jerishow food chain - he’s on top. Since he’s the one pitching out all the ideas, which I guess makes him the pitcher while you’re the catcher!
Show - WE’RE EQUALS! If anything, I’m the one that kinda carries this team.
HHH - You carry the team?
Jericho - What did you just say?
Show - You heard me - I didn’t get pinned last week.
Jericho - Really? I wasn’t the one who was the laughing stock of Sports Center after being humiliated by Shaq!
Show - Okay - well, at least Shaq is 7 foot tall! I DIDN’T GET PUNKED OUT BY BOB BARKER!
Jericho - I TOLD YOU I’LL FIGHT BOB BARKER ANY PLACE AND YOU KNOW THAT! You also know that I’m the best in the world and I’ve proven that with you! You’re a new man - new look. Rejuvenated career - you’re no longer known as the guy who got knocked out by Mayweather!
Show - I’VE CHANGED MY MIND! I DON’T WANNA BE ON TEAM SD! I WANNA BE ON RAW!
HHH - Hold on a second, I just wanna make sure I’ve got this straight - you wanna be on Raw? AWESOME! Unfortunately, we don’t have any spaces open. But, you know…listen…I can do you a favor, I talked to our guest host and have been given the authority and can let you earn a spot on the Raw team. You just gotta win your match tonight.
Show - I’LL EARN IT!
HHH - YOUR OPPONENT TONIGHT…CHRIS JERICHO! Oh, yeah…and that match is now!
Lawler - Did you know that Show used to be the same height as Jericho?
Cole - Really?
Lawler - Yeah, when he was 2!
(after backing his ass into Jericho’s gut)Cole - SHOW USES HIS POWER!
(after Jericho fails to beat Show)Cole - JERICHO DID WHAT HE HAD TO DO! Well, DID WHAT HE TRIED TO DO!
Cody - ARE YOU SAYING I’LL BE COMPETING AGAINST TED TONIGHT!?
Maria - YEP!
(after Jillian wins with her feet on the rope, leaving Mickie’s foot to hit the rope after the fall)Cole - MICKIE HAD HER FEET ON THE ROPES!
Jillian - EVERYBODY! GRAB YOUR CAMERA! PHOTOGRAPHERS! GATHER AROUND AND TAKE A PICTURE OF ME - YOUR NEW DIVAS CHAMPIOOOONNNN! The only thing that could make this better is if I could sing my new favorite song! PAPARAZZI BY LADY GAGA!
Nancy - JILLIAN, PLEASE YOU HAVE TO STOP! My ears are hurting so badly! I made a phone call to the other GMs over the week and made a major divas trade - you’re still on Raw. The bad news is that you have to defend your divas title against Raw’s newest acquisition right now! AND SHE’S SOMEONE WHO KNOWS A THING OR TWO ABOUT THE PAPARAZZI!
Cole - MELINA! SHE’S BACK!
(after Melina wins the title)Cole - THAT MIGHT’VE BEEN THE SHORTEST TITLE REIGN IN WWE HISTORY!
Cole - MELINA’S MOTTO HAS ALWAYS BEEN “YOU KNOW WHAT YOU CAN DO UNTIL YOU TRY!” AND SHE PROVED IT TONIGHT!
Cole - LOOK WHO’S HOSTING RAW ON THE TELEVIZZLE NEXT WEEK! SNOOP DOGG! HE’S A BIG MEMBER OF THE WWE UNIVERSE!
(to Horny dressed as HBK)HHH - THAT’S GIMMICK INFRINGEMENT!
(as he super kicks a cardboard cutout of HBK)HHH - SHAWN, HE JUST SUPERKICKED YOU!
Cole - IT’S HORNMICHAELS!
Cole - FULL DETAILS OF THE DIVA TRADE ARE GONNA BE ON WWE.COM AFTER RAW!
Beth - WHAT!? I’VE BEEN TRADED TO SMACKDOWN!
Maria - I hear that people are happy to be traded off of Raw?
Beth - DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT I COULD DO TO YOU?!
Santino - BETH! EVERY TIME WE WERE INTIMATE, I FAKED EVERY ORGAMISM!
Cole - LOOKIT! LOOKIT! COVER BY DIBIASE!
Cole - Last week Jack said QUOTE - I’M A WINNER!
Cole - Swagger would love to BRAG about being on the BRAGGING RIGHTS team!
Randy - TONIGHT, I WILL NOT TEAM WITH JOHN CENA AND I WILL NOT LET NANCY O’DELL BOSS ME AROUND!
Cole - HOW PROUD WOULD KOFI BE IF HE COULD REPRESENT THIS TV SHOW AT BRAGGING RIGHTS!?
Cole - On Thursday night, the final spot in team Raw will be determined as Mark Henry faces CHRIS MASTERS! WHAT A FUN MATCH THAT’LL BE TO CALL!
(as Bourne locks in a half crab)Cole - BOURNE WITH ALMOST A HALF CRAB!
Lawler - …THAT IS A PERFECTLY-EXECUTED HALF-CRAB!
(after the SOS cradle)Lawler - I thought that was I-T - IT!
HBK - Hunter, can I get off the phone? It’s been like two hours already!
HHH - Ready for your match?
Maria - I don’t know… You only taught me two kicks and how to put you in a head scissor for 15 minutes!
Chavo - I THINK YOU AND HORNSWOGGLE ARE CONSPIRING AGAINST ME! What makes you so special that you get to pick a team? I’m better than Show, I can fly higher than Kofi - I SHOULD BE THE STUPID CAPTAIN OF THE TEAM BECAUSE I’M A GUERRERO!
HHH - Maria - 1! (she kicks Chavo low)
Maria - Sorry.
(on Maria’s movie)Cole - Serial Buddies - THE FIRST SERIAL KILLER BUDDY FILM OF ALL TIME!
Lawler - Just because you’re a WWE fan, it doesn’t qualify you to compete in the WWE!
Miz - Show some respect for the NEW UNITED STATES CHAMPION! I DON’T THINK YOU HEARD ME - THE NEW UNITED STATES CHAMPION! OH, I’m sorry, am I bragging too much? WELL GET USED TO IT! Because I’ve been informed in 2 weeks time at Bragging Rights, the U.S. Champion from Raw will face the IC Champion from SD! OH YEAH! I WILL BE TAKING ON MY FORMER TAG TEAM PARTNER, JOHN MORRISON! And as you remember, John and I were the greatest team of the 21st Century - and you may also remember that I WAS THE TALENT OF THAT TAG TEAM! And John Morrison was nothing more than a hairdo with abs! So congrats John - you’re the new Richard Simmons, and in 10 years time, while you’re wearing bedazzled tank tops and hanging out with 400 pound women, I’LL BE ON TOP OF THE HEADLINE SHOW - RAW! BECAUSE I’M THE MIZ AND I’M AWESOME!
Cole - RAW IS GONNA BE OFF THE HIZZLE NEXT WEEK!
Cole - DIBIASE PINNED ORTON!
Cole - WHO WILL BE CENA’S OPPONENT ON HIS LAST MATCH ON RAW?… HHH!
Undertaker4eber
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Easily the best part of the night was the HHH/HBK/Hornswoggle bit.
[quote name='OnyxPrimal']I'll be checking that out on the YouTube. 
Wife and I watch Raw every Monday, but we do it mostly out of habit. That and I know something cool is going to happen as soon as I don't watch. How did you guys just break the Habit?[/QUOTE]
By realizing that nothing cool is going to happen. When was the last time time Raw grabbed you by the sack and kept you absolutely riveted? With the possible exception of Punk's first title win I can't think of anything from the last few years.
Wife and I watch Raw every Monday, but we do it mostly out of habit. That and I know something cool is going to happen as soon as I don't watch. How did you guys just break the Habit?[/QUOTE]By realizing that nothing cool is going to happen. When was the last time time Raw grabbed you by the sack and kept you absolutely riveted? With the possible exception of Punk's first title win I can't think of anything from the last few years.
mykevermin
CAGiversary!
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[quote name='neocisco']By realizing that nothing cool is going to happen. When was the last time time Raw grabbed you by the sack and kept you absolutely riveted? With the possible exception of Punk's first title win I can't think of anything from the last few years.[/QUOTE]
Monday Night Raw is straight paint-by-numbers, son.
You know this. I'm still trying to break myself of the Monday Night habit (keep in mind I've watched big-time wrestling on my tv on Monday nights since longer than some of y'all have been alive), but I did not watch at all last night and I feel really good about it. Can't wait to do it again next week in fact.
Found 2 hours of football watching time, or some precious video game playing time. But Raw's been too agonizing to enjoy, with limited exceptions, since the early Dubya Administration, let alone today. So it's time to leave it behind. I'll still follow the WWE product, but I'm not watching their programming first run anymore. Waste of my bloody time.
Monday Night Raw is straight paint-by-numbers, son.
You know this. I'm still trying to break myself of the Monday Night habit (keep in mind I've watched big-time wrestling on my tv on Monday nights since longer than some of y'all have been alive), but I did not watch at all last night and I feel really good about it. Can't wait to do it again next week in fact.
Found 2 hours of football watching time, or some precious video game playing time. But Raw's been too agonizing to enjoy, with limited exceptions, since the early Dubya Administration, let alone today. So it's time to leave it behind. I'll still follow the WWE product, but I'm not watching their programming first run anymore. Waste of my bloody time.
GuilewasNK
CAGiversary!
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I DVR'd RAW (was watching football) and watched some of it just now. Nancy O'Dell is a MILF of the highest order. Good Lord. 
Maria and Nancy were great in their roles. I was really surprised at how well they fit in. Everything was natural.
I really, reallly like Jerishow. They have really good chemistry as a team, comedy act, and everything else in between. Also, Santino faking every organism with Beth = :lol:.
I was kind of surprised Cody won the triple threat. I see Ted being the next break out star for WWE really soon.
Maria and Nancy were great in their roles. I was really surprised at how well they fit in. Everything was natural.
I really, reallly like Jerishow. They have really good chemistry as a team, comedy act, and everything else in between. Also, Santino faking every organism with Beth = :lol:.
I was kind of surprised Cody won the triple threat. I see Ted being the next break out star for WWE really soon.
[quote name='GuilewasNK']I DVR'd RAW (was watching football) and watched some of it just now. Nancy O'Dell is a MILF of the highest order. Good Lord.
I was kind of surprised Cody won the triple threat. I see Ted being the next break out star for WWE really soon.[/QUOTE]
That is why Ted is the star of the next Marine movie.
I was kind of surprised Cody won the triple threat. I see Ted being the next break out star for WWE really soon.[/QUOTE]
That is why Ted is the star of the next Marine movie.
Iron Clad Burrito
CAGiversary!
- Feedback
- 5 (100%)
[quote name='OnyxPrimal']How did you guys just break the Habit?[/QUOTE]
1. Only one in the house who watches.
2. West-Coastie, meaning I can read here first how good/bad the show is before making my decision.
3. I'd love to say "MNF" but the West-Coastie thing precludes it... I can watch it in HD at 6, or wait on the SD broadcast at 9. Football's over, or close to it, by 9.
4. I'm a jaded old fart when it comes to this stuff anyway; I think I've been watching longer than even Myke's been alive.
1. Only one in the house who watches.
2. West-Coastie, meaning I can read here first how good/bad the show is before making my decision.
3. I'd love to say "MNF" but the West-Coastie thing precludes it... I can watch it in HD at 6, or wait on the SD broadcast at 9. Football's over, or close to it, by 9.
4. I'm a jaded old fart when it comes to this stuff anyway; I think I've been watching longer than even Myke's been alive.
OnyxPrimal
CAGiversary!
- Feedback
- 10 (100%)
[quote name='GuilewasNK']I DVR'd RAW (was watching football) and watched some of it just now. Nancy O'Dell is a MILF of the highest order. Good Lord.
Maria and Nancy were great in their roles. I was really surprised at how well they fit in. Everything was natural.
I really, reallly like Jerishow. They have really good chemistry as a team, comedy act, and everything else in between. Also, Santino faking every organism with Beth = :lol:.
I was kind of surprised Cody won the triple threat. I see Ted being the next break out star for WWE really soon.[/QUOTE]
I also DVRed Raw and since I'm not in to football the wife and I just watched a movie instead. She liked that better than Raw and now I can fast forward through most of the show. I'm going to try it like this for a bit and see how it goes.
Maria and Nancy were great in their roles. I was really surprised at how well they fit in. Everything was natural.
I really, reallly like Jerishow. They have really good chemistry as a team, comedy act, and everything else in between. Also, Santino faking every organism with Beth = :lol:.
I was kind of surprised Cody won the triple threat. I see Ted being the next break out star for WWE really soon.[/QUOTE]
I also DVRed Raw and since I'm not in to football the wife and I just watched a movie instead. She liked that better than Raw and now I can fast forward through most of the show.
I'm going to try it like this for a bit and see how it goes.
[quote name='OnyxPrimal']How did you guys just break the Habit?[/QUOTE]
Not sure if you're looking to just stop watching Raw or WWE in general, but I'd say just pick a day ahead of time and stop watching. It really was that easy for me, and I know I had been watching longer than pretty much anyone here prior to that - that's how dull it has gotten. I don't think I've watched Raw more than a dozen times or so since Wrestlemania 23, and a full, beginning to end episode only once (the Punk title win episode - and that was downloaded after the fact). Day after Wrestlemania is usually a good time to stop since most of the storylines get reset.
Not sure if you're looking to just stop watching Raw or WWE in general, but I'd say just pick a day ahead of time and stop watching. It really was that easy for me, and I know I had been watching longer than pretty much anyone here prior to that - that's how dull it has gotten. I don't think I've watched Raw more than a dozen times or so since Wrestlemania 23, and a full, beginning to end episode only once (the Punk title win episode - and that was downloaded after the fact). Day after Wrestlemania is usually a good time to stop since most of the storylines get reset.
bornrunnin31
CAGiversary!
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Ted has really impressed me lately, caught his match with Evan Bourne on Superstars on Thursday and then last night. His moveset has some variety and he does a good job playing the heel, even if the crowd is rarely into his matches. I also like him and Rhodes as a team because they actually work as a team. But, with the non-existent tag division, it's basically just throw them up against whatever makeshift team of the week. If the two didn't lack so much personality they could really be going places, but the crowds just do not care because they're so plain.
S
strongpimphand
Guest
It's been near impossible for me to pay attention to Raw now...especially since I already know most of the show!
Cena and Orton, or Cena and HHH, or Cena and Orton and HHH
...That's all I need to know. I'd rather watch football!
Cena and Orton, or Cena and HHH, or Cena and Orton and HHH
...That's all I need to know. I'd rather watch football!
[quote name='mykevermin']Monday Night Raw is straight paint-by-numbers, son.
You know this. I'm still trying to break myself of the Monday Night habit (keep in mind I've watched big-time wrestling on my tv on Monday nights since longer than some of y'all have been alive), but I did not watch at all last night and I feel really good about it. Can't wait to do it again next week in fact.
Found 2 hours of football watching time, or some precious video game playing time. But Raw's been too agonizing to enjoy, with limited exceptions, since the early Dubya Administration, let alone today. So it's time to leave it behind. I'll still follow the WWE product, but I'm not watching their programming first run anymore. Waste of my bloody time.[/QUOTE]
The veil has been lifted! I felt the same way when I stopped watching almost 2 years ago, like a yoke taken off of my shoulders. Having those 2 hours freed up is liberating.
You know this. I'm still trying to break myself of the Monday Night habit (keep in mind I've watched big-time wrestling on my tv on Monday nights since longer than some of y'all have been alive), but I did not watch at all last night and I feel really good about it. Can't wait to do it again next week in fact.
Found 2 hours of football watching time, or some precious video game playing time. But Raw's been too agonizing to enjoy, with limited exceptions, since the early Dubya Administration, let alone today. So it's time to leave it behind. I'll still follow the WWE product, but I'm not watching their programming first run anymore. Waste of my bloody time.[/QUOTE]
The veil has been lifted! I felt the same way when I stopped watching almost 2 years ago, like a yoke taken off of my shoulders. Having those 2 hours freed up is liberating.
Demolition Man
CAGiversary!
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I watched the Doophins/Jests game while installing Windows 7 last night.
Now the divas reflect that Smackdown is the show with more actual wrestling on it..
To Smackdown
Beth Phoenix
Mickie James
To Raw
Eve
Bella Twins
Melina
To ECW
Rosa Mendez
I wonder why they moved Eve, she's been pretty involved with the Cryme Tyme/Hart Dynasty feud. The combination of Mickie,Beth,Michelle and Natalya should produce some decent matches.
Gail Kim is left to carry large amounts of dead weight on Raw. I was hoping Katie Lea would get moved over to another show but that'll probably only happen if Paul gets released at some point.
To Smackdown
Beth Phoenix
Mickie James
To Raw
Eve
Bella Twins
Melina
To ECW
Rosa Mendez
I wonder why they moved Eve, she's been pretty involved with the Cryme Tyme/Hart Dynasty feud. The combination of Mickie,Beth,Michelle and Natalya should produce some decent matches.
Gail Kim is left to carry large amounts of dead weight on Raw. I was hoping Katie Lea would get moved over to another show but that'll probably only happen if Paul gets released at some point.
OnyxPrimal
CAGiversary!
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- 10 (100%)
[quote name='KaneRobot']Not sure if you're looking to just stop watching Raw or WWE in general, but I'd say just pick a day ahead of time and stop watching. It really was that easy for me, and I know I had been watching longer than pretty much anyone here prior to that - that's how dull it has gotten. I don't think I've watched Raw more than a dozen times or so since Wrestlemania 23, and a full, beginning to end episode only once (the Punk title win episode - and that was downloaded after the fact). Day after Wrestlemania is usually a good time to stop since most of the storylines get reset.[/QUOTE]
I just hate wasting 2 hours on a show with little to no value to me. Nothing happens. Matches are short and rarely is anyone not in the big 4 on the show allowed to shine. It may not mean anything to the WWE that I don't watch RAW, but I can try something else to get that time back. At least I can see a decent match or two on Smackdown.
I just hate wasting 2 hours on a show with little to no value to me. Nothing happens. Matches are short and rarely is anyone not in the big 4 on the show allowed to shine. It may not mean anything to the WWE that I don't watch RAW, but I can try something else to get that time back. At least I can see a decent match or two on Smackdown.
mykevermin
CAGiversary!
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Plan ahead.
You're in WV. Go to the dog racing tracks in Nitro.
You're in WV. Go to the dog racing tracks in Nitro.
007
CAGiversary!
I've only gotten back to actually watching recently because I spend a TON of time traveling in the fall. Not a football guy, so i leave it on.
Honest admission: I like ECW better than Raw. I don't get a chance to watch Smackdown, so I can't speak for that. By the way, I love how Bragging Rights has nothing to do with ECW. Admittedly, the entire roster is about 7 people, but it's not like they usually get much to do on PPV anyway.
Still, even after not watching for close to 8 years, Raw just bores the shit out of me.
Sidenote: so, the PG era. Hornswoggle needs to
off and die, but now they put him with DX? They put the most kid-pandering dude on the show with the guys who still tell people to suck it? What exactly do parents think 'suck it' is referring to?
So, uh, how much longer til Hunter's quad goes again? Like, permanently, maybe? Please?
It's just pointless to complain, I know, since nothing will change. For a long time, really. This is just a painfuling era for those of us who really really want to watch wrestling.
Honest admission: I like ECW better than Raw. I don't get a chance to watch Smackdown, so I can't speak for that. By the way, I love how Bragging Rights has nothing to do with ECW. Admittedly, the entire roster is about 7 people, but it's not like they usually get much to do on PPV anyway.
Still, even after not watching for close to 8 years, Raw just bores the shit out of me.
Sidenote: so, the PG era. Hornswoggle needs to
off and die, but now they put him with DX? They put the most kid-pandering dude on the show with the guys who still tell people to suck it? What exactly do parents think 'suck it' is referring to?So, uh, how much longer til Hunter's quad goes again? Like, permanently, maybe? Please?
It's just pointless to complain, I know, since nothing will change. For a long time, really. This is just a painful
ing era for those of us who really really want to watch wrestling.
benjamouth
CAGiversary!
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I was playing through that WWE Legends game this weekend and matches like the Stone Cold/Rock match from WM 14 (I think) and the HBK/Bret ironman man reminded me how awesome the WWE product used to be. Made me pretty sad.
As for kicking the Raw habit I just play video games instead now, never really started watching ECW and I was never really that attched to Smackdown. I think I watched it more before they moved it to Friday.
As for kicking the Raw habit I just play video games instead now, never really started watching ECW and I was never really that attched to Smackdown. I think I watched it more before they moved it to Friday.
mykevermin
CAGiversary!
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The funny thing is that nobody trying to kick the WWE habit seems to truly be lamenting the fact that the show stinks, and virtually all of us admit that we're only watching because, as creatures of habit, we find it extraordinarily difficult to deviate from a routine we've been participating in for ages.
What it's not: I can't stop watching in case I miss something big!
What it is: I've been doing this for so long on Mondays I don't know what the else to do!
What it's not: I can't stop watching in case I miss something big!
What it is: I've been doing this for so long on Mondays I don't know what the
else to do!
OnyxPrimal
CAGiversary!
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- 10 (100%)
[quote name='mykevermin']The funny thing is that nobody trying to kick the WWE habit seems to truly be lamenting the fact that the show stinks, and virtually all of us admit that we're only watching because, as creatures of habit, we find it extraordinarily difficult to deviate from a routine we've been participating in for ages.
What it's not: I can't stop watching in case I miss something big!
What it is: I've been doing this for so long on Mondays I don't know what the else to do![/QUOTE]
It's true. Humans on the whole are creatures of habit and I'm surprised and a little disappointed in myself that I have been watching for so long and just basically wasting my time. Raw is not a good week in and week out and I'm just tired of going through the motions (much like the WWE writing staff) when I could be doing something else I enjoy like playing a game or spending time with my wife. I'm trying and I'll see how it goes.
What it's not: I can't stop watching in case I miss something big!
What it is: I've been doing this for so long on Mondays I don't know what the
else to do![/QUOTE]It's true. Humans on the whole are creatures of habit and I'm surprised and a little disappointed in myself that I have been watching for so long and just basically wasting my time. Raw is not a good week in and week out and I'm just tired of going through the motions (much like the WWE writing staff) when I could be doing something else I enjoy like playing a game or spending time with my wife. I'm trying and I'll see how it goes.
mykevermin
CAGiversary!
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I'm glad I never picked up a smack habit if it's this much of a pain to stop watching a TV show.
JaytheGamefan
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Interesting note about the star rating system from the newest Observer Radio show - four stars were originally the max, but a Jerry Lawler versus Terry Funk match from Memphis was so good that a fifth star was needed, and thus, the five-star rating system (and frog splash). Cornette created the system, with Norm Dooley using it later, and Meltzer adopting it after him.
S
strongpimphand
Guest
[quote name='Mr. Beef']God damn it, there's nothing wrong with the way Mickie looks.[/QUOTE]
Aint NOTHING wrong with her looks....
...now, her wrestling recently...
Aint NOTHING wrong with her looks....
...now, her wrestling recently...
rickshankshaw
Banned
There is plenty to watch if you don't like RAW.
Smackdown
ECW
TNA Impact
ROH on HDNET
Chikara
PWG
Dragon Gate USA
Smackdown
ECW
TNA Impact
ROH on HDNET
Chikara
PWG
Dragon Gate USA
Iron Clad Burrito
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[quote name='rickshankshaw']There is plenty to watch if you don't like RAW.[/quote]
We know this. The problem is, the only two READILY available are more WWE product.
We all know how to get the rest, even if your cable company doesn't carry HDNET -- but why should we?
We know this. The problem is, the only two READILY available are more WWE product.
We all know how to get the rest, even if your cable company doesn't carry HDNET -- but why should we?
JaytheGamefan
CAGiversary!
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Goldust-Jackson was the best Zeke match ever, but not even the best match of Goldust's since arriving on ECW. Goldust did a lot of good stuff, and Jackson...didn't get in the way of that. So yay PROPHET OF DOOM~! Regal's bit backstage with Ryder was so awesome - Ryder talking down to him until the goon squad arrived, then he chickened out, only to be completely emasculated by Regal. Regal is just so awesome as the lead heel of this show, and he's so vile that other heels hate him as well. Hurricane-Birchill was okay. Not up to par with their usual match, but I liked seeing Birchill win. Helms' Hurri-gut was noticeable here even with the bodysuit, but he still did some good high-flying stuff.
Sheamus' promo was good - he's got something to him on the mic beyond the "me" stuff, and I liked that he brought up WWE having a lot of dead weight. Not so much because it fit his character, but because it seemed like an odd thing to say given the roster depth issues in WWE. Similarly, I liked Striker saying that he can relate to being belittled and coached, but still didn't approve of Ryder turning on Regal. The main event tag was good, but not great. I'm kind of tired of seeing Regal lose so much, but I do look forward to him beating the shit out of Ryder for costing him the match, and Regal's brow-beating of him that led to the loss was great.
Quotes -
The newest Figure 4 Daily with Sara Del Ray is awesome - she reveals that she trained with Khali and used to have to take him grocery shopping. And that she might've been married to him because Khali's uncle gave her a ring that she isn't sure about as he was trying to heal her frequently dislocated knee. Also, Cheerleader Melissa came up with the Raisha Saeed gimmick - she'd originally used it to get into WWE during the Hassan/Daivari deal. She loved working Madison Eagles, who was so good as an amateur she trained for the Australian Olympic team...until she got pregnant. She's also a huge Golden Girls and Mama's Family fan, and doesn't think anything like Real Housewives could ever top them. She has a pet praying mantis AND SHE LOVES KOALAS! She's also wearing pink this month since it's breast cancer awareness month, which I think is pretty cool. I've never heard her in an interview before, but DAMN she was awesome here.
Some awesomely bad wrestling albums -
Hulk Hogan and the Wrestling Boot Band - Hulk Rules -
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=347CG592
Randy Savage - BE A MAN!
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=WMQ8D90Q
And a good one - Piledriver, with a power ballad involving Hillbilly Jim and Vince singing a a warning to rival promoters -
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=4IJIFRPH
Sheamus' promo was good - he's got something to him on the mic beyond the "me" stuff, and I liked that he brought up WWE having a lot of dead weight. Not so much because it fit his character, but because it seemed like an odd thing to say given the roster depth issues in WWE. Similarly, I liked Striker saying that he can relate to being belittled and coached, but still didn't approve of Ryder turning on Regal. The main event tag was good, but not great. I'm kind of tired of seeing Regal lose so much, but I do look forward to him beating the shit out of Ryder for costing him the match, and Regal's brow-beating of him that led to the loss was great.
Quotes -
Josh - WELCOME TO THE LAND OF EXTREME, WHERE THE HOSTILITY LEVELS HAVE NEVER BEEN HIGHER!
Stiker - IT’S THE PROPHET OF DOOM, EZEKIEL JACKSON!
(to Jackson)Kozlov - SMASH Him!
Striker - If you’ve ever felt like an outcast or alone, Josh you’re familiar with this, then you can relate to Goldust.
Josh - WHAT A MOVE FROM THE JUGGERNAUT OF DESTRUCTION, EZEKIAL JACKSON!
Striker - I like that - I’m writing it down!
Striker - The book of Ezekiel talks about salvation and last days - this may be the case for Goldust.
Ryder - I figured out why you and your boys did what you did last week.
Regal - Why?
Ryder - Because you’re threatened by me!
Regal - Threatened? BY YOU!
Ryder - Yeah, you’re not so tough without your goon squad around…(goon squad appears)
Regal - Oh, you’re finished? Good. Pay attention YOU BLITHERING IDIOT! Our very blonde GM, in her limited wisdom, is making me tag with you tonight! I’ll do it because I want to win! Unless you want far worse than what happened last week, I suggest you do what I say. Do I make myself clear?
Ryder - Woo…
Sheamus - Last week on Superstars, I had a match with Shelton, technically, the record books say he won by DQ, but that doesn’t do justice to what REALLY happened! (video airs of him destroying Shelton’s injured arm further) A lot of people have been asking me why I did what I did, but lemme tell ya a little story - 10 years ago, Shelton came to WWE with some one of the most God-given ability ever, but what’s he done with it? NOTHING! He’s wallowed in mediocrity. He’s got some of the most amazing ability I’ve ever seen - but it’s obviously not enough to make it because he hasn’t been on top of the WWE, and I will be, and I’ll use him as a stepping stone to get there. In WWE, there’s a lot of extra baggage - I say lead, follow, or get out of me way! FOLLOW ME TO THE TOP OF THE WWE, BECAUSE I’M GONNA KNOCK LUMPS LIKE SHELTON OFF THE WWE!
Josh - Birchill trained in the brutal European style of sports entertainment!
Josh - WHEN IT COMES TO CHAMPIONSHIPS, IT DOESN’T GET ANY BIGGER THAN JOHN CENA AND RANDY ORTON’S RIVALRY FOR THE WWE TITLE!
Christian - Ready to go? YOSHI! YOSHI! YOSHI! READY TO GO!?
Yoshi - Yes, but I’m very nervous. Main event kaigo.
Christian - That’s what she said.
Yoshi - She said?
Christian - You’re on of the top contenders for the ECW Title - you’ll do great.
Yoshi - DOMO ARAGOTTO!
Christian - I HAVE A LOT OF PEEPS IN JAPAN AND YOU ALWAYS GET THE LAST THANK YOU! OH MY GOD! IT’S ICHIRO!
Yoshi - WHAT!?
Christian - Thank you. (he leaves)
Striker - There’s the self-centered evil genius hell-bent on becoming ECW Champion! (OOOHHHH RADIO hits)
(on SvR 2010) Striker - I have an advance copy - this may be the best game as far as graphics and playability go. And I’m a big gamer. I SAID GAMER!
Josh - How can Regal and Ryder work together? Regal called him a BLITHERING IDIOT EARLIER!?
Striker - HERE COMES YOSHI!
Striker - Yoshi with the rolling snap mare meant to disorient! No pun intended.
(after the basemeant forearm shiver from Christian)Striker - THERE’S THE FLASHPOINT!
(to Ryder)Regal - YOU’RE BLOODY USELESS AS I’VE TOLD YOU BEFORE AND I’LL TELL YOU TODAY! (Ryder snaps Regal’s neck on the rope leading to him being pinned)
Striker - I can understand being belittled and coached, BUT HOW CAN YOU JUSTIFY THAT!?
Stiker - IT’S THE PROPHET OF DOOM, EZEKIEL JACKSON!
(to Jackson)Kozlov - SMASH Him!
Striker - If you’ve ever felt like an outcast or alone, Josh you’re familiar with this, then you can relate to Goldust.
Josh - WHAT A MOVE FROM THE JUGGERNAUT OF DESTRUCTION, EZEKIAL JACKSON!
Striker - I like that - I’m writing it down!
Striker - The book of Ezekiel talks about salvation and last days - this may be the case for Goldust.
Ryder - I figured out why you and your boys did what you did last week.
Regal - Why?
Ryder - Because you’re threatened by me!
Regal - Threatened? BY YOU!
Ryder - Yeah, you’re not so tough without your goon squad around…(goon squad appears)
Regal - Oh, you’re finished? Good. Pay attention YOU BLITHERING IDIOT! Our very blonde GM, in her limited wisdom, is making me tag with you tonight! I’ll do it because I want to win! Unless you want far worse than what happened last week, I suggest you do what I say. Do I make myself clear?
Ryder - Woo…
Sheamus - Last week on Superstars, I had a match with Shelton, technically, the record books say he won by DQ, but that doesn’t do justice to what REALLY happened! (video airs of him destroying Shelton’s injured arm further) A lot of people have been asking me why I did what I did, but lemme tell ya a little story - 10 years ago, Shelton came to WWE with some one of the most God-given ability ever, but what’s he done with it? NOTHING! He’s wallowed in mediocrity. He’s got some of the most amazing ability I’ve ever seen - but it’s obviously not enough to make it because he hasn’t been on top of the WWE, and I will be, and I’ll use him as a stepping stone to get there. In WWE, there’s a lot of extra baggage - I say lead, follow, or get out of me way! FOLLOW ME TO THE TOP OF THE WWE, BECAUSE I’M GONNA KNOCK LUMPS LIKE SHELTON OFF THE WWE!
Josh - Birchill trained in the brutal European style of sports entertainment!
Josh - WHEN IT COMES TO CHAMPIONSHIPS, IT DOESN’T GET ANY BIGGER THAN JOHN CENA AND RANDY ORTON’S RIVALRY FOR THE WWE TITLE!
Christian - Ready to go? YOSHI! YOSHI! YOSHI! READY TO GO!?
Yoshi - Yes, but I’m very nervous. Main event kaigo.
Christian - That’s what she said.
Yoshi - She said?
Christian - You’re on of the top contenders for the ECW Title - you’ll do great.
Yoshi - DOMO ARAGOTTO!
Christian - I HAVE A LOT OF PEEPS IN JAPAN AND YOU ALWAYS GET THE LAST THANK YOU! OH MY GOD! IT’S ICHIRO!
Yoshi - WHAT!?
Christian - Thank you. (he leaves)
Striker - There’s the self-centered evil genius hell-bent on becoming ECW Champion! (OOOHHHH RADIO hits)
(on SvR 2010) Striker - I have an advance copy - this may be the best game as far as graphics and playability go. And I’m a big gamer. I SAID GAMER!
Josh - How can Regal and Ryder work together? Regal called him a BLITHERING IDIOT EARLIER!?
Striker - HERE COMES YOSHI!
Striker - Yoshi with the rolling snap mare meant to disorient! No pun intended.
(after the basemeant forearm shiver from Christian)Striker - THERE’S THE FLASHPOINT!
(to Ryder)Regal - YOU’RE BLOODY USELESS AS I’VE TOLD YOU BEFORE AND I’LL TELL YOU TODAY! (Ryder snaps Regal’s neck on the rope leading to him being pinned)
Striker - I can understand being belittled and coached, BUT HOW CAN YOU JUSTIFY THAT!?
The newest Figure 4 Daily with Sara Del Ray is awesome - she reveals that she trained with Khali and used to have to take him grocery shopping. And that she might've been married to him because Khali's uncle gave her a ring that she isn't sure about as he was trying to heal her frequently dislocated knee. Also, Cheerleader Melissa came up with the Raisha Saeed gimmick - she'd originally used it to get into WWE during the Hassan/Daivari deal. She loved working Madison Eagles, who was so good as an amateur she trained for the Australian Olympic team...until she got pregnant. She's also a huge Golden Girls and Mama's Family fan, and doesn't think anything like Real Housewives could ever top them. She has a pet praying mantis AND SHE LOVES KOALAS! She's also wearing pink this month since it's breast cancer awareness month, which I think is pretty cool. I've never heard her in an interview before, but DAMN she was awesome here.
Some awesomely bad wrestling albums -
Hulk Hogan and the Wrestling Boot Band - Hulk Rules -
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=347CG592
Randy Savage - BE A MAN!
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=WMQ8D90Q
And a good one - Piledriver, with a power ballad involving Hillbilly Jim and Vince singing a a warning to rival promoters -
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=4IJIFRPH
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mykevermin
CAGiversary!
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[quote name='neocisco']I like Thickie James.[/QUOTE]
1)
Yeah, well, she doesn't look like a junkie, so she's on the WWE shitlist.
2) Who the flyin' fuuuuuuck is Slam Master J?
3) ROH is about the only decent alternative pro wrestling product out there. PWG is a close second. The rest are just full of tiny flippy guys who, to be quite honest, don't know how to wrestle at all.
Am I saying I could do better than them? No. I couldn't. I'm not trained. But I understand the old "story" metaphor for a wrestling match, and I know that I'm simply not entertained by matches who are constructed on the premise of spot/setup/spot/setup/spot/setup. I can't say enough how much I hate all that flippy shit.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g-NQcjcdxVA
Go to 1:25. There's NOING IMPACT to Red's two finishers. They're all flash and nothing to sink your teeth into. Let's compare that to easy-to-hate-internet-workrate darling, Kevin Nash.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m1vIYDni3nU
That looks like something that can harm a motherer. Amazing Red's finisher, that won him a title, looked as painful as a fly swatter. That's the problem with all this "alternative" wrestling. They sell wrestling matches to people who think that quasi "independent" means a promotion is good enough to follow, and then fills it with guys whose only concept of conveying an exciting match to fans is to give them enough spots to garner applause.
Independent wrestling fans strike me in the same way as those kids what listen to Fat Wreck Chords or Epitaph, as if that's self-satisfyingly "sticking it to the man." (hey, there are some good albums on that label, but let's be honest: they ain't punk rock in the ideological sense, and they ain't underground anymore than Britney Spears is.) Being an underdog company is not, to me, a self-evident thing that says "hey, this program is worth it."
Find me the last wrestling promotion that has had a good 30-40 minute long 2 out of 3 falls match of nothin' but chain wrestling. I'll follow those motherers. Who are the kids today who are studying Steamboat vs Flair, Sting vs Flair, Malenko vs Guerrero (ECW), Hart vs Michaels, Austin vs Hart (Bret or Owen), Undertaker vs. Angle? Why does it seem to me that wrestlers today only understand that they do one move here, walk to another place, do another move here, walk to yet another place, and do another move here? Who uses the vertical suplex anymore? A backbreaker? Jockeying for advantage via a collar and elbow tieup?
Where the did wrestling go, and why are you people telling me to cheer for glorified gymnastics?
I can't be that jaded. Well, I clearly can be, but I can't be alone in that regard, right?
1)
Yeah, well, she doesn't look like a junkie, so she's on the WWE shitlist.2) Who the flyin' fuuuuuuck is Slam Master J?
3) ROH is about the only decent alternative pro wrestling product out there. PWG is a close second. The rest are just full of tiny flippy guys who, to be quite honest, don't know how to wrestle at all.
Am I saying I could do better than them? No. I couldn't. I'm not trained. But I understand the old "story" metaphor for a wrestling match, and I know that I'm simply not entertained by matches who are constructed on the premise of spot/setup/spot/setup/spot/setup. I can't say enough how much I hate all that flippy shit.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g-NQcjcdxVA
Go to 1:25. There's NO
ING IMPACT to Red's two finishers. They're all flash and nothing to sink your teeth into. Let's compare that to easy-to-hate-internet-workrate darling, Kevin Nash.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m1vIYDni3nU
That looks like something that can harm a mother
er. Amazing Red's finisher, that won him a title, looked as painful as a fly swatter. That's the problem with all this "alternative" wrestling. They sell wrestling matches to people who think that quasi "independent" means a promotion is good enough to follow, and then fills it with guys whose only concept of conveying an exciting match to fans is to give them enough spots to garner applause.Independent wrestling fans strike me in the same way as those kids what listen to Fat Wreck Chords or Epitaph, as if that's self-satisfyingly "sticking it to the man." (hey, there are some good albums on that label, but let's be honest: they ain't punk rock in the ideological sense, and they ain't underground anymore than Britney Spears is.) Being an underdog company is not, to me, a self-evident thing that says "hey, this program is worth it."
Find me the last wrestling promotion that has had a good 30-40 minute long 2 out of 3 falls match of nothin' but chain wrestling. I'll follow those mother
ers. Who are the kids today who are studying Steamboat vs Flair, Sting vs Flair, Malenko vs Guerrero (ECW), Hart vs Michaels, Austin vs Hart (Bret or Owen), Undertaker vs. Angle? Why does it seem to me that wrestlers today only understand that they do one move here, walk to another place, do another move here, walk to yet another place, and do another move here? Who uses the vertical suplex anymore? A backbreaker? Jockeying for advantage via a collar and elbow tieup? Where the
did wrestling go, and why are you people telling me to cheer for glorified gymnastics?I can't be that jaded. Well, I clearly can be, but I can't be alone in that regard, right?
Purple Flames
CAGiversary!
- Feedback
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[quote name='mykevermin']
2) Who the flyin' fuuuuuuck is Slam Master J?[/quote]
Jesse, of Jesse and Festus fame.
2) Who the flyin' fuuuuuuck is Slam Master J?[/quote]
Jesse, of Jesse and Festus fame.
mykevermin
CAGiversary!
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No kiddin'? Oh...yup, sure is. Wow. That's gonna sell some action figures.
rickshankshaw
Banned
[quote name='Iron Clad Burrito']We know this. The problem is, the only two READILY available are more WWE product.
We all know how to get the rest, even if your cable company doesn't carry HDNET -- but why should we?[/QUOTE]
Either you seek out the good stuff or you're lazy and stuck with the shit.
We all know how to get the rest, even if your cable company doesn't carry HDNET -- but why should we?[/QUOTE]
Either you seek out the good stuff or you're lazy and stuck with the shit.
rickshankshaw
Banned
[quote name='mykevermin']1)
3) ROH is about the only decent alternative pro wrestling product out there. PWG is a close second. The rest are just full of tiny flippy guys who, to be quite honest, don't know how to wrestle at all.[/quote]
Ring of Honor just had their worst year in company history.
The general consensus is that PWG is large and by far the best independent promotion of 2009. I think with Cornette coming in, there will be a vast improvement in the project but 2008-2009 was the pits for ROH. It was about as bad and lifeless as RAW.
Chikara is more like the Toy Story of professional wrestling. You'll find guys who do what they do very well but it's not going to be filled with chain wrestling. Personally I don't mind that. I still find it fun and enjoyable and that's what matters to me in the end. However I can get what you mean about the flippy stuff turning you off.
Brian Danielson, Roderick Strong and KENTA vs. American Wolves (Davey Richards and Eddie Edwards) and Chris Hero.
Keep your eyes open for some stiffer than hell elbow shots from Chris Hero. Guy really is coming into his own.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bF7enZPgQYM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xYTxmSXxAjY&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3x825BKox28&feature=related
3) ROH is about the only decent alternative pro wrestling product out there. PWG is a close second. The rest are just full of tiny flippy guys who, to be quite honest, don't know how to wrestle at all.[/quote]
Ring of Honor just had their worst year in company history.
The general consensus is that PWG is large and by far the best independent promotion of 2009. I think with Cornette coming in, there will be a vast improvement in the project but 2008-2009 was the pits for ROH. It was about as bad and lifeless as RAW.
Chikara is more like the Toy Story of professional wrestling. You'll find guys who do what they do very well but it's not going to be filled with chain wrestling. Personally I don't mind that. I still find it fun and enjoyable and that's what matters to me in the end. However I can get what you mean about the flippy stuff turning you off.
Brian Danielson, Roderick Strong and KENTA vs. American Wolves (Davey Richards and Eddie Edwards) and Chris Hero.
Keep your eyes open for some stiffer than hell elbow shots from Chris Hero. Guy really is coming into his own.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bF7enZPgQYM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xYTxmSXxAjY&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3x825BKox28&feature=related
D
Dick Tracy
Guest
[quote name='mykevermin']http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m1vIYDni3nU[/QUOTE]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OOe9H4gxYe0
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OOe9H4gxYe0
Iron Clad Burrito
CAGiversary!
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[quote name='rickshankshaw']Either you seek out the good stuff or you're lazy and stuck with the shit.[/QUOTE]
Again, I'll ask. What MAKES them good? Why SHOULD we care? Myke's got a good question. Who's studying Steamboat/Flair, Flair/Sting, and telling a story with their matches? A solid brawl, a-la Funk-Lawler? (ooo, a ref to an earlier post...)
Again, I'll ask. What MAKES them good? Why SHOULD we care? Myke's got a good question. Who's studying Steamboat/Flair, Flair/Sting, and telling a story with their matches? A solid brawl, a-la Funk-Lawler? (ooo, a ref to an earlier post...)
rickshankshaw
Banned
[quote name='Iron Clad Burrito']Again, I'll ask. What MAKES them good? Why SHOULD we care? Myke's got a good question. Who's studying Steamboat/Flair, Flair/Sting, and telling a story with their matches? A solid brawl, a-la Funk-Lawler? (ooo, a ref to an earlier post...)[/QUOTE]
You're still asking me to do all the work for you. Why should you care? It's not my job to tell you. I'm not going to do anything more to sell you on any number of companies other than to put their product in the thread and allow you to make up your own mind. Stop piggybacking on someone else's ideas. I can't say who is watching what. I don't live with wrestlers.
I feel there are suitable alternatives to the WWE. If you don't like any of them, or are too lazy to look them up, just give up on professional wrestling as a whole. You're obviously not a fan.
Really. JJSP suggested me a PWG DVD. I dropped the money on it based on the trust for a fellow fan. He didn't have to sell me on it any more than that. The same goes for me to you.
You're still asking me to do all the work for you. Why should you care? It's not my job to tell you. I'm not going to do anything more to sell you on any number of companies other than to put their product in the thread and allow you to make up your own mind. Stop piggybacking on someone else's ideas. I can't say who is watching what. I don't live with wrestlers.
I feel there are suitable alternatives to the WWE. If you don't like any of them, or are too lazy to look them up, just give up on professional wrestling as a whole. You're obviously not a fan.
Really. JJSP suggested me a PWG DVD. I dropped the money on it based on the trust for a fellow fan. He didn't have to sell me on it any more than that. The same goes for me to you.
Iron Clad Burrito
CAGiversary!
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[quote name='rickshankshaw']You're still asking me to do all the work for you.[/QUOTE]
No sir, I'm asking you to quit being another one of those jackasses who thinks that vague is the new black. You're taking it personally.
Yes, sir. Thank you.
No sir, I'm asking you to quit being another one of those jackasses who thinks that vague is the new black. You're taking it personally.
Yes, sir. Thank you.
mykevermin
CAGiversary!
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[quote name='rickshankshaw']Ring of Honor just had their worst year in company history.[/QUOTE]
Worst year by what standards? Income/profits? Attendance? Video sales? Matches? Match length, match quality, star power?
Your "worst year" can mean a billion different things - as Burrito says about your vagueness, it's not about you doing the work for us, it's about being clear, about saying what you mean and not saying something just to say something.
So is attendance down or was Dragon/Nigel just a shitshow of a feud?
[quote name='rickshankshaw']If you don't like any of them, or are too lazy to look them up, just give up on professional wrestling as a whole. You're obviously not a fan.[/QUOTE]
The point I'm trying to make is that aside from most ROH and most PWG, those indy feds are "sports entertainment" where dudes don't know how to work (a/k/a DO SOMETHING OTHER THAN TRADE PUNCHES WHEN TRANSITIONING FROM SPOT TO SPOT FOR'S SAKE!), or they're glorified gymnasts who don't tell a compelling in-ring story and make no sense in how they wrestle.
EDIT: I dare you to take up a drinking game for the next wrestling program you watch. Drink every time you see wrestlers trade punches to move from spot to spot. Even if there's only 8 minutes of in-ring action per hour like on Raw, you'll burn through a bottle of booze, I assure you. That's what I'm pointing to when I say dudes don't know how to work. Today's wrestlers are so bad that they have made the crowd indifferent to something as simple (and effective) as a punch.
Worst year by what standards? Income/profits? Attendance? Video sales? Matches? Match length, match quality, star power?
Your "worst year" can mean a billion different things - as Burrito says about your vagueness, it's not about you doing the work for us, it's about being clear, about saying what you mean and not saying something just to say something.
So is attendance down or was Dragon/Nigel just a shitshow of a feud?
[quote name='rickshankshaw']If you don't like any of them, or are too lazy to look them up, just give up on professional wrestling as a whole. You're obviously not a fan.[/QUOTE]
The point I'm trying to make is that aside from most ROH and most PWG, those indy feds are "sports entertainment" where dudes don't know how to work (a/k/a DO SOMETHING OTHER THAN TRADE PUNCHES WHEN TRANSITIONING FROM SPOT TO SPOT FOR
'S SAKE!), or they're glorified gymnasts who don't tell a compelling in-ring story and make no sense in how they wrestle.EDIT: I dare you to take up a drinking game for the next wrestling program you watch. Drink every time you see wrestlers trade punches to move from spot to spot. Even if there's only 8 minutes of in-ring action per hour like on Raw, you'll burn through a bottle of booze, I assure you. That's what I'm pointing to when I say dudes don't know how to work. Today's wrestlers are so bad that they have made the crowd indifferent to something as simple (and effective) as a punch.
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mykevermin
CAGiversary!
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On a more dispassionate note, my wife read an article on Chyna for a women's studies class (women's studies in pop culture) she's taking. They discussed how as an on-screen character, Chyna's sexuality was never questioned on air, but her gender was.
They also discussed Goldust (whose original persona was just a rip off of the exoticos from lucha libre). I was suddenly reminded by how *over* Goldust got as a heel in his original feud with Razor Ramon - premised pretty much on the single fact that he hinted, very flagrantly, at being a homosexual (let's be real, crowds weren't booing Goludst because of his movie quotes). Then I was reminded how stunning his immediate face turn was, and how the crowd responded to it so strongly. Can't find it on YouTube, but it went like this on Raw.
In-ring interview with Lawler:
Lawler: Aren't you...gay?
Goldust: NO.
Goldust then proceeds to beat up Lawler, getting the crowd in his favor, and becoming a hero for defending himself against the fact that he was not sexually interested in men.
Now I'm not turning this into the hyperliberal (which I am) preacher's pulpit. Wrestling is what it is, and gays as heels have been in vogue for longer than half a century (at least). I'm just stunned by how easily a character's sexuality was manipulated (the only thing that changed about the guy, really) to turn him from a hated heel to a beloved babyface so immediately and without buildup.
And the other thing that struck me was Lawler's use of language on WWF TV:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rt8Pykizn2I
I don't remember him saying "flaming $$$" on air at all.
They also discussed Goldust (whose original persona was just a rip off of the exoticos from lucha libre). I was suddenly reminded by how *over* Goldust got as a heel in his original feud with Razor Ramon - premised pretty much on the single fact that he hinted, very flagrantly, at being a homosexual (let's be real, crowds weren't booing Goludst because of his movie quotes). Then I was reminded how stunning his immediate face turn was, and how the crowd responded to it so strongly. Can't find it on YouTube, but it went like this on Raw.
In-ring interview with Lawler:
Lawler: Aren't you...gay?
Goldust: NO.
Goldust then proceeds to beat up Lawler, getting the crowd in his favor, and becoming a hero for defending himself against the fact that he was not sexually interested in men.
Now I'm not turning this into the hyperliberal (which I am) preacher's pulpit. Wrestling is what it is, and gays as heels have been in vogue for longer than half a century (at least). I'm just stunned by how easily a character's sexuality was manipulated (the only thing that changed about the guy, really) to turn him from a hated heel to a beloved babyface so immediately and without buildup.
And the other thing that struck me was Lawler's use of language on WWF TV:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rt8Pykizn2I
I don't remember him saying "flaming $$$" on air at all.
Purple Flames
CAGiversary!
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Wow, that didn't even sound like your typical heel promo that crossed the line. It went beyond it and sounded like he let loose with his personal beliefs on the job.
That was honestly pretty hard to watch.
That was honestly pretty hard to watch.
bread's done