Durham University: Stop Nutting in the Showers!

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[quote name='Re: Masturbation in Showers']We have recently found several blockages in showers in university owned accomodation, most commonly caused by human hair.

However, over last term we found many of these blockages to be caused by large quantities of what we have now determined to be semen. This is intolerable, and we shall be tracing the culprits by means of DNA matching if the problem persists.

May we advise students who wish to masturbate to do so in the comfort of their own rooms, rather than in the showers.

Thank you for taking time to read this document

P Robinson,
Director,
Estates and Buildings[/quote]
http://lengmou.blogspot.com/2006/02/semen-from-masturbation-causes.html
 
I remember hearing some joke from a stand up show, "i jack off so much I'm surprised a baby doesn't pop outta the shower drain"....something like that anyway.
 
[quote name='humidore']I remember hearing some joke from a stand up show, "i jack off so much I'm surprised a baby doesn't pop outta the shower drain"....something like that anyway.[/quote]

Haha.

I thought we Americans were wank-a-holics -- but the Birtish upped us. They can clog showers.
 
[quote name='humidore']I remember hearing some joke from a stand up show, "i jack off so much I'm surprised a baby doesn't pop outta the shower drain"....something like that anyway.[/QUOTE]
I thought the joke went "I jack off in the shower so much when it rains my d*ck gets hard"
 
[quote name='rmewpm']I thought the joke went "I jack off in the shower so much when it rains my d*ck gets hard"[/quote]
:rofl:
 
When I lived in the dorms, I wouldn't have found masturbating in my room to be all that comforting...since I lived in a single room with another person.
 
This is like when people tell you about a dream, it's like saying 'Hey, here's something that didn't happen to me at all but I'm going to tell you with such passion that it's like it happened. But it didn't. So any how...there were these spiders with big tits"

I mean, come on, how they gonna pull DNA out of a shower drain and catch the right people? Hair, snot, spit, it's all the same under the microscope. You can't just go, "Computer, focus on just the jizz samples" This aint Deep Space Battle Station: The Final Episode.

Yet.
 
Thats too funny. I begged my roomates in college not to stroke it in the shower, because I would take the occasional hangover cure bath, and knew that the 30 min long showers they would take, were funkin' it up. That clog is definetly more than hair. LOL! NOT IN THE SHOWER MAN< IM GETTING IN NEXT!
 
I have been using this on a daily basis since I found it but.....

eekout9uq.gif
 
"I masturbate constantly, like if I kept doing it, they'd give me a medal".

Freshman year, if you didn't get up early enough to get firsts on a stall, you were definately gonna get spunked--- wear your flip-flops goddamnit!
 
I puked in the bathtub once when I was a Freshman in college (Thats what happens when you drink a whole bottle of Yukon Jack). Im surprised that didnt clog up the drains.
 
[quote name='Xevious']I puked in the bathtub once when I was a Freshman in college (Thats what happens when you drink a whole bottle of Yukon Jack). Im surprised that didnt clog up the drains.[/QUOTE]

If you are unlucky enough to live in a dorm that has community showers and bathrooms, they'll pretty much be unusable on the weekends because the cleaning staff doesn't clean them on the weekends and people puke all over the place, urinals, toilets, showers, etc.

Also, there is no way that semen will clog a drain, think of how diluted it will be with gallons of water used in a shower, plus semen is mostly liquid anyway. O well one more reason to wear your shower shoes. Every guy in college knows when there roommates have class, just jerk it then.
 
[quote name='lionheart4life']If you are unlucky enough to live in a dorm that has community showers and bathrooms, they'll pretty much be unusable on the weekends because the cleaning staff doesn't clean them on the weekends and people puke all over the place, urinals, toilets, showers, etc.

Also, there is no way that semen will clog a drain, think of how diluted it will be with gallons of water used in a shower, plus semen is mostly liquid anyway. O well one more reason to wear your shower shoes. Every guy in college knows when there roommates have class, just jerk it then.[/QUOTE]
That and when people get drunk and shit in the elevator, and guess who has to clean it up on the weekends? The poor RA who is on duty, my RA was pissed for the entire weekend after that one :lol:
 
My Freshman year, someone a floor below us took a shit right in the middle of the hallway, just in front of the bathroom. The RA was pissed, and told the RD, the RD woke everyone up and they had to clean it up as a group---

Thankfully I was out getting drunk, and missed that action.
 
[quote name='KwanzaaTimmy']My Freshman year, someone a floor below us took a shit right in the middle of the hallway, just in front of the bathroom. The RA was pissed, and told the RD, the RD woke everyone up and they had to clean it up as a group---

Thankfully I was out getting drunk, and missed that action.[/QUOTE]
College students do some really stupid things. At one point someone set fire to the bulletin board on our floor. Seriously WTF are they thinking?
 
[quote name='guardian_owl']College students do some really stupid things. At one point someone set fire to the bulletin board on our floor. Seriously WTF are they thinking?[/QUOTE]

I wonder what would happen if I set the bulletin board on fire?
 
[quote name='KwanzaaTimmy']My Freshman year, someone a floor below us took a shit right in the middle of the hallway, just in front of the bathroom. The RA was pissed, and told the RD, the RD woke everyone up and they had to clean it up as a group---

Thankfully I was out getting drunk, and missed that action.[/quote]
Apparently, on the floor I lived on, someone decided to take a crap in someone's room while most people were asleep. Good reason to lock your door. Had the RD come to tell me to clean the shit up, I'd tell him to go fuck himself.
 
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