Jack Thompson is being a dick again...perpetually (Update: Bitchslapped by P-A.com)

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Update, 10-17-05:

Today, three amazing things happened in the battle on gamers vs. Jack Doughboy Thompson.

1. A team has created his exact simulator he asked for by modding San Andreas to his specifications. The link is here but it seems to be flooded at the moment. I'm sure mirrors will appear soon. The team - GTA players Fighting Hellfish - titled it Defamation of Character: A Jack Thompson Murder Simulator.

2. Thompson replied by saying that 1) we don't understand his satire, 2) our actions clearly show our willingness to further corrupt humanity, and 3) the game wasn't to his specifications at all.

3. Because of this, he has refused to donate the supposed $10K he said he would to a charity to help restrict gaming violence/exposure to small children. This is where it gets really good. Penny-Arcade.com has officially bitchslapped the hell out of him. I will quote since that is the only way to do it justice:

You know what, Jack? We're going to be the men you're not. You said that your insulting, illusory ten thousand dollars would go to the charity of Paul Eibler's choice. We've got a good guess that he'd direct your nonexistant largesse toward The Entertainment Software Association Foundation, a body that has raised over six point seven million dollars over the last eight years. We've just made the donation you never would, and never meant to. Ten thousand dollars' worth. And we made it in your name.

Pure ownage.

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I'm sure most have heard of his new proposal, in which he will donate $10,000 to a charity if someone indulges his Saturn-sized ego of creating a highly violent videogame.

In short, it centers around a father whose son was killed by a gamer. Supposedly the gamer was way into some violent game (he doesn't directly name GTA but it's easy to draw that conclusion) where he killed people with bats, and then slaughtered the father's son. After he is convicted and sent to life in the jail, the father goes nuts thinking that justice was not served. So he goes INSANE and decides it's vigilante justice time, bitch. So he picks up all manner of weapons - guns, bats, etc - and proceeds to walk around slaughtering the developers of the game, the lawyers who defended the games actions (think freedom of speech for the gaming development community, Jack phrased it oddly), etc etc etc, a long unending list of nonsense, rhetoric, and non-sequiter rambling ensues.

So I was thinking, let's give him his cake and watch him have to shove it up his ass.

I propose a text adventure game. How honestly hard could it be to put it together.

>YOU SEE PEOPLES. KILLS DEMS? Y OR N
Y
>YOU KILL PEOPLES. N, S, E, W?
N
>YOU ENTER A PLACE WITH MORE PEOPLES. KILL DEMS? Y OR N

And so on. We could even have a score system. Did you kill people? 100 points. Did you not kill people? No points, you lose, AND the game calls you a pussy.

I'm not bored or ....um...unbusy enough to make such a thing. But how great would it be to see gamers finally show this idiot up?

(Note: I do think this is a good idea but I don't necessarily care if it happens or not. I'm mostly just talking because I'm still on lunch break.)

He's a link to the story in question: http://www.kotaku.com/gaming/violent-games/jack-thompson-offers-10k-charity-for-proposal-130254.php

EDIT: Damn semantics.
 
This guy is so fucking stupid.

Jack Thompson will give $10,000 to charity if any videogame company makes and releases a game based on a scenario he created.
Miami, Florida Attorney Jack Thompson, a long-time outspoken critic of violent and sexually explicit videogames, has done something totally unexpected. Thompson today actually proposed a violent videogame, and will pay $10,000 to the favorite charity of Paul Eibeler (the Chairman of Take-Two Interactive) if any videogame company will "create, manufacture, distribute, and sell a video game in 2006" based on a scenario he created.

Thompson's proposal is titled A Modest Video Game Proposal and has been sent to members of the press and apparantly to Douglas Lowenstein, President of the ESA.

Here's Thompson's proposal (italics are his, not ours):

"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." The Golden Rule

This writer has been saying for seven years that violent video games can be "murder simulators" that incite as well as train some obsessive teen players to be violent.

I've been on 60 Minutes and in Reader's Digest this year explaining how an Alabama teen, with no criminal record, shot two policemen and a dispatcher in their heads and fled in a police car--a scenario he rehearsed for hundreds of hours on Take-Two/Rockstar's Grand Theft Auto video games.

I have sat with boys in jail cells, their lives over because of murder convictions, after they, with no history of violence, have killed innocents while in a dreamlike state. Said one cop who investigated such a murder in Grand Rapids, Michigan: "The killing was like an extension of the game."

The video game industry, through its lawyers, its spokesmen, and its head lobbyist, Doug Lowenstein, the president of the Entertainment Software Association, all say it is utter nonsense to suggest that what is dumped into a kid's head hour after hour, day after day, year after year, could possibly have behavioral consequences. Cigarette ads can persuade kids to smoke, but interactive simulators in which these same kids punch, hack, bludgeon, and maim affect not a wit their attitudes and behaviors, notwithstanding the findings of the American Psychological Association, published in August 2005.

The video game industry says Sticks and stones can break my bones, but games can never hurt me. Fine. I have a modest proposal for the video game industry. I'll write a check for $10,000 to the favorite charity of Take-Two Interactive Software, Inc's chairman, Paul Eibeler - a man Bernard Goldberg ranks as #43 in his book 100 People Who Are Screwing Up America - if any video game company will create, manufacture, distribute, and sell a video game in 2006 like the following:

Osaki Kim is the father of a high school boy beaten to death with a baseball bat by a 14-year-old gamer. The killer obsessively played a violent video game in which one of the favored ways of killing is with a bat. The opening scene, before the interactive game play begins, is the Los Angeles courtroom in which the killer is sentenced "only" to life in prison after the judge and the jury have heard experts explain the connection between the game and the murder.

Osaki Kim (O.K.) exits the courtroom swearing revenge upon the video game industry whom he is convinced contributed to his son's murder. "Vengeance is mine, I will repay" he says. And boy, is O.K. not kidding.

O.K. is provided in his virtual reality playpen a panoply of weapons: machetes, Uzis, revolvers, shotguns, sniper rifles, Molotov cocktails, you name it. Even baseball bats. Especially baseball bats.

O.K. first hops a plane from LAX to New York to reach the Long Island home of the CEO of the company (Take This) that made the murder simulator on which his son's killer trained. O.K. gets "justice" by taking out this female CEO, whose name is Paula Eibel, along with her husband and kids. "An eye for an eye," says O.K., as he urinates onto the severed brain stems of the Eibel family victims, just as you do on the decapitated cops in the real video game Postal2.

O.K. then works his way, methodically back to LA by car, but on his way makes a stop at the Philadelphia law firm of Blank, Stare and goes floor by floor to wipe out the lawyers who protect Take This in its wrongful death law suits. "So sue me" O.K. spits, with singer Jackson Brown's 1980's hit Lawyers in Love blaring.

With the FBI now after him, O.K. keeps moving westward, shooting up high-tech video arcades called GameWerks. "Game over," O.K. laughs.

Of course, O.K. makes the obligatory runs to virtual versions of brick and mortar retailers Best Buy, Circuit City, Target, and Wal-Mart to steal supplies and bludgeon store managers and cash register clerks. "You should have checked kids' IDs!"

O.K. pushes on to Los Angeles. He must get there by May 10, 2006. That is the beginning of "E3" -- the Electronic Entertainment Expo -- the Super Bowl of the video game industry. O.K. must get to E3 to massacre all the video game industry execs with one final, monstrously delicious rampage.

How about it, video game industry? I've got the check and you've got the tech. It's all a fantasy, right? No harm can come from such a game, right? Go ahead, video game moguls. Target yourselves as you target others. I dare you.

Jack Thompson is a Miami lawyer who has for 18 years been involved in efforts to stop the marketing of adult entertainment to minors.
 
I think his father touched him when he was young and his mother didn't give him any hugs. He's just looking for a way to vent his internal problems and seems like gaming is his victim. :D
 
[quote name='Chris in Cali']What a nutjob, he seriously needs help.[/QUOTE]

He's just another opportunist who wants to get his name in the papers to build brand recognition for his two-bit law firm. If we all just ignore him for a while, maybe he'll shut up and go away. :D
 
Uh, doesn't this...obliterate his credibility as a rational, competent lawyer? I mean, what's he trying to accomplish with this?

As everybody's been saying, this just appears nutty. I think he's hurting his cause. Good.
 
Haha, Penny Arcade OWNED him.

You may have seen Jack’s proposal mentioned on various news sites. He’s offering 10 grand to charity if a game developer makes a game based on his insane proposal.

So I got his email address and I went ahead and sent Jack a note this morning:

10 grand is pretty weak man. Through our charity www.childsplaycharity.org gamers have given over half a million dollars in toys and cash to children’s hospitals all over the country.

I’ll let you know if he responds.

The fact is when we kick off Child’s Play 2005 on November 1st we’ll be going global. We’ll be delivering videogames and toys to children’s hospitals all over the world now. I don’t think there’s any better response to Jack’s insane ramblings than that. Maybe Jack would like to donate his 10 grand to Child’s Play, that could buy a lot of Game Boys.

-Gabe out


And on Jack's response:
My email sig had my phone number in it. Jack actually just called and screamed at me for a couple minutes. He said if I email him again I will “regret it”. What a violent man.

-Gabe out
 
hugemanatee.jpg
 
I'm sure someone is already at work making this game. Everyone dislikes this man TOO much to not take him up on it. The sad fact is, however, that it won't shut him up or one up him. He's not demented or retarded; he's a sensationalist who has found a great way to make money.
 
Well sine Jack's back in the news and crazy as ever, I figure I might as well post Ctrl-Alt-Del's version of Jack's childhood:

20050808.jpg
 
Can't this be construed as a physical threat to video game CEOs and the attendees at E3?

I think it's great that Governor Jeb Bush of Florida is working with this quack - first Shaivo and now this - hey Jeb go for the hatrick and you'll be the MVP of the Democratic party!
 
[quote name='sblymnlcrymnl']Saying "again" implies that he stopped at some point.[/QUOTE]

Aww. :sad: I was just about to point that out. That modifier makes it sound like he un-douched himself.
 
[quote name='sblymnlcrymnl']Saying "again" implies that he stopped at some point.[/QUOTE]
For real the post should be Jack Thompson is being himself again.
 
I would actually like to see someone make this game. It could be a good move for Take-Two because they seems likes this kind of stuff. Plus when someone commits a crime aganist a video game developer and blame on the game, I like to see what Jack has to say.
 
Wow good idea. Spend millions of dollars creating a game, and he'll dontate 10 grand to charity! If he has 10 grand extra, he should donate it to charity anyway.
 
Zeiganfreid: we need katamari jack thompson
Zeiganfreid: oh SHIT THAT WOULD BE AWESOME
Zeiganfreid: you run over kids
BK Partisan: hahaha
Zeiganfreid: OMFG YOU ARE SQUASHING ME
Zeiganfreid: and then jack thompson chuckles evily
BK Partisan: "COLORADO STUDENT CRUSHES CLASSMATES WITH GIANT... BALL THING"
Zeiganfreid: ""COLORADO STUDENT CRUSHES CLASSMATES WITH GIANT... BALL THING...MADE OF OTHER STUDENTS!" OH THE HUMANITY
BK Partisan: but the music is pleasant
BK Partisan: so no one complains
BK Partisan: getting squashed is ok when ducks are singing "la la la la"
Zeiganfreid: You could go a World War 2 shooter Jack Thompson
Zeiganfreid: and have him run around the battlefield, defenseless
Zeiganfreid: "DID YOU PLAY VIDEO GAMES?"
Zeiganfreid: ..." DID YOU PLAY VIDEO GAMES?"
Zeiganfreid: "...WHO IN THE HELL HERE PLAYED VIDEO GAMES?!!"
BK Partisan: silly jack thompson, it 1941
Zeiganfreid: NO ITS NOT
Zeiganfreid: I AM THE KING OF SIAM
Zeiganfreid: BRING ME MY ELEPHANTS!
BK Partisan: he's lost it
BK Partisan: get one o' them crazy buckets
 
[quote name='chickenhawk']:rofl: Thanks for the update. That is fucking great! Way to go Penny-Arcade!!! :lol:[/QUOTE]
Totally, grats to them. :applause:
 
[quote name='dooddude']
gamerswin.jpg


I know it sucks, I did it w/ MS Paint. I dont have photoshop,but this gets the point across[/QUOTE]
good post
 
heh, the hilarity keeps on coming

[quote name='gabe']I thought you might like to see the mail I got from Jack this afternoon:

This story is completely false and defamatory. Take it down or else.

And my reply to him:

****This is an automated response****

Thank you for contacting Penny Arcade. I’m sorry but I am simply not able to respond to all my fan mail. I want you to know that I’m glad you enjoy the comic strip and I appreciate you taking the time to mail me.

-Gabe out [/QUOTE]
 
Call me crazy, but I read what the mod does for GTA and it doesn't actually fit exactly to the game JT wanted made.


Of course, that doesn't excuse him from saying that it was all satire anyway and that he never intended to pay the money.
 
Update, also on Penny Arcade front page now.

[quote name='"the interwookie"']In a letter faxed to Seattle Police Chief Gil Kerlikowske (left), Thompson says, in part, "A Seattle business by the name of Penny Arcade... employs certain personnel who have decided to commence and orchestrate criminal harassment of me by various means... This company has done this because I dared to go on CBS's 60 Minutes in March and again in July to explain a wrongful death lawsuit I have brought on behalf of two police officers and a police dispatcher in Fayette, Alabama, who were shot in the head and killed by Devin Moore who obsessively trained on Grand Theft Auto: Vice City to kill them."

"As you may know, this incredibly violent Rockstar Games product is actually a 'cop-killing' murder simulator. There are a bunch of computer geeks out there who think that the video game industry has a constitutional right to paint a bullseye on your back and on your officers' backs... That is what this criminal harassment of me by Penny Arcade is all about. They're even selling an 'I Hate Jack Thompson' t-shirt, but that is just the tip of the iceberg. These idiots have been so careless as to post on their www.pennyarcade.com web site what they are doing regarding the harassment of me."

"I look forward to working with your fine Police Department to shut this little extortion factory down and/or arrest some of its employees."[/quote]
 
I bet they are getting so many hits right now thats its slowing them down. Furthermore, I didnt realize they sold I hate JT t-shirts. They are about to see a massive sales spike, if only for yesterdays highly touted charity donation.
 
why not a net wide hate of this guy ive barly heard of him we should have jack thomson hate on every video game website on the net hes gonna get attention regarudless he probly wanted them to make the mod just looking for an exscuse to start shit with them publicly .

This guy seems to be making his living off this just like a dirty cop when u dont see a crime go hassle someone .
 
John B. Thompson, Attorney at Law
1172 South Dixie Hwy., Suite 111
Coral Gables, Florida 33146
305-666-4366


He's REALLY friendly on the phone
 
The amount of utter pwnege that Penny-Arcade is laying down on Doughboy is absolutely hysterical.

They are my heroes. They have been in that state for quite some time, but this takes them to legendary heights.

How long until this gets national attention? Maybe they'll get their own TV show and sell wang hangers to eager viewers.

Edit: Lol, chakan, is that for real? And did you call him? Makes me want to find a payphone. :)
 
I can't believe someone so inarticulate is actually a lawyer. He's making all of us look bad (not that we need any additional help in that department).
 
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