Post Your Favorite Simpsons Quotes!!

"Get in the plane." - Mr. Burns wanting Smithers to take a ride with him on the Spruce Moose

"hardcore nudity"- Troy McClure at end of simpsons clip show

"Do you want to change your name to Homer, Jr.? The kids can call you Hoju!" - Homer

"My bologna has a first name / It's H-O-M-E-R / My bologna has a second name / It's H-O-M-E-R" - Homer (probably my favorite)

"Simpson, Homer Simpson / He's the greatest guy in history / From the, town of Springfield / He's about to hit a chestnut tree."-Homer
 
"Me, fail english? Unpossible!" -ralph

after eating wildberries.. "tastes like burning." -ralph again

ralph just fucking cracks me up.
 
ganeshomer.gif


I AM GANESH. This wedding angers me!

ALL WILL DIE!
 
Homer: No TV, no beer, makes Homer something something...
Marge: ...go crazy?
Homer: Don't mind if I do! (crazed gibberish)

Lenny: Ah, my eye! My doctor said I wasn't supposed to get pudding in it!

Chief Wiggum: No, you've got the wrong number. This is nine one...two.

Dr. Nick (singing): The knee bone's connected to the...something. The something's connected to the...red thing. The red thing's connected to my...wrist watch. Uh oh.
 
Lisa - Well how do we get to branson?
Mother - Number 10 Bus
Kid - Hey Ma, how bout some cookies?
Mother - No dice
Kid - This aint over.
 
Probably my favorite simpsons episode, Bad Man (The episode where Homer takes the candy off the babysitter and eats it.)

(Rock Bottom airing an edited interview with Homer)

Homer: Somebody had to take the babysitter home. Then I noticed she was
sitting on [splice] her sweet [splice] can. [splice] -- o I grab
her -- [splice] sweet can. [splice] Oh, just thinking about
[splice] her [splice] can [splice] I just wish I had he --
[splice] sweet [splice] sweet [splice] s-s-sweet [splice] can.
Jones: So, Mr. Simpson: you admit you grabbed her can. What do you have
to say in your defense?
Homer: [looking lustful in a clearly-paused VCR shot]
Jones: Mr. Simpson, your silence will only incriminate you further.
[paused shot of Homer grows larger]
No, Mr. Simpson, don't take your anger out on me. Get back! Get
back! Mist -- Mr. Simpson -- nooo!

___________________

Jones: Tomorrow, on "Rock Bottom":
[slomo of Willy walking into Godfrey's office] he's a
foreigner who takes perverted videos of you when you least
expect it. He's "Rowdy Roddy Peeper"...
Homer: Oh, that man is _sick_!
Marge: Groundskeeper Willy saved you, Homer.
Homer: But listen to the music! He's evil!
 
Not sure if these were already posted, but what the hell:

Luigi: Go ahead-a, Bart, take-a the Bonestorm.
Mario: The store, she's so rich. She'll-a never notice.
Donkey Kong: Duh, it's the company's fault for making you want it so much.
Lee Carvello: Don't do it, son. How's that game going to help your putting?
Sonic: Just take it! Take it, take it, take it, take it, take it! TAKE IT!!

Buy me Bonestorm, or go to HELL (at least I think that's what it was)!!

Also, two of my all-time favorite random, made up characters: Ku Klux Clam and Professor Gas Can.
 
Bart: Oh yeah? Well you're gay for Moleman!
Lisa: No you're gay for Moleman!
Moleman: Ohhh....no one's gay for Moleman....

Lisa: Below the equato......THIS LINE, toilets flush counter clockwise.
Bart: So down here in say *spins globe* Argentina or....Rand McNally, their toilets flush backwards?
Lisa: Yes Bart, and in RAND McNALLY people wear hats on their feet and hamburgers eat PEOPLE!

Homer: Save me Jeebus!

Baby lamb: Li-i-i-sa-a-a! I thought you l-o-o-oved me! LO-O-O-OVED ME!!

Zombie Shakespeare: Is this the end of Zombie Shakespeare!?

Zombie Flanders: Hey Simpson, mind if I nibble your ear?
*Homer shoots Ned w/shotgun*
Bart: Wow dad! You just killed Zombie Flanders!
Homer: .....he was a zombie?

Comic Book Guy: She is sleeping blissfully in the many folds of my Spiderman t-shirt.
 
here's some good ones o haven't seen posted yet.

Chief Wiggum: Fat Tony is a cancer on this fair city! He is the cancer and I am the ... uh ... what cures cancer?

Duffman: Duffman can never die, only the actors who play him. Ooh yeah!

Ralph: Daddy, I'm scared. Too scared to even wet my pants.
Chief Wiggum: Just relax and it'll come, son.

Homer: Oh, so they have internet on computers now!
 
How could I forget this gem...

Homer> There's a $10,000 bill in it for you.
Barney> Oh YEA? Which president is on it??
Homer> Uh..All of them. They're having a party. Jimmy Carter is passed out on the couch.
 
[quote name='Strell']How could I forget this gem...

Homer> There's a $10,000 bill in it for you.
Barney> Oh YEA? Which president is on it??
Homer> Uh..All of them. They're having a party. Jimmy Carter is passed out on the couch.[/quote]

That just reminded me of "With $10,000 we'd be millionaires!!! We could buy anything we wanted ... like love."
 
Prolly the last time I'll bump this thread.

Bart > (something something) just like that lemon-shaped rock over there. ... Hey! There's a lemon behind that rock!

Homer> Hey Marge, look! This can says beernuts on the outside, but on the inside there's springy snakes! The look on the poor sap's face when he opens the can! Hehehehehe! ... Mmmm, beeeeeeeeeeeernuts. *opens* AUUGHHHHH!
 
Ralph saying "Super Nintendo Chalmers" always cracks me up.

My favorite saying, though, is when Homer is trying to get Bart and Lisa to quit fighting:

Homer> If either of you says another word, Bart doesn't get to watch cartoons and Lisa doesn't get to go to college.
 
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